Ten years ago:

Dr. Rox’xannandra Brown, at the ripe old age of sixteen, graduated Summa Cum Laude with a doctorate in genetics and medicine. Seen as too young (and way too wacked), her residency was delayed, thus she was pushed aside to the university research department until she acquired more experience and became less wacked. Her name didn’t help her appearance of wackiness. Her mother, Judith Brown, was still high on crack, morphine, and a certain household cleaner, a full day after her daughter’s birth; when it came time for her to fill out the birth certificate she blurbed out an almost incomprehensible name. The nurse on duty at the time had heard worse and duly entered it the child’s name on the birth certificate.

No father was ever recorded or acknowledged.

With grants from WAR (Women are Right), the Illinois charter of “Un-Repressed Women”, AMAS (All Men are Scum), the NAACP (Splinter branch, the main branch was busy elsewhere at the time), and the all so innocuous — Only Women have the Right to Rule — Dr. Brown worked night and day with the aid of like-minded ‘True Women’ to create an RNA Virus that would lead to women’s rightful place in society and the world.

After five years of research and ‘forceable insight’ from the research of the unaware, useless, and incompetent male professors in the university that she and her assistants spent those long hours at, Dr. Brown created an RNA virus, which she believed would ensure Woman’s supremacy for all time.

She thoroughly tested the virus on worthy candidates, such as her Alma Mater’s Women’s Studies majors and the “Whips & Chains” lesbian biker club a mile away from her off campus lab, not that those worthy women received a say in the matter after being gassed and kidnapped.

The biker Gang ‘ladies’, along with the nineteen-year old women studies students, protested being experimented on ‘for the good of all women’. Not that Dr. Brown believed their humorous jokes in the guise of complaints. Dr. Brown could not conceive of any real woman not wanting her goal to succeed.

Testing was a complete success. Of the two hundred and ninety three volunteers (Dr. Brown liked prime numbers), sadly 19.5 died, – the one in the coma only counted as half dead. More in line with expectations were the 91 of the female volunteers that developed unusual abilities, or Super Powers; the rest of the test group seemed unaffected beyond being peeved at the loss of freedom during the test phase. What was even ‘more perfect’ was that ‘most of‘ the bikers who developed unusual abilities professed to quit “Whips & Chains” to lead a more honest life on their release.

After the successful results of her testing, she contracted the manufacture of the Virus out to her favored assistant’s aunt’s shampoo factory. Dr. Brown waited the six weeks to receive the tank full of the aqueous solution that would cement women’s place at the top of the world’s hierocracy.

After achieving results on the female volunteers that made her happy, she and her likeminded assistants drugged, kidnapped and doused the Gay bar occupants two doors down the street. Gay men being the worst sort of men, only believing in male superiority (in her wacked opinion), by excluding women from their lives altogether.

Of the fifty-nine male subjects that were subjected to the virus, seven died and were thrown in the dumpster, – which eventually led to Dr. Brown’s capture. Eighteen test subjects developed abilities, i.e. Super Powers. Those men were released en masse, after Dr. Brown informed the previous batch of Glorious Super Women where the despicable men could be found and what the intent of their gathering was.

The newly released, experimented upon men, turned rabid and aggressive after obtaining Super Powers. They were ‘very enraged’ at being confined together in a small locked room with no facilities while being experimented on. The battle between them and the ‘prereleased’ former ‘willing’ subjects caused a great deal of damage to a nearby preschool. Luckily, it was after midnight, so the only ones in the school who got hurt were the teddy bears and crayons. –the Legos and Tonka trucks went unharmed, for they are indestructible.

Since the Super Women had one full month to get used to their ‘Glorious Abilities’ that only women should possess (in Dr. Brown’s continued wacked out opinion), along with their greater numbers, they ‘easily’ subdued most of the ‘rabid’ men with their ‘Evil Powers’. The few who did escape, fled the scene before the cops arrived with their sirens ablaze. During the fight, Dr. Brown’s cronies returned the leftover, useless men to the bar from where they were originally acquired, with the aid of the school bus that they borrowed from the Preschool, which was also destroyed in the process.

The Villainous, Evil, Super Powered men were captured and arrested by the police, proving once again that all men were criminals (to the Whacked Dr. Brown), while the Superior Women at the scene completely blamed the angry men for the confrontation.

The day after the final test of women versus men, the ‘Shampoo’ shipment arrived with three tank trucks whose contents were immediately transferred into a cooled holding tank.

Over the next two days, Dr. Brown’s assistants started spraying the RNA virus at an altitude of one thousand feet. They used three unmanned crop sprayers, – repurposed remote quadcopters, each with a payload of fifty pounds, or six gallons of virus, and a total flight time of fifty minutes. The airborne virus slowly infected the southwestern part of Chicago.