Chapter 1

Well another beautiful day, that's what the weather man said, Shit, goin to be over a hundred again, beautiful my ass, maybe for those sittin in air conditioned offices. Well I better get this wiring job out of the way early, don't wanna be in that attic after ten, hell it's already pushing eighty degrees.

"Hey Stu, what's up?"

"Jim, how's it goin?," yea that's me, James Trent Electrical Contractor, Fifty-Five years old an been doin this for almost Thirty years, 'same ol shit', well it's a living, I mean, I sure ain't rich. Mostly just makin end's meet, sometimes just ahead of the bill collectors, but that's to be expected of a single parent with a couple kids. The kids are grown now, last one left home a couple weeks ago, goin into the Marines to fight Terrorist's, well I won't go into how I feel about that.

"Stu, Ya know better than to ask!"

"Back still botherin ya, Jim?"

"Ya, Stu, I'm goin hit the attic an get the unit finished up early, before it get's too dam hot, all that's left is to wire up the Air Handler, then I'm done."

"Good, these people will be happy to have the A C this afternoon, I've just got a couple things left, then charge the system, then we get a couple of cold one's at the Pub'."

"Sounds good to me."

Dam I hate crawlin these attic's anymore, these trusses are hard on the knee's, well stop bitchin an get it wired. Why do these thing's always have the knockouts for the wire on the wrong side, gotta lay across the trusses in this insulation, gas line for a pillow, flash light won't stay put, wire in my ear and it's startin to get Hot, Fuck!

"Jim."

"WHAT?"

"We just lost power."

"Stu check the gfci."

"I did, I rest it, still no power."

"Then check the breaker." Dam ya think I was here to babysit them, Hell, they'd know what to check if I weren't here.

'Oh no', wrong breaker, I can't get that wire off me.

It's dark, are my eyes open, last thing I remembered was getting shocked, I'm covered in something, a sheet over my head, am I dead? No, not dead I can move my arms, well let's pull this sheet off, still dark, lighter though, window above me, I'm on a bed, but where, it's not my bed. Maybe at the house I was wiring, but that was hours ago I would of thought if I was knocked out for hours some one would have called for the paramedics, and I would be in a hospital or something.

Well there's only one way to find out where I am, that's to get up, Wow that's strange, I almost bounce out of the bed, and where's the back pain, Shit all I've got on is underware, where the Fuck are my clothes? Let's get the light on, there, Well I'm standing in some kids room, football, baseball bat, clothes on the floor, but not mine, Holy Shit, what happened to my pot belly, this has gotta be a dream, wierd, well check this out I can bend over and touch the floor, no pain, I've gotta piss so let's see if I can find something to wear, cut-offs and they fit, a little tight, but that's ok. I've gotta find a head, just hope I don't get shot stumblin around in who know's who's house in the middle of the night, door, bathroom nite light on, yes that feels better.

"Jim is that you?"

"Yea, I had to go to the bathroom."

"Ok, back to bed, good night."

"Ok, nite." That voice sounds familiar, and my voice, not so familiar, well back to bed I'm sure everthing will be back to normal in the morning.

"Are you all tucked in Jim?" I reconized the voice.

"Mom!" That's the last thing I remembered until I heard a voice calling me to breakfast.

"I'll be there in a few minutes." Oh my God, this is a dream, Mom passed away five years ago in ninety-nine from cancer, maybe this isn't a dream, maybe I'm really dead and this is hell, Christ if I have to live through watching mom go through that again, even five years later not a day goes by that I almost break down and cry, the pain of watching her, dam I'm almost cryin again. What did I do that was bad enough to end up in Hell, God, Why.

"Son I'll see you tonight gotta go to work now."

"Bye Dad." My Dad, last time I remember him was in the hospital with tubes, and machines, then the doctor. Brain Hemorage, at Forty-Five.

Yep, Nightmare, or Dead and in Hell. I'm goin back to sleep and when I wake up, well, I don't know, would I be dead, or in hospital or, or what.

"Jim I know this is your summer vacation, but you don't need to be lazy, we still have some unpacking to do from the move and I could use your help."

"Um, sure Mom, I'll be right out, I'm gonna shower first though, ok"

"I'll be out in the garage going through the boxes."

"Ok Mom, be out in a few."

Well dream or whatever, this sure seems real, Naw, but still I might as well get up and shower. This house, I remember it, we rented it for a few months, then moved to the new house. Let see that was in, sixty-three, Dad had gotten a new job here in Sacramento, we moved from L. A. a month before school let out for summer and the new school said it was too late in the semister as they were going to be having final exams that I could not be ready for so they would use my transfer grades.

