Chapter 1: Virginity Lost

Moving to Glendale this last spring really hurt me, I was starting tenth grade this year and I was not looking forward to starting all over again. I was one of the people that everyone wanted to be around, I had my 5 girl friends and we ruled the school; Junior High was fun and I was president of our class. When my mother got transferred to Hollywood I was sick and excited all at the same time. Excited that we were going to California yet I did not want to go through all the school junk again; I mean it takes time to make friends and be popular in school.

I used the summer to scope out my competition and I soon realized that unless I got connected real fast I was going to be very alone the next three years. The Friday before school started was the day to sign up for clubs; I signed up for everything after school that I could and still get my work done. While waiting to sign up for the Pep Squad I met Joyce and we began talking.

She pointed to one person then another telling me who was who and whom I should get along with. While speaking with her, she pointed out a very cute boy with a girlfriend of hers; they walked up and hugged.

Joyce introduced Cindy and him to me. "Kim, this is Jason, he is the hottest guy in school. He heads the chess club and every girl here wants to be his girlfriend, right now he doesn't have one, whoever gets him will be the most popular girl in school."

I could not believe my ears; I gave him my biggest smile he shook my hand. He asked me where I had been all his life and how he was going to keep an eye out for me. Jason walked away then Joyce said "He really knows how to treat a gal too, he and his friends all have money and they even have a kick back pad down the street from the school only the closest friends get invited there. You don't have any chance with him unless you're a virgin; he's never had any girlfriend that wasn't one. Are you a virgin Kim?"

I did not feel comfortable speaking of my sex life with a stranger but I was also proud of being a virgin when half of my class last year were not, I am speaking of only the girls. I don't think there were any boys are St. Steven's Jr. High. I told her I was a virgin and I was going to be one on my wedding night.

We talked a lot just before we were ready to leave Jason came back and invited us both to grab a soda. I wasn't in any hurry and I was going to do whatever it took to be Jason's girlfriend.

When school started on Monday Jason and I had spent almost all the weekend together doing different stuff, hanging around all the time he was a perfect gentleman. When I walked in with him for the first day, I was wearing his jacket and everyone treated me with respect; I was liked and I was the center of attention. Every time I came out of one of my class's there were one or two of my senior girlfriends along with Jason that walked me to my next class, I was sooo spoiled.

At lunch, we all went in Jacky's van to the Sizzler. Jason bought everyone lunch, we all hung around together between classes and when I finished the first club meetings, Jason was always there with Cindy or Joyce. It seemed as if I had known them forever we all got along so well. I felt proud to have this kind of friendship so fast and with seniors. And it was like that every day.

When my mother met Jason she was very impressed with him. She kept telling me how lucky I was to have such a nice young man as a boyfriend. She was happy to hear that he never, in the time that I had been seeing him, tried to make any kind of sexual advance on me. It was like that almost all week.

You see on Thursday night after school Jason picked me up and took me to dinner. My mother did not get off work until 9 and she always home by 9:30; he promised to have me home by 9.

From dinner he took me to lover's lane and we made out hot and heavy. When we began kissing, he was tender, caring not pushing. I melted in his arms. Oh I was really into it and I knew I could trust him. Jason put his hand on my breast and I pushed it away, he tried again and I pushed him away again. This happened three more times and finely I broke the kiss and told him not to touch me there.

He pulled back and got mad. "Look if I can't feel you up and touch you tell me now and I'll find another girl to be with, you make me feel good and I want to make you feel good in return."

I was hurt because this was the first time he had ever tried touching me and I never ever let a boy touch me on my breasts or my privates. I crossed my arms and said, "I am not that kind of girl."

Jason retorted "Well you are going to be one sorry girl with no friends at school if I dump you, you know. I just wanted to feel you up, that's all, I wasn't going to try and fuck you."

I thought to myself that I already had lots of friends at school because we had been together all week. I could make it now with out being his girlfriend, oh I liked him all right. I liked him a lot but I wasn't going to let him or any other boy feel me up no matter what. I knew it was over and I asked him to take me home that I didn't need a boyfriend that bad.

Without saying one word, he took me home and dropped me off. I went in the house crying. I was so glad that I made so many friends this first week. When Friday came and I walked onto campus everyone I said hello to turned their backs on me no one and I mean no one would talk to me.

I felt so alone. People that were my best friend yesterday before my date with Jason were now treating me as if I had the plague. I could not believe it. How could my breaking up with Jason affect all my friends? After school Cindy came up to me and told me what was going on, she said that if I wasn't Jason's girl friend, I was nothing but another sophomore and no one would talk to me. I was hurt but I knew I could make new friends so I just shined her on.

