Chapter 6: Something Wonderful

Maddox chewed on his gum mindlessly while letting his mind wander off. These days, he was off most of the time as he seemed incapable of getting that thing with Jonathan out of his head. He had turned into the equivalent of a socially inadequate porcupine, and people preferred to get out of his way, allowing him the needed berth for him to work out of his system whatever he needed to work out of his system.

The problem was he had no idea how to work it out. Well, rejection fucking stung, and since it was for the first time in his life he suffered it when it mattered, he felt utterly messed up. Each time he closed his eyes, he could only see Jonathan’s climax face turning into stone in the blink of an eye. Had he been, what? Disgusted? What of him could cause that kind of reaction in a person?

Was it weird that he didn’t know about it because he couldn’t see it, and other people didn’t care to tell him because they pitied him? Maddox had examined himself in the mirror in all possible ways and couldn’t see it if it killed him.

He barely registered as Kane plunked by his side on the sofa in the living room. Instead of offering a greeting, he barely let out a grunt.

Kane sighed and placed a hand on his knee. Oh, no, that had to be some kind of intervention. “Deedee,” his friend called softly, “what exactly is this girl doing to you to make you so messed up?”

And he had just pulled the ‘Deedee’ card on him, which was something Kane did only when he wanted to have heartfelt conversations. Because he’d had a girlfriend for three years, he was the only one in their group who seemed to have developed extra skills, all dealing with emotional stuff, which everyone hated when it was used on them but appreciated for being actually helpful.

“There’s no girl,” he mumbled.

“If there’s no girl, you’re really starting to scare me. Is someone in your family ill or something?”

He couldn’t lie about serious stuff like that. “It’s a girl,” he said reluctantly. He wasn’t yet at the point when he could admit to his friends that he was crushing on a dude.

“All right.” Kane exhaled. “So, you dig her, and she doesn’t dig you back?”

“Something like that,” Maddox mumbled and began munching on a hangnail.

Kane grabbed his arm and forced it down. “I’m not just going to tell you that you need to talk. I’m actually going to interrogate you.”

Ha! Like that would scare him. He looked down stubbornly.

“All right,” Kane said with a sigh, “let’s start. Was she, like, hands off, dude, from the start, or something?”

Maddox swung his head from one side to the other. “Not ... really. We ... well, touched each other and stuff.” Good thing he hadn’t just blurted out something insane like having had jerked off with the imaginary girl.

“Ah, so she must be at least a little into you. What makes you think she doesn’t like you?”

‘She’ had run away with Maddox’s cum on ‘her’ like there was a rocket in ‘her’ butt. But he couldn’t say that outright.

“She’s like distant and stuff,” Maddox replied.

“Is there something going on in her life right now? Maybe she doesn’t feel like hooking up is a good idea for her right now.”

“It’s more than hooking up,” Maddox replied in an irritated voice and then instantly wished that he could take the words back.

“Really?” Kane’s eyes lit up for a moment. “Since when?”

“Since it’s about her. I mean, I don’t know! Can we not have this conversation?” Maddox whined.

“No, we cannot not have this conversation,” Kane replied firmly. “So, it’s serious. Our little boy is finally growing up.”

“Shut up, lifer,” Maddox replied. “I don’t know what it is. Maybe if I hooked up with her, I’d be over it.”

Maybe.

Oh, what a big fat ‘maybe’. Would once be enough to check off the list all the things he wanted to do with Jonathan, to Jonathan, and around Jonathan? It would have to be a pretty long hookup, and it should happen without his dick falling off at the end from coming too many times.

“What if she’s not into hooking up?” Kane asked.

“She could be,” Maddox said with a shrug.

“You don’t know a lot about this girl, do you?”

Through no fault of his own. He wanted to get to know Jonathan a great deal more, but who could hold down that guy for more than a couple of minutes which had been the most he had gotten when meeting him across the campus and exchanging no more than a few superficial lines?

“What if she’s not into boys?” Kane asked. “You know how long it took Louise’s sister to come out. It was hard for her, and she tried to deny her true self for a long time before she decided she was done with hiding.”

Louise was Kane’s girlfriend, and her big sis had only last year come out to their parents. It had been quite difficult for her to admit it, especially to herself, as Kane had told them later.

“Oh, don’t worry, she’s into boys. She’s just not into me. There’s something wrong with me,” Maddox said the last words, and his mind went reeling. “It is something wrong with me,” he repeated.

“Hey, hey, slow down, what could be wrong with you? You’re a handsome mofo, you’re fun, and you clearly want her,” Kane offered his input right away.

“But I’m a player,” Maddox said like he finally saw the light. “She must think I’m a walking STD.”

“Wow, wow,” Kane began, clearly stunned by that evolution of their conversation. “You always use protection, right?”

“Of course I do, but she doesn’t know it. That’s it. This is what I have to do.”

“What exactly? Tell her that you’re a condom type of guy? I assume she is, too, if she has her head on her shoulders, so --”

“I’m going to get tested, and then I’m going to shove that thing right under his nose!” Maddox smacked his right palm with his left fist.

“His?” Kane asked.

“What?”

“You said ‘his nose’.”

“No, I didn’t,” Maddox denied.

Kane blinked a couple of times. “I either heard it wrong, or you’re more fucked up than I imagined. Which you clearly are. Well, get tested if that’s going to give you peace of mind. But, as a friend, I must tell you that the chances are that her reluctance to get with you might not have anything to do with it. The entire campus knows you’re the poster boy for safe sex. So, she must know it, too.”

