Chapter 17

Jack walked into the rec room and noted all the ‘usual suspects’ were there. Sita and Cardox were in their usual chairs. Nyka was at a table by the books, going over something on her datapad. Kazlaena and Rusu were at it on the VR system, playing a scary game which made Jack grin a little. Both were none too eager to play scary games, but there was word circulating that they were dared to do it. The game required ‘monster hunters’ to go in and identify what creature they were dealing with, then hunt it down and take care of it. Charm watched from the large couch with gritted teeth, tensing up as Kazlaena and Rusu went through an abandoned building, looking for clues. What made him surprised, and glad to see, was that Pri was present and watching the game with interest from where she sat on the smaller loveseat. Pri did come to the rec room but it was pretty rare before he left, making her a very hard target for pranks. This was the first time he saw her here since he had come back. Jack intended to creep up behind her and give her a bit of a start but she scented him out pretty quickly and turned around, eyeing him with suspicion.

“What foul intention is planned now?” She asked curiously.

“Nothin...” Jack replied meekly.

Pri gave him a grin like ‘caught you’ and he walked over, joining her on the loveseat.

“Game is rather intense, no reservations for jump scares.” Pri said curiously.

“Not your thing?” Jack asked.

“Have yet to try.”

“You’re gonna give it a go?” He was surprised.

“Soon. Next round after Sita and Rusu,” Pri said, almost embarrassed.

Jack could see her fidgeting a little and knew it was one of her telltale signs of discomfort. He reached over and bumped her leg.

“Eh, you’ll have fun.”

“You never play vidgames?” Pri asked. “No interest?”

“Never tried much past my youth,” Jack replied. “Had that old ... hell was it called? It was a box you could load vidgames into and take them to friends’ houses.”

“The digivid,” Charm said enthusiastically.

“Yeah, that’s it,” Jack pointed at her and grinned. “You had one too?”

“Ah lived off that sucker in college years,” She replied. “Medschool was wall to wall, a stampede of notes and courses. Ain’t none of us wanted to mess it up gettin’ sloshed. So on what wee downtime we had, we jumped all over that system.”

“Some fun memories on there,” Jack leaned back.

“Nerds,” Sita yelled over. “I say that as I play and watch the fuckin VR religiously...”

The sound of several people laughing filled the room.

“Swearing!” Kazlaena said, then “AHHHHHH!” As her character was attacked.

Sita looked over at the others sheepishly as Cardox shook a finger at her. “Swearing leads to reprimands, reprimands lead to team casualties. Do not swear.”

“Yes sir,” Sita said back in false moderation.

“Ya ever play that one vid game ... oh...” Charm thought for a moment. “Was jumping, lots of jumping, hard as nails and that was just the first level.”

“Yeah...” Jack grinned. “Half the reason I smoke today was from that fu ... nking game. Was called Vertical. I remember the premise well. You had to jump up the tower to avoid the rising lava. Silly basic concept, easy to start, impossible to win, supposedly.”

“Ah can agree to that.” Charm said.

Kazlaena took her headset off and handed it over to Sita.

“Aight let’s get this scareshow fu ... ulfilled?” She stifled a laugh and a grin, trying to make her swear avoidance seem natural.

Kazlaena skipped over to the loveseat and slid in between Pri and Jack, taking one of their hands in each of her own.

“Pri, you never played Vertical?” Charm asked. “Ever play many vidgames?”

“Negative on Vertical,” Pri shook her head. “Do play one game.”

Kazlaena was looking at Pri with a beaming smile and Pri gave Kazlaena’s hand a brush with her thumb.

“Pri ‘as sa neat looking game.” Kazlaena said.

“Oh?” Even Jack looked over, a little surprised the Sezar had a vidgame hobby.

“Game is System of Elysia,” Pri said to their inquisitive looks. “Sim game based on building cities, making people happy.”

“Sounds impossible,” Cardox said.

