Chapter 1

There was a knock at the door.

I grinned. How many novels, good and bad, either started with that sentence or have it figure prominently in the story? Well, at least it wasn’t a ‘dark and stormy night’. I didn’t get a lot of visitors because I lived down a private dirt road, although there was one stubbornly pesistent Brownie who made her mother bring her every year. I admired her spunk and determination. Whoever her lifemate turned out to be better be made of stern stuff.

After the first trip I bought ten boxes every time, giving them away at work. Usually during the closing days of her drive she’d appear again. “I need four more box sales to be number one. What kind you want, Mr. Grumpy?” If she needed four, I would buy eight. I think I’m personally responsible for the ten extra pounds my receptionist can’t seem to lose.

She’d asked me what my name was once and I grimaced and said “Grumpy.” She giggled and called me Mr. Grumpy for the rest of the time I knew her. She was twelve now, a full blown Girl Scout who couldn’t wait until she joined with the boys, to do what she called “cool stuff”. God help those lads.

It wasn’t my little Scout, but it was a little girl. Eleven, twelve maybe? I was terrible at guessing the ages of children. Not around them enough I guess. She was a bit disheveled and sweating and I noticed a beat up bike sitting at the edge of the porch. She was kind of cute, blond hair in a ponytail, neat little top and cut off shorts with what looked like brand new trainers on her feet. Oddly for a blond, she had brown eyes, and a cute little upturned nose. She reminded me of someone but I couldn’t quite put my finger on who. One of my friends, I suspect. She looked a little impatient so I spoke.

“Something I can do for you, kid?”

“Yeah. If you’re Kyle Masters you can invite me in, give me a towel and something cool to drink. And you need to spit in this tube.”

“Who the he ... heck are you, kid? Why are you botherin’ me?”

She looked scared to death but determined as hell. “Well, you’re probably my father. That’s why I need you to spit in this cup. I need to know. My name is Kinsey.”

It hit me then like a ton of bricks. I knew who she looked like.

...

“Kid, that’s a hell of a way to show up at a man’s doorstep. Tell me, what’s your mother’s name?”

“Alistar Smith, but you probably knew her as Alistar Snead, when she was with you.”

I looked around nervously. Ali was a psychotic bitch I’d lived with for six months thirteen years ago. I reached in the house and flipped the switch, sighing as the porch fans came on. If she was anything like her mother there wasn’t a chance in hell I was going to let her in the house. Just to be sure I hit the keypad beside the light switch and activated my security system. From this point forwards there was going to be a video and audio record of everything done and said.

I pointed at the rattan love seat. “Sit there. The cushions are in that cabinet against the wall. Lemonade all right?”

She smiled for the first time. It was a very nice smile. “That would be great. I haven’t had anything to eat since breakfast so you need to feed me. Oh, and a bottle of water would be nice.”

I left her and went into the kitchen, hitting speed dial. My best bud and personal lawyer answered after the first ring. “What?”

“Get your ass over here. I might need you.”

He sighed. “Do I need to bring bail money?”

“I don’t think so, but I sure need you on this. I got a little surprise for you.”

“Fine. See you in twenty. I’m going to charge your ass off for screwing up my Saturday, just so you know.”

I was working while I talked, getting out the lemonade and glasses, some crackers, cheeses, cold cuts, and a few pieces of fruit. I threw a bottle of water on the tray and picked up two big towels. I didn’t want her sweating on my new cushions.

She had chosen the swing, piling the cushions on and swaying back and forth. The kid was singing, doing pretty good until she heard the screen door slam. She sat up and I placed the tray on the nearest table. She grabbed the water and chugged it down. Then she used the towels, tossing them down when she was done. She saw my expression and grinned. “Grandma said you were a neat freak.”

“Your grandmother was such a stranger to cleaning equipment she thought a vacuum cleaner was an air assisted dil..., well, she wasn’t very neat.”

“Still isn’t. Don’t worry, I’ll fold them when I’m done. Right now I’m starved.” She took the platter, starting with the cheese and ending up with an apple. The platter was almost completely empty when she finished. She burped and flushed a little before grinning.

“I figured you’d feed me some type of mystery meat that was red and still squirming. You’re not gay, are you?”

