I was sitting on the couch with Darcy for whom I will baby-sit each night of the week for the next two weeks, while her mom's out of town. She's probably too old to need a babysitter at 14, but her mom's spoiled her rotten so she's quite immature and seems emotionally more like a 9 year old, but what the heck!

Besides, the money's good. I was struggling to better myself through community collage courses and though I'm not a snob, I had made a mental five year plan to ditch my repulsive white trash roots through hard work and determination for a life that I wouldn't be ashamed of.

We were just finishing up with a video, then came Darcy's predictable stalling to stay up one more minute! Since I was older and the babysitter, you can guess who won. <grin>

At least the Roths were very well off, so staying at their house was quite a treat! Mrs. Roth owned the string of Buyless stores that me and my mother happened to clerk at!

"Susan?"

"What punkin?"

"Don't call me punkin. Only mom can call me that. Beside's I'm too old to -"

"Quit stalling,... and get ready for bed!"

"Okay, But can I ask you one last thing?"

"Siiigggghhh... one last question. All right, what is it?"

"I overheard my Momma make a joke I didn't get. She was talking with some of her friends, and she was bragging about her employees who work under her and saying stuff like they'd probably work for lots less that she already pays them, then she goes on sayin' poor people are only happy when they're know their place and stuff. Then she said this dumb joke that made everybody laugh! Something like: "If your not the lead dog..."

"...the view never changes?" I sighed.

"Yeah that's it! What does that mean?" she asked.

"Well...Darc. (deep sigh) The saying just means that dogs aren't like people. They have a pecking order. There's a main dog, and others that follow. But unless you're that firrst doggie, all the second an third doga all have their... well...they're looking in up his, well...you know..." I stammered a bit.

"Oh...I get it. " She giggled finally.

"Right. And the lead dog, gets to look out and have a prettier view, since he isn't directly behind some other doggie buns."

"Yuck. I'd rather be the lead dog."

"Well, with your family, I wouldn't worry."

"Why were Momma and her friends laughing though?"

"I guess your mom was making a little joke about the people that work for her, that's all."

"You mean people like you and your mom?"

"Well, I'm sure she didn't mention me specifically. There are a lot of people who work at Buyless, right?"

"Yeah... But that still kind a mean joke, huh? I'm sorry Susan. Your family doesn't have any money?"

"No punkin, not like yours. But there's no need to feel sorry for us. Just because I wear a silly smock at Buyless doesn't mean I'm any less important that you or anybody else! Also remember, I'm older than you, so I get to do things like drive and stuff! So I get go anywhere I want without asking my mom and can date guys and earn my own money. See? There are trade-offs to not being super rich." I said, pinching her nose more to annoy her than out of affection...

"Yeah, but even when I grow up and can do all that stuff myself, won't you still be working at Buyless dressed in that stupid smock?" Darcy snickered, catching herself quickly with down cast eyes.

I frowned and a not grew in my stomach as I quietly looked down.

"Very funny. Goodnight Darcy."

I clicked off the light to her bedroom, I tried to pretend Darcy's dig didn't bother me, I really did. She was just a teeny-bopper after all, I reasoned. Why hadn't I mentioned my five year plan and that I wouldn't be like this forever? Because it's silly to justify myself to an immature teen, I reasoned, still blushing beat red at not defending myself anyway! So I sat there and fumed over the little brat's words until Mrs. Roth came home at 12:30! I was somewhat chilly to her mom after what I'd heard, but I wouldn't dare confront her about the joke or what Darcy told me.

As Mrs. Roth was getting my coat from the closet, a strange looking object with some funny looking plastic straps fell from the top shelf. Mrs. Roth smirked when I asked what is was. She said it was only some silly Halloween costume that Darcy had made for her last babysitter, as a joke, but the girl was unwilling to wear it.

"Don't be surprised if she tries to rope you into parading around in it someday." Mrs Roth winked and handing me my coat before stuffing the odd looking object into the back of the closet.

Sitting in my dumpy apartment and absent-mindedly stroking my Buyless smock, I ran Darcy's smirking comments over and over in my head! I was confused I didn't get angrier over Mrs. Roth's opinion of all us "little people" who work our tails off for her, let alone baby-sit her brat! Part of me wanted to quit sitting altogether, and another felt that I shouldn't be goaded so easily by silly gossip!

I knew myself to be above such stuff, and even if Mrs. Roth snickered behind my back at me and my background, that was her problem, not mine. Though I was only wearing my bra and panties, I put my smock on, looking myself over in the mirror. I hated what it represented and felt hurt and humiliated after what I now knew, and was puzzled to feel a familiar warmth down there, and I quickly pealed my the smock off and angrily threw it into my closet, fight back the tears.

