Chapter 7

I woke up at Seven the next morning with mixed feelings. On one hand, I felt like shit because my whole torso hurt. I accredited it to the fitful sleep I got whenever I dreamed of Tess. On the other hand, the muscles in the rest of my body felt strangely relaxed. I actually had to check and make sure I didn’t come in my pants while asleep. To my amazement, I noticed my shorts were missing, but I was so beat the evening before, I couldn’t remember if I even put them on after I overexerted myself in the bathroom.

I slowly - very slowly - got dressed while checking the bandaids for blood. Then I carefully made my way downstairs to the kitchen. Normally, I’d just grab a Coke from my fridge in the morning to satisfy my caffeine and sugar needs, but it was missing from the room. After I moved out, someone probably took it for themselves.

When I stumbled into the kitchen while holding my stomach, Ava, Claire, and Aaron were already in it. The grandparents were probably still sleeping, and Logan was probably still running away. Aaron noticed me first, lowered his newspapers, and wished me a good morning. That alerted the others of my presence.

While Ava looked up from her cereal to give me a short and somewhat shy greeting herself, Claire’s reaction was kind of unnerving. Her body froze while her head snapped up, and she looked at me with big, sad, and somewhat reddened eyes. The dark rings underneath those eyes gave me the impression that she didn’t sleep much last night. Once again, she looked like she wanted to say something, but couldn’t decide on what or how. I felt my suspicion from the previous day confirmed. It was just like the last few times. Eventually she would get over her guilt, and I’d hear her and Logan make the beds squeak again.

When I reached up to the cabinet to get myself a cup for the coffee, I grunted as the pain shot through me and stilled my movement. Immediately Ava jumped up and took a cup out for me. That confused me. I blinked at her for a moment, not sure if I should thank her or prepare myself for some kind of mean prank. When she noticed my reaction, she turned and went back to her breakfast without saying a word. Then Aaron spoke instead.

“Why are you up already, ... son?” That almost made me spill my coffee. I could almost hear the strain he was under, trying not to call me ‘Tiny’ AND acknowledge my position in the family tree. “You’re not planning on going to work, right?”

“Sure I am.” I replied and sipped on my cup. “I’ll drop off the doctor’s note into the school’s mailbox, so they have it as soon as Thanksgiving break is over. Then I need to get an appointment with our GP to check the staples and stitches, go to the pharmacy to get more painkillers, and then I’ll spend the rest of the day drugged up in the office.”

“Y ... You don’t have to do all this yourself!” Claire suddenly burst out, a little too loud for comfort. “I can take care of all that! Well ... except the drugged up office part, but I don’t want you working despite having a sick note! The doctor wouldn’t even release you without someone to look after you!”

“Thanks, but I’m good. I can work while sitting in front of a computer. Not that strenuous.” I dismissed her while taking the last sip of my coffee.

“You can rely on us from time to time, you know?” Aaron offered. Was he joking?

“Sure. Because asking you for help has always worked out so well for me.” I replied with a sarcastic tone and turned to leave the room.

Looking around, I noticed three embarrassed and almost hurt looking faces. Maybe I should get myself one of those automatic coffee makers with these little capsules. I could keep it in my room, so they could enjoy their mornings in peace.

As I stepped into my shoes after getting dressed, Claire suddenly showed up next to me in the hallway.

“I know we weren’t the best family for you, Honey. But please ... I’d really like to help you! I am here for you!” she pleaded.

“Uh huh. I had cracked ribs before and was perfectly fine taking care of myself.” I replied, ignoring her obvious wince upon hearing my words. “So, thanks, but I’m really good.”

“Be safe. I love you!” she quickly added as I stepped out of the door, but the only answer she got was the sound of the door closing behind me.

As planned, I first dropped off the doctor’s note at school. Then I got to our GP who immediately let me in after seeing my face to make sure the incisions were still good, and gave me prescriptions for more of the opiates to sleep. He also gave me a new sick note for the next four whopping weeks!

Since he had my medical history, he didn’t want to risk anything, and this was apparently how long it would take until it was “safe to ‘bump’ into people in the hallways” as he phrased it while making air quotes with a meaningful look.