I couldn’t help smiling. Whatever was on this kid’s mind came out her mouth. No filters at all. “Does eating healthy equate to homosexuality? I’m not gay. If you were here later I’d pile a plate full of the flesh of dead cows, pigs, and chickens, just for you. Your timing sucks.”

I looked her over. “You’re your mother made over.”

“Gran says I have your nose.”

I reached up and stroked my nose, feeling the bumps and lumps. It had been broken three times and I’d survived a motorcycle wreck which ground the fist half inch off. That was a painful reconstruction. “I hope not. Mine seems to attract all kinds of pain.”

Before the conversation could continue my friend and lawyer Jason showed up, driving a Cadillac Escalade I was pretty sure he got partially with money I’d paid him over the years. He eyed the situation warily. The last thing he expected was a kid sitting on my porch. I stood, grinning.

“Jason, let me introduce you to my guest. This is Kinsey ... Masters?”

Jason sort of blanched and looked more closely at Kinsey. He looked up at me shaking his head. “Is she...”

“Alistar’s daughter? She says she is and she thinks I’m the sperm donor. She even has a tube she wants me to spit in. Should I?”

“You should not do anything I don’t tell you to do. Miss Kinsey, what makes you think my friend is your father?”

“Gran says he is, and I badgered Mom until she said it could be but she didn’t think so. I just want to know, you know? Every kid should know who her father is.”

She seemed so earnest it hurt a little. “Listen, ki ... Kinsey, you know you’re a complete surprise, right? I never knew you existed. If I had I’d have tracked the bi ... your mother down and found out for sure. Gotta tell you, this brings back memories I had buried years ago. Not so good memories.”

Kinsey sighed, looking so lost and alone I wanted to hug her. Hug her? Where did that come from? I didn’t even like kids. Well, I wasn’t sure, the only children I had been around on a consistent basis were my niece and nephew, and that was only when my sister needed money. They were ill mannered little brats that would take everything that wasn’t nailed down if I didn’t watch them. I know I didn’t like them. I usually just gave her money so they would all go away.

“I don’t want anything from you. I won’t ask for money or anything like that. I just want to know. I already talked to two possible fathers. One slammed the door on me and the other wanted me to come inside. He gave off such a creepy vibe I just ran. I’m really hoping it wasn’t one of them. I caught Gran one night when she’d had a few, crying on her shoulder, and that’s when she told me about you. Mom had a duck when I asked about you. She really does not like you but she wouldn’t say why. She absolutely forbid me to look for you.”

Jason was listening intently. “Does she know you’re here? Will she kick up a fuss when she finds out? How far away do you live, anyway? Think she’ll call the cops?”

Kinsey gave a bitter laugh. “She had a pretty late night. I think it was around four when she stumbled in. I left at seven and she was snoring like mad. She won’t be up for another two or three hours. I don’t think she’ll call the cops, she’ll probably think I’m with Gran.”

“Does she leave you by yourself a lot?” Jason had an innocent expression on his face when he asked.

She was pretty sharp for a youngster. “That would be none of your business. Besides, I’m twelve, I can take care of myself. I’m pretty responsible.”

“Yeah, knocking on the doors of strange men while you’re alone seems pretty mature to me. Jesus kid, sh ... stuff could have happened, you know.” I couldn’t resist throwing that out.

She grinned. “You cuss a lot, don’t you? You can if you want. I hear it on a pretty regular basis. Besides, I can run pretty fast.”

“Don’t matter how fast you can run if you’re in arm’s reach. Never mind that now. You never did say where you lived.”

“I live just the other side of Evansville.”

“Evansville! That’s what, thirty miles away? You rode that far?”

“I lived there, you lived here. What choice did I have? Mom or Gran wouldn’t have brought me. I had to Goggle you to get your address. I’m here now. Would you please give me a sample?”

Jason jumped back in. “I have a better idea. Why don’t you give a sample and we’ll have it compared.”

She didn’t like that much. “Oh no, then all you’d have to do would be lie about the results or not take the test at all. I’d much rather do it my way.”

“As his lawyer, I advise him against it. Why open that can of worms?”

