Jessica had Jill and Joanna try on the aprons.

“Kind of cool,” Joanna said, “but what are they for?”

“Outfits,” Jessica told them. “You’ll be manning our booth at the upcoming Elks Bake Sale. By manning I mean womaning. Or maybe it should be girling. Whatever. Anyway.”

“But what about the rest of the outfit?” Jill asked. “The shirt and skirt and such?”

“There is no shirt and skirt and such,” Jessica said. “What you see is what the Elks see. Don’t worry, it’s for a good cause.”

“What’s the cause?” Jill asked.

Jessica said, “I don’t know yet. I’ll think of something.”

“And what will we be selling?” Joanna asked.

“That’s right, you have to sell something. I got it. Cookies! Homemade cookies!”

“Do you know how to make homemade cookies?” Jill asked.

“Sure I do,” Jessica claimed. “What could be so hard? Flour, sugar, eggs. Um, nuts, spices, and a secret ingredient.”

“What’s the secret ingredient?” Joanna wanted to know.

“Varvyx1,” Jessica said. “You gotta have a secret ingredient.”

“But what’s Varvyx1,” Jill asked.

“Extract of rat vulva,” Jessica whispered. “Don’t tell anyone. Unless they ask. Now let’s talk about the perks. I’m thinking they buy a dozen they get a kiss. Two dozen comes with a blow job. Five dozen they get a fuck.”