This was fucking awesome! The sick note spanning four weeks would mean that the first day I could go back to school would be the first day of the two-week long Christmas break. This meant that I wouldn’t have to go back into that shithole for the next six fucking weeks! I made a mental note of calling the school as soon as Thanksgiving break was over, to check if they had some kind of online study program. The pharmacy was right next door to our GP and, within fifteen minutes, the ibuprofen had taken the edge off the pain, so I could spend the day working somewhat effectively.

After a few hours, however, I noticed that I wasn’t just sitting around like I had claimed in the parents’ kitchen. My chest started hurting whenever I let my left hand rest on the keyboard for more than two minutes, which turned typing into a quite tedious task. I was just groaning again when Bill came through the door, looking somewhat pensive.

“Hey, Kid. You know you don’t have to be here, right? Why don’t you at least stay home until you can use both your eyes again?”

“Nah, I can manage. But thank you for the offer.”

“Oh, thanks for dropping the adapter at my office yesterday.”

“No problem, Boss! Did it work? If not, I could take another look.”

“Worked perfectly fine.” he waved me off. “Got the first three videos digitized already. I came because of something else, though.” he said, but didn’t elaborate further. I had never seen him so hesitant before.

“Did I screw up something?” His behavior started to unsettle me...

“No. But maybe I did. I just got a call from John. Did you ever tell your folks about ... what happened with ... Tess?” he asked disturbingly cautiously. Bill knew how badly I had taken her death. He was the only one I had talked with before I came back from my vacation. And I’m pretty sure my behavior at Tess’ funeral wasn’t lost on him either.

“No, I didn’t. Wasn’t really eager to discuss it with them. Especially John’s wife. She has that tendency to meddle in things, trying to help, but making everything worse.” I answered, while shifting my attention back to my monitor.

“Well, they somehow heard. And, since they knew about the two of you being together in the office, they called me to confirm it. Sorry, Kid.” he explained.

“Not much you could do there, Boss. Thank you for warning me.” I said, with sincere gratitude in my voice, and he left after giving me a short nod.

How did they suddenly hear about Tess? They didn’t have any mutual friends or even acquaintances ... except for me, that is. Why did they even care now? They saw me when I was obviously grieving, but couldn’t be bothered to ask about my mood then. I didn’t understand these people, but I was sure there was a surprise waiting for me back home. I spent the remainder of the workday trying not to think about it and, on my way home, actually picked up a coffee maker with a full assortment of different capsules, and a few cups fitting the model.

When I entered the house with my new coffee maker under my right arm, Claire, Aunt Danielle, and the grandparents were in the living room. When they saw me enter, they all regarded me with the very same sad look Claire had given me in the morning. I turned to get up the stairs, but Aunt Danielle sensed my reluctance, sprang up from the sofa, and stood in front of me.

“Tim...” she started but didn’t come very far.

“Nope.” I just said, as I walked around her.

“But, Tim...” Claire called after me this time, in a pleading voice.

“No.” was, again, all I said as I walked up the stairs to get into my room, although a tad more insistent than the previous time.

“Pumpkin! Please! Talk to us!” Granny called after me.

“If I didn’t talk with any of you about Tess when she had just died, I sure as hell won’t do it now.” I called down the stairs before entering my old bedroom and closing the door.

The next few days came and went quietly. Don’t get me wrong, I was tempted to take their offer to talk. I was angry they ignored my obvious troubles before I moved out, and they were now trying to do the right thing. I just simply couldn’t talk about Tess yet, and seriously didn’t expect those people to provide me with any useful advice about anything. On top of that, my opinion of Danielle hadn’t changed in the slightest, so I avoided further confrontations until it was Thanksgiving dinner at Uncle John’s again. This was when things got interesting.

I had absolutely no motivation to attend, but the family managed to coerce me into it. They achieved that by showcasing a noteworthy deviation from their usual tactics. There were no demands, no ultimatums, and nobody tried to simply drag me along as a last resort. Instead, the grandparents showed up in my room after my refusal of Claire’s plea for my participation had left her close to tears again, and told me that it would be important for me to be there. They hinted that it may have something to do with the things I pointed out when the grandparents visited my apartment.

