1. Little Lost Elf
Poor little lost Elf, fell off of the shelf,
He had strayed too close to the edge.
Fell in Santa’s sack and couldn’t get back.
Tied up, it was placed on the sledge.

In spite of his yells, drowned out by sleigh bells,
Little Elf was filled with dismay.
The reindeer took off and soon were aloft.
Santa was on his merry way.

Up into the air, the Elf wondered where
At the end of the line he’d be,
Thrown out on his head, left somewhere for dead,
Or under some far Christmas tree?

Elf found out the truth, stopped at the next roof
The sack undone by Santa Claus.
As St Nick’s fists sift, to find the right gift,
The Elf passed one up without pause.

The gift came to hand, “To Tracey & And”,
Old Nick squints in order to see.
“With greatest respects, I brought the wrong specs,
Without Elf, Christmas couldn’t be!”

So throughout the night, every parcel was right.
Elf’s choice was hot, without a blot,
The gifts which they’d wished, so no child was missed,
Every child got, that was the lot.

“There’s none could compare, with Elf we’re a pair,
“Elf’s helping hand’s best in the land.
“Gorgeous or mingers, bell ringers, singers,
“Let the bells ring, let voices sing!”

The sleigh returned home, cheered each Elf and Gnome,
Both safely back with empty sack,
Boxes were crossed, Elf’s job card embossed:
The Elf once lost, now the Elves’ Boss!

2. Winter’s Glow

You cannot beat the smell of wood smoke,
Coming from the fire bright,
See the flames lick cherry, pine or oak,
Yule logs burning well alight.

We warm our hands, drive chill from toes,
While Grandmas toast and Grandpas doze.

While it’s fun to play out in the cold,
Children soon freeze, hands like ice,
Come in the warm, and cross the threshold,
You’ll be cosy in a trice.

We warm our hands, drive chill from toes,
While Grandmas toast and Grandpas doze.

Little faces glow around the blaze
‘Til jumpers feel much drier.
Without fail the kids love to always
Toast marshmallows on the fire.

We warm our hands, drive chill from toes,
While Grandmas toast and Grandpas doze.

As weariness works throughout the troupe,
Soon those little eyelids droop,
Mummy and Daddy will soon be here
To make those grandkids disappear.

We’ve warmed our hands, we’re in repose,
Whilst Grandmas chill and Grandpas doze.

3. It’s Time to Switch on All the Lights
It’s time to switch on all the lights,
The illuminations in the towns.
The shoppers flock to see the sights
Of glitter snowflakes and golden crowns.

Eat roasted chestnuts, hot mince pies,
While you shop and shop to heart’s content.
Shop helpers wearing Santa’s guise
While helping select the right present.

It’s hard work shopping ‘til you drop,
With queues and waiting, it’s never quick.
So spare a thought you guys who shop
With mechanical mouse and button click!

4. Christmas in Shanty Town
Shanty town wakes to bell and horn
Heaven comes to those forlorn,
The carol singers come around,
Fill the air with heaven’s sound.
To seek the homeless,
Alone and hopeless,
Taking to them a Christmas morn.

The volunteers find all the ways
The homeless in shop doorways,
The singers seek them where they may
Hidden alleys where they lay.
Awakened with sweet tea,
Hot mince pies for free,
Bringing to them the holidays.

Never was a more cheery throng,
Gathered round to hear each song.
Then presents, rounds of socks and hats,
Thick blankets and groundsheet mats,
Shared around the group,
Then warm bread and soup,
Christmas for all, we sing along.

5. Santa’s sack
Santa’s sack is full of toys
Diff ‘rent gifts for girls and boys
Wrapped and tied with satin bows
Making sure that nothing shows.

Santa comes but once a year,
He’s overhead, now he’s here!
Ev’ry child will find success,
Santa’s sack is bottomless!

Santa’s sack is big and red,
Comes when you have gone to bed.
Close your eyes and fall asleep,
When Santa comes — do not peep!

6. A donkey’s Christmas
“Hey Ginny, Hinny, Josephine,
You’ll never guess where I’ve been!”
“To Bethlehem, we know you Ass,
It’s written on your travel pass,
We’re Donkeys hired for goods or folk,
Come on Ass, what was the joke?”

“No joking but the night was wild,
A girl I carried, full with child.
Inn too full, in a stable stayed,
Her man on his knees and prayed.
While shepherds flocked in with their sheep,
She birthed a babe who wouldn’t weep.

“He smiled and gurgled, charmed us all,
Playing there in that rude stall.
Then a heavenly choir began to sing,
It was crowded, there’s the thing,
Invaded like under attack,
They pushed poor me right to the back.

“Angels sang in harmony tight,
Stable flooded in starlight.
Three Wise Men came with four gifts piled,
Three brought specially for the child,
But wisest Magi of the three
Brought a carrot just for me!”

7. Christmas Office Party Kisses

Kissing under the mistletoe,
Is that as far as you will go?
Tell me, are you interested,
In ending up in a double bed?

Kissing under the mistletoe,
Is that as far as you will go?

We’ve worked together many a year.
What do we know? What do we fear?
You are single and so am I,
Do we let this moment pass us by?

Kissing under the mistletoe,
Is that as far as you will go?

What have we got to go home to?
Late night movie, Radio 2?
All we deserve and nothing more,
Lonely this Christmas like all before.

Kissing under the mistletoe,
Is that as far as you will go?

Your lips are warm and so are mine,
You taste as sweet as dessert wine,
We kiss our fill, we are merry,
Let’s kiss again, one for each berry.

Kissing under the mistletoe,
Is that as far as you will go?

Takes two to tango, don’t you know,
Hold on tight I won’t let you go.
You and me, we could have such fun,
We melt together as if we’re one.

Kissing under the mistletoe,
Is that as far as you will go?

Take no chances, make no mistake,
It’s happiness that is at stake.
The day we met I’ll never rue
Since then I have always fancied you.

Kissing under the mistletoe,
I think it’s time that we should go.

The years have passed without regret,
Ev’ry Christmas is better yet,
We’re old and grey, but kisses sweet,
To embrace and kiss is still our treat.

Kissing under the mistletoe,
From spring to winter, rain or snow.

8. Little lost fairy
I’m a little lost fairy
Will you listen to my plea?
Spare a moment if you’re free,
Help me find a Christmas tree.