Chapter 7: Am I Supposed To Make Dragons Cry?

Luckily, Pepin was already inside the royal chambers, busy dusting around with a feathery implement.

“What happened?” he asked and hurried to them.

“Conrad’s hurt. Bring the court’s physician,” Kai said in a steady voice. It was all a fantasy or a dream or a BL show, and probably he would get pulled to the real world anytime soon, but that didn’t mean that he would take the situation lightly.

“Right away,” Pepin replied without asking for additional details.

Kai carried Conrad to the bed and helped him lie down. “Are you all right? Any nausea? Dizziness? Is your whole life flashing before your eyes?”

Conrad tried to laugh, but then he winced in pain. “Why are you so different?” he asked.

“I’m not. That’s who I really am,” Kai retorted.

“Then I’ve been told a lot of lies,” Conrad whispered, and his eyelids grew heavy.

“Hey, hey, don’t you dare feint on me. I have no idea what to do if you suddenly died.”

Conrad’s eyes snapped open. “Why would you care?” he asked, looking pretty suspicious of Kai’s reasons to say such things.

“How could I not? You’re in my care or something.”

“Why would you feel responsible?” Conrad insisted. “I am but a tool for you to use.”

Oh, please, don’t say it.

Conrad continued. “Your concubine, your slave to use as you wish.”

Kai closed his eyes, squeezed them hard, and then released a drawn heavy sigh. “It’s only because you insist,” he said and pointed a finger at Conrad.

“Don’t worry, Your Majesty. I know you would quickly discard me if I failed to have my uses.” His eyelids were closing again.

Kai snapped his fingers in front of him. “You didn’t lose that much blood, right? Why do you keep falling asleep?”

“It ... hurts,” Conrad hissed. “I’m so tired.”

“No,” Kai said in a determined voice. “No, you’re not allowed to sleep. I have no idea why you shouldn’t, but that’s how they say in those – I mean, I order you to stay awake, dammit!”

The doors opened, and Pepin, followed by a man with long grey hair, rushed in.

“Your Majesty,” the physician said and took a long and unnecessary bow.

“Yes, yes, I know. Just come here and fix him.”

The physician didn’t have to be told twice. He stepped closer to the patient and began examining him. Kai moved out of the way, not wanting to interfere with the medical act, whatever it entailed in this world.

Pepin touched his arm. “Who did this to Conrad?”

“A suspicious hooded figure,” Kai said promptly.

“Are you joking?”

“I’m serious,” Kai protested. “I think it was someone sent to assassinate me.”

“Assassinate? And you didn’t call the guards?” Pepin raised his voice.

Kai shushed him. “There’s a patient in the room, what the hell? And he was gone, like in an instant. Plus, I had to take Conrad to safety.”

Pepin appeared surprised. “You let the assassin get away,” he said slowly like he was just starting to realize something.

“Well, if it means so much to you, go and tell the guards to search the castle for suspicious hooded figures. Actually, not so hooded, since Conrad grabbed his robe. He was dressed all in black if that helps.”

“The robe, where is it?” Pepin asked impatiently.

“In the hallway, where the attack took place.”

“Let’s go get it, and you can inform the guards on our way to search for this assassin.”

“It sounds like a waste of time, but as you wish,” Kai said, a tiny bit vexed. “Hey, who’s ordering who around here, um?”

Pepin threw him a pointed look. “With all due respect, Your Majesty, you appear to forget how important you are for the kingdom of Ifigia.”

It hadn’t occurred to Kai until now that he hadn’t even known the name of the place where he had been transported by, apparently, a whim of fate. “Again, Pepin, I’m not letting this guy,” he pointed at Conrad, “die on my watch.”

“Why?” Pepin asked and pouted like a petulant child. “Are you in love with him?”

Kai groaned. “Stop being jealous. I just don’t like it, you know, people dying and stuff.”

“So you’re not in love with him,” Pepin concluded for himself.

“He’s a dude,” Kai said. “Why would I be in love with him?”

Pepin exhaled, more relaxed now. “Should we see about that robe, Your Majesty?”

“All right, let’s go, if it means so much to you. Will Conrad be safe, only with the physician here?”

“Why wouldn’t he?” Pepin asked.

“Well, there’s an assassin on the loose,” Kai pointed out. Maybe he was a scatterbrain, but Pepin didn’t seem much different. The servant seemed to have already forgotten about calling the guards and ordering a full-scale manhunt.

“Yes, the assassin,” Pepin said, and his alertness returned in full force. “After you, Your Majesty. And are you sure that you’re not doing this because you love Conrad?”

“Oh, shut up already, you annoying jealous...” Kai hesitated, not knowing what to say so that it didn’t sound too insulting to those delicate and quick to pass judgment ears.

“I am not jealous,” Pepin said airily. “Just concerned.”

“Yeah, concerned someone might take your place. Don’t worry, Conrad seems like the kind of guy who would be completely useless with a feather duster.” Kai grabbed Pepin’s hand. The servant looked at him with loving eyes. He was so hot and cold, it wasn’t even funny. “Now let’s grab the robe and put the guards on high alert, yes?”

“Yes,” Pepin said quietly and let himself dragged away.

The robe was still on the floor, which meant that the assassin hadn’t thought of coming back to wipe his traces. Pepin took the garment and began studying it intently. “As I suspected. The house of Uxilan.” He pointed at a small dark red crest that would have been easy to miss on that black fabric.

