Chapter 30: Unexpected Guests

Kai barely noticed as they flew above the large fields of green and rolling hills. They were heading for Kelonia, and he had never been there, but he couldn’t bring himself to feel the slightest enthusiasm. His mind was a mess. Galien had said something about them being in danger, Pepin was kind of pregnant or something, and on top of everything, Milo and Tani were there, with him, trapped in a fantasy world, at least one of them scared shitless.

Somehow, that didn’t feel like such a joyride anymore.

“Galien,” he began as soon as Adhe left them at the entrance of a magnificent estate that appeared to stretch as far as eyes could see. “Do you think those people who had been gathered to fight the dark magic jerks will know to go back on their own?”

Galien nodded. “Sebastian is in charge now. He knows what to do. But is this the first thing you’re worried about?”

Kai looked down. Milo and Tani were following them inside, through the large wrought iron gates, his best friend mumbling under his breath and trying to convince himself that he was still dreaming, his sister murmuring short exclamations of admiration at the incredible beauty around them.

“They marched to war because they wanted to follow me. I suppose I’m responsible. And it feels easier than to think about those other things.”

“Do you mean, Pepin having your heir?”

Kai snickered, although that was totally inappropriate given the severity of the situation. “Heir, right. I mean, it’s not like that baby will be royalty. Obviously, because I’m not. I’m sure he’ll grow up thinking that his dad is a total deadbeat.” Hmm, suddenly, that didn’t sound so funny anymore. “Oh, no, I’m going to be a dad,” he said and slapped his cheeks. “I totally need to pull my act together. I mean, I need to find work and start saving. Do you know how expensive college is? I guess he could take a student loan, but those can be hard to pay back--”

“Easy,” Galien stopped his descent into madness. “I don’t really understand what you’re talking about, but there are things we need to focus on right now, such as saving our lovers from that woman’s wrath. And you.” He threw a quick look back. “As well as Sebastian’s chosen and your sister.”

“Sebastian’s chosen? Do you mean Milo?” That seemed like such a strange thought. But seeing how Milo had been just on the point of confessing at the beginning of all this body swap mess, maybe it wasn’t so hard to imagine that. Sebastian must have seduced Milo so hard. The thought was funny, but again, he needed to stop laughing. At this point, he feared that it was more like a nervous reaction.

“Milo,” Galien repeated after him. He said the name as he wanted to make sense of it and the person behind it. “He is very handsome,” he added after looking over his shoulder again. “He appears to have much difficulty in understanding what is happening, unlike you. You truly had us all fooled. Is he dim-witted, the poor thing?”

Kai bit his lips. “No, actually he has much better grades than me. It’s just that he doesn’t believe that things like body swapping and traveling to other worlds are possible. Unlike me,” he added quickly.

“Oh,” Galien replied, somewhat baffled by that explanation. “Doesn’t your world have magic?”

“Nope. Actually, if you started claiming that you could go to some fantasy worlds for real, you would be sent to the loony bin.”

“Loony bin,” Galien repeated slowly. “What kind of bin is that?”

“You know, the place where they send people thought to be crazy,” Kai explained.

“Are you crazy? In your world? Do you come from a loony bin?”

The path taking them to the palace was quite long. It appeared that Galien wasn’t troubled about taking the stroll, but Kai didn’t feel very apt to walk so much after all that body-swapping back thing. “I’ll explain it later,” he decided. “It’s a lot to take in, trust me.”

“Astonishing,” Galien agreed. “Now allow me to play the obliging host.”

An elderly butler followed by a squad of four maids marched toward them in a hurry. “Master Galien, Your Grace!” The man stopped abruptly and took a bow. The maids followed his example.

“Mort, I know I have guests with me, but they’re not the usual kind, so let’s stop pretending.”

The butler straightened up, and his stern face split into a large smile. He had to be the perfect professional because he turned all his attention to Galien after a brief look at the unexpected guests. “Master, where have you been for so long?” He hurried to Galien and began feeling his arms as if to check if he was whole. “And we heard about the war against Uxilan! What happened?”

The maids hurried toward them, and Kai found himself grabbed by a sturdy-looking girl with rosy cheeks. “I know just the perfect room for you,” she said, clearly convinced of what she had to do.

Milo was taken in hand by another maid, while Tani had the privilege of having two maids fussing over her.

“I will let you get accustomed to your rooms for a bit,” Galien said, “and get some rest, but we will have dinner soon. Then we’ll talk about we’ll do next.”

Kai totally agreed with that plan. He was wasted and hungry, and he bet that Tani and Milo had to feel the same after all the excitement.

He couldn’t say he was surprised to hear a knock on the door and then have Tani burst through it without waiting for a reply. Her pigtails were gone, and, instead, her hair had been braided into a fancy arrangement. She wore a beautiful blue dress worthy of a little princess, with tiny pearls woven into the fabric and so long that it swept the floor. The oversized sleeves were bunched around the shoulders but then glued to her forearms. On top of everything, she had bracelets and rings on both hands that looked incredibly expensive.

“You must be having the time of your life,” he commented but smiled at seeing his sister so happy in her outfit.