They argued back and forth for a few minutes before I made them stop. “Look, Jason, if it was you, wouldn’t you like to know? Her mother hasn’t hit me with child support so she obviously doesn’t want me to have anything to do with her. Besides, I’m not one of those deadbeat fathers you chase. If the kid’s mine I’ll step up. I’m gonna do it, but I want my own set of samples to send to a lab of our choosing. We’ll go from there. Good enough, kid?”

She looked at me and started crying. Shit, what do I do now? I looked at Jason and he grinned, indicating with his eyes I should go to her. I sat down awkwardly on the swing and she was on my lap instantly, hugging me like she was afraid I’d disappear. It felt ... good? Not unpleasant, at least. What the fuck had I gotten myself into?

...

She finally stopped crying. Jason took the scene in with a huge grin on his face. “You’re in it now, boy. You just don’t know it yet. Come on, let’s get these samples sorted, a set for each. Kinsey, how were you going to pay for the tests?”

She got a stubborn set to her jaw. The expression reminded me of my mother. Oh hell! Mom! How was I gonna tell her about this? “I’ll find the money.”

Jason grinned. “I’m sure my client will pay. You get one lab and we’ll choose another. Fair enough? You know your mother has to consent to this, right? It wouldn’t be legal if we didn’t. THAT would probably take a court order. In the mean time, if you were to, say, leave a sample on a glass or something, and we did it without your consent, just for the heck of it, you would have no knowledge of that and can’t be held responsible.”

Kinsey was pretty sharp on the uptake. She dumped the ice out of her lemonade glass and spit in it about six times before sitting it back on the table. “You are gonna wash that after I leave, aren’t you?”

“Absolutely. Now I think you should go home. Don’t think I’m running you off, kid. We’ll definitely be seeing each other again. I just need to digest this for a while.”

Kinsey sighed. “You’re right. It took me four and a half hours to get here. I’ll be lucky if I get back before dark.” She hugged Jason and thanked him for his advice. She turned to hug me but I was gone. Two minutes later I pulled the ‘71 Stingray out of the garage and got out, putting the top down. Her eyes were huge.

“That’s your car?”

“One of ‘em. Get in, I’m driving you home.”

“How we gonna haul my bike?”

“We’re not. Kid, that bike has seen better days. The tires are so thin I can see the air in them. I’m surprised you made it here.”

She got that stubborn look again. “It’s all I got and I need it to get around. Mom doesn’t exactly give me rides when I need them.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll make sure you get your wheels. Look me in the eye and say you believe me.”

She stared for a minute before lowering her eyes. “I believe you ... Dad.”

The words took me by surprise but I liked hearing them. “Let’s make that provisional Dad. We still have to have the tests done.”

Her grin was back. “I’m your kid. You know it, I know it. I’ve been waiting to meet you all my life.”

Damn, Jason must have stirred the dust up. It was gettin’ in my eyes. “Kid, get in the car.”

She slid in and we took off. I like to drive fast and I cranked it up when we hit the interstate. A trip that took her half a day by bike was completed in less than an hour in the ‘vette. She whooped and laughed, turned the radio to some shit station and started singing along, loudly. Luckily, she hadn’t inherited my singing voice.

Kinsey got quiet when I stopped at the superstore a short distance from her house. “Get out, kid. I got to pick some things up.”

She followed me to the sporting goods section. When we got to the bikes I pointed. “Pick one out. My kid or not, you need a decent bike. Don’t worry about the cost, get the one that suits you most. Consider it payment for an enlightening afternoon if nothing else.”

I figured she’d go for one of the fancy eighteen speed mountain bikes. Instead, she picked out an old fashioned bike, pink with white tires. It was a five speed and came with a set of canvas saddlebags and a big basket. If it’s what she wanted, it was what she got.

I paid for it, got a manager and had him put it in customer pickup for her, explaining we were in a car and couldn’t haul it home. We were walking out when I asked her if she thought her Mom would mind if I called her. She hung her head and said she didn’t have a cell. Fifteen minutes later she was the proud owner of a new phone, one of those pay monthly jobs that still had a lot of bells and whistles. I told her I’d foot the bills if it turned out we were related. She promised to keep it hidden from her mother. She didn’t realize I’d stopped until she turned around.

“What?”

