Chapter 13: The Emerald Empire Auction House

Eveline decided that a way to get out of her naked dilemma was to get a job. She wouldn’t say it to Strickland directly, but she knew that to go to any job interview, she’d most certainly would have to get dressed. That meant finally buying some clothes. Certainly Coach Strickland couldn’t object to her student wanting to demonstrate initiative and earn some money and get some work experience. Certainly she’d finally have to relent on not allowing Eveline to get dressed.

Eveline brought up the subject at breakfast. She wasn’t sure what to expect. Perhaps Coach Strickland wouldn’t let her get a job after-all because it would interfere with her studies and chores around the house. However, Eveline’s mentor was surprisingly supportive.

“Yes, young lady, I suppose you’re right. A job, at least on the weekends, wouldn’t be a bad idea. I’ll make a few calls and see what I can come up with.”

“Come up with? I kinda thought ... I’d just go downtown, and ... you know ... check out the stores...”

“Wrong. Places are shutting down. E-commerce is killing everything. The stores aren’t hiring anymore and the mall’s already gone. And no, I will not have you working in food service. You’ll knock yourself out for nothing and the pay is shit. Not worth your time.”

“But...”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ll make some calls and come up with something better for you.”

Eveline didn’t say anything more because she dared not argue with her coach, but she wondered what “something better” could possible be. She now was worried, and very much regretted having brought up the topic.

Coach Strickland didn’t say anything more about Eveline getting a job for the rest of the week. Eveline didn’t say anything more either, because her hostess had eliminated the two most likely types of work an inexperienced high school student could get: a job at a store and a job at a restaurant. In a way the student was relieved that Coach Strickland had flatly told her she would not be allowed to have a food service job, because, really, food service jobs are always pretty awful.

That Friday afternoon, school let out early. Coach Strickland was unusually well-dressed for a Friday and had told Eveline not to make any plans for the afternoon. Obviously something was going on, but, by then, the student knew that her mentor would tell her whatever she needed to know whenever she felt like it, and no sooner.

After lunch, Coach Strickland drove the younger woman past a bunch of estates to an old mansion, which was located in a picturesque spot between to the state’s wealthiest country club and a members-only lake resort. There were several expensive-looking vintage cars parked close to the front door. The building had security cameras on the walls and in the parking lot to cover the front entrance. The only other detail to indicate the location was a business was a modest sign above the door:

The Emerald Empire Fine Art & Antiques

Coach Strickland noted the bewildered expression on her student’s face:

“I didn’t forget about you wanting to get a job, but I wanted to make sure you have the best one possible considering your circumstances. I’m telling you, this’ll be a really nice gig if you can get it. It pays well, it’s about as easy a job as you can possibly have and, from what I understand, they even offer health and dental insurance. I went through some trouble to set up this interview and talked you up over the phone, so you’d better be grateful and do what you can to make a good impression.”

“But ... Coach Strickland ... I ... I mean ... what about clothes for the interview?”

“Don’t need ‘em. You’ll see once we get inside.”

Eveline took a deep breath and tried to hide her exasperation.

No clothes needed for a job interview? What the hell... ?

As soon as they entered the building, a receptionist escorted Coach Strickland and Eveline to a large, very expensively decorated study. The receptionist did not seem surprised in the least that a naked young woman had just entered the building. The only reaction she had was to comment:

“Wow. Looks like someone’s eager to get started. Mr. Silman and Ms. Lombardi will see you now.”

Two well-dressed company officials, a man in his 40’s and a woman who looked about 30, were waiting to receive the job applicant. They introduced themselves as Fred Silman and Nancy Lombardi. Fred was dressed in a suit and Nancy was wearing an expensive lavender business outfit. Like the receptionist, they seemed not at all surprised that their aspirant was naked. Silman reached forward to shake Eveline’s hand, while Nancy looked at her through her eyeglasses, studying her with a detached, professional demeanor.

Even before the interview began, Eveline could tell that Fred Silman had a positive impression of her. Nancy, who had been a professional model herself just a few years before, maintained a neutral expression.

“It’s good to see someone come in here with the right attitude. We don’t get that often enough. OK, Eveline, have a seat and we’ll get started.”

