Chapter 13: Two Answers

“And he said to me, ‘Because you were cold.’”

“And then?”

“Why I ripped off my towel and jumped on top of him and fucked his brains out!” Carina replied angrily.

Then after she calmed down, she told him the truth.

“Actually, I rolled over on him and cried my eyes out. And the whole time he just held me and ran his hand up and down my spine. Finally, when I stopped crying, he helped me sit up and handed me the box of tissues. Then, without another word, he left the room.”

“That’s it?” Roland asked his wife.

“Oui. When he left so suddenly, I just didn’t know what to think,” Carina replied. “What should I have done?”

“Do you want the husband’s point of view or the psychiatrist’s point of view?”

“I don’t know...” she sniffed. “I know that you and I, we have a somewhat open marriage, and we have both had other partners. But we have always been together in our ... adventures and besides, I have never felt like this about another man. He bounces from my motherly instincts to my sexual instincts to my I-don’t-know-what instincts. He draws me in with simple, romantic gestures, and he feels something for me from the bottom of his heart. It’s getting almost impossible to avoid giving in to him.”

“Our Daniel is a very passionate man-child,” Roland said.

“Yes, he is, isn’t he?” Carina replied. “So, what should I do? I can’t avoid him for the next six weeks.”

“Okay. The ‘psychiatrist’s’ answer: Do you like his passion?”

“Ah ... yes.”

“Good. Do you like the idea of him being a virgin?”

“Mixed on that one. There’s a lot to be said for experience.”

“Okay. Do you love him?”

“No ... er, Yes ... I don’t know!”

“Interesting...”

“ROLAND! Don’t do that! I’m so confused. And over a child!”

“Make no mistake, Carina. Daniel is no child. He is an innocent, passionate man who happens to be a virgin. And he is in love with you. But he is not a child.”

“He’s ... he’s in love with me? Oh, Roland. What should I do?”

“Let me ask you a serious question, Carina. If you go to him, will you come back to me?”

Carina was quiet for a long time. Finally, she said, “Daniel is offering me something that I feel has been missing in my life. You were experienced when we met, and you taught me many things. Now, I feel the urge to pass that on. To teach someone new what you have taught me. I’d like to show Daniel how to make love, not just fuck. But to do that, I have to admit that I love him. The question is, can I love two men? Is there room in my heart for the man who has loved me and cared for me and given me children and a home and his love. But also, room for a young man who is just starting his adventure, as it were. Who is setting out on a journey that may or may not include me and you?

“Okay. Now for the ‘husband’ answer: Go to him, Carina. It will make you happy. It will make you fulfilled. But just remember to come back to me.”

The twenty-four-meter catamaran was quiet and dark as it sit bobbing gently at anchor. Tomorrow they would unfurl the sails and set sail on an adventure halfway around the world. But tonight, Carina wanted to set sail on another adventure. One she was unsure of where it would end. She loved her husband with all her heart, but something about this young man pulled at her very soul. She had to find out. Was it real, or just her imagination running away with her? Once more she thanked God for such an understanding mate as she knocked softly on his open door.

“May I come in?” Carina whispered softly.

“Carina, are you sure about this?” Daniel asked from somewhere in the dark.

“I’m cold...”