“You will not lie to your mother. I’m taking you home and your Mom and I will have a nice talk. I’ll explain that you need the phone and I got it for you, along with the bike. I’m sure she’ll bi ... complain, but I think we can come to an agreement.”

Her expression seemed to say ‘good luck with that’. As we got closer to her house she became more and more nervous. I laid it out for her. “When we get there you stay out of the discussion. This is between me and your Mom, you understand? If you are mine, and honestly I think you are, she has a lot of explaining to do. We’ll probably get loud and there will most likely be words spoken not fit for a young girl.”

She smirked. “I doubt if I hear anything new.”

“You might be surprised. I can be a bit creative with words.”

We turned into the driveway. The house was in a marginal neighborhood, but the yard was mowed and there were no junkers decorating the landscape. I looked at the fading paint and memories I’d buried for years surged out.

...

She was the hottest thing I’d ever seen. Long blond hair that she liked to whip around when she was dancing. Most never noticed though, being too busy watching her ass shake and her boobs fly around. She didn’t like bras. Not much for wearing panties either, if she had a dress on. I didn’t find that until later.

Normally I wouldn’t be in a club like this, but the guy who owed me money said if I wanted it tonight to swing by the club and he’d pay me. Normally I would have left it to him, but I had a deal cooking and was pretty sure I was going to need that money. The guy wasn’t clubbing, he was working as a bouncer. It was his second job, he’d gotten himself in a bit of a jam financially when his wife ran off, cleaning the bank accounts and leaving him with two small girls. I liked the dude, he and I were never the closest of friends but knew each other.

I fronted him the money to get out from under and get a good lawyer so he didn’t get raped in the divorce. The wife’s lover got tired of her after four months and kicked her to the curb. She thought she could waltz back into his life like nothing happened and was stunned to see how wrong she was. When she found he wouldn’t take her back she got nasty, demanding the house, support, and custody of the children. Dave laughed at her and his lawyer ate her alive on the stand. She had to admit she’d abandoned the children and her lawyer tried to spin it as her leaving them in a stable environment while she and her lover got established.

Then his lawyer made her admit that the primary reason she tried to return to the relationship was being thrown out by her lover. Things went on for about forty minutes when the Judge stopped everyone.

“It’s clear to me that the children are best left with their father, in a stable home. Mrs. Meekins, you basically abandoned your children for another man. Tell me, if he still wanted you, would you have returned? Don’t answer that because I think we all know the truth. Mr. Meekins I believe the marriage is as you say, damaged beyond repair, and I won’t burden you with the cost of counseling. That being said Mrs. Meekins appears to have been a good wife up until last year so I’m awarding her maintenance for three years. Don’t smile too broadly, Mrs. Meekins, because the child support I’m ordering you to pay since you are not the primary care giver takes three quarters of it away. If you like you can make arrangements to have it deducted from your maintenance checck to make it easier on everyone. Mr. Meekins the divorce is granted. Mrs. Meekins you are a free woman. Try to make better choices in the future. Next case, baliff.”

Since he was a single parent he qualified for the Earned Income Credit on his taxes, and got over ten grand back from the IRS. He called me the day the deposit was made, telling me he had the money to pay me back. I knew it would take most of it to clear his debt, and offered to defer half until next year but he refused, saying he’d rather not have the debt hang over him.

I didn’t know it, but Ali saw the chunk of bills change hands and zoomed in on me. She thought for about two months I was a drug dealer and was surprised that I wasn’t. “Where does your money come from?”

I grinned. “I work for it. Strange concept I know, but you get used to it.”

She was a pure party girl, using her beauty and her ability of being a great sex partner to carry her along. We were doomed from the start. I resisted letting her move in with me for a good while until she told me she loved me and if that wasn’t enough then we needed to part ways. For six months it was glorious. Then cliche of cliches, I came home early. She wasn’t just in bed with another man she was in bed with two men and a woman. I never knew she swung that way.

Let’s just say the rant and the subsequent fight are still talked about in some circles. I didn’t have much of a filter back then and I just turned loose. One guy was on her banging away, his balls swinging. I must have timed it just right, catching him just as he reached bottom. His balls had no where to swing when I nailed him. The pain knocked him out and he collapsed with a grunt. Ali must have thought he’d come and giggled.

“Wow!,” she giggled, “talk about a strong finish!”