Of course, my lacking eagerness to attend this get-together was noticeable when it came to interacting with me. At least Uncle John’s sense for tradition, that suddenly manifested at last year’s Thanksgiving dinner, thankfully didn’t resurface. I had already pictured myself sitting at that table, telling everyone how thankful I was for the invention of Coffee Makers.

They still made a seemingly honest effort to try and include me in the conversations they had, asking for my opinions on every single topic that came up. Problem was, I simply didn’t have any opinions on those topics. I went to school as a loner, so I was out of the loop of current events that the teenagers would find interesting. And ever since Tess died, I fully focused on whatever project I was involved in at work, leaving me just as uninformed about topics the adults would find interesting. In essence, I had no idea what they were talking about, while they had no idea about the topics that would have interested me. The “geek stuff” as Aaron still liked to call it.

While I wanted to appreciate their efforts, too much had happened for me to just forget about it and play happy family. The fact that Logan was still running his interference game whenever one of the Women showed an interest, while nobody but me seemed to notice, also killed any inclination I might have had to return their effort. This was how the evening was progressing, until they inadvertently caused it all to go to shit.

“I’m sorry it’s so late” Aaron suddenly said after dinner, as he handed me a little envelope. “I admit, we really didn’t know what to get you. I hope this is Okay.”

I looked at him slightly confused but interested. Then I opened the envelope, and my interest was replaced by utter disappointment. They actually did it! They actually got me a $100 Amazon voucher!

“Wow ... thanks.” I replied in obvious disappointment. “What’s this for?”

They shared a short look, then Claire answered.

“Honey, we’re sorry we forgot your birthday. I promise we’ll do better.”

It was remarkable how sincere she sounded while handing me a present that proved, yet again, how prevalent their disregard for me was.

“Sure. Forgive me if I don’t hold my breath. You had the same resolve last year, after all.” I responded, as I dropped the envelope back on the table, making sure they knew how little it was appreciated. I fully planned on just leaving it there when it was time to leave for the parents’ house again.

“Kiddo, I know it’s coming late.” Grampa said, before throwing a disapproving side glance at Aaron. “And I admit, it’s not what I would call an especially thoughtful gift. But they are trying. Can you at least not dismiss them completely?”

I looked at him in disbelief.

“Look, I understand that you probably don’t know why this is the most thoughtless and borderline insulting ‘gift’ they could’ve possibly come up with, and once again proves how they never thought about the shit they put me through. But even you should realize by now that I have damn good reasons to blow them off, so why shouldn’t I?” I asked him.

“Because family is supposed to support each other!” Aunt Danielle proclaimed, in a voice that, halfway through saying it, sounded like she realized how utterly ridiculous this statement sounded when it was directed at me.

It was exactly the wrong thing to say to me at that moment. I was already well on my way to talk myself into rage, and decided to set things straight and make sure everybody knew where we stood.

“Let’s clarify this for you all, since you seem to purposefully ignore what’s going on in this ... family.” I started, looking from one face to the other, so they knew I was talking about all of them. “For four years, I’ve been treated like unwanted garbage by each and every one of you! For years, you either ridiculed and humiliated me for no other reason than your own fucking amusement, or you all straight up ignored my existence. You like to claim to be a psychologist, Aunty. Did it ever occur to you to warn them what effects it could have on an insecure, thirteen-year-old boy, if people insist on constantly making fun of his penis’ size? And don’t you fucking dare tell me you didn’t know about it, because I damn well remember you being around!”

She looked apologetic, but didn’t say anything. So, I turned my head to look at Claire and Aaron before I continued.

“How many fucking times did I literally beg you all to stop? You gonna tell me you never noticed the effect it had on me? When I basically locked myself in my room, just staying in bed for days without eating, before I started stress eating like a pig? Aunty, what does that sound like to you?”

