Fork 12

I planned to start this loop mostly the same as the last one, but instead of drug store candy I decided to get a coffee shop mocha instead. The two cops that I had seen before were standing next to their cars talking again, with the doors open and engines running. I knew I owed it to my henchmen boyfriends to make a play.

Making a dash for the car and driving off before they could react didn’t seem like it would work. I needed to distract them somehow. In video games you can just throw a rock somewhere to get the enemy to go investigate. That wasn’t going to work, but maybe some breaking glass might. There was a pretty Porsche at the other end of the parking lot, so I hid and threw a rock into the window as hard as I could. I didn’t break the glass, but I did set off an alarm. They both came to investigate.

I snuck around the other side of the building and dashed into the closest cop car. I found the lever to put it in gear and gave it some gas, but it didn’t move. I looked around and eventually found a parking brake pedal. I pushed in on it but it didn’t pop out like it was supposed to. My heart was beating like I was being chased by a cougar, and I couldn’t believe the cops hadn’t noticed me yet. They were going to shoot me for sure. I started just pulling and pushing on everything I could find, and when I pulled one thing the brake popped out and I started rolling, which I wasn’t ready for. I got back into position and started driving out, but then this other car was coming and I had to stop. Then I heard the cops yelling at me and saw them running up.

I made it out of the parking lot - at least that much was a victory. But I really wasn’t comfortable driving fast, so they boxed me in with the other police car quickly. I’d like to think that as they were pulling me out of the car I would have offered blowjobs to let me go, or at least said something witty about the men I was on my way to fuck, but I guess I suck at being a rebel because I reflexively just said, “Yes sir” a bunch until I hit my reset button. They never even pulled their guns out.