Chapter 1

JESSICA – The Long Sad Goodbye

As I drove down the highway I mused over my dilemma – I was literally all dressed up with no place to go. I had been ready for my date with my fiancé to go out for dinner and maybe some dancing. He was late but that was not unusual - he did that all the time.

Finally, after an hour of waiting, I called him. The cell phone rang a couple of times and I thought he wasn’t going to answer. Then I could hear his voice faintly over the line; I could hear loud music in the background and what sounded like many people talking, laughing, and shouting.

“Hello, hello! Is anyone there?” Gerald was asking.

“Gerry! It’s me, Jesse.”

“Wait a minute.”

There was a sudden lowering of the background noise as I heard a door closing.

“Jesse, you still there?”

“Yeah, Gerry. I’ve been waiting for an hour!”

“Jesse, babe, I’m sorry. Something came up at the last minute – this party, see? I couldn’t get out of it. Hey, babe! I’ll make it up to you. I’ll come over tomorrow and you can fix me dinner, right? See you later then. Bye babe.”

As he was saying goodbye, I could hear a voice in the background, “Hey, lover, there you... “ as the call ended.

I knew he was with another woman. The hints were all there and I should have picked up on them better. One of my friends told me she saw Gerry in a bar dancing with a blond. I was defensive, “Oh, you must be mistaken! I know Jerry was visiting his mom that night.”

Another time he smelled strongly of a perfume I didn’t use. “Jesse, that was my sister. She gave me a big hug right after she put some on, I’d given her form a bottle for her birthday.

But worse than everything was that this was the third time in the last two weeks that Gerry hadn’t show up for a date. Did I mean so little to him as that? I wanted his love so much! I was tired of being lonely ... I was just tired – of everything.

The traffic was light. I’d expected that; this was a Wednesday evening in mid-January after the holiday season rush for the slopes. Not that I really cared. I had no interest for the life I was leaving – looking back in the rear-view mirror I saw no memories to cherish. The winter wonderland of the snow flurries flirting with the tall pines flashing implacably by the windows impressed no image of beauty as a new memory to be pulled gently from my mind and shared as a treasured moment with a loved one. There were no loved ones to share with.

As I went through the tunnel, heading for Dillon, I grimaced distastefully as I realized that Gerry was never going to change. He would keep up his womanizing even after we got married! I hardened my heart to complete what I had set out to do. I was headed for a roadside park just west of Dillon that I knew would be deserted. I didn’t want to go to a place where I wouldn’t be found for months – that would be too hard on my Aunt and Uncle.