I knew that I had developed depression back then. And they really didn’t care. Or, if they did, they didn’t show it. Going by the weird questions I was asked by Granny the day she showed up at my apartment, they seemed to finally suspect that my mind was still not exactly in a good place. And that it just got worse after Tess’ death.

“Are you aware that I’m seventeen and never had a real girlfriend? That’s because my oh-so-loving family made me the laughingstock, and painted me the target for bullies, in every social circle they had access to. If I tried to ask a girl out, she would laugh in my face because of my micropenis! Because fucking Princess over there absolutely had to tell the whole student body about it as soon as I stepped foot into her school, making the entire Cheer team ridicule me on a daily basis.” I said, as I pointed at Ava, who looked like she wanted to vanish when she saw the look Claire and the grandparents gave her. Noticing Claire’s glare set me off even more. “Don’t look at your daughter like that, Claire! ‘This is Tim, the smallest in the family!’. Remember that shit before you try to scold anyone else about that!”

A Hearing this, Claire’s face showed confusion at first, then recognition, before it finally morphed in embarrassment. Then I pointed at Logan.

“And of course, your fucking Golden Boy wasn’t to be outdone either, but, being the man he truly is, he didn’t stop at mean jokes. He stood by and watched his football team beat the shit out of me after stealing my phones and wallets!”

“Baby, I had no idea!” Claire pleaded.

“OF COURSE YOU FUCKING KNEW!” I shouted back, causing her to cringe. “You’ve SEEN me come home bleeding and bruised, every fucking day! You paid the bills whenever I had to see a doctor afterwards! And until your fucking husband and son told you how this is a ‘necessary experience for a boy to grow some balls’, you even knew it was serious enough to call the school about it! But you went along with their decision to NOT help! Think back to why I had to get a job in the first place! Because you refused to keep paying to replace the stolen phones! And because you refused to pay for my textbooks, after one of their pranks had them covered in horseshit!”

When Aaron remembered, he seemed to finally realize what damage he had caused with this.

“But ... Baby...” Claire started in a desperate voice, while openly crying now. “We won’t ... I promise! We’ll never do it again!”

“Oh how nice of you! You still haven’t realized the extent of the damage you’ve caused, have you? I had to ask John for a reference for a real job because I got fired from the student job I had first. I couldn’t work a single shift without some assholes somehow recognizing and throwing dick jokes at me. Or tripping me while I was carrying plates. And it wasn’t even just other students. There were also a few of your friends in the mix!” I said, gesturing to Claire and Aaron. “It caused so many disturbances that the owner of the Diner had to let me go. So THANK YOU for FINALLY stopping to humiliate and verbally abuse your own fucking child! Good luck getting everyone in the school and your friends to stop as well! Maybe your favorite shrink can finally do her damn job, and help YOU to get YOUR shit together, instead of demanding me to simply forget about all this crap!”

Claire looked devastated. She never thought about what she had really done to me. She had realized they neglected me, but she apparently never understood the reasons for why I had distanced myself from them before the neglect became a problem.

“And now you pull this shit!” I spat those words out while grabbing the envelope from the table and waving it in Aarons direction. “So, let me get this straight. I pay rent, while your other two kids live rent-free. I bought my own car and pay for its insurance and gas, while your other two kids got their cars bought and paid for, including fucking gas money! I pay for my groceries myself, because most of the time you don’t remember me when cooking, while your other two kids get whatever the fuck they want. I even pay for my own damn clothes! I ask you for NOTHING anymore! Still, over the weeks since Golden Boy left for college, you felt entitled to more than TWO THOUSAND FUCKING DOLLARS from MY hard earned savings, to pay for your favorite son’s shit! And then, you present me with a $100 voucher, and call it a fucking gift!? Give me twenty-one more of these, preferably in cash, and THEN you can think about giving me any money as a present!”

Everyone but Aaron, Claire and Ava stared in shock. I think, even after I had pointed out the highlights to the grandparents, they still only accepted exactly those highlights. None of them had any idea just how big the rift in our family really was, or how far removed from our relationship as parent and child we had become. None of them had ever realized how lost I had felt in this family for years.