“Who are they?”

“You destroyed them,” Pepin said. “They were dealing in black magic and tried to keep you from marching through their territory.”

Kai didn’t dare to ask more about that. “Apparently, I didn’t do that good of job, if some of them are still alive and trying to stab me with pointy blades.”

“Pointy? Oh, no,” Pepin gasped.

“What? What is it?”

“Let’s hurry back to Conrad,” Pepin said quickly. He was the one to grab Kai’s hand.

“Now who’s in love with the guy?” Kai tried to joke.

“It is possible that he was poisoned,” came the hasty reply.

“Poisoned? Oh, shit, that’s bad.”

They started running.

The physician must have reached the same conclusion if his drawn face and worried eyes were any indications.

“How bad is it?” Kai asked directly.

Conrad had his eyes closed, and his face had a sickly pallor. He was sweating profusely and looked gone to the world.

“You did well to freeze the blood, Your Majesty,” the physician replied. “But it is poison, and not even ice magic will prevent it from spreading.”

“Is there an antidote?”

“Yes, there is one, but not easy to get. Leaves of angelica, hyssop root extract, and --” the physician hesitated.

“And?” Kai asked, tapping his foot.

“The tear of a dragon,” the old man finally answered.

“Are you kidding me? I mean, is this a joke?”

“No, Sire.”

“How am I supposed to make a dragon cry? Should I tickle him? Have him watch sappy movies?”

“I do not know, Sire,” the physician said apologetically.

“All right,” Kai said and began to pace the room. “I was heading over to that dragon cave anyway. I’ll figure out a way. Pepin, get my horse ready, and whatever I need to take with me to fight dragons.”

“Just killing a dragon won’t make him cry,” the physician pointed out. “They are creatures made of fire and anger.”

“Well, then I won’t kill him. I’ll find a way,” Kai said. “The rest of the ingredients, do you have them?”

“Yes, of course,” the old man replied. “But, Sire, it is a perilous quest. Of what I heard, to touch a dragon’s heart, one needs to reach it. Cold steel and magic won’t work. And the few who ever succeeded if we were to believe the tales, went against dragons alone.”

“Fine by me,” Kai said. “I’m overpowered anyway, and I need to put my skills to the test. So I’ll go face this dragon by myself.”

“Don’t you dare,” Pepin shouted, ignoring that they had an audience.

Kai frowned. “Don’t lecture me, Pepin. I’m going, and that’s final.”

“Sire, if you allowed me a piece of advice,” the physician intervened, “allowing this man who until yesterday used to be your enemy, to perish, wouldn’t be seen as an act of malevolence. You could always get another concubine.”

“Talk to the hand,” Kai said and put one palm up in front of the physician.

That made the old man confused enough to stop making his case against Conrad.

“And make sure to keep him alive until I get back, or there will be consequences.”

What consequences those would be, he had no idea, but, at the moment, putting the fear of Prince Sebastian into those old bones looked like the right course of action.

The physician went back by the patient’s side right away. “Of course, Your Majesty,” he said grimly.

Kai felt a little bad about lying to the old man, but dire times called for dire measures. “Pepin, get guards to the door. They should be here at all times, in case someone tries something shady.”

“Yes, Your Majesty,” Pepin replied as a servant should. “But you’re not going alone to the dragon’s cave. I’m coming.”

“Why? I don’t need a sandwich while I’m sneaking into that beast’s lair.” Actually, he might get hungry, but whatever, he’d just grab some supplies.

Pepin seemed calm and composed. “You need me.”

Of course, he had no idea about the way to the dragon cave. “Why?” he chose to play his hand. “Do you happen to know how to get there?”

“Of course I do,” Pepin replied, now full of indignation of being suspected of such lack of knowledge.

“Then you’re coming,” Kai said like it was the most natural thing in the world to change his mind at the drop of a dime.

“I’ll make all the arrangements,” Pepin informed him. “We’ll be riding west before nightfall.”

“Yeah, let’s hurry. And you know what? Grab some sandwiches for the road.”

“What are those, sandwiches?”

“You take a slice of bread --” Kai began, “oh, shoot, never mind. Some food and water.”

“Of course. What kind of royal servant do you think I am, Your Majesty?” Pepin bristled, now taking offense over this underhanded attack at his skills.

With Pepin rushing through the door, Kai started looking around for things he might need in his quest. His eyes fell on Conrad. Even pale and worn by the poison trying to wring the life out of him, he was still handsome.

He took a step toward the bed, then another. He hovered and whispered, “I promise, you’ll get better.” He touched Conrad’s face with hesitant fingers, taking in the contour of his nose and lips.

The physician shifted in his place. “Your Majesty,” he cleared his throat, “you might need this.” He offered him an empty vial. “For the dragon’s tear.”

“Oh, right.” Kai shook his head. A warm and unfamiliar feeling deserted his heart as he pulled his eyes away from Conrad’s face. “Don’t worry. I’ll make him cry a river.”

The physician inspected him with clever eyes. “They keep gossiping about a change in our cold but just Prince Sebastian.”

Oh, no, Kai groaned internally, not this again.

“But it was foretold,” the old man added, “that love would do that to our protector.”

Love? Even this old dude thought he was in love with Conrad?

“What change? I have no idea what you’re talking about, man.” He used a harsher voice than usual to stop the physician from talking nonsense.