Glyph of Warding

I was madly in love with Harry, but sometimes you need to talk to someone outside of the relationship. Corey and I were studying at his house when I decided to fill him in on the secret.

“You know how I was asking you about prophecy a while back?” I asked Corey. “It’s because it’s sort of happening to me. A couple years ago we found sex tapes on the Internet. My sex tapes, even though I hadn’t done the stuff in them yet. I still haven’t for most of them. But some of them have come true. I’m kind of freaking out.”

“Yeah, right!” He said. I gave him a pleading look. “Pictures or it didn’t happen!” He challenged me.

“Come on, dude! This is embarrassing! Why you gotta be like that?”

“Mallory, you’re asking me to believe the impossible.”

So then I showed him the strip tease video and told him about the party. And then I told him about the blowjob video, and how it happened even though we tried to avoid it.

“Wait, so you’re giving blowjobs to friends now?” He asked presumptuously.

“I’m giving blowjobs to my boyfriend,” I corrected him.

“Oh,” he said, obviously disappointed.

After a painful silence, Corey asked: “So say I believe you that these video existed before you did that stuff. What’s in the other videos? What is it that bothers you? Is it just the philosophical questions, or do you like run over a hobo in a car?”

“The other videos are more sex stuff,” I told him. “Real vagina sex stuff. And it looks goooood! The kind of sex life I always hoped to have with my husband some day. But ... there are no wedding rings in those videos. And it’s two different guys - black guys.”

“So neither of them is Harry,” Corey said, finishing my thought. “And you’re worried that, if these are destined to come true, it means you’ll break your promise to your dad, and that you and your ‘boyfriend’ Harry will break up?”

I frowned and nodded, worried that I was becoming more emotional that was dignified.

“But,” he added with a hopeful tone, “at least that means that you’ll eventually move on from Harry. You’ll get over him and have awesome sex with someone else, right?”

Corey had never been in love. He didn’t realize how little comfort that was.

“Don’t be mad,” Corey told me at school the next day. “I watched those videos.”

“Seriously, Corey???” I asked, feeling ashamed and a little violated.

“Well, come on,” he said by way of excuse. “This is miraculous shit if what you say is true. This is the impossible happening.”

“Yeah,” I told him, “and it’s also my tits and my ass. God, Corey!”

“Okay, you’re mad. I get that,” he told me. “But here’s the thing: you said there were four videos? Because I found five.”

At lunch I borrowed his laptop to watch the new video. I made him sit twenty feet away from me, but I could still feel his eyes on me.

The new one involved butt sex with a guy I couldn’t see much of, but who definitely wasn’t Harry. It was weird. It started with my double laying face-down on my family room couch, propped up on her elbows, reading a paper edition of The Hobbit (which I’d read like 1000 times before, but always in electronic form). And she didn’t stop reading when the guy casually walked up and pulled down her jogging shorts (which I had never owned) and panties. She lifted her hips to make it easier for him. There were drawings in marker on her butt cheeks: A recurve bow and a flanged mace were clearly visible on one. I couldn’t see the other drawing clearly enough to make it out.

She kept reading while the guy rubbed some sort of jelly between her butt cheeks, and then slipped his cock up her butt with no difficulty, no wincing, and no gasping. And he fucked her. At first she kept reading, but then she set the book down and closed her eyes with a big smile on her face. After a while her hips started jumping and I think she actually came, although she didn’t make any noise. The guy blew his load up in her butt, and then he pulled her shorts back up. The end.

Cory approached cautiously when he could tell I was done watching. He waited for me to talk, which I didn’t want to at first. I wasn’t really mad at him any more: I was mad at the universe for jerking me around. But then I blurted, “Anal sex? Jogging shorts? Seriously, what the hell?”

“I did think of another up-side,” he said tentatively. “At least you know you can’t die until all this stuff happens. It’s like Arthur and Agrajag in Life, the Universe, and Everything.”