What I did was wrong. I know that. You don't have to judge me, I take responsibility for my actions. I am not going try to make excuses. I simply want to explain how it happened. I want you to understand that it was an accident. It was an honest mistake. I did not realize what my sister was doing to me until it was too late. I've had some time to sort through the events of the past year, and there are so many things I would do differently if I could. To be honest though, there are some things I would never change. Some aspects that a part of me really enjoyed. I'd do it again.

My parents split up about 4 years ago when I was 16. My little sister was almost 15. Times were pretty tough. Mom had to work two jobs to make ends meet. When she was home pretty much all she did was sleep. My sister Susan and I cleaned the house, cooked the meals and took care of ourselves. We were always close, but after the divorce we became even closer. Susan was a sweet kid. She needed lots of affection, and my father's virtual abandonment hurt her deeply. Combine that with my mother's harried work schedule, and I was really the only one who paid attention to her, who listened to her stories, praised her accomplishments etc. I guess that's how it happened the first time.

I was watching TV when she came in the room and gave a loud sigh.

"What's wrong squirt?"

"Nothing re-al-ly... it's just, well I miss dad."

"I'm sorry honey but you know he's not coming back. Look I know he's our father but he cheated on mom, and cut us out of his life. Who needs him?"

"I know, but sometimes I miss him. The way I could sit in his lap and watch TV, and snuggle up. I felt so safe when he held me and told me that he loved me. It just hurts that I'll never have that again."

She looked so sad, so starved for attention that I wanted to help. Maybe it was because I was sitting in my father's chair. I had a visual of my sister sleeping in his lap, the way she had 100 times before.

"C'mere squirt, you can watch TV with me."

She seemed surprised at first, but then she giggled, and a smile lit up her pretty face. Susan quickly scrambled into my lap. I let the recliner out and soon she was pressed against the length of my body. I was super sensitive, and remember feeling every curve, every delicious warm, sweet smelling bit of my sister. I wrapped my arms around her as she rested her head on my chest. She gave a contented little sigh and her voice choked a little when she said, Thanks Jaz, I love you."

I don't know how long I held her that night. It started out innocently enough. I was just holding my little sister. I did not plan anything sexual. It is important to me that you understand it. I would never want my sister to think I took advantage of her that night. As we lay in that chair, wrapped in each other's warmth she fell asleep. Somehow her warm crotch shifted, and was covering mine. It felt so hot, I could feel it pulse and throb. I could barely breathe. I was so nervous. I looked at her, mouth open, sexy little drool making a wet spot on my shirt, and I HAD to have more. It was like it was another person's hand that began squeezing her breasts. First one then the other. I played with them for a long time. I took my finger and spelled my name across her body. First her tits, then on her thighs and crotch-"J--A--Z". Finally I was too horny to stop myself. I rolled Susan on my lap. Her face was on my chest, my dick was pressed in her groin (through our clothes) and my hands were on that sweet assmeat. I gripped her hard and held her tight. I lifted her in the air on my cock, thrusting, grinding into and felt her damp, warm crotch envelop me. I did not mean to cum, but suddenly I was squirting and jerking into my shorts as I played with Susan's juicy butt.

I know it was wrong, really I do but... well shit, she does not even know it happened, and we did have our clothes on so it really does not count. It was more than just masturbation, that cheapens it. When I look back, it had been a long time since I had felt safe, and secure. I don't know how to say this and not sound weird but, when a woman says she loves you, when she is pressed against you, her warm body is wrapped around you, well it does something. You really can't control it. A paternal, protective impulse grew inside of me.

After that first night, our relationship changed. I was the one she came to for comfort, for affection, for warmth. Like any father or husband, I wanted to take care of my woman. Susan was so glad to have an outlet for her loving side she did not restrict herself to the occasional chair-snuggle. When I came home she would usually meet me at the door. At first it was just to say hi, and to ask me about my day.

Then one afternoon she gave me an awkward, impulsive hug. I wanted her to be comfortable so I wrapped her in my arms and held her close for a few seconds. She felt so good, she fit me so snug. Then I kissed the top of her head and smiled at her.

"Thanks squirt, you always give the best hugs".

