Chapter 36

I was doing my “Grandpa Duty” Friday night, baby-sitting the little ones. We watched a cute movie “The Secret Life of Pets”. I looked over at the dog and cat and got to thinking...

Dog Diary.
8:00 am. Dog food! My favorite thing!
9;30 am. Car ride! My favorite thing!
9:45 am. Running at the dog park! My favorite thing!
10:00 am. Tummy rubs! My favorite thing!
12:00pm. Home again and getting cookies! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm. Nap time! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm. Going for a walk! My favorite thing!
5:30 pm. Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:30 pm. Snuggle on sofa and watch tv with my person! My favorite thing!
9:00 pm. Another walk! My favorite thing!
10:00 pm. Bed time! My favorite thing!

Cat Diary.
Day 925 of captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat while I’m fed some sort of wet hash, or dry nuggests. Although I make my contempt for these offerings perfectly clear, I must eat something, and thus I reluctantly consume what is placed in the serving platters in order to keep up my strength.

The only thing that keeps me going is the dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet where it is easily stepped in. Today I decapitated a mouse and left the headless body at their feet. I had hoped to strike fear into their hearts, as this clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they made condescending comments about how I was a ‘good little hunter’ and disposed of it. BASTARDS!

There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices this evening. I was sequestered in another room for the duration. I could hear them talking and smell the food. I overheard the comment that I was placed into solitary confinement due to the power of me causing ‘allergies’. I must learn just what that means and discover a way to use that to my advantage!

Earlier, I was almost successful in my attempt to assassinate the main male tormentor of the group by weaving around and between his ankles as he was walking. I will do this again soon, when he is at the top of the stairs.

I’m convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is released on a regular basis and is always happy to return. He is obviously an idiot. The bird must be an informant. I boserve him communicate on a regular basis with the guards. No doubt he tells them of my every move. As a result, my captors have arraigned for him to be in protective custody. He is kept in an elevated cell, so he is safe.

For now.