Nils showed me an art book he’d bought. We sat on the floor of his dorm room looking at the pictures. Modern Erotica, it said. The pictures were all different styles. We passed one picture but I made him go back. It was of a monster and a girl in a meadow. The girl was on her back, lying in a field of white and yellow flowers, and the monster was on his knees between her legs. His gnarled finger was in her mouth. She was looking up at him. He was roaring at the sky. Clearly he was inside her. Clearly he was coming inside her.

“Do you like that one?” Nils asked.

I bit my lip. “It makes me—I don’t know,” I said. I couldn’t tell him it was making me wet. “She has such red hair,” I said. “Do you think I should color my hair like that?”

“But you have red hair,” Nils said.

“I do, don’t I?” I said.

“You’re so silly,” he said. “Would you like me more if I was like this guy?” he said, his finger jabbing the monster’s face.

“Watch out,” I said, “he has very sharp teeth.”

We laughed together and hugged and kissed.

We’d never done it before. I’d never done it before. And he was so sweet. So caring. And his kisses felt so good. And his touches. Such sweet kisses and touches. I wanted him to—but I wanted to wait too.

We took a break. A walk. A slow walk across the campus and into the cemetery. Just holding hands. Walking. And the fall air felt fresh and clean. The old graves. One had flowers on the stone. Wilted flowers.

“Do you think they were happy—I mean when they were alive,” I asked Nils.

“The flowers?” he said.

“No, the people,” I said.

He said maybe. Sometimes.

“Well, I’m happy,” I told him.

He squeezed my hand. We left the cemetery. On the way back to his dorm we stopped at the Arts Center. We didn’t go in. We just sat on the steps, kissing sometimes. He noticed some flowers growing from a crack. Wildflowers.

“Can I pick them for you?” he asked me.

I knew if he picked them, they’d die, but they were going to die anyway. “Yes, please pick them for me,” I said. Then I changed my mind. “The ones on the gravestone,” I said, “let’s rescue them.”

Back in his room he found a glass for the wilted flowers. We added a little water.

“They’re sweet,” I said. I sniffed them. “They smell good. I think we’ve revived them.”

“You smell good,” he said.

He set the glass with the flowers on the floor, and he undressed me.

“You are so beautiful,” he said.

I undressed him. We were naked. Naked together. Kissing. His penis pressed my belly. I knew I wanted it inside me. I urged him down onto the carpet. He was kneeling between my legs. Like the monster in the picture. My legs were over his shoulders. His finger touched my bottom lip. Soft. Gentle. Back and forth, his finger went. Back and forth. I wanted him to put his finger in my mouth. Like the monster in the picture. He caressed my lip. So sweet. I whimpered. His penis was pressing me there. My cunny slit.

“I’m so wet,” I blurted. “Be in me.”

He pushed. He was in. He was inside me. His finger was in my mouth and his penis was in my cunt. He felt good. My cunt felt good. I felt good. We held still. So still.

“Oh Ami,” he went. He moved, pressing deep. “Oh Ami, I’m going to—”

I sucked his finger hard. It meant, “Yes. Come in me.”

Oh God was it good.

I wanted him in me forever. But eventually...

Even wilted his penis was so cute. I revived him.