“Can be difficult.” Pri agreed.

“You will still sow me sough, yes?” Kazlaena asked.

“Certainly.” Pri smiled.

“You should show Pri Bad Bots.” Jack said to Kazlaena.

“Yes?” Kazlaena grinned. “I sould. So fun. I like sa story, sa characters.”

“Future gaming exchange happily anticipated.” Pri smiled and caught Jack’s look, grinning contently.

“So, you play the sim games huh?” Jack asked.

“Correct,” Pri nodded.

“I had a couple of those make a city type games. Immature boys being boys...” He started laughing, then covered Kazlaena’s ears. “Couple of my friends, we used to mess around bad. Make towns resemble all kinds of inappropriate stuff. Ass town, wienerville, boobietropolis, village of the fuckin idiots. Every time we had a run in with a cranky fucker or someone stompin on our fun, we designed a special lot just for them in the game, the more fucked up the better. Nothin beats a driveway that snakes on forever in a lot, only to park at a garage and walk a mile long hedge row to get to the house, all with continuous sprinklers going and dozens of dogs chasing you.”

Kazlaena pulled Jack’s hands away from her ears and looked up at him intently. “I ‘eard everysing. You Terrans and your fascination wis sa privates. You are strange sometimes and Jack! Sa swearing!”

Jack gave her an innocent look and pressed his lips together.

“Sentiment shared with equal disbelief,” Pri replied, then stood up as Sita handed over her headset.

“I aint fu-ully get this game,” Sita watched her tongue.

“I, not sure how to use,” Pri looked over the headset.

“Like sis,” Kazlaena got her to bend down so she could put the goggles on Pri’s eyes.

After a moment’s adjustment, she wrapped the wrist bands around Pri’s hands and started showing her the controls. Jack pulled out his commpad and got a couple of photos of their interaction. Something he would send to Pri later when they were done.

Sometime later, Saito entered the rec room and waved when Jack looked over to him. Rusu and Nyka were sitting on the couch. Charm had left to return to her work in the medical center and Sita had gone to take a nap, while Cardox was asleep in his usual chair. Kejeh and Pri now occupied the loveseat while Jack stood behind them, waiting for a coffee to brew. He walked over to join Saito and check on his coffee as Saito began prepping a cup of his own.

“Day going good?” Saito asked Jack.

“Pretty good, yeah,” Jack nodded. “Yourself?”

“Not bad, not bad,” Saito saw Jack’s half concealed grin and knew what he was about. “You have all five targets.” He whispered.

Jack looked over everyone watching the game intently, seeing Kazlaena beating Sita in one of the sports games.

“Who’s gonna figure it out first?” Jack whispered.

“Kazzo.” Saito put a ten luc bill on the counter.

“Ten, how about twenty,” Jack put a twenty down.

“Big gambler, huh?” Saito nodded. “Ok, Jack. Twenty, but you control the squeak.”

“On,” Jack pulled out a hidden rubber balloon from under the countertop and almost lost his composure before they had even begun the game.

He looked over the non-Terrans of the crew that were present. Their hearing could pick up frequencies’ immune to Terran ears and if a rubber balloon was blown up, and released just right, they could all hear it, though faintly.

“Fuck,” Jack whispered as he blew up the balloon, then pinched it between his fingers.

This has to be just right ... He slowly loosened his grip, staring at Saito who looked past him to the crew. Saito shook his head, and Jack let his grip slacken a little more.

“Oh,” Saito said in barely a whisper as the Lexos started looking around, then spoke to each other in their language.

Jack let a little more air go and now Pri and Kejeh were looking around, casting momentary glances at each other, before looking at Jack and Saito. Saito pretended to work on making a cup of coffee.

“Well, Kona blend is pretty good, right Jack?” Saito said through stifled laughs.

“Yeah, or the hazelnut coffee. I go mainly for that,” Jack released a little more air, causing all four crew who could hear it, to begin looking around frantically.

