Chapter 31

“Because I think I’m a pervert,” Eitan said, waving his free arm as he pressed his cell harder against his ear.

“Well, that does add a little spice to it,” Akemi said.

She giggled; she never giggled, Eitan realized as he listened on the other end of the phone. “Are you flirting with me?”

“Flirting with you, Eitan? No, you are much too serious for that,” Akemi said. Her giggle turned into a laugh. “I’m jerking your chain to keep you on your toes. Maybe you will get it this time.”

“Forget what ‘it’ is for the moment,” Eitan said before swallowing, “If we are so close that we should have been banging away for years, why didn’t we bang in high school when we had the time, the place and the privacy?”

“Nikki and Joseph asked me not to throw you down and ravish you,” Akemi said. “I was pretty aggressive then, you know. I was like a spider sucking my victims dry.”

“Then?” Eitan replied, shaking his head and rolling his eyes at the same time. Then another thought occurred to him, “victims?”

“Yeah, that’s why our parents told me that if I loved you, then I had to let both of us grow up before we ripped the bedsheets together. Eitan, before you perforate your guts from the inside out, Nikki and Joseph promised me that they would sit you down and give you the talk when you were ready. They double downed on their promise just before Whitcomb pulled his stunt and everyone had to flee. The entire family has just been trying to hold our shit together ever since while the world goes kablooie and the three of us ... change. The people who know us best still believe in us.”

“Huh.”

“It’s not just us, Eitan. Did you ever stop to wonder how Tanisha found Sten again?” Akemi asked. “Nothing despicable, but someone either put the notion in her head or gave her a heads up on where to find him. Maybe she brought him up and the other person said, ‘Hey, I hear he’s at Stanford. Something else innocuous was said, which set her on her quick search for stud muffin.”

“He’s happy and she’s happy,” Eitan said, as he thought through the chain of causation. “You think Dr. H is a matchmaker?”

“I think Camille is, and Dr. H pays her salary,” Akemi said. “She did pluck him out of peril and hide him away.”

“Then Dr. H is still around and taking actions,” Eitan said, “if you’re right.”

“You’re changing the subject,” Akemi said, the accusation clear in her voice.

“No,” Eitan said. “I’m thinking how much our lives have been cultivated like plants in a greenhouse. I know Nikki and Joseph did their best to protect us, but they still went along with the program.”

“They loved us,” Akemi said. “They love us still. They’re too far away to help us though. Do I have to give you the talk that they could not?”

“Akemi, I need you so much that I cannot put it into words,” Eitan said, wiping tears from both eyes. He was relieved they were not on video chat. “Come back to Mystic. I think it’s safe enough to chance it.”

“There are a few steps, first,” Akemi said, her professional voice coming back online. “You have to decide whether to bring Reggie into the cohort. You can’t leave him dangling.”

“Most of the cohort is already schtupping one or another,” Eitan said, pointing out the obvious flaw.

“You need to finish reconciliating with Kavita,” she continued. “Send her chocolate. You need to expand the cohort, settle on a central location for us to establish a headquarters, and you need to pay your estimated taxes or file for an extension.”

“Just when I decide I can’t live without you, you have me screaming as I run out the back door, ‘leave me alone.’” He burbled his lips. “We should use Reggie’s yacht in Mystic for an annual meeting this year. I’m mostly resigned to the fact that we will be responsible for finding him a girlfriend; his taste tends towards big tits as his top three priorities. He’s smart enough to read the writing on the wall and he is loyal. What was that?”

“My friend needs her phone back,” Akemi said. “I’m done with being a military or an intelligence asset, Eitan. I’m leaving and I will meet you in Mystic. Then it’s our time, at least some of it. Bye.”