Chapter 5

Whatever, as I said, the day at the Zoo seemed to go very well. Except for the fact that it appeared to me that Celine and Tarra may have bonded far too well for my own good. I had thought the day was about the children and to an extent it was. But at the same time I got the distinct suspicion that I was being ganged-up on.

When I look back now, I can see that the two women were working to a completely different game plan to anything I’d been expecting, and one that I would never ever have envisaged.

On we arriving back home -- both women had ... pooh-poohed my suggestion of having dinner-out that evening, announcing that the children were too tired. I kind of wondered what three little urchins Celine and Tarra were talking about; the children still sounded ‘full of it’ to me. Anyway Celine and Tarra took over the kitchen and prepared our evening meal between them. It was made painfully clear to me that my assistance in the kitchen was not required; albeit politely.

I was dismissed with the words. “You have to cook every evening Ralph, you go and relax dear; Tarra and I have everything in hand.”

The three youngsters having ensconced themselves in front the big screen TV the day room -- watching some inane show -- I retreated to my study, still trying to figure out exactly what was ‘going down!’ Whatever it was I was definitely no longer anywhere near being in the driving seat and I really did not like that situation.

It was after dinner that evening that it dawned on me that Tarra and Penny were not going home. Actually it was the little ones who let the cat out of the bag. I really do believe that Celine and Tarra hadn’t intended to tell me at all.

“We need to talk to you Ralph and we can’t do that until the children are safely out of the way, tucked up in bed asleep.” Celine had said when I tackled her.

I sort-of gathered that the “we” Celine had been referring to was Tarra and herself, but she appeared to be in no mood to elaborate.

It was gone eleven that I found myself sitting at one end of our dinning table, nursing a large Scotch; while Tarra and Celine were seated opposite each other at the other end, sharing a bottle of wine.

It was Tarra who spoke first.

“Well Rolly, you’ve got yourself a mighty lot of explaining to do, haven’t you luvver?”

No that wasn’t a question; Tarra’s tone informed me that it was a statement. My agreement or disagreement was a superfluous point.

“Sorry?” I replied, literally wondering what the hell Tarra was talking about. And what had brought the term luvver back into use. That word that once, overheard by a teacher, had got the pair of us into really deep hot water once in our lives.

“Well, it’s like this, Rolly. Celine tells me that you’ve been accusing her of ... being a little free with her affections while she’s away on her business trips. Is that correct?”

“Um yeah, you could say that.” I agreed.

“There’s no could, about it, Rolly. You all-but said the same thing to me last Saturday evening.” Tarra insisted.

“I’d hit the juice a little heavy last Saturday night, Tarra.” I replied.

“Saturday? You had a bleeding skin-full on Sunday as well!” Celine butted in.

It was Celine’s use of the word “bleeding” that that made the strongest impression on my mind. Unlike the Tarra I remember from my school days, Celine does not habitually use coarse language. Celine’s description, I might add.

“Be quite please, Celine. I told you when the male ego feels threatened; they resort to all kinds of silly tactics. Anyway, you’ll get your turn in a minute.” Tarra chastised my wife. Then she turned to look me in the eye again.

“Okay Rolly, what hard evidence have you got that your wife has done anything that she shouldn’t have done? Besides behaving like a complete numpty with Gavin Tarrent, last Saturday evening, that is. And everybody could see that was a wind-up!”

Tarra’s eyes flashed back to Celine. “Christ Celine, surely you could have come-up with someone a little more convincing the Tarrent! You didn’t have me fooled for a minute.”

Celine blushed. “He just happened to be handy, and he’s been after getting into--- my virtue for years, Tarra. It was just a matter of who was available.”

“Well you could do better than Tarrent any day of the week Celine; take my word for that! Anyway Rolly, the point is, you have no real evidence that Celine has ever done anything to betray you, have you. All you’ve got is a weird scenario you’ve conjured-up in that twisted mind of yours.”

“Well to be honest with you, Tarra. No, none whatsoever. I ---” I was replying, but suddenly Celine cut me off.”

“It was all my fault, Tarra.” Celine interjected, “Rolly is perfectly correct, I got lost in my job and I started to take him and our happy home for granted.”

That took me by surprise, because never before had I heard Celine refer to me by my old school nickname of Rolly. In fact the only person I could think of who did still use the name was Tarra.

“Although I got to say, part of blame must fall upon his own shoulders”. Celine continued.

Yep, I thought to myself. Standard female practice; pretend to concede defeat and then attack while the going is good. Celine didn’t fool me for a second. Okay maybe I did nearly swallowed it.