“You hear?” Rusu asked Pri.

“Strange noise is heard.” Pri nodded.

Jack let a little more air out and now Kazlaena was alerted to the situation. She slowly took her headset off and spoke up.

“Wat sat noise?”

“Do not know,” Rusu said with a bit of a laugh. “Is funny, no?”

“Strange,” Kazlaena said, then all five non Terrans began cocking their heads, straining to hear the sound again as Jack let most of the air out of the balloon.

Saito was done, bending over to hide behind the counter as Jack looked over his shoulder casually.

“Y’all ok there?” He said, unable to keep his laughter down and immediately drawing the suspicion of everyone.

“Sat noise...” Kazlaena eyed him suspiciously. “Jack, are you, wat are you doing sere?” She walked over purposely, staring up at him intently.

“Nothin,” Jack bit his lip but couldn’t stop his grin, feeling his jaw ache as he tried to keep a straight face.

“Look at Saito, ‘es aware somesing is funny. You, somesing you are doing to make sat noise?”

“Me, noise?” Jack tried subterfuge but his momentary fits of laughter did little to aid his intent. “I’ma just makin coffee,”

Kazlaena looked at him a bit sharply, though she was holding back a smile. Jack looked over the crew and saw all eyes on him, realizing his game was up. He tried to stash the balloon but her sharp eyes caught his deception. Her tail began wagging as she tried to reach for his hand. He pulled back and stepped away, immediately finding himself in the grasp of both Pri and Rusu.

“Out with foul noise maker, mister,” Pri gave him a grin as Saito vacated the area, laughing down the hall.

“Uh oh,” Jack bit his lip. “I’m really in for it now.”

“We’ll tickle you silly, silly,” Kazlaena thought about that for a sec, then eyed him again.

“Only one thing to do,” Jack stepped away and blew the balloon up, then began letting out air from it in a long, drawn-out shriek.

Everyone looked at each other expressionless. Kazlaena covered her ears while Pri rose her lip in a bit of a furl. Kejeh covered her face while the Lexocanus’ looked at each other as if they had no idea how to handle this. Jack just continued to slowly release the air, staring at each of them in turn, expressionless as if what was going on was no big deal, natural even. He then released the balloon and it shot out into the middle of the floor where Kazlaena jumped on it a few times, then stuffed it in a pocket.

“No more noise for sa marsmallow,” she said bluntly and stomped a couple of steps, then hopped back to her game and put her headset on.

Pri and Rusu were not content for Jack to get off so easy. She darted in and got him in a bear hug while Rusu took a hold of the band on his under shorts, pulling up sharpy.

“Ach,” Jack burst out laughing. “I wasn’t aware you all even knew about that...”

“Underwedge suits crime of noise buffoonery,” Pri said as she set him down, watching him walk over awkwardly to his coffee.

“Ah, right in the crack man,” Jack did a little upper leg step out and stretch. “Gotta pull that out.”

“Oh! Not pleasant!” Rusu stepped back.

“Backfire, Backfire!” Pri said between short laughs as Jack reached down the back of his pants to pull his shorts free, then rushed at them with his wedgie pulling hand.

“Gavaka!” Pri spat out and jumped back.

“Ba’na-kabo,” Rusu shouted frantically and ran to hide behind his sister, who was eyeing the whole affair with confusion and reservation as if she wanted to partake but was unsure how.

“Fee fi fo fum, my hand was just in my bum.” Jack walked menacingly at Pri and she began backing up.

“Away with butt-mitt,” She went into a Sikarran martial stance, a semi crouch with the left leg out and right leg poised to spring into a jump. She had her hands out in front of her, almost like a boxer. “Smell of swass already taints nostrils.”

“There’s even a couple ass hairs on it.” Jack said factually.

Pri snarled and gave him a sharp hiss.

“Heh, you bite my hand and you’ll have my ass hairs in your mouth.”

