Chapter 83

“Are you coming?” My futon said. The furniture sounded just like my Auntie Mom.

“Where?”

“Breakfast and water skiing.” The covers shrugged off and Surprise stood. A naked Mom is sure to make me feel childish. A well fucked Aunt Surprise is a sight to behold.

“No.”

“Why not?”

“I promised my kayak a good sanding,” I said.

Even though Surprise was standing ... the covers kept moving ... a hairy arm assaulted my eye. Mom was NOT alone.

Mom was not the only naked human on my futon. Mom and the arm were not the only nudists in my shipping container.

Surprise, the arm ... and what ever it was attached ... and me ... sadly lacking in apparel...

“Holy Chit...” the head of my near neighbor, Jimmy Nice Guy, looked right at me.

“ERK!” I didn’t have enough hands for cover. But, the shock had me rooted to the floor. Just for a second ... well ... maybe 5 seconds ... an eternity ... then I spun and headed for my bed.

“Mel, she looks just like you!”

Surprise Me Flintkote has used a nom de plume, an alias, for as long as I’ve known her ... Melody ... people tend to titter at the name, Surprise. Surprise has the reason down pat... ‘it’s a suthern thing.’

‘She looks just like you’. Did he mean front or back ... or both?

<Face ... he meant face.>

I almost believed them ... until they giggled.

Then I peeked around my door. He was standing next to the futon. Now I know why Surprise looked freshly ... umh ... fucked. Is that a standard model?

I could feel the six look. Two was still in bed.

<Nope ... that’s a big one.>

The male components of the Seven thought, <Yup ... big one ... damnation.>

The female components tittered.

Not average?

<Not even.>

Thank god. I’d been thinking... . And I blushed.

Surprise was still standing ... if twined around Jimmy Nice Guy is standing. Then she did something ... I don’t know what ... but he fell backwards on my poor futon and a certain appendage found a hiding place.

At least I didn’t have to see it ... that doesn’t mean I didn’t look... ‘cause I did.

Surprise looked ... surprised.

I hit the shower ... and ... well ... what do you think ... yup ... that.

My fingers decided that I liked washing ... there ... when I was ten. I was pretty religious about it.

About half an hour later, Surprise came to the bathroom door and said, “If you’re going to sand your boat ... get on with it. We need the shower.”

“Yes, mom.”

I keep a lot of my clothes in the closet next to the bathroom. Khaki cargo shorts, a knotted tee, steel toed shoes and a dust mask and I was out the door.

Wish I hadn’t promised. The beach and water skiing sounded like fun.

But ... I did promise. The sander came out of the tool closet and the extension cord was plugged in. By the time Jimmy and Surprise came out looking clean, I was really dusty.

“We’ll be back before dark thirty.”

They were ‘Hiyo silver away’ in my Volvo.

Two said, “I wanna go water skiing. You and your damned work ethic.”

You wouldn’t believe what Two can do.

She grabbed a second sander and started in ... not a single speck of dust touched her.

My dust doubled.