Wasn't I just embarrassing myself for choosing to silently hang around the Roths if this is what they secretly thought of me? Plus would staying there only prove Barbara Roth's point that about people like me accepting their crumbs like they were pieces of pure gold?

I put it all from my mind and sunk off to sleep, resolved to forgive and forget.

The evening after that, I sat with Darcy and watched yet another movie.

"I'm sorry about what I said last night about you being grateful to be stuck at Buyless. It was rude, wasn't it?" Darcy said sounding more casual than repentant, munching on some popcorn and glued to the TV.

I made a face, thinking to myself. Darcy hadn't said anything about me being grateful! I shifted on the couch uncomfortably, feeling a familiar warmth in my secret spot again. Why would I feel that right now? I spoke to Darcy trying to impress her with how unruffled I was.

"Yeah, it was rude, but it's okay. You're younger, and I forgive you. Remember you've got to watch out for being a snob when you grow up, with all the privilege you have!"

"Susan...are you calling my mother a snob?"

"Huh?" my throat went dry.

"You were, weren't you? You just called me and mommy snobs!!!" her voice escalating in defensiveness.

"No I didn't! Uh...w-what I said was -"

"I know what you said. She won't like hearing about this when she gets home.

"Darcy, why are you being like this? Please honey - You know I didn't - mean to -"

Darcy suddenly turned off the TV with the remote and turned around, staring at me coldly. Now I knew enough about babysitting to know that if I showed weakness now, I'd never get her respect back. I had to calm her down without losing face.

"Susan, sit up! On the edge of the couch..."

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me. Sit upright close to the edge, like I said."

There was a tense few moments, but I figured whatever it took to calm her down. Maybe she'd forget about it by the time Mrs. Roth got home! Reluctantly I did as she asked, but I folded my arms to let her know she's might be in trouble for such cheekiness!

I pulled myself so my butt was perched on the edge of the couch as she got up off the couch and stood before me, my face a few feet from her belly.

"Okay, I'm here. What now...?" I said in a firm voice.

Darcy reached into her pocket and held up tiny paper envelope to my face, with a smug look.

"I told Momma what we talked about last night, and Momma told me to offer you what's in this envelope, in exchange for whatever I ask you to do! Momma said that even though you'll resist and complain, by evenings end you'll take me up on the offer, if you wanna keep your job."

I smiled. Somebody just played their hand, and lost. Nice try though.

"Darcy,...somebody's telling fibs. Your mother would never say something like that.

For a moment, her face seemed to fall, as if she hadn't expected me to see her coming. Then her smug smile returned.

"Are you prepared to lose you job sitting for me...if you're wrong?"

I sighed, dropping my folded arms to my side. I wasn't of course, but I couldn't let her know that.

"Besides...aren't you curious what's in the envelope Momma left for you? Not even just a little? Could be a check? A folded twenty? Or a fifty? Maybe more? Anything! All waiting just for you..."

I reached out for the envelope, but Darcy stepped back a few feet out of reach And I instantly realised I'd allowed too much interest to play innocent anymore.

"Nuh huh huh...only if you earn it!" Darcy said, all smiles, shaking the little envelope a few feet before me as I stared daggers at her.

I sighed "Okay, not that I'm agreeing to even playing this game! - but assuming we were, what would the price of me getting that silly envelope?"

"I dunno...maybe I get to...er...I hold my rear up to your face... for 3 seconds, and...you don't pull away!" She giggled, proud of herself for the guts to say it aloud.

I frowned, trying to hide my mirth. This was it? For a fourteen year old girl, she sure acted like a four year old sometimes! This was grade school stuff, but I was curious about what prize Mrs. Roth had left for me. I could see Mrs. Roth's handwriting on the envelope, so I knew it really was from her.

This game was just Darcy trying to tweak me a little. And, as long as no one saw us, It was probably worth it, as humiliating as the idea was. The act meant nothing. She was wearing jeans, so it was just a spoiled teen's idea of embarrassing her babysitter, that's all.

That's what I told myself, as I Ignored that familiar feeling again. I took a deep breath and called her over.

Hours later, after our little game and I'd put Darcy to bed, I remembered Mrs. Roth wouldn't be coming home this evening, only her maid. After The maid came home and didn't hand me a payment, I knew Darcy was telling the truth. I refused to give Darcy the satisfaction of opening the envelope in front of her, so as I walked home leaving Darcy's large beautiful house behind me, I opened the envelope and found Mr. Roth's letter inside, which I nervously read:

"Dear Susan,

"Opening this means you've done as my daughter asked, I am pleased you accepted Darcy's offer. Contained in the envelope is the exact the amount you are worth for having accepted such an offer...

I quickly fumbled to open the tiny envelope and found nothing but... a single penny.