“The maids here are completely nuts,” Tani said and sat on his bed, “I mean, in a good way.”

“Have you seen Milo?” Kai asked. His sister was taking things in stride, and if there were one thing they had in common as siblings, that was their firm belief in all the fantastic things in anime series and mangas. Of course, before all of this, it was just an imaginary belief. Now they had been both proven right. Milo, however, was a totally different type of person.

“No, but I heard the maids saying that Galien and his butler took care of him personally to help him rest.”

“If that old man was in the room with them, then I have nothing to worry about,” Kai said while rubbing one ear. “Seeing how Galien is--” He stopped in time. His sister didn’t have to know what a flirt the guy was, and anyway, Galien had boundaries when he cared. This time, he cared.

“Who is this Galien dude?” Tani looked around. “I mean, I got it that he’s Sebastian’s cousin, but man, the size of this palace, it’s just freaking amazing!”

Kai waved with importance. “Sebastian’s place is even bigger than this. And I ruled there like for two weeks. Minstrels came and sang songs about me,” he added. Well, he wouldn’t say what exactly they sang about, but he wanted to impress Tani nonetheless.

“Cool,” Tani whispered. “You’ll have to talk to Milo and explain everything, though, because he seriously thinks that he got naughty with you all this time.”

“Well, that’s complicated.” Kai pushed himself up and threw his sister a pointed look. “How naughty are we talking about?”

“Hello, you can’t ask me that, I’m thirteen--”

“Almost fourteen, and I saw your secret BL stash.”

Tani sighed. “Well, things got pretty heavy. Milo’s seriously in love.”

Kai groaned and plopped down on the bed. He threw one hand over his eyes, and then he noticed the tattoo. Caught as he had been in everything, he hadn’t paid any attention to his own body, which he was supposed to have been missing all this time. He hadn’t, but his body didn’t need to know that.

“What the hell...” He pulled his sleeve up. “I got a tattoo?!” He stared at Tani in disbelief.

“Sebastian wanted to be badass because he saw how completely useless you could be.”

“Damn.” Kai pushed his hand farther so that he could see the ink properly. “I mean, I guess it looks kind of badass. What other crazy things he did while in my body?”

Tani threw him a sided look. “Can you still smell properly?”

Kai touched his nose right away. There was something about it slightly different. Like it wasn’t so straight anymore. “What the hell did he do?”

“Got into fights, stuff like that,” Tani replied with a shrug.

“Fights? With whom?”

“One guy called Chet and some other dudes.”

“Oh, I’m so dead. It’s official, I’m never going home. I’ll stay here, hidden in Galien’s palace. I bet he can afford a freeloader.”

Tani snickered. “You have nothing to worry about. Sebastian totally beat the crap out of Chet and those dudes. Seriously, they were crying for their mommas when he was done with them.”

Kai straightened up again and stared at Tani with squinted suspicious eyes. “For real? But how? He was in my body, and I can’t fight for shit.”

Tani shrugged again. “Dunno. But once he started working out and watching karate videos or something on the Internet, he got good. Like really fast. He smacked Chet with a pole right in the face. You should have seen that,” his sister added and laughed. “For real, Kai, you don’t have to worry about those bullies anymore. I think they’ll piss themselves if you ever do as little as breathe in their direction.”

“Hmm.” That wasn’t that bad. Kai felt his forearms a little, and they definitely felt more toned.

“By the way, did you do something weird to Sebastian’s body while you were in it?”

Tani’s question interrupted his exploration. “I fell off a horse once, but I didn’t break his butt or anything,” he said defensively.

“How did you deal with his royal concubines?”

“There’s only one, and I did nothing,” Kai continued to defend himself.

“Ah, that big guy with unruly hair?” Tani asked.

“By the way, how come you know so much?” Kai asked, completely unnerved by his sister’s knowledge of Sebastian’s affairs. “Did you know he wasn’t me, all this time?”

“No, because I just thought you were being totally weird.” Tani hid half her face to laugh. “You should have seen him, flushing the toilet and shouting crazy words. He was so in awe of everything. And I got to see who he was for real only today, when he beat up Chet and his stupid friends. I mean, I knew he wasn’t you not only because you don’t know Kung Fu, but also because he made some awesome things like having blue flames all around him and stuff like that.”

“I bet you wished he were your brother for real,” Kai said, pretty miffed by Tani’s recounting of Sebastian’s adventures.

“No, silly,” Tani replied. “I know you’re a weirdo, but you’re my brother. Although I like Sebastian. C’mon, it’s not like anyone could keep from liking him. He has crazy magic and he looks so cool.”

“And I was about to thank you for still caring for me as your brother. By the way, people around here are not so crazy about Sebastian, and he’s considered pretty much a cold bastard,” Kai cared to explain.

Tani pursed her lips in thought. “That’s weird, because he seems like a good guy.”

Kai didn’t know if he could agree, but Sebastian had been protecting the realm for a long time, and people of Ifigia could do a better job at being grateful. “Well, he’s back now. And for some weird reasons, he took Pepin with him and cut us off.”

Tani smiled and nudged him playfully. “Pepin, huh? How that happened?”