After that I got a big hug and snuggle as I came home every day. I have to be honest, it felt good. Knowing at the end of the day, Susan would be waiting for me. That I could hold her, and talk to her--felt right.

Some days I'd take her right to the chair and pull her down in my lap. I'd ask her about her day while hugging her, holding her, feeling her breathe. She was a lonely kid, and she poured her soul out to me. I enjoyed feeling her. I think she just got used to my cock pressing into her. It felt natural, to both of us. If my hands rested on the sides of her breast, or if her ass was on top of my hand--so what, neither one of us ever mentioned it. It was fun to pick her up and carry her around the house. Sometimes we wrestled, and I'd pin her. Other times I let her pin me. We were intimiate. My sister was my confidant, I enjoyed touching her body, interacting with her mind.

The kissing was a little different. At first it was a peck on the cheek. But then slowly I changed it into a litle more. As a joke one day I turned my head at the last second so she kissed me on the mouth.

"Mmm Squirt, you taste good".

My arms were wrapped around her and I held her tight for a minute. We both laughed a little, and she blushed. I was always complimenting her. I often told her how pretty she was, or if an outfit made her look attractive. Kissing was no different. Soon I made it part of our routine. One of us would pretend to aim for the cheek and the other would move their head to turn it into a quick lip kiss. We weren't making out, it usually only lasted about 5 seconds... but it was a boundary most siblings don't have the courage to cross. Let's review: I'd hold her, and hug her. She'd sit in my lap, press her breasts into me, say she loved me. Then we'd kiss and snuggle for hours at a time. While my hands rested on her tits and ass, and she pressed her cunt, mashed it into my cock. You tell me, how could I have helped it? I don't know exactly how or when it happened, but over time I began to spend more and more time with her. My little sister was my best friend, and in my mind more.

I've always enjoyed working out. I pretty much have to. I'm 6' 4" and big boned. If I stay in shape I look pretty good. If I goof off, and get lazy I balloon up. It's about a 20 lb swing but it's all in my gut, butt and cheeks. With beach season coming up I hit the weights, and began jogging. Susan was tall for a girl at 5ft 10 in but well proportioned. At 15, guys her age were usually too short for her. I think they were intimidated. Add in the fact that she was a good student, and more than a little naive, and sweet (goody goody), she was not very popular as a freshman in High School. She was determined not to give them anything else to pick on. So when I started working out seriously, she asked if she could join me.

We ran 5 miles, 3 days a week. Then alternated with free weights, and aerobics. Seeing my sister in shorts and a tank top, watching her breasts jiggle and bounce as she ran beside me was hard enough. But when she was soaked and sweaty, exhausted but with an endorphin enhanced smile--it looked like she had just had sex, and since she was working out with me, since I helped cause her state, it was kind of strange. Remember these realizations did not happen overnight. I just knew I thought she was sexy when she sweated, or ran, or stretched out.

One day after a long work out she cramped up. Susan was in a lot of pain in her lower back and thighs.

"Rub it out honey, you've got to massage it out, I instructed her.

"I can't reach it, it hurts Jaz help me!"

I did not think, as I laid her out flat on the basement floor where we worked out. I straddled her hips and began a slow deep massage. My hands pulled on her flesh and she groaned from pain and pleasure. I worked my way down her thighs and squeezed them long, and hard and slow. I rubbed her upper thighs for a good 5 minutes. She was moaning and groaning, slick with sweat, and I was straddling the hump of her beautiful ass. I felt myself get hard. My cock was nestled into her and it kept twitching as she writhed around under my massage. If she did not stop soon, I was going to cum.

"How does that feel squirt... good, now run upstairs and soak in the tub for a bit, and I'll make us some cold drinks." I helped her up and prayed my baggy shorts would help hide my erection.

"Thanks Jaz what would I do without you, she said as she gave me a quick kiss on the cheek".

About 10 minutes later I had some fruit slushies in hand, as I knocked on the bathroom door.

"Come on in, I'm parched, but I'm not ready to get out yet." I opened the door and was in for a surprise, Susan was in the tub completely naked.

I expected a bubble bath, or that she would be covered up somehow. She must have thought I would lay it on the counter where she could not be seen, and reach it after I was gone.