Maddox stood abruptly, no longer hearing whatever Kane was blabbing about.

“Are you going right now?”

“The sooner, the better.”

If Kane had other heartfelt things to say, Maddox would just listen to them another time.

Jonathan dreaded the day when he had Statistics for a good reason. So far, he had managed to stay clear of Maddox and just exchange a few words whenever they met under the pretext that he always needed to be somewhere. Also, there was the project they had to be working on together, so sooner or later, they would find themselves face to face.

The worst part was that Maddox looked like there was something serious bothering him. Since he had perked up his ears whenever Ray talked about the latest news being churned by the gossip mill, he knew that nothing untoward had happened to him except for their little late-at-night tryst at the pool.

After several days, Maddox should have been over it. He was popular, handsome, everyone liked him, and there were dozens of girls who wouldn’t mind, surely, to make him forget about almost being dropped on his ass by a guy he had masturbated with for the fun of it.

At first, he had tried to shake off the feeling of guilt by telling himself that Maddox should get used to a bit of rejection in his perfect life. But seeing those pretty gray eyes filled with longing and suffering surely didn’t support his case. If he could help it, he wanted Maddox to not suffer one moment for as long as he lived.

But what was he to do? Tell him that it was all fine? But what if Maddox then wanted a repeat experience? No, that was definitely out of the question. Jonathan felt that he had committed a huge mistake by giving in to the temptation once. Maddox was addictive if one were unfortunate enough to do as little as look at him and bask for a moment in that pretty boy smile. And now that he knew how Maddox looked in the throes of pleasure, he was completely doomed.

He had himself to consider, he tried to speak to that rational part of him that still lay in there, somewhere. What would happen if he let Maddox in? The straight boy would have his fun and then move on. And that was the best of all scenarios. No guy with such a track record in getting girls would, all of a sudden, decide to settle for a relationship with a gay guy.

A groan made its way up his throat as he found his way to the last row, as usual. He wasn’t allowed even to consider such a possibility. At best, at the absolute best, Maddox just wanted to fool around, jerk off, experiment a little, maybe, check all that off his list, and then move on to his usual womanizing.

Jonathan was insane even to consider that there was more to it than that. Nonetheless, he had made things awkward enough between them by accepting that mutual masturbation and then by fleeing the scene in that manner. He would have to make things right somehow, and that without leaving room for interpretations.

His breath caught in his chest when he saw Maddox entering the lecture hall. He looked better, and his usual cocky smile was back where it belonged. Well, it had been a few rough days, but it appeared that Maddox was finally over it, which was good.

Yes, it was good, he decided and repeated the thing a few times in his head. Until his eyes crossed with Maddox’s, and the smug grin that was clearly addressed to him made his heart skip a beat. What was that all about now? A wink followed, and then Maddox plopped himself into his seat, leaving Jonathan with all the questions.

He loved Statistics, but it seemed like he would have a hard time focusing on the lecture again just because that guy was in the same room. His phone buzzed quietly, and he frowned. After stealing a few glances around, he surreptitiously took it and checked the screen.

Today, after classes, you and I, at the library, it’s on. We’ll work on it.

Ah, the project, of course. Jonathan typed a quick ‘K’ and then put the phone away as cautiously as he could. Then he stared at Maddox just as the guy turned his head and flashed a smile at him. Somehow, he couldn’t stop thinking that smile could announce nothing good.

What kind of torture was in store for him now?

Maddox could barely hold in his excitement as he entered the library and spotted Jonathan at a table, working on his laptop, those sexy glasses on, and wearing a serious expression on his face. He walked over, and in one fell swoop, produced the copy he had requested from the medical office where he had had his tests done. “Read them and weep,” he said with emphasis and plopped into the seat across from Jonathan.

His eyes were like a hawk’s as he observed the other picking the paper and giving it a long and thoughtful look.

“What’s this?” Jonathan asked.

Maddox placed his hands behind his head, stretched, and offered a lopsided grin. “It says right there that my cum is not radioactive.”

“Um, congratulations?” Jonathan’s lips curled into a small confused smile.

Maddox leaned forward abruptly and whispered, “I haven’t been with a girl since the beginning of summer.”

“Well, I saw you with my own eyes with a cute blond girl at the party the first Saturday of the semester,” Jonathan pointed out.

“So you noticed. You must have been looking for me, then,” Maddox said with a grin.

“Don’t be absurd. Everyone noticed. It’s not like you’re any less than a superstar wherever you go, let alone a party.”

Well, it was a compliment, and he was willing to take it. However, he needed to clear any misunderstandings.

“Nothing happened with her.” Maddox waved impatiently. “It was the night my dog died. And by that, I actually mean the other thing that starts with a ‘d’ and is also man’s best friend.”

The confusion in Jonathan’s eyes was beyond hilarious, but Maddox didn’t want to jinx it somehow by laughing in the guy’s face.

“Oh, you mean ... oh,” Jonathan said slowly. “It ... died? But I’m sure it was in perfect working order the night we --” He stopped abruptly and bit his lower lip in the most adorable way. Maddox had a mind to ask him if he was allowed to bite it in Jonathan’s stead. He was so damned sure it had to be delicious.

“Yeap, all ‘cause of you,” Maddox drawled each word while taking in each of the other’s reactions.

“Because of me?”

Oh, man, how could he be so oblivious? But that just made him so much cuter that Maddox wanted to lean over the table and smooch him until both were breathless. And then, those amber eyes would look all shiny and hazy, and Maddox would just take his time tasting each lip at a time, each corner, inside and out --