I really didn’t know why Logan looked shocked, though. Claire, however, was now also sobbing in addition to her crying.

“It was for college!” she blubbered “His education ... we didn’t think ... we just...”

“Oh, sure! Like always! He made it sound so reasonable, right!?” I seethed. “So reasonable, in fact, that you didn’t even consider that it could possibly be unfair to me! Tell me, ’parents’, if I had to get a job to pay for my fucking schoolbooks when I was fifteen, why is it that your grown-ass Golden Boy gets my money thrown at him, no questions asked!?”

Logan immediately looked extremely uncomfortable, and I didn’t think it was embarrassment. He looked perfectly fine the whole time I was ranting, nothing I said had phased him in the slightest, until I started talking about him getting my money. Only then did his expression rapidly change. He quickly tried to change the topic and, in his usual manner, tried to shift the blame on me and defuse my claims in the stupidest way possible.

“Dude, stop blaming us for what’s going wrong in your life! So you never had a girlfriend. That isn’t our fault, or that Tess chic wouldn’t have left you!” he called out.

My mind went blank for a second. While I was pissed before, absolute fucking rage built in my stomach now. I heard the others’ dull voices protest in shock as soon as Logan had closed his mouth. Either he was the only one who didn’t know that Tess didn’t just ‘leave’ me, or he just made a grave mistake by showing his true colors. Either way, he was going to pay for it!

“What the fuck, Logan!” Came from Ava and Maggie, followed by a scared “TIM!” as Danielle noticed my chair flying back, causing everyone’s attention to shift back to me.

I moved towards Logan in purposeful strides, my eyes focused on nothing but him as he himself got up and quickly tried to build some distance between us. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed Aaron trying to get in my way, but without slowing down, without even taking my eyes off Logan, I just extended my right arm and jammed two fingers into his upper stomach, right below his sternum. When my fingers connected, he groaned loudly as his upper body cramped up and he stumbled backwards away from the pain.

When I reached Logan, he tried to hit me. Since he never was a fighter, though, he was not just slow, but also clumsy as hell. I easily evaded his punch with a simple step to the left, raised my left arm, and slapped him across the face as hard as I could muster. Which wasn’t as much as I would have preferred, since, sadly, my ribs didn’t allow that. As soon as I strained my muscles to move my arm inwards, the pain in my chest made me slow down considerably.

My hand still connected perfectly. The heel of my hand landed square on his jaw with my cupped fingers across his ear, yet not nearly as hard as I had intended, which probably saved him from being completely knocked out. He went to the floor and just sat there disoriented for a while, unable to focus his view and disoriented from the beeping he was undeniably hearing in his left ear now.

“Damn.” I said in wonder, looking at Aunt Danielle. “That felt really good.”

The family stared at me in shock. I really meant it, though. Not just bitchslapping the douchebag, but finally letting out all the shit I had held bottled up within me for the last four years. Just then, Claire jumped up and ran to Logan to check on him. I watched her frantically dote over her fallen darling.

“Why am I not surprised you don’t see this as a ’necessary experience to grow some balls’, when it comes to him?” I asked, contempt thick in my voice. I actually considered spitting on him for good measure.

“Timothy! That’s enough!” Grandpa shouted at me. “I know you’re angry, and I admit it’s warranted, but throwing punches goes too far!”

“I disagree.” I said, as I stood in front of him. I guess he saw how much of a threat I was at that moment, because he took a quick step away from me. “The little pissant should thank the heavens that I’m not like him. Because, if I were, I would’ve called two of my friends over and told them not to stop when he was on the ground!”

He paled slightly as his eyes darted from me to Logan.

“If you want to call the cops on me, I’ll be waiting for them at home. My home.” I finished, and turned to leave.

I couldn’t believe how they still cared about the asshole so much, especially after everything I had just pointed out. He even had videos of quite a few of their little orgies on his phone, placing them all in danger if he ever lost it. Or had it stolen. Or got hacked. Which happened. I hacked him...

I froze.

My hand hung immovable in mid-air, halfway to the doorknob, as all those little pieces of information suddenly fell into place. After I had summarized the past four years to my family and gotten it all off my chest, I could finally connect the dots!

