Chapter 34

All of them were older ... except for the twins who were paying volunteers. They were 17 ... my age. Extremely childish ... stupid jokes and full of themselves. Bodily functions caused snickers and asides ... like Bevis and Butthead ... who I had never heard of but were fully explained by ‘the adults’. The twins were ever after referred to as B&B.

I was expected to fall at their feet and worship. HA!

Monty Python ... a British comedy group ... was also explained ... with quotes.

I rented the series and binge watched over a weekend. I must have had the audio playing loudly because I was invaded. Lon ... the ROTC cadet, possessed a DVD of the Holy Grail and Life of Brian. Someone else had The Princess Bride and Pulp Fiction.

One of the women had The Big Lebowski. By the time that weekend was over, my place was THE place to go. The excavating crew bought their own beer and kept the fridge stocked. The ‘crew’ began taking me with when they bar-hopped.

My Education was sadly lacking., ... I had allowed the University first place ... my spiritual growth was stunted. I learned a lot. I found I was very good at Butt Quarters. Do you know Butt Quarters? No?

Allow me to elucidate. Butt Quarters is a game with 25 cent pieces ... tight jeans ... or loose silk running shorts ... and beer, in cups ... red plastic cups.

The gist of the game requires a single quarter to be dropped in a cup of beer. Don’t spill ... spillers buy the house a round.

The Quarter is clenched between butt cheeks ... the butt is maneuvered over a cup.

This can be done by a single person ... OR ... a team of four holding the bomber over the cup ... line it up ... and bombs away. Hits are rewarded.

The reward is that all the other competitors drink a swallow. Misses are chug style by the missee and/or team. Winners are still standing.

Bomb release: Single contestant? At will. Team ... a nipple makes a good bomb release.

Then Bud brought the SPAD back. She looked like a new bird. Ran better than new ... and the rear cockpit had a ‘glass cockpit.’

I was told: The controls in a glass cockpit have fewer mechanical components to break down or return false readings. The biggest advantage to a glass cockpit over traditional cockpits is that the automation systems are more accurate, the information is more precise, and the data is displayed more ergonomically.

I guess. The front cockpit was traditional ‘boiler’ gauges and indicators. I admit ... the rear seat was informative ... the front was fun.

I gave almost a hundred grand worth of rides ... fuel for a radial is expensive. Then I made the mistake of flying ... with the pit boss ... out to Seadrift and buzzed my Leopard catamaran ... upside down and just off the deck ... not the boat deck ... masthead high.

I was just going out for a little recreational stunting ... you know ... show off a little and see if I could make him puke. He didn’t ... but ... the last weekend ... Yup ... everyone who wanted to go sailing ... did.

We went looking for the sub ... found it. EVERY-body was impressed. Impressed that it was still there ... impressed that it was still ‘laying mines.’

“I thought the Coast Guard would have that cleaned up by now,” I said.

Hmm ... it is to wonder.