Chapter 76

Alphqwe provided the following, many thanks!!!!

My wife and I have started role playing in the bedroom, her favorite is sexy Liberian. She reads a book and I have to sit quietly.

I went to a psychic last week and was told that I would soon come into money. Last night I made it with a girl named Penny!

From the wilds of the internet! Anonymous 1, “Is there sex after death?” Anonymous 2, “That depends on what kind of person your coroner is.”

Three generations of prostitutes were having a drink when the youngest said “If I’m lucky I can get $75:00 for a blowjob.” Her mother laughed and said “When I was your age I was glad to get $15.00 for one!” The grandmother took a shot of whiskey and declared “Damn! When I was as young as my granddaughter I was happy to have something warm to drink!”

Every day Betty would go to her husband’s grave and water the flowers she had planted next to it. When she was done she left walking backwards from the grave. One day her friend Alice said to her “I can understand why you go to his grave everyday but why do you walk backwards when you leave?” “Because he told me many times that I had such a great looking ass that it would bring a dead man back from the dead.” Betty responded, “I’m so happy where he is right now that I’m not going to take any chances that he might be right!”

Well I finally convinced my son that the word Vigina wasn’t a dirty word, so he named his new female puppy Virgina!

Mommy I saw you bouncing on Daddies belly last night. Why were you doing that?” asked little Timmy. “Because it helps him to stay skinny, if I don’t he’ll get fat. “his mom replied. “It’s not going to work mommy, Tina the babysitter keeps blowing him up again.”