Logan had talked the parents into giving him money. They had never touched any of my savings before, despite having access to it for years, so they probably didn’t do it out of disrespect to me, but because he needed more money than they could afford. And his explanation about it being loosely related to his education made them comply.

He never told any of us what he needed the money for specifically, making me think it was embarrassing for him. But the way he reacted now, when I pointed it out in front of the family, made me think he tried to hide the reason from the family in particular.

The people who came after him for that money were armed and had no problem making threats, so he was probably involved in something illegal.

He had lied to the police about not knowing them. If he was just scared, he could have asked anyone for help, like John, who was best friends with the owner of a security company. But he didn’t, so they probably had something over him to keep him in line.

The people who came after him recognized Ava and Claire just by looking at them.

They made clearly indecent proposals to those two.

Logan had videos of them fucking.

“You. Fucking. Muppet!” I shouted out, after turning back towards Logan. I was staring at him with amazement, big eyes and open mouth, after the realization hit me. The others looked at me like I had turned crazy, staring like that after I had just attacked him. “They’re blackmailing you!”

Logan, suddenly fully conscious again, looked scared as all hell when I said it. That was the confirmation I needed.

“Blackmail? Who? What are you talking about?” Claire asked in confusion, but still cradling his head.

“They got hold of your videos, didn’t they?” I asked Logan with a calmness that surprised even myself, while a strange smile grew on my face that must have looked quite unnerving to the others. “That’s how they recognized Ava and Claire.”

Logan freed himself from Claire’s hold, stood up, and stepped away from everyone else, frantically looking from face to face like a scared caged animal.

“What is...” Aaron started after seeing Logan’s reaction, but I just kept talking.

“You pay them, and they don’t publish the videos? Or are they threatening to send it to the police instead?” I asked him.

“Timothy Michael Brown! Explain what is going on RIGHT NOW!” Granny shouted, clearly done with me persistently ignoring their questions while Logan looked like he was ready to jump through a window to get away. I shifted my attention to her.

“The people who came after him four days ago and stabbed me. They’re blackmailing him with the videos he took of you guys.” I explained, but they all looked confused as to what kind of video could be used to blackmail anyone. “The videos he took at your orgies?” I added impatiently, waving my hand across the room.

“WHAT!?” I heard a chorus of voices.

“You FILMED US!?” Maggie screamed at Logan in horror.

I remembered how, after I had first found these videos on Logan’s phone, I had a quick thought about the angles in some of them. How they looked like the others may not even have known he was filming. Apparently, they didn’t know about ANY of the videos.

All of them, even Logan, looked at me like I lost my mind while I laughed my ass off. I laughed so hard I had to hold my stomach because it felt like the staples would fly out. They just didn’t get the joke.

Their beloved Golden Boy had betrayed all of their trust, violated their rights, and placed them all in grave danger. THAT was the guy they kept defending and supporting. THAT was the guy they wanted as their son, while I was downgraded to either tenant or servant. THAT was the guy they all chose over me. As far as I was concerned, they deserved each other. Sadly, I couldn’t just leave them to their fate without knowing exactly what happened because, until I turned eighteen, I would be affected by this as well. Though, at that point, I wasn’t yet sure as to what degree it would affect me.

Logan tried to make a run for it, but Aaron, John, and Grampa Mike had him pinned down surprisingly quickly.

“You ... You know about...” Claire stuttered, making her priorities known while her shaking hand was covering her mouth.

“Yes, ever since I walked in on you all on Ava’s sweet sixteen. Gotta say, made the difference in treatment between your children very clear. You were all a little too busy to notice me, though.” I added when she looked shocked and despaired at the same time. “Just add it to the long, long list of activities your family excluded me from. But now we need to deal with the mess your favored child has caused.”

I had said it with just a smidge of vindictiveness in my voice. It was still enough to make her fall to her knees and break down completely. Especially after the barrage of accusations she had just taken from me a few minutes ago, that already had her in tears. Her parents were quickly by her side to support her, but I had more pressing matters to attend to.