“The man is just too bloody good at his job. By that I mean looking after the home and the twins. Doing all the cooking and the cleaning. I just didn’t feel I was needed here anymore; it started to become a place I visited outside working hours. I think I was trying to exert some authority over the home when I made decisions like buying that bloody Ford, Rolly hates so much.”

There it was again, the word ‘bloody.’ But, Celine was still speaking.

“And yes, I really have to admit, that that ‘little spouse at home’ might have crept into my mindset. But I didn’t realise it had until you pointed it out to me, Ralph, I’m sorry. You were thinking about the home and I was thinking about nothing but my responsibilities at the office. I was wrong and I think I can understand how it looked from your perspective. Very often when I spoke to you and the children on the telephone there were other people present in the room. I just had to fit those calls in where I could, into some heavy and chaotic work schedules. It was like I was just fulfilling my family commitments. I never should have done that and I’m extremely sorry that I shared what should have been our private, family conversations with my work colleagues. But please believe me Ralph, there were no illicit liaisons; I’ll swear to that, on our children’s lives!”

“Oh come-on?” Tarra interjected quite forcefully. “Are you trying to kid us that no one ever sneaked the old snog out of you, when you’d a few drinks at some of those parties? And what about, some randy bugger grinding his crotch into you on the dance floor, like that snake Tarrent did the other night? You can’t say that didn’t make you feel horny.”

‘Oh, so you are playing in my corner now Tarra, good girl’. I thought.

Celine’s face turned bright pink. For a moment I couldn’t tell if was from embarrassment or rage, but then she almost shouted.

“Of course it bloody did! Just like you two got all hot under the collar dancing at the party the other night.”

“So, what did you do about it, Celine? When those guys tried to turn you on.” Tarra demanded, so forcefully that she was almost shouting and I became worried that she might wake the children.

“I’d go up to my room and frig myself silly, did you think I would? What do you about it yourself, Tarra?” Celine demanded.

“Same bloody thing as you do, girl.” Tarra grinned back at her. “That’s if there ain’t a decent spare cock lying about that I fancy. But I have got a couple real nice dildos for when there isn’t.” Tarra smiled at Celine.

“To much information, Tarra.” I tried to intercede.

“Rolly, just sit there and keep your bloody stupid mouth shut, will you! We’re just getting to the interesting stuff aren’t we, Celine?

I sat there feeling like a chastised schoolchild and Celine didn’t reply; she just sat there with what I can only describe as a coy expression on her face.

“Come on Celine, you were quite happy to tell me yesterday. You never need to look for any spare cock either, do you? And why is that? Because you’ve got a very special little friend that you take to bed with you, haven’t you, Celine?”

Celine nodded, but didn’t speak.

“Okay, come on Celine, spit it out. Tell us what this special friend’s name is?”

I had no idea where Tarra was going and it began to concern me.

Celine mumbled something, much too quietly for me to hear.

“Louder Celine. Tell Ralphy the name of the friend you take to bed each night when he’s not around?” Tarra demanded.

“Rolly, okay. Are you happy now?” Celine shouted and burst into tears.

“What are you crying for, Celine. Don’t you think your husband would be relieved, proud even, to hear that you name the toy you diddle yourself silly with every night, is named after him. And Ralph, you probably won’t believe this. And I do have to admit that I’m only really working from memory of course, albeit a memory refreshed by some degree by the little dance we enjoyed at the party. But I thought Celine’s Rolly is a bleeding close match to that hunk of man meat you’ve got hanging between your legs. Only it weren’t exactly hanging when I felt it pushed into me the other night. By Christ did you make me horny, I went straight home and frigged myself silly.”

But then Tarra’s tone seemed to change again as moved her attention from Celine to me.

“Rolly, I left that party right after you two, really only stopping long enough to kick that Tarrent dickhead in the right in the privates. I had to wait until he dropped his guard, he’d nearly shit his pants, you know. He thought you might come back and sort him out”.

I went to speak, but Tarra silenced with one her hand gestures.

“Not now Rolly, the night is getting away from us.” Tarra continued. “Anyway I spent the rest of the night, after relieving myself of sexual tension our little dance put me under. You are a pain in the arse you know Rolly, you’ve always done that to me. Anyway as I was saying I spent the rest of the night on the telephone to people I know in the business, and people whose business it is to know who sleeping with whom, in the business as well.”

I have to admit that that was a mouthful from Tarra that I had to think about twice, but she was still talking.