He just lay there. She finally figured something was wrong when she saw the other woman fly across the room and crash in to the wall. She slid down, out like a light. By now the other guy was cowering in the corner begging me not to kill him. I tried to kick him in the nuts a few times but he was well covered. I did manage to crack a bone in his arm, and the bruises were still there five weeks later.

Ali finally figured out what was going on and jumped off the bed. The last I saw of her was her naked ass as it bounced down the sidewalk. I dragged the other three out and piled them on the steps. The guy conscious begged for their clothes.

“I’ll be right back.” I gathered their clothes in a pile and took a good long piss on them. Then I threw them out the door. His nose wrinkled but people were starting to gather. The woman woke up with a huge knot on her head and the man helped her into her jeans and tee shirt. The nutted guy came around, moaning and crying. They managed to get his shirt and boxers on, putting him between them and supporting him as they limped down the sidewalk to a van.

I found out later they didn’t report the incident because they were all married to someone else and two were city employees. If word got out they would all face divorce and at least two of them would be out of a job.

The first thing I did was change the locks. Ali just knocked a window out, crawling in and gathering what stuff I hadn’t already thrown on the lawn. They had been lying there for three days. I drank a lot of beer those nights and when I had to go I’d water one pile or another.

Her sister said she threw up twice but she was too broke to replace them, so she gathered them into garbage bags and washed them at her mother’s house. I got a pretty sharp phone call and I didn’t help when I told her it must be inherited. “You’ve been married what, four times? And you lived with at least three different guys. It seems they all left you because you couldn’t keep your legs closed. I guess the apple doesn’t fall far the tree after all. You’re getting a little long in the tooth for this shit Marie. There’s nothing sadder an old whore.” She was screaming when I hung up.

...

With the history we had, I figured my appearance back into their lives would be met with a less than cordial reception. That being said, it went surprisingly well.

Ali came to the door, shading her eyes in the sun to see who had pulled into her driveway. Her hair was back in a messy ponytail, wearing an old tee shirt with holes and tight jeans. At least she hasn’t gone to fat I thought, as I stepped out of the car.

It had been thirteen years, and I had changed. My hair was a lot shorter and I had a full beard. I’d developed a gym addition when I helped a friend set one up and got a free membership for life. I wasn’t bodybuilder big, but I was well defined. I could tell she had no idea who I was. Her expression was neutral until Kinsey popped out of the passenger side. “Hi Mom!”

“Kinsey! Where have you been? And just who is this? What have I told you about getting into a car with strangers? Who the hell are you, mister?”

She had rushed out to the car and was pretty close when I spoke. “Hi Ali. Long time no see. Who I might be is the father of this cute little girl. The one I didn’t know about. Got anything you want to tell me?”

I expected a lot of things from our first meeting. I expected shouting, anger, maybe a threat or two. What I didn’t expect was for her to faint dead away. I saw her eyes roll back and was just barely able to catch her before she hit the ground. I looked down at her, noticing the lines in her face. I did the math and she was about thirty-three or maybe thirty-four, and it looked like time had not been kind to her.

Kinsey was dancing around not knowing what to do. I got her focused. “Kinsey! Open the door! Let’s get your Mom settled.”

She snatched open the door and I carried her into a surprisingly neat living room. Ali hadn’t been much of a housekeeper in the brief time we had been together.

“Go wet a washcloth with cold water, Kinsey. Rub her forehead gently.” She rushed off and I heard water running. I stepped back when she returned. “Good girl. Leave it on her head and rub her arms.”

It took about a minute and a half before she started stirring. She opened her eyes and looked into her daughter’s face. “What happened? I remember coming out to see who was here and...” She suddenly noticed me standing behind Kinsey.

“YOU, YOU ... Get out of this house! Do it now or I’m calling the cops. Stay away from us!”

I sighed. I didn’t expect it to go well. I just didn’t think she hated me that much. “All right. I’m going to get in my car and pull it out of your driveway and park on the side of the road. That’s public property. Then I’m going to sit and wait for you to come out and talk to me. If you make me wait too long I’ll leave. Then I’ll come back with lawyers and cops. We can do it the civil way or the hard way, the choice is yours. I would urge you to make it as easy as you can on the child. Your choice.”