Yep, sis's room, mom n dads room down the hall, bathroom and, Wow, well what did I expect to see looking back at me, Ya, Me at fourteen, fifteen at the end of summer. Light brown hair, around five ten, one hundred twenty or so.

"Are you gonna be in there all day."

Yep, same ol sis, four years younger than me, let's see eleven, twelve at the fourth of july, ya, fireworks, that's her, I hardly have any memories of her until we were grown ups. We were very close, even more so going through Mom's losing fight with cancer.

"I'll be out after I shower."

"Well, hurry up and dont use all the hot water"

"He, He, I won't."

"Ya, right."

I do remember the hot water, who ever got into the shower first, well you just had to make sure all the hot water was gone before leaving the bathroom, right. Well, I guess I could start being a little nicer to her.

"There the bathroom's all yours."

Oh my, my little sister, she's so cute, long blonde hair, big blue eyes, she's a doll.

"Ewe, what are you doing?"

"Just wanted a hug from my kid sister is all, it's been a long time."

"Ah, ya I guess it has, but your gettin me wet."

"Well, your getting into the shower anyway arn't ya"

"Ya, but, mom wants some help in the garage so let me go, and no tickling, awwww, stop, let me go."

"Ok, see ya later."

Tormenting her was so much fun, well it was all in fun, see I really loved her, even when I was younger and older too. I guess, I was her protector, I remember a few times she would have trouble with boy's She always came to me, and I being four years older, well, the guy's got the message and spread it, no messin with my sis.

Sitting on my bed I couldn't help woundering when I was going to wake from this dream, It had to be a dream didn't it, Yea, well if it's a dream then I guess I can't really do anything wrong so I might as well not worry about it an have some fun till I wake up. You see I was always reserved and kinda shy growing up, and afraid of making any mistakes, some of that was from my dad, see when I was about Ten he had to go into the hospital, he had passed out at his work and the doctors told him he had a weak spot in a blood vessel in his brain. The doctors didn't expect him to make it out of the hospital, he did and lived another fourteen years before it ruptured and he died, but when he returned from the hospital the first time, he told me he was going to die and I was going to have to take care of my mom and my sister. Ten years old, shit I was scared, How was I going to take care of them, Work get money, well I did work from then on, with my mom when she had to get a job because dad was off work recovering, and I made sure to keep working whenever I could, not for the money as much as to be ready for when I would have to take care of them. So I was afraid, to make mistakes, Yea, when you have people to take care of.

But now in a dream it didn't matter if I made a mistake, Ha, I am going to either wake up or be dead right, so what the hell if I make a mistake, Pressure off go have fun, be a kid for a while, this can't be real anyway can it?

Time to go help Mom, walking outside seemed so different, maybe seeing more, looking around and seeing things I didn't when I was growing up, what a day, blue sky, sun shinning, warm already. The bounce in my step, strong legs, clean lungs, yea, later I took up the habit, smoking. I felt like I could run a mile with out weezing now. There's Mom with the mountain of boxes, Oh My God, so young thin, beautiful, little sister got her blonde hair and blue eyes, she's so, so, Hot looking, No stop that! she's your Mother, still at what, let's see, thirty-two or so and my eyes are fifty-five, Wow.

"Jim would you take those three boxes in for me?"

"Ah, sure, where do you want them?"

"The dining room would be fine"

"Ok."

"Jim are you feeling alright, your just standing there staring?"

"Ah, Yea Mom, I'm fine, it's just you look so beautiful this morning."

"Jim come over here, are you sure your feeling ok, let me check you for a fever, nope no fever, well anyway put those boxes in the dining room and I'll be in any make some lunch, you and sister both missed breakfast."

"Ok, thanks Mom."

I couldn't resist giving her a hug, even though I think she thought I was ill, after all it had been five years since our last hug and not at very plesant time.

"Hea sis what's up?" Her sly little smile always gave her away, especially when her hands were behind her back.

"Oh nothinggg!" She said that just before the attack, water pistol right in the face, good shot, there was a time when I would have gotten angry and holler'd at her, but this time it was time for her to meet the Tickle Monster.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, stop tickleing, I give, I won't do it again Let me up." Yea right, she got me two more to the face before screaming and running into the bathroom locking the door, just as Mom came in.

"I wish you wouldn't always pick on your little sister, why are you all wet?"

"Well it seem's your little angel found where the squirt gun was packed away, and she's probably reloading it right now in the bathroom."

"Sue open the door, give me the gun."

"Um, what gun mom?"

"The one behind your back, thank you."

"Mom, why did you do that, you got me in the face, I can't believe you did that."

"Payback, I should give it to your brother."