Chapter 4: Home Alone

I would like to say the trip down on Thursday was painless, it wasn’t. I definitely had my meds before we left, although it seemed to wear off damned quick! All the guys from the station were outside with the fire engine’s blues and twos going while they saw me off. The guys in the air ambulance were marvellous, I can’t praise them high enough. Soon I was back in my old home town and among familiar southern accents again. The place even smelled like home. I knew that whatever happened, whoever I ended up living with, I wanted to be back in Pompey again. I guess the whole trip took four or five hours but to me it seemed like it lasted the whole day. I was exhausted by the time I got to Mandy’s house, my old house, in the late afternoon.

They were all there to greet me when the ambulance brought me from the general hospital, Mandy, Madge, the kids, naturally. The big surprise was that even Sally was there. Later, as Mandy and Madge shooed the kids away to do their homework before tea, leaving Sally and I alone for a few minutes, Sally owned up that the surprise was all down to Mandy. On the Sunday before Mandy departed she had suggested that Sally come down and she had agreed, taking a couple of days off work.

Mandy brought our meals through to the old dining room where my bed was set up and left Sally and I alone to talk. Sally was going to be sleeping in the sitting room, Mandy had a sofa bed in there, for Sally to use on the Friday and Saturday nights she came down to visit, with the addition of Thursday night this first week. Mandy had to work for one more day this week and three the next week before the schools broke up for the long summer holiday. Sally would look after me Friday, then they would share the nursing duties over the weekend before Sally travelled home on the train on Sunday afternoon and evening. Apparently, Mandy had arranged for Madge to look after me on Monday through to Wednesday. I groaned, not looking forward to that.

The evening was fun, actually. I was tired and in pain from all the jostling I had suffered earlier but we played games with a lot of laughs and Sally was very relaxed and seemed to be getting on particularly well with my two girls.

Eventually Mandy could see I was tiring, and it was still a school night for the kids, so they were shooed off to get ready for bed and Sally washed me and helped me clean my teeth before it was lights out. I think I slept sounder that night than I had in weeks.

Everybody was busy getting off to school in the morning, Sally was up early and assured Mandy that she would clean up the breakfast things and make the beds after them, so she packed them off and then got me my breakfast. I was mobile enough now to use the toilet on my own. My shoulder and wrist were able to take the strain of crutches for short bursts but my ribs were still threatening to burst, so I needed a lot of help getting down. There may not have been much of Sally build-wise but she was strong and helped me with that and have a wash down in the downstairs cloakroom, although it was so tight-fitting that we spilled out into the hallway!

I had a health visitor come give me the once-over mid-morning. She checked me against her notes and assessed I was ready for physiotherapy and got busy on the phone getting me booked in daily from Monday.

It was a relief to lie down on the bed again after the examination and prodding. Then Sally went and jumped my bones, God bless her! She was on top and very energetic. The house was empty and we could let ourselves go without upsetting anyone.

Phew! To say I needed that would be an understatement. We laughed like kids afterwards, and she decided I needed another blanket bath. Still giggling, that bath led to a repeat session, only much less frenetic and a lot more loving.

Sally prepared a light lunch while I managed to sit with my broken leg outstretched in the kitchen. I had another lie-down and dozed for a little while, as Sally cleaned up the kitchen. When she came back and woke me up gently, we went for third time lucky and certainly I couldn’t believe how much luck I was having!

I think Mandy sensed what had gone on between us when she came in that evening. Sally and I kept giggling, sharing our little secret that didn’t appear to be very secret at all. Mandy had a strange look on her face during that evening that I couldn’t read exactly but it did make me feel uneasy.

Then I began to feel guilty, I couldn’t help it. Unfaithful, I was, Mandy was still my wife and we were living under her roof. She had invited Sally into her home on unspoken trust and I felt that between us Sally and I had let her down. It didn’t matter what Mandy had done with Gosford Tanner, that was for her to deal with as I had dealt with it in my own way. This time it was me that had crossed the line and I felt really bad about it.

It was great having Sally there though, over that first weekend out of hospital, and the girls loved her too and when Sally wasn’t lavishing attention on me, she was huddled with the girls, whispering and laughing about things that girls discuss that were beyond my comprehension. Those moments made it feel that we were becoming like a family, an odd one, I had to admit, but that is how I felt.

I began to entertain the idea of spending the rest of my life with Sally and enjoying our extended family.

Sunday afternoon Sally said her goodbyes and went off to catch the train home. I got out of bed for a while and sat with Mandy watching a bit of TV, but nothing really took my interest and Mandy clearly didn’t want to talk to me, so I went back to bed for an early night. Relations were understandably strained between us to say the least.

