Chapter 4: The End at Camp Alpine

On the day before I was supposed to leave Camp Alpine, Molly took me to a diner down the hill in Cresskill. It was about the only time, except for our trip to the Hudson River overlook, that we had been together away from her house. I speculated that this lunch might be the time for our goodbyes to each other. I was very wrong about that.

She didn’t waste any time. As soon as we had ordered, she said, “Hank, you’ve told me that for about a year now you just go out by yourself or with your friends and you don’t have to account to your parents about everywhere you’ve been.”

“That’s mostly true, I just pay my fare and go. I can’t come back around 10:00 PM, however. Not that I have a specific curfew.” I couldn’t be able to get away with coming home that late until I was in college years later. By then I could be gone for an entire night as long as I called home first.

“You told me about your plan to ride the entire New York subway system eventually. That actually sounds pretty cool.”

“Yeah, but perhaps it’s a rather nerdy thing to do. Sometimes we go – I mean me and my friends - to places like Yankee Stadium and once the Museum of Modern Art.” I wasn’t sure what she was getting at.

“So you have friends with some varied interests I see.” I got the feeling she said that merely to assuage any doubts she could sense in me. “Are any of them in your Scout troop?”

“It may seem strange, but my close friends are from school. Maybe I’m ambivalent about being in the Scouts now; I already said I was outgrowing it.” This conversation wasn’t clear to me, so I asked her, as casually as possible, “Why are you asking about all this?”

“Well, I guess this should be obvious – I mean it’s up to you really.”

It wasn’t obvious. For one of the first times ever, I was impatient with her. “Molly, don’t take this the wrong way, but what are you talking about? Or, what do you want from me?” Wow, I must have changed somewhat recently if I’m talking like this to an adult twenty-five years my senior.

I caught her off-balance, but she recovered quickly. “What I want is that you keep coming up here to see me in Alpine. There is the Red and Tan Bus from the terminal, which I admit takes a bit of time but it’s not too bad. Or I could pick you up in Fort Lee or even in Washington Heights.”

It was amazing that I hadn’t anticipated her proposal. The end of my Alpine camping trip, and its implications about Molly, were things that I had refused to even think about. Or, in the back of my mind, I believed that it would be the end of my relationship with her.

Molly went on, “We could go on trips together, like to Bear Mountain. It’s just up the road. Or we could go to Palisades Park.” That was an amusement park just south of Fort Lee.

“Wait a minute, are you serious?”

“Of course I am. You’ve never considered it?”

For a moment I tried to grasp the whole situation. “No, I just put it out of my mind. I didn’t have a plan.”

“I get it, it’s a lot for someone your age to consider.” She was certainly right about that. There I was, about to enter high school, and I had somehow latched on to this older lady as both a friend and lover. At times I found it easier to talk to and confide in her than people my own age. I hadn’t expected that to happen.

Just to have something to say, I commented on the amusement park. “I’ve been to Palisades. It’s sort of run-down, and I hated the freak shows they have there. Those creeped me out; I was only about eleven then.”

“Most of them are faked anyway.”

“I’m not so sure about that two-headed calf.”

“That was very peculiar, I admit. And yes, the place is very old and needs a refurbishing, that’s for sure.” Then she got to her main point again. “Anyway, of course, we could continue our affair here in Alpine.”

I didn’t respond, but she continued, “I know, I’m such a naughty lady! Anyway, that’s what I want. What do you want?”

I knew I had quickly become dependent on her. The more mature part of me appreciated her mind and her good-natured personality, but the adolescent in me – man, continued access to all that sweet pussy and her hot, eager mouth was very appealing. A lewd thought came to me. This Mrs. Jacobson person really knows how to throw her ass around in the most delightful way.

I didn’t say that of course. What came out instead was, “I’m going to be in high school come September, you know that.”

“Of course, and who knows what will happen there.” She took her glasses off; I’m sure she did that so that I could get a better look at her face. She looked very prim and proper, a school teacher, a woman on the verge of early middle age. Maybe only I knew what she was capable of sexually.

Maybe she was on the same train of thought that I was. She said, “Keep in mind that in school you’ll be dealing with a bunch of fourteen-year-old girls.”

“Well, so what?”

“Girls mature faster than boys, so they might not think too highly of classmates of the same age. When you’re older, you might have a better shot at the newer crop of girls.”

“Are you saying they’ll be more interested in the guys in the higher grades?” I was basically just repeating what she had already said.

“I’m sure of it; I see it every fall. Those freshmen girls are not going to be that mature. You’ll be lucky to get the time of day from most of them. But let’s face it, true dating and mating don’t really get rolling until college. Not that there isn’t a lot of fooling around in high schools now too.”

“Ah, so why are you bringing this up?”

I was surprised at her response, “You absolutely cannot breathe a word about being involved with a woman my age. It’s just a very – well, perilous situation for me, I admit that.” I noted that she had already assumed that I had accepted her proposal.

I think I understood more. “You’re saying that I can’t leverage the experiences that I’ve learned from you?” Two weeks earlier I wouldn’t have been able to be so blunt with her.

“You’ve got to be careful about it. Fudge it and tell them you met a girl in your building, or in your neighborhood, over the summer. Tell them that she gives you blowjobs; it’s a bit unlikely that she would have fucked you already at such a young age.” Molly rarely used the work fuck, and it gave me a clue about how agitated she was. “And you’re going to a specialized high school, so it’s not like being in a neighborhood school where everyone is from the same area.”

“I hope I never actually have to produce this non-existent chick.”

“Well, be subtle. Just say you were with her or you are still somehow involved with her.”

“Probably no one will believe me unless they see her.”

“It doesn’t matter. Look, I know that teenaged boys are the biggest tellers of tales when it comes to their imaginary sexual exploits. That makes me think: I wonder what my students would think of me if they knew what I was doing.” She laughed. “They’d probably think I was too old to want sex. Anyway, do you want to go home and think about this or have you already made up your mind about me?”

It struck me that this was going from a campground fling to having a serious thirty-nine-year-old girlfriend. Molly was suggesting that since I had little or no chance with the new girls at my school, it would be better to stick with her for a while. She was proposing herself as a sexual and romantic alternative for me.