It was an honest mistake, after all she did invite me in. I could see her breasts, her delicious brown nipples. I wanted to suck them right then. I glanced through the clear water and got rock fucking hard instantly as I looked at her wet pussy. I knew it was wrong, taboo, forbidden but I wanted to fuck Susan right then. I wanted to pull her wet, sexy body out, spread her open, bend her over, and fuck my little sister till she screamed my name, till she came like a nasty little slut in heat. I'm not particularly PROUD of it, but that is how I felt.

It took her a few minutes to realize that I was standing there. She had her eyes closed and said "Thanks Jaz just lay my drink down on the side of the... JAZ! OH MY GOD!"

"Susan, I'm sorry I did not know, I'm so sorry!"

She tried to cover up, and I know I should have turned away"but I could not. Seeing her excited and wet, her breasts heaving, her thighs gliding together, I had to look. I could not help but to stare.

"John get out of here, I'm naked! Please leave, I'm naked!" She scrambled out of the tub and was blushing,

She grabbed her bathrobe off the hook and ran to her room.

I followed.

"Susan, open up, its me. Let me in. " She was crying. The poor kid was really upset. I did not wait for an answer and walked in.

"Susan you are my sister, it's ok. Don't cry baby. You have nothing to be ashamed of. It's no big deal," I said in a soothing tone as she cried into her pillow.

"That's easy for you to say".

Ok I'd prove it to her. Just to make her feel better I quickly stripped. After all "what's good for the goose..."

"Susan stop crying, look at me."

"(Gasp), Jaz... you're naked! "

At first I was so glad she had stopped crying that I did not mind her staring. Soon though I became self conscious. After all she had gotten a much longer look at me than I got at her. She was just laying there wrapped in her bath robe staring at me. Well, at my cock. I could not help it. I started getting hard again. It was not fair. Let's review. I had been horny ever since our run. Seeing Susan bouncy and sweaty always did that to me. Then I had pressed my cock into her ass, while giving her a massage. Next I see her naked for the first time. The tits I had imagined only in my dreams were beautiful, clearly they were made to be sucked. Seeing them wet from the tub, seeing her sweet, plump ass when she stood up, seeing those tender pussy lips peeking out at me as if to say "Hi!" it was just. Too. Much. Now I was naked, on display, and she was clearly enjoying herself. I decided to go for it.

"Susan, take that robe off if you are going to stare at me, I get to have a good look at your body. I want to see you again".

"Wh... no way, absolutely NOT. John!! "

Maybe it was because I had sort of replaced dad in her mind, but when I roared, "Get hat robe off right NOW!" her hands were shaking and she was trembling, and I expected her to obey me, It made me a little angry when she disrespected me. Still I think I surprised us both when I grabbed the robe and tore it off of her. She was naked. She was so naked. I pushed her down on the bed and stared at my little sister's body. She was too scared to move, and I fell in love with her right then.

" That's a good girl. I'm not going to hurt you but I need to see you. I'm just going to take a look. Susan, you are so beautiful."

Her brown eyes were staring back at me, tears dripping down her face, onto her neck and tits. They made her nipples wet, and salty, and tasty. How could I possibly resist? I crawled on top of Susan and began to lick and sniff and kiss her nipples gently. She was crying in shame and fear, and probably a little lust.

"Hold still baby, let me have them, Oh, oh god Susan you taste so fucking good," I said between sucks and licks, and long slow sniffs.

I really enjoyed playing with Susan's tits, they were puffy medium sized nips. Just a very fat handful. She is so warm and soft, I enjoyed rolling, and mashing her. If I squeezed them just right, a quick pinch and a twist she would let out this lady-like little "(gasp) Oh!". At first I was gentle but soon I was squeezing one hard while I nibbled and sucked her other one. Susan was sweating and shaking now. I have to admit I loved the control I felt. Playing with her breasts was a lot of fun, but I wanted more.

"C'mere baby sit up, we need to talk, "

She sat up slowly and had the nerve to try and be modest, to deny me my right to see her! Was my own sister trying to tease me?

As we sat on the side of her bed I realized it was time we be honest with each other.

"Susan, honey do you know why I did what I did, do you understand?"

"John it's ok, I know, it was a mistake, just an accident, I forgive you. I still love you., she said while hiding her tits and cunt from me.