Chapter 4

I plowed through midterms the following week. I was very comfortable with the tests and thought I had done very well. I talked to Rachael on the phone a couple of times but she was still distracted with her own midterms. Winter break started for us on the fifteenth of December and Rachael came down on the seventeenth for a week. She was flying out on the twenty-third to spend the holidays with her family in Rhode Island. Rachael told me that reconnecting with her family made her very happy. We spent most of the time she was home together. We Christmas shopped, hung out at my house and went out at night. Rachael was my date to three Christmas parties. One of the parties was a fancy to-do that my mom’s work threw.

The NASA party was at the Officer’s Club at Cape Canaveral. Rachael and I rode down to the party with Mom and Dad. Katrina didn’t go to the party. Instead she was at one being thrown by Josh Turner’s aunt and uncle at their ranch. Josh had some seriously famous relatives; his uncle was Jake Turner, the former president, his mother Angela was the President and CEO of the Turner furniture and appliance empire.

I was wearing a new suit for the NASA shindig. I was five-ten by then and a solid one-seventy-five. I had outgrown my other two suits. Rachael was wearing a shimmery jade green cocktail dress that fit her like a second skin. She looked beyond fantastic. The party had a live band that was damned good. Rachael loved to dance so we spent most of the evening on the dance floor. The music and dancing really brought her to life; she literally glowed with happiness.

Rachael and my physical relationship moved forward during that week as I built on the experiences I had with Michelle. I went very slowly with Rachael, always aware of her fragility. I had noticed with Michelle, and now with Rachael, that I was very attuned to what they were feeling. I have always been sensitive to people and since I hit puberty that awareness seemed to be magnified. As I spent more intimate time with Rachael I was able to hone my sensitivity to the point where I instinctively knew how to keep her receptive to what I was doing.

On the day before she departed, Rachael said she just wanted to hang out with me at her house. I rode my bicycle over there with the presents I’d bought her for Christmas. Rachael greeted me at the door in a green plaid miniskirt topped by a red sweater. She liked it when I told her she looked cute and Christmassy. Rachael was really into the whole Christmas thing, so we were soon on the couch snuggled under a comforter watching a Christmas DVD she’d bought. I was lying behind her on the couch; her head was resting in the crook of one of my arms the other around her holding her to me. As the movie progressed I slipped my hand under her sweater palming her breast. Her breast fit my hand perfectly. Not surprising, I guess, when you consider that Rachael opted for the implants she had based on my description of the size I liked.

When the movie ended Rachael turned off the television. She stayed nestled in my arms, her hand lightly stroking the arm I had under her sweater.

“I love being in your arms, Johnny. It’s the one place in the world I feel safest.”

I murmured my agreement.

“Lets go to the bedroom so we can be more comfortable,” she whispered shyly.

We were breaking new ground here because I’d never been in her bedroom. I untangled myself from her and helped her to her feet. Then impulsively, I swept her into my arms and set off for her bedroom. She gave a startled gasp when I picked her up, then sighed and wrapped her arms around my neck. When we got to the bedroom I swept back the covers and deposited her in the center of her bed. Her arms remained firmly locked around my neck so I was leaning awkwardly over her.

“Johnny you keep doing things and doing things that make me feel so good. And every time I think I can’t feel any better you do something else,” she whispered fiercely.

I pried her arms loose and lay down next to her. She turned to face me and our lips came together in a kiss so achingly sweet it took our breath away. Rachael didn’t make a peep when I pulled her sweater over her head and unfastened her bra. When I attached my lips to her nipple, her hand came up and she held the back of my head. Her nipples were as perfect as her breasts, small pink nubbins centered on quarter sized areola. Her nipples were sensitive and she gave a little moan as I moved from one to the other, my tongue trailing down into the valley between her breasts. I spent a long time gently worshiping her upper body. When I felt she was ready for more I moved my hand down and slowly ran it up her thigh.

Rachael clamped her thighs together but she didn’t stop me from touching her. I moved up to kiss her again as I softly stroked her thighs. In time, I progressed up to where I was lightly stroking her mound through her panties. After a few minutes of gentle rubbing she groaned in surrender and her thighs fell apart. As I slipped my fingers under the leg band of her satin high cut panties I couldn’t help but compare how much wetter she was than Michelle. Rachael was soaked and she gave off this intoxicating musky aroma.

I easily slid one finger into her wetness; she rolled her hips up eagerly taking more of my finger. I sawed my finger gently in and out of her and her moaning grew in volume. I upped the ante again and started tugging her panties down. She raised her hips to help. Off one leg then the other the silky panties came. Golly, were they cute little things, those panties. They were green satin and lace and matched her bra down to the little satin bows on the side. My girl liked green and the color was perfect for her. Her make over didn’t extend to her pubic hair. It was nicely trimmed but was a dark blonde color.