“You are peculiar, Coralane.” Kejeh remarked calmly as she watched Pri start retching at his statement.

Jack backed off and grinned, seeing Saito had returned and slipped the money into his pocket unseen, giving Jack a wink before checking on his coffee.

You win this round. Jack thought, grinning, then turned to see Pri cough as she held her fist up to the end of her snout, doubled over.

“Jack, heeuuuggg, disgusahhhhhhhh, disgusting,” She tried to speak quickly between retches. “Ahack, ahack ... hhherrrggggg...”

“Here, lemme give you a hand,” He went to brush his hand through her feathers, and she moved quickly away, trying to keep an eye on him while continuing to gag.

Jack felt he’d pressed her enough and grinned. “Alright, I’m gonna go pull my balls outta my asshole now, back in a sec...”

Kazlaena looked out from under her headset and eyed Jack for a moment, then looked at Pri and did her best not to laugh.

Jack entered the ready room and nodded to Lucinia, who was seated at her desk. He took his usual seat and leaned back as far as he could, noting they were the first two in attendance for the meeting.

“Bets on who enters next?” He asked with a grin.

“No,” She shook her head. “That is not professional laddie. Besides, we both know it will likely be my brother.”

“Yeah. Still, Five-Minutes-Early-Is-On-Timicus isn’t here yet, just sayin.” He removed the timepiece from his belt and held it up.

“That name’s stretching it.” Lucinia fought back a smile.

“Why? Cause it’s so long?” Jack inquired.

Just as he finished speaking, Kazlaena entered the room, hurrying to her preferred spot beside Jack.

“Nice.” Jack smiled as Kazlaena looked up at him cheerfully. “You beat the Clock-Watchicus. He’s gotta own that one, Mr Arrives-Before-Everyone-Elsicus.” Kazlaena put her hands up to cover her face and giggled.

“Jack!” Lucinia made a hand gesture for him to stop but she fought to keep a straight face.

Jack saw he was overdoing it and moved to change the situation, popping a mint in his mouth from a wrapped roll. He offered the roll to Kazlaena but retracted it swiftly before she could grab it.

“‘ey, give sat back!” She said swiftly as she reached for the roll, but he held it away, forcing her into a close quarters grapple attempt.

Lucinia burst into laughter as she saw the Vandean’s tail whipping back and forth frantically in excitement. Kazlaena was athletic, flexible, and stronger than Jack often gave her credit for, succeeding in getting a hold of his hand as it clenched the roll. As he gripped tighter against her attempt to open his hand, the roll burst apart, and mints went scattering everywhere. Kazlaena let out a little shriek of excitement.

“Stow that behavior, Second Officer, Cadet. Save it for the rec room.” Proculus said from the door as he entered.

“Sorry First Officer,” Kazlaena took her seat meekly.

“The Cadet was just helping me pick up the mints I spilled, First Officer.” Jack remarked. “I don’t think that tone is necessary.”

“Pardon?” Proculus set down the datapad he was carrying at his usual seat.

“There’s no need to spaz out over a simple accident.” Jack replied.

“I know what I saw,” Proculus replied. “Don’t get out of line, Coralane, like you did with your radio conduct on Junkers Refuge. You are supposed to set an example for others to follow.”

“For starters, by what manner is spilling mints improper conduct?” Jack asked. “Secondly, I didn’t have time to explain in detail what should have been obvious to anyone listening over comms. If you can’t follow what’s going on, maybe we need to get someone who can read the situation without useless radio traffic.”

“What!” Proculus barked as Kazlaena shrunk down in her seat.

“Enough,” Lucinia stepped in. “You are the two senior officers on board. You are both failing at setting a good example before an eager young Cadet, who is trying to follow your leads. You two need to learn how to work things out without these disagreements affecting other crew members.”

Jack was about to protest but he saw the road ahead was going to make things uneasy between himself, Proculus and the Captain.