Eveline sat down in an elegant chair. The cool cloth of the seat felt very strange on her bare bottom and reminded her that she was naked in a room with three well-dressed people. She might have panicked, but Coach Strickland was watching. Eveline’s fear of displeasing her mentor forced her to focus on the task of the moment, performing well in the job interview.

Fred spoke as soon as the applicant was seated:

“Now, to get started, a bit of background. You know that the Emerald Empire is the premier antique and fine art auction house in the region. Right now the “region” consists of nine states and an outlet in Toronto, but we’re planning on changing that in a big way. We have entered into partnership with the Golden Horde Antique Channel on cable and we’re gonna expand. Now, before I continue, let me ask you something, young lady. What is an antique? Can you give me a definition?”

“It’s something that’s old, Sir. Like ... it’s an old collectable thing, ‘cause of its age, and ‘cause it’s rare. And ... also ‘cause it’s pretty ... and people like it ... and ‘cause they don’t make ‘em anymore.”

“Not bad. You got the textbook definition of an antique, more or less. Anyhow, that’s what people want to believe. The truth is that antiques are totally worthless. You can’t do anything with an antique, other than put it on a shelf and look at it. Same goes for art. Art is totally worthless. So, the mission of our company is to convert worthless objects into cash. So tell me this, Eveline, how does a salesman convert a worthless object into cash?”

Eveline was shocked at the man’s cynical view of his own business, but she thought for a second and forced herself to answer:

“I ‘spose, Sir ... what you gotta do is convince your buyers what they’re getting is worth a bunch of money, even though it isn’t.”

“Exactly. It’s all about presentation. You catch the buyers’ attention, give them a good pitch, and walk off with their money. As I said, it’s all about presentation. Especially at auctions. And that’s where our demonstrators come in.”

“Yes, Sir.” Eveline responded, without really understanding what he was talking about, or what corporate sales pitches had to do with her sitting naked in a fancy room.

“We’ve come up with all kinds of psychological tricks to try to convince people to pay more. The most common one is, of course, trying to convince buyers that there is scarcity and that, if they don’t act fast, they’ll miss out. That’s the oldest trick in the book, used by everyone. And because it’s used by everyone, there’s no advantage.”

Fred glanced at his co-worker and continued:

“So, we at Emerald Empire wanted to come up with something different. And last year I saw something different when I went to an art auction boutique in Europe. It was a small operation in a small town outside Vienna, but their sales and profits were through the roof. They weren’t doing any of that psychology crap we do in the US on their buyers, but they were selling like crazy. And the reason was, they were using naked employees to present their stuff during auctions. A simple strategy, and brilliant. The naked employees drew people into the auction house. That’s half the fight right there, just getting buyers through the door. The other half was that having naked employees “presenting” the items distracted the buyers and made them not pay attention to how much they were bidding. Do you follow me so far?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“So, I came back to the US with this idea, presented it to management, and they let me run with it. It’s been hugely successful. I’d say at auction, on average, Emerald Empire is selling merchandise at about 23% more than we would have sold comparable items last year. That 23% is pure profit. Now we did have a rough start. As you can imagine, most of the presenters we had working with us at the time were pretty upset when I told them the new uniform was going to be none at all. They quit in protest, and that was fine with me. I wanted to start with fresh people anyway. I figured it would only be fair to offer the chance to stay with us, but none of them did.”

None of them wanted to stay with you. Well, thought Eveline to herself, that’s a no-brainer.

Mr. Silman continued: “Anyhow, through trial and error, and some correspondence with Vienna, we’ve worked out the most effective use for nude presenters. The presenter is there to be eye candy and a distraction, but she can’t be too much of a distraction. At first we let the presenters wear make-up and jewelry, but that drew too much attention from our sales items. Same goes for things such as tattoos, fake breasts, and tan-lines. We don’t hire anyone with tattoos or any kind of augmentation, and if a prospective hire has tan-lines, we request that she gets rid of them before she goes up on stage. Simple and natural is best, we found out. The same goes for positioning and expression. No over-doing the seductive look, a simple friendly smile works best. No exaggerated posturing, just position your body to draw attention to the moment’s bid item.”