Chapter 5

Rod plainly didn't believe me, but my challenge was too weird not to call what had to be a bluff. Would a young teen who had just been molested by his mother act as if he had been the villain? Well, maybe, but that would be getting ahead of my story. Rodney probably figured he could secure me at Wendy's for a couple hours while he confronted mom.

My brother preened briefly at Wendy's front door. He knocked, and after several seconds delay, Wendy's father appeared. The older man wasn't too happy with what he saw.

"This home hasn't had the pleasure of your company for some time, Rodney. Come on in, I can't let the neighbors watch me beat to death another kid who's gotten my daughter into trouble." Wendy's father didn't crack a smile.

I checked my brother. He ignored me.

"Yes sir, Mr. Palnasus. My brother's here to drag my body back home. Is Wendy here?"

"Yeah," Our doomsayer opened a space for us to squeeze through. "She helping her mother with dinner. Wait on the couch. I am pissed off, Rod, but I'm patient enough to hear your story. Tell a good one, and you can join us. Tell the wrong one, and you'll be first course."

We sat ourselves right down, eager to submit. If we had been dogs, we would have rolled on our backs. Rod answered, "I'm not going to lie, sir, but it was a crazy thing. I still don't know what happened, but this is what I saw and what I did..."

Rodney told a decent version of the fateful morning. As he related the events, he turned his head to me a couple times, and zapped me with a critical look, even though he never mentioned me in his tale. He was remembering just where I stood throughout his ordeal.

"Well, that's probably a load of horseshit, but Wendy believes you, and I've always found you to be forthright. You know if I catch a whiff of falsehood, later on, I'll ask the school to expel you." Mr. Palnasus reached for a tin on the coffee table. "Butter cookie?"

We both accepted. Wendy appeared in the archway to the kitchen, nearly as upset as her father.

"Dad, mother's being impossible. Oh, hi Rod!" She suddenly beamed at my bother. Then she resumed pouting at her father. "It's either her or me, choose."

"I don't want either of you. I never did understand who let women get into this house. Pest control wants a fortune to remove you both."

"Yes daddy,... and mom and I already spent your fortune. Get a new line." Wendy bounced over to Rod and promptly forgot her father. She flumphed down on my brother's lap.

"Miss me?"

"Excuse me, product of my sin, but you're still grounded lower than the circle of false prophets."

"Dad, but..."

"Kitchen or bedroom." Mr. Palnasus pointed a finger. "Go!"

This time, Wendy pouted for real. She got herself and her dander up and stamped out of the room. She didn't return to the kitchen.

"So, for what purpose do we have the pleasure of your visit today?" The head of the household asked as if he were the guardian of a temple.

"Uh, we were walking along and smelled the food here?" Rodney tried.

Mr. Palnasus sniffed purposefully. "Yeah, best meat pies on the block. I'll go see what the hold up is." He exited to the kitchen.

Rodney turned to me. "Take me to your girlfriend... !" He snorted my words back at me and shook his head. "Little bro, you'd better be the first meat pie, because I swear I'll eat you before he turns me into one." My brother had spent too much time in this house, listening to Wendy's dad.

An hour later, we had seated ourselves around a fairly small kitchen table. My left elbow brushed against Ms. Palnasus'. Her husband sat on my right, at the head of the table, and the two infatuants were allowed to sit side by side. Wendy's father kept a clear view of their laps, daughter at his immediate right.

"Should we say grace?" Ms. Palnasus asked when she finally sat down. The entire table had kept quiet until then.

"Sure," The high priest grinned and lifted his eyes heavenward. God, you've got no reason to listen to sycophants who can't live without believing in you, so I won't bother pretending, but these two lost boys probably could use a dose of your brimstone and hellfire. Don't worry about my daughter. She's already been sold to Satan."

"Daddy!" Wendy complained.

"Hortense, really!" Ms. Palnasus rebuked and lifted a dish. "Potato salad?"

"Yes, please." I smiled.

Rodney tried to act the adult. "I don't know much about religion, but if God's listening, I'm sure you made Him laugh."

"Yes, well, pass the gravy son." The father indicated a bowl steaming in front of my brother.

That thing I told you about, my elbow rubbing Ms. Palnasus. With her serving dishes across the table in every direction, my arm was continuously brushed, jostled, patted, and smoothed. I didn't have enough space between her and her husband to lean clear. Across the table, Wendy, who wasn't supposed to make eyes with Rod, found me a target ripe for teasing. She batted her gorgeous eyes and smiled her seductive smile. I even felt her feet trace my shin once.

I was blushing so hard I failed to notice the erection of one fine hard-on. Only when I found Wendy looking at me with a total blank did I jump up and excuse myself from the table. This wasn't what I had planned. A quick glance to my left found the mother in a similar confusion.

"Excuse you, son?" Mr. Palnasus raised his voice. "We just started to eat, and we all watched you take your business to the bathroom a few minutes before the chow bell rang. No adolescent food critic is going to insult my wife's cooking. Drop right back down there and sit polite until the rest of us are finished. Whether you eat or not is your business, but you will keep our company."