Next morning everybody bustled round getting off to work, with Mandy taking my beat-up old car to work leaving her smart and spacious people carrier behind for her mother to use to take me to physiotherapy.

Madge turned up mid-morning and treated me like dirt as usual. I tried to ignore her, but with some difficulty on my part.

I managed to haul myself into the front passenger seat with the seat pushed back as far as possible and was able to get my leg, encased in a single cast, in and nurse my crutches on the journey. We set off in frosty silence. It didn’t last long though before Madge spoke up.

“I don’t know how you can sit there all innocent-like and bring that woman you are having an affair with to stay under the same roof as your wife and family,” Madge said bitterly.

“I didn’t invite her to stay Madge, Mandy did. I understood Sally was going to stay in a hotel; they changed the arrangements between themselves. I was not consulted, took no part in the decision process and was, as usual, the last one to know.”

“Well, Amanda is a saint, I certainly wouldn’t put up with it under my roof. In fact, I wouldn’t even take you back in the house, if it was my choice.”

“Well, she’s not you, is she?”

“You don’t deserve Amanda,” Madge snapped, “Why she allowed you home and is prepared to look after you, is beyond me.”

“Well, I don’t know why either, and I don’t have any choice in the matter. I don’t want to be here any more than you want me here.”

“So what the hell are you doing back here anyway?”

“I don’t know that either, you’ll have to ask Mandy. She was the one that had me evicted from my digs, she even stole my bloody car from me. I would have been more than happy enough to have gone back to my digs, because I didn’t have to move out for another four or five months. Any of the lads from the service would have ferried me about for a few weeks until I got back on my feet.”

“Amanda must still be in love with you, then, Lord only knows why. She rang me in tears on Saturday morning because she knew that you and that girl had had sex in her house. She should divorce you just for that alone, even forgetting about the desertion for the last five years.”

“She’d had plenty of time in those five years to divorce me if she wanted to.”

“So she should have done, especially when she found out where you were, then she should have claimed all the back spousal support that you owe, especially for the kids. It must add up to thousands.”

“There isn’t any back support owing, Madge. I started sending money to her from week one, in fact since Mandy saw me in hospital the other week and gave me their account numbers I’ve been sending their money directly into their trust funds.”

“Oh, I didn’t know, she didn’t say.” Madge was getting quieter.

“And as for spousal support, I should be getting money from her!” I grinned.

“No, that’s not right, not right at all!” she exploded, “You left her and the children for no good reason other than whatever shenanigans you were getting up to and then carrying on an adulterous relationship with that floozie behind her back!”

“Except for the fact, Madge, that Mandy was the one who committed adultery first-”

“What?!” interposed Madge, who almost put her foot down and was close to colliding with the car in front.

“Yes, Mandy had the affair, with Gosford bloody Tanner, so I was left with little choice, either accept that Mandy didn’t love me any more and hadn’t for a long time, or I move on with my own life. I moved on.”

“But when did she have an affair?”

“When? After you had spent every single opportunity you could to split us up ever since we became a couple. Eventually Mandy thought the grass was a whole lot greener elsewhere, so that’s when she started sleeping with her boss.”

“What?”

“Gosford bloody Tanner, her department boss. I caught them in bed together at a party. She told me it was the first time, but they looked like they were getting a lot more practice together than I ever got. I left them to it, packed my bags that night and left. I hoped I would never return.”

“I know she did have some trouble with someone bothering her at work and put in a sexual harassment against him.”

“Perhaps the grass wasn’t so much greener with her boss than she thought then. Maybe Mandy wanted to spread her net wider?”

“But she’s never been out with anyone since you left, I babysit whenever she does and it is usually for functions at work or because she has to attend courses. She’s never brought anyone home that I know of and the children have never said anything.”

“Well she certainly doesn’t want me back other than nearby so that I can see the kids, she had made that clear over the years before that last straw broke the camel’s back.”

“But she’s always loved you,” Madge insisted, “Even when I-”

“Yes even when you where poisoning her mind against me, I know. Every time she came back from seeing you she used to snipe at me, especially about improving my job prospects. Everything I did wasn’t good enough for her ... or for you. I lived with it for a while, but once she started sleeping with her boss, that was the finish as far as I was concerned.”

“Well she certainly acts as though she still loves you, I can’t understand why. I never could understand why.”

“Whatever she felt about me at one time, it is definitely all over and done with now.”