By stomach did flip flops and my fists clenched into a ball and my face burned with humiliation, but not at Darcy, or even her mother. The anger was at myself. I forced myself to continue reading.

"Starting now, your will no longer be paid your usual 17.50 an hour to baby-sit my daughter. Instead, you will be paid the amount in envelope we give you each evening! Tonight, you will take this penny home and place it in a secret spot for one hour.

"I think we both know where this spot is, don't we?

"You will then remove your special penny and place it on a dresser next to your bed. You will then worship this little penny of yours by staring at it each morning and evening, as you think of me and my daughter. You may never remove it from it's new home, because it came from me and my daughter, and it is special.

"Love,
Mrs. Roth"

I stared at the letter with a huge ugly knot in my stomach and a hot moist little wet feeling growing in my gut. I was burning with shame that Mrs. Roth goddamned well knew about what Darcy had me do!!! Blood rushed to my face as I struggled to keep from crying. I stared down at the penny in my hand, my payment for sticking my nose in her daughter little butt!

I chucked the penny across the road, and tore up the letter!

I stormed home in a daze!!! How could Mrs. Roth be so cruel? After how hard me and mom had I've worked in her stupid store for the last three years, not to mention looking after that spoiled brat of hers??? Barabra Roth was just humiliating me, and people like me, who having to work for a living! In my mind working elevated me! At least I earned what I had, and wasn't born into being an overeducated asshole, I fumed angrily!

I swallowed hard resolving never set foot in their house again! However, my resolve disappeared and I felt queasy at the thought that my little Darcy might have actually read this disgusting penny stuff her mother wrote to me. If so, then I could kiss her ever respecting me again goodbye. I did care about what Darcy thought about me. I still had something to prove to her, I guess, and didn't want to leave her with this repulsive and an image of her babysitter.

It took me half an hour to walk home,

Twenty minutes to sulk,

And another half hour to walk back and get on my knees to find the penny.

I did it in a daze. I knew it had to be that exact penny too! I wanted it so I could confront Darcy with it. I was sure, after thinking the whole thing trough, that Darcy would be as horrified as I was, and confront her mother, and we could talk the whole thing out.

I found it at the same spot where I'd thrown it, still sitting there in the road, with pieces of the torn up letter around it. I smiled at how shiny it was and then felt instantly stupid. But I picked it up anyway and gathered the pieces of the note so I could prove what it said to Darcy, who would never believe such words from her mommy without proof.

That night I studied the crumpled - taped together letter sitting next to the penny. I frowned as I realized I'd placed in on the dresser next to my bed as the note said to, but reasoned that it was simply the most practical place to stare at my new penny.

However, there was no fucking way I was going to do anything obscene with it, no matter what the note said.

I cried a lot that night, confused and puzzled by why I'd gone back for it. I knew that neither Mr. Roth or Darcy would know if I was actually doing as they'd asked. No one would know but me. I could just say I did, right? I didn't wanna feel proud of my new penny, as I earned it in a stupid humiliating way, and I was clearly being insulted by taking such a drastic pay cut!

I just needed to talk to Mrs. Roth directly about it, to straighten all this out. I needed this money to babysit. This was 17.50 sometimes three times a week, and that was too much to give up without a fight! I would also hide this gruesome side of Mrs. Roth from her daughter. I believe Darcy knew nothing of the actual amount, in fact she speculated it could be a fifty dollar bill I remembered! Why not let her believe this, as long as could get Mr Roth to agree to hide my secret. Darcy was just teasing me with her hiney games. Quite harmless really. I had to protect Darcy, plus preserve my dignity in order to continue sitting for her.

The next morning I spent some time looking at my penny, ate breakfast, then dragged myself through work, dreading that evening babysitting Darcy, but excited about talking Mr. Roth back into me collecting my usual 17.50! In fact I was sure that the envelope would contain just that, and I would play along with Mrs. Roth's weird little one time joke, putting the lurid section of her letter out of my mind altogether!

That evening, I was disappointed when Darcy said Mrs. Roth wouldn't be home again, and in fact, would be working late every night this week! I pouted as we watched yet another silly movie while Darcy devoured popcorn that I'd made for her.

"Okay, you know what time it is, right Susan?"

Darcy reached into her pocket and held up another tiny envelope to my face, with a excited look, eyeing me carefully.

I forced a polite smile back at her.

"Okay, but if I agree, you promise to mind me and not be a pain otherwise?

"No way. You've gotta do your little trick for me first! Then your reward is the envelope. I do what I want, as usual."

My face flushed over her words little trick, but I screwed down my anger over the tone she'd used with me and continued.

"Darcy, right now it's just a game, but what your doing is not very nice. If I told you I didn't really like this game and it really deeply bothered me and was starting to hurt my feelings, wouldn't that make you feel bad inside?