It took her forty minutes. I had given up and was letting out the clutch when Kinsey came running out waving frantically. “Wait! Please, she’s coming out. You guys aren’t going to scream at each other are you?”

I grinned. “Relax, kid. I haven’t screamed since I was nine and rarely even raise my voice now. I’m not the one you need to tell to keep a civil tongue.”

Kinsey sighed. “Mom is probably going to yell. I’ll ask her to keep it down though. The neighbors are already wondering why a hotrod is parked in front of our house.”

I’d seen the curtians ruffle and a few came out on the porch. One old guy sat down in a rocker and stared. He must be easily amused. Ali came out slowly looking like she was going to a gallows, not a conversation. “What do you want?”

She was just as direct and just as dumb as I remembered. “I’m looking for the meaning of life, some hot tips on good stocks, and the winning numbers for tonight’s lottery. What do you think I want? I want to know if she’s mine.”

“She’s not. You can go away now.”

The discussion wasn’t loud, but it was pretty heated.

“Surely you remember a little about me. You know I’m not going away. I’ve bit down now. I’m just like a big cooter, I won’t let go until it thunders or you cut my head off.” I knew she wouldn’t like that. Cooters (snapping turtles) get pretty big around here. I once saw one that weighed over 75 pounds and It was nowhere near the state record. Ali was scared to death of them when we were together and I was guessing she still was. What I’d said was folklore about cooters.

“Leave now or I’m going to call someone who can make you leave.”

“Who you gonna call? Ghost Busters? The Mod Squad? Andy and Barney? Call the cops and then it will be a matter of public record. Calm down, Ali. I don’t have to associate with you. If she is mine we can arrange for her to go to her grandmothers’ house when I pick her up. I’ll need a sample before I leave, Ali. Make it hard and get lawyers involved and it could get ugly. Let’s try to be adult for the sake of the child.”

Kinsey was sitting on the porch steps, knees drawn up to her chin, trying her best to listen. She looked scared to death. Ali let out something that sounded like “AArghh!” and stomped back to the porch, talking on her phone. I was just about to leave again when six motorcycles rolled up. They looked like a bunch of Hell’s Angels rejects, flying colors that said Evil Revengers. Really? What evil were they seeking vengence for?

I got out again and stood by the door as one of the biggest stomped towards me. I think it bothered him I was grinning. “I’ve never met an Evil Revenger before. What evil exactly are you revenging? The high cost of living? The deplorable state of health care in America? Those pesky jaywalkers that refuse to obey crossing signs? My God, the list is endless! I bet you’re a pretty busy bunch.”

Kinsey was listening and at first she seemed alarmed. The more I talked the more relaxed she got and at one point she giggled. His head snapped around and instead of dropping her eyes she grinned. “Careful there, T Rex, that’s probably my father and I don’t think you’ve impressed him. The T in T Rex stands for Theodore, Daddy, isn’t that adorable?”

If there was ever a doubt she was my daughter it was just removed. “Well, Teddy, it’s been nice talking to you but we’re trying to work out some unresolved family issues. Run along now.”

Ali was starting to look uncomfortable. Memories she tried hard to surpress could be the cause. “T, I think maybe it was a mistake to call you. Let me figure this out and I’ll get back to you. Thanks for the support, honey.”

Mr. T was not looking happy. I was pretty sure his lizard brain was trying to work out how badly he had been disrespected and minimized. I could tell by the widening of his eyes he had finally figured out he was looking like a fool. “Fuck that! This asshole needs a lesson about bothering my bitch.”

I looked at Ali and she went white when he said ‘his bitch’, so I’m thinking this was the first time she was aware of her status. Then she looked at me and grinned. “Well, I did warn him.”

He turned to me, opening his mouth to spout more shit but I changed his mind by putting my fist in it. It knocked him backwards but I moved with him, putting my left into his gut. He was a big guy but surprisingly soft. I think I might have hit his backbone. He went down with an explosive ‘Whuff!’ and lay there.

I grinned, looking at his posse. They were standing with their mouths open, something I was sure was their natural expression. “Well girls, it looks like the big alhpa male is down. You bitches got a choice. You can try running with the big dogs, or lay on the porch and whimper. What’s it going to be?”