With the barrier of her dainties dispensed with, I wasted no time in burying my face where that wonderful odor originated. Suddenly Rachael started frantically pushing my head away.

“Stop it Johnny, I’m all wet and nasty down there.”

I looked up at her incredulously.

“You’ve got to be kidding! I love it that I make you wet, and you smell so good! I want to taste you, too.”

She looked at me dubiously but her death grip on my hair relaxed a little. I went back to doing what I wanted, happily exploring what felt good to her. Again, unlike Michelle, she was vocal in her appreciation. Hot damn, I loved to hear her moan and babble my name! When she came she gave a squeal and went rigid, then started pumping her hips furiously against my face. Her gyrations caught me by surprise and she split my lip against my teeth. Rachael wasn’t multi-orgasmic, she pushed my head away and curled up on her side. Not knowing what else to do, I pulled the sheet up over her, moved up on the bed, and held her. Can you imagine how surprised I was to feel her sobbing against me?

“What’s the matter, Rachael?”

“That was so good and so sweet, Johnny. It was the strongest climax I’ve ever had. I guess I’m just overwhelmed is all.”

What guy doesn’t like to hear that? She sniffled then giggled.

“You still have all your clothes on, get naked and get under these covers with me.”

I jumped out of bed and stripped, conscious of her eyes on me. When I was buck assed I stood up and faced her. I wasn’t real shy about my body like she was but I was a little apprehensive about what she’d think. After all, unlike Michelle, I wasn’t the first guy she’d seen naked.

“You have a nice body and penis,” she said. God, did she sound formal.

“Kong,” I corrected.

“Kong?”

I pointed down to where my dick was waving in front of me.

“Him, his name is Kong.”

Her eyebrows went up and down and she giggled.

“You named your penis?”

“Sure, he’s a dick sometimes, but he’s my best friend. He’s got a couple of other friends, but they’re both nuts.”

She was laughing now as I hoped she would. She swept the covers back and patted the bed.

“You and Kong better get in here with me, we wouldn’t want him to get a head cold.”

We cuddled and kissed and fooled around until my balls ached from all the stimulation. Finally Rachael grabbed Kong and pulled me towards her.

“I want you in me, Johnny. I want to make love.”

“Let me get some protection,” I said.

“No need for that unless you feel safer with a rubber. I’m still on the pill, it helps regulate my periods.”

Then I had to swallow my nerve and fess up.

“Umm, this is my first time Rachael and I’m really, really horny. I’m not gonna last long.”

She nodded solemnly. “I am honored to be your first. Now come on, let’s get the first one out of the way, so we can have fun.”

As advertised, I came within a few strokes of entering her. But Kong, bless his heart, stayed hard and we could continue. Rachael was hot and wet and very slick, especially after I came in her. Intercourse was just as good as I ever dreamed it would be. Rachael didn’t climax the first two times we did it but after a shower and a marathon round three she huffed and moaned and even screamed to a crashing orgasm. We stayed in bed all day playing around, I loved going down on her so I did that a lot.

We talked, too. She told me why she was so amazed by our lovemaking. Jesse, her ex, had a big dick and some sick ideas about how to treat a woman.

He made fun of how wet she got, calling her a slut and worse. He’d make her douche then he would cram himself into her when she was mostly dry. He liked the friction and got off on hurting her. I sincerely hoped that some big guy named Bubba was giving Jesse a taste of his own medicine up there at the penitentiary in Stark.

I went home in time for my midnight curfew. Rachael saw me out the door with a kiss. She was wearing a loosely belted black silk kimono that made me not want to leave. She told me how great the day had been and how much she loved the necklace I gave her for Christmas. She said she was going to miss me and she couldn’t wait until we could be together again.

This is how much she missed me. Three days after Christmas she called me.

“Johnny, I don’t think we should see each other any more,” she said.

Just like that, no how are you, no how was Christmas, just, “Johnny I don’t think we should see each other any more.”

I disagreed with that completely and told her so.

“We’re getting too serious, Johnny; and you’re too young. I don’t want to ruin your life. This is the way it has to be.”

“What do you call what you are doing now if it’s not ruining my life?” I argued.

She was crying now and I was, too.

“I’m sorry, Johnny, I really am.”

Then she hung up.

Happy New Year, Johnny Pulaski!

I think people have always thought I was mature for my age because I didn’t talk much. I never talked much because, like my father, I was a basically a shy person.

When I hit puberty I thought I could change that and it would help me with women. Well, those days were over. I withdrew into my room and spent the rest of the holidays seeing how miserable I could be.

My folks tried to talk to me but my dad was helpless in his own shyness and my mom was ill equipped to deal with a heartbroken teenage boy. She was a relentlessly pragmatic problem solver but the problems she excelled at didn’t involve relationships.