What I did not understand was why the people that I did not know before and that did not know me, would not speak with me. I was at my locker Monday right after Pep practice. I felt hands on my hips. Jason was behind me and he said "How bout being my girl again Kim, I miss you?" I closed my eyes; I thought to myself how miserable I was on Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and today. I liked him. Liked him a lot; I wanted to be his girl. If it meant letting him feel me up, I'll let him. I was tired of the silent treatment and besides it wasn't really sex.

I turned around and looked up at him. I said, "Sure, I'm sorry; let's not fight." He leaned down and kissed me and right there in the hall his hand went to my breast; he gently worked them and we French kissed. I was beyond myself. I could not think. There was a connection between my nipples and my vagina. I mean the more he touched my breasts and nipples the more my vagina became foremost in my mind.

It was like touching myself down there only better. I was enjoying the feelings without doing it. I guess that is the best way I can describe it to you. When he broke the kiss I could feel myself tingling between my legs and nothing had ever turned me on like that had. When he did stop kissing me, I felt as if a huge weight had been lifted off of my shoulders because I was loosing myself to the pleasure I was receiving.

We walked outside to the parking lot together and everyone was there, within just those few minutes everyone was my best friend again. It was almost creepy. We got in the van and off to the Jakes. (It is a kid's hangout that we all hung at.) We hung there awhile and then he asked me if I would like to see their clubhouse they called it the "crash pad." Everyone wanted me to go see it.

When we got there, he told me it was a place that he and his friends could hang after school; it had a bar and all kinds of snacks. He poured me a drink that he called "Comfort and Coke". We kissed passionately after everyone left. I let him work my breasts again, I hate to admit it, but I liked it a lot. I drank three more glasses of his "Comfort" mix. I think I had several tiny climaxes just with Jason kissing me and working my nipples.

I have been masturbating for about three maybe four years now and I loved the feeling of getting off. Jason was driving me crazy. He would stop kissing to take a drink just as I would begin a hard climax. I was so blasted turned on I was glad for the break because I knew I was going to loose it if he didn't stop.

After some time of doing this, Jason began to touch my thigh as we made out on the couch. I was so relaxed and it felt so good. I felt his fingers between my legs slowly moving up to my vagina. When he touched me, I wanted to feel his fingers in side of me.

He began to rub my clit and I knew that if he kept doing it I would climax and it would not be one of those tiny ones I had been having. It was going to be one of those great big ones that I have in my bed alone at night.

I closed my legs tight and said "No, please, I can't, stop please."

With my legs tight against his hand his fingers kept working my clit and I was right at the point that I was about to shudder in what had to be the hardest climax I'd had up to this point. I knew it was different, and it was going to be a dozy. I told myself that touching was not sex. I touch myself all the time so his fingers were not doing anything worse than what I did at night. In fact his fingers along with his kissing made the pleasure so much stronger. As I kissed him back I relaxed my legs and opened them just a little. I could feel it coming and I wanted it.

Just as I was going to scream into his mouth my pleasure, he stopped; he actually pulled his hand away and moved it back to my breasts. I moaned as we kissed and as we did, he laid back pulling me on top of him.

I felt his leg between my legs, my mound against his thigh. I began rubbing myself against him to see if I could get over the top and get that climax that was denied me. The closer I came to it the harder I rubbed myself against his leg. I was getting there fast and hard when I felt him lift me up, breaking contact. I could not believe I had been denied my pleasure again.

Jason nipped at my ear, "Let's go to the bedroom, we can do it there."

My head was spinning, I wanted to climax, was he thinking of intercourse? I can't do that.

I moaned "I can't, we can't"

Jason purred "I love you Kim, I want to give you pleasure, I want to show you how much I love you, you want to don't you?"

Jason stood up taking my hand he pulled me up on my shaky legs. He held me kissing me again; breaking the kiss he asked, "You know I love you don't you Kim?"

I looked up at him and said "Yes, yes, but I'm a virgin, I can't, we can't."

Kissing me I felt his hand between my legs again; I opened them to allow him to touch me. I wanted to feel his fingers rubbing my clit again, I needed his finger to get me off.

Jason had me humping back on his fingers as I raced to my desired climax. Just as I was there he pulled his hand back and I moaned as he broke the kiss and said, "Come, lets go into the bedroom so I can make love to you. You know you want to make love to me. I love you and I need to bring you pleasure."

He leaned down again and I kissed him; we began to walk and I broke the kiss. I stopped. I said "I want to, God I want to but I can't, I just can't."

Jason held me as he said, "Kim you know how much I love you; you know this is right; you were saving yourself for the man you loved; you love me right?" I looked at him and said, "You know I do; I do love you; you know that, but I can't!"

