Chapter 2

I really hope not too many people find out about me peeing my pants, -- Arnold thought as he sat next to his sister as his father started the car. Why does Lexi always find ways to humiliate me?

zjuzzjuzzjuzzjuzzjuzzjuzzjuz -- the tires spun on the mud as the car refused to start.

“You know, you don’t have to embarrass me at every opportunity” said Arnold.

Vrum vrum vrum George revved the engine.

“Ya, I kind of do” countered Lexi, “It’s my job as the little sister”

zjuzzjuzzjuzzjuzzjuzzjuzzjuz went the tires.

“Didn’t know that was part of the job description” Arnold replied

“ah-ha” Lexi responded with a nod and a pretty smile.

Vrum vrum vrum vrum - the wheels continued turning but the car wouldn’t start.

“Arnold. I’m really sorry but I’m going to need you to get out and push the car while I’m on the gas pedal, the car is stuck in the mud.” said his father.

“What? Why me?” asked Arnold “We should all push.”

“Don’t be silly Arnold, then everyone would get covered in mud” explained Mindy.

“So it’s better if just I am covered in mud?”

Lexi smiled widely: “much better” she mouthed silently to her brother. She loved where this was going.

“Of course son, why should we all have to get covered in mud?” replied his mother.

“Well why can’t Lexi do it?” he asked.

Lexi just shook her head slightly as if to say don’t try to put this on me, you know I’m mom and dad’s favorite.

“Don’t be ridiculous Arnold” said Mindy “why should she have to ruin all her clothes for nothing?”

“Ya, son, now you’re just being silly” said George.

“How is it being silly?”” Arnold demanded angrily “why should I have to ruin my clothes?”

Lexi smiled and wagged both of her index fingers back and forth while rotating her shoulders in a kind of mini happy-dance. It was the kind of cringe-inducing display that would normally look ridiculous and silly but when preformed by someone as confident and good looking as Lexi, managed to look almost cool.

“Arnold” said his mother, in exasperation “your clothes are already ruined, remember when Lexi poured that water on your pants? There’s no sense in mucking up Lexi’s clothes too”

“Besides” said George “maybe if you jump out of the way fast enough, none of the mud will get on you. Think of it as a fun challenge.”

It didn’t sound like much fun to Arnold.

“I’ll certainly have fun watching” Lexi said through a giggle.

“That’s the spirit!” said Mindy, “off you go, Arnie-boy!” she said. Lexi chuckled at the wince her brother gave at that babyish nickname as he reluctantly got up and left the car, making sure to leave his wallet and phone inside to prevent them from getting dirty.

Arnold got out behind the car and pushed as George put his foot on the gas. If I can just jump out of the way as soon as the car starts moving, maybe I can avoid the mud splatter.

Arnold looked to his left, making sure he had ample room to jump. His eyes were glued to the tires, so he would be able to notice the slightest bit of rotation and jump that second. He pushed, ... pushed ... got ready to jump, ... and ... Bloomp! SPLAT! Fell face first into the mud as the car started to move. He didn’t jump in time. Not even close.

Before Arnold even managed to stand up, Lexi jumped out of the car and walked over, laughing like crazy.

“Yes! Oh my that was awesome, you look so stupid” she chirped as she smiled broadly. Slowly standing up, Arnold could barely see his sister’s face with all the mud in his eyes. But he knew she was smiling. Her attitude was so infuriating. Being covered in mud on top of his piss-drenched clothes was bad enough, did she have to rub it in by enjoying it so much?

“Oh my, I have never seen anyone so muddy” Lexi continued as she walked up to her brother, wide eyed, her perfect hair billowing lightly and gorgeously in the wind.

Now their mom came out too, and even she was smiling “wow” she chuckled “so sorry you had to do that” she said with a laugh, not sounding sorry at all

Even Mom is acting like this is all a joke? Arnold thought in anger. It made him want to scream. It made him want to jump in her face and yell at them to have some God damn compassion and just treat him like a f**king human being. But Arnold was much too non-confrontational and naturally submissive to do any of that so he just stood their awkwardly while his Mother chuckled and his sister laughed out loud joyfully.

“Alright,” said his mother after composing herself “back in the car, were unstuck now”

“Hold up” said their father, George as he came out “Arnold is not getting in the car like that”

“What do you mean?” asked his wife, Mindy

“He will get mud all over the car. That will take forever to clean.”

“So ... what should I do?” asked Arnold.

“The hotel in only a couple of miles away, you can walk”

Lexi cutely stifled a surprised little chuckle at how bad this seemed to be going for her brother.

“WHAT THE F*K! YOU EXPECT ME TO WALK LIKE THIS IN THE HEAT! NO F*KING WAY!” Arnold wanted to scream.

But instead, he meekly and timidly asked: “Just ... what like ... walking? Like alone on the highway?” with much trepidation. He was such a wimp.

Meanwhile, Lexi kept smirking as she watched the exchange.

“No, honey, you can take the side streets.” his father explained “We’ll follow you in the car so you won’t get lost.”

Lexi smiled at the look of pure horror on her brother’s face.

“Once we get to the hotel, you can wash off by the showers at the beach.” George continued

“So ... so ... I have to walk for miles ... in the heat? ... while you all get to relax in the air conditioned car?”

“I like this plan” said Lexi

“Ya, it makes sense,” said Mindy.

And so George, Mindy and Lexi all got back into the car.

“wait! Guys come on don’t ... no ... I can’t walk 3 miles...”

“Bye bye Arnold” waved Mindy as she got inside.

“see ya latter” said Lexi as she closer her door.

“guys, no ... this isn’t fair ... no...”

George ignored his son and started driving.

... Arnold scrambled to keep up. He had to run a bit at first to make up for the time he spent standing there with his jaw dropped.

“Getting tired there son?” asked George after a few minutes to his son who was keeping pace with the driver’s window.

“Yes, please can you let me in?” Arnold. “oooo kaay, fine” George answered reluctantly. George stopped the car and Arnold went to the back to open the door. But just as he reached the handle his father slammed the petal again and the car speed up forward another 50 feet or so till it slowed to a walking pace again. George, Mindy and Lexi couldn’t stop laughing as Arnold ran again to meet the car

“Gotchya” said George once Arnold caught up again and the whole family laughed again. Arnold’s sad pouty face was just too funny.