Even the Moose took a stab at it. But Katrina had thought all along that this is where my relationship with Rachael would end.

I was morosely studying calculus on the Wednesday after school restarted, when my grandfather came into my bedroom.

“Come with me, Johnny.”

“I have to study, Papa,” I protested.

He tossed me my jacket. “That wasn’t a request,” he said.

We went out and got in his truck and he drove us out to a state park about ten miles from the house. Once at the park he let Jethro out of the truck and put down the tailgate. He sat down and patted the metal. I sullenly flopped down beside him. For a minute all we did was watch Jethro tear around the park, running full bore in great looping circles. Jethro ran with joyful abandon, his huge ears streaming out behind him, his oversized tongue lolling out of his mouth. My grandfather fired up his pipe and started talking.

“I’ve lost a lot of people in my lifetime, Johnny: my parents, my brother, my sister and scores of brothers in arms. I think about them a lot. I mourned their passing then got on with my life. It was never easy but I cinched up my rucksack and moved out.

“It’s time for you to do the same thing. Time to end your little pity party and rejoin the living. You are a Pulaski and that’s what we do. Now talk to me.”

So I told my grandfather the whole story, my voice breaking on occasion as I relived my hurt. He didn’t say anything other than an occasional “go on” to keep me talking. When I finished my story he knocked his pipe out on the heel of his hand and repacked it with tobacco.

“I know that this is probably not what you want to hear, son, but that girl did a lot for you. And she did it when she was fragile and vulnerable. Don’t judge her too harshly, she’s carrying a bigger load than you can imagine.”

I took my grandfather’s words to heart and tried to get on with my life. I started working out again with Stan and Richie, although now that Richie had a license he was a frequent no-show.

I talked to Michelle once in a while but I really had to force myself to do it. I was reverting to my old tongue tied self and couldn’t seem to stop the skid.

School was just a way to fill my days as I went mechanically through the motions of socializing and learning. Then things took a radical change in early February.

The cause of the change was a girl in my biology class. Her name was Caroline Hernandez. Caroline was smart. She was pretty. And she was painfully shy. She was the oldest of seven children and her being in high school was an iffy proposition because her family was strapped financially. Caroline was already baby-sitting as many as five nights a week to help out her family. Caroline and I weren’t friends but we were nodding acquaintances because we also had the same homeroom and study hall.

I was on my way to social studies when I remembered that I had left my book in my locker. I resigned myself to being late and veered down the corridor to pick up my book just as the bell rang. I turned the corner and almost ran into a very frightened Caroline trying to pull her arm out of the grasp of an older looking Latino guy. He was saying something to her in Spanish and she was violently shaking her head. I pulled up short.

“This guy bothering you, Caroline?”

The guy spoke before she could. “Get lost, Dude, this ain’t none of your business,” he said.

I looked the guy over; he was about my size and wore the typical gangster uniform. He had a cruelly handsome face with medium length thick black hair. His fists were clenched; L-O-V-E was tattooed on the knuckles of one hand, H-A-T-E on the other.

“Then let her go, so it can keep being none of my business,” I said.

“If I let her go it’s gonna be so I can kick your ass,” he snarled.

I hadn’t been in a fight since a playground dust up in the sixth grade. My father and grandfather taught me how to defend myself. Fights just didn’t seem to happen to me.

“You don’t want to throw down here in the hall or we’ll both get suspended. You let her go and you can explain it to me in the park behind the church after school,” I said.

He shoved Caroline away from him and barked something at her in Spanish. She scampered away in fright as he turned back to me.

“I’ll be there,” he said. “I’m gonna enjoy fucking up your pretty white boy face.”

The confrontation happened between fourth and fifth periods so I only had two hours before I was out the front doors and walking toward the park. Caroline was waiting on the sidewalk for me, her eyes brimming with tears.

“Don’t go over there, Johnny,” she pleaded, “Arturo is mean and he will hurt you.”

I shrugged, “If I don’t go he’ll just find me somewhere else. Might as well get it over with now. You go on home and tell your folks about him.”

She started to say something then spun around and left.

As I walked the two blocks to the park I thought about why I didn’t do more to defuse the situation with Mr. Arturo. I could have I was sure. But I think the truth was that all the anger I felt at Rachael jilting me made me unconsciously spoiling for a fight.

When I got to the park there were at least fifty kids there with more arriving by the minute. Word of the fight had spread like chicken pox. Arturo was standing with a couple of guys who could have been his clones when I walked up. I dropped my book bag and stood waiting for him. Arturo ambled over and took a boxers stance in front of me.

Arturo didn’t waste any time as he flicked a jab at me and began circling to my left. It didn’t take me long to figure out that I was way over my head as he snapped off a lightning fast two punch combo that rocked me on my heels. Then he threw a flurry that left me sitting on my ass with a bloody nose.