"Look Kim, I can't stand this torment, this torture, I needed to make love to you. If you don't, then I need to move on. I need to find the girl of my dreams; I thought you were my girl, I thought you were the one girl I would want to live forever with. If you are telling me you won't make love with me, then this has to end right now."

I was dying; I loved Jason he loved me. I wanted him he wanted me. I was saving myself for the man I loved. I was so confused my head was spinning and my mind was saying "NO!" My body was saying "YES!".

I whined, "I don't know, I'm not sure."

Jason reasoned, "Look Kim you want to be my girl right?"

I replied quickly, "Yes of course I do."

"Well then if your going to be my girl you have to trust me, do you trust me Kim? Do you trust me not to hurt you?" He pressured.

I told him that I trusted him and I knew he would not hurt me. He said "We are going in the bedroom and I am going to make love to you. You want that right?"

I said, "Yes, I do want that." He went on "When we finish we will be one! You and I will be one. Are you ready for me to make love to you Kim?"

"I think so, " I moaned."

I was so turned on I was squirming, standing in front of him trying to get my labia to somehow stimulate myself. He kissed me again and as I reached to touch him, to feel what a boy felt like between his legs, he broke the kiss and said, "Upstairs, let's go upstairs."

I was putty in his hands. I could feel myself full of desire. I had heard that making love was the best feeling on earth that only the very first time would be uncomfortable. I have to tell you, as turned on as I was then, it had to be way worse than loosing my cherry.

I heard a voice in my head yelling "NO!, NO!, don't go in there; you can't do this! He is going to hurt you! He will make love to you and drop you. Stay out of the bedroom and just kiss him."

That voice has always been there keeping me out of trouble and for the very first time I could hear myself arguing with it. "I don't care! I love him! He's my boyfriend he won't hurt me. He loves me!"

He guided me to the bed laying me down as he lay next to me. We kissed and he had his fingers working my vagina and clit. I moaned with pleasure and I could feel my pleasure racing back to me with even a stronger force behind it.

Jason broke the kiss and while fingering me he said "I need to tell you something, and I need you to promise not to never tell a soul; do you promise baby?"

I laid there looking at him, "Sure I won't tell anyone, I promise."

He brought me right to the point of coming and he pulled his hand away, He got up off the bed and pulled me with him. As he caressed my hair he said "I want you so bad, I can only do it one way. I have my reasons and if I don't do it this way I just I can't. I mean I, ahh, sort of loose it. I don't mean I get off early; I mean I loose my hard on. I need you to help me can you do that Kim?"

I looked up at his face I had no idea what on earth he was talking about but I loved him. I would do anything for him. I saw a little boy asking me for help. I said, "I'll do whatever you need me to do."

He sat on the bed and said "I was brought up different and I started with sex much younger, if I don't do it a certain way I just can't do it." All of a sudden I got scared. I thought maybe he was the kind of boy that has to hurt a girl in order to get hard and stay hard. Did he want to hurt me? I felt a cold shiver run through me as I sat there listening. When he stopped I asked him what he needed me to do.

He said "I want you so put on a blindfold so you can't see me; well it is more like two eye patches and I want you to put on some headphones while we have sex, that's is all. Can you do that for me Kim?"

I looked at him and had to ask why. He told me that having sex like that by shutting off one of my five senses and stimulating another like that increased my pleasure even more. My sense of touch would be much stronger as well as my sense of smell and my sense of taste. Besides, since I was a virgin and this was my first time the audio would help me learn what a girl says and does during sex and with the patches over my eyes I could not see and judge him.

I sat there thinking to myself that I wanted to watch his face as we made love; I wanted to hear him talking to me as he kissed me. I said, "I can do it, today, but will I have to do it all the time? I mean once we are comfortable together we can do it without that stuff right?"

Jason got all excited and began kissing me. "Sure," he said, "sure, yea, maybe after a few days I can try it with you with out the stuff. "We kissed again and when he stopped he got up, opened a drawer, and took out what looked like two eye patches on a leather string. Then he pulled out an MP-3 pocket player that had earphones. I was surprised how small the patches were but they fit right over the eyes and I could not see a thing.

Jason began kissing me again and feeling me up, I was still dressed but my blouse was now open and my bra was up on my chest allowing both of my breast freedom for his touch. Jason was right; I mean I swear my breasts were really sensitive and all I had on were the blinders (so to speak).

When we stopped kissing, I was so turned on I swear I had another tiny climax. Jason kissed my neck and worked his way to my right ear. He stopped kissing me and said real sexy. I'm going to put the ear speakers in your ears now; remember leave everything in place until we are completely finished. You do trust me don't you Kim?