Chapter 4: Waking Up From the Dream World

He had fallen down the rabbit hole, he had gone to see how deep it goes. He had chosen the red pill and actually understood the reference. It was an unusual sensation. More unusual than normal, not that anything about this was usual. He wondered how the others who went back in time fixed this issue or even if they had this issue.

James sighed, it was an internal sigh because, as yet, he could not even make so much as a sound, which was incredibly frustrating. Still, he could remember.

He was definitely more perceptive. He could hear more clearly and there was a level of clarity to his thought that was electric. ‘I was blind, but now I see.’

As the day wore on, James soon discovered that not only was he able to think more clearly than before, but he was also able to access his memories better.

James lay in bed searching through his memories. He could remember stuff from when he was very young, including memories of him breastfeeding, on to his old age, and even his last moments including his trial and afterward his conversation with Death. One by one, he recalled all his experiences from his previous lifetime.

Hell, he could even sit there and watch entire seasons of the Simpsons. He’d seen every one, including the new episodes that, in his opinion, were not that good. He simply recalled them, brought them up, and watched them as though he were watching it on TIVO.

“Ah, so, kids, caught anything?”

Lisa Simpson looked up, “Not yet, sir.”

“Uh-huh,” The Reporter said with a nod, “What are you using for bait?”

Lisa said, “My brother’s using worms, but I, who feel the tranquility far outweighs the actual catching of fish, am using nothing.”

James mentally laughed.

As everything became organized he found that there was no difficulty in refilling the irrelevant or unimportant and storing them in a “hold till further notice” compartment where they did not interfere with his analysis. Other items were put in order so that they established a natural progression.

Against that skeletal organization, he resurrected the scuttlebutt he had heard: the gossip, malicious or otherwise, and casual phrases which he had heard while unconscious. Apparently, the stories were true - patients who were unconscious or under anesthesia could still hear and remember what was said.

The further the structure grew, and the more coherent, the more significant new items became, and the easier it was to fit them in. The next few days were spent inside his own mind, searching through all of the information there; it was a true nostalgic trip. Everything he’d ever read, heard, or seen was now organized and available.

‘Here it is, here you go.’

His own thoughts were interrupted when he heard the clip clop of a lady’s heeled shoes in the hallway approaching his door.

‘Probably pumps, ‘ he guessed. ‘I know that the nurses probably wear tennis shoes. I suspect that Sugar wears flats of some sort. That leaves Babe, ‘ he reckoned, as the door opened.

“Hello, James.”

‘Nailed it, ‘ he inwardly smiled.

“Do you know what day it is today?” she asked, as the door shut with a ‘snick’. He didn’t know, not that he could answer her. “It’s the 23rd of March.”

He checked his brain’s new mental calendar.

‘How did I get through life without one?’ he mused, ‘Here we go. Back in 1985, or now in 1985, should I say, it’s Saturday. Aw, crap, I’m missing Saturday morning cartoons.’

“It’s a very special day,” Babe said interrupting his trail of thought.

‘Oh?’

She put something down on what was probably a flat surface next to his bed.

‘That sweet smell reminds me of... ‘ James mentally flipped through his memories. ‘Aha, icing! Is it a cake?’

Something moderately heavy was dropped onto his bed and then a clasp of some sort was opened. There was a slight rattling noise, a dry rustle sound and then he heard her scrape something, resulting in a short hissing sound.

‘That sound -- a match?’ The pungent smell of Sulfur and wood confirmed what he thought, though he inwardly frowned, ‘why would she be lighting a match?’ The smell of something else soon followed. ‘Burning wax? Candles?’

There was the sound of shoes outside James’ door. It sounded like it might be flats. ‘That’s probably Sugar, ‘ James guessed, as the door opened again.

“Mrs. Smith.”

“Hello, Lisa,” Mrs. Smith responded.

‘Missus Smith?’ Considering his new body’s age, James realized with stark clarity that Babe was probably his new body’s mother. ‘Oh, damn.’ He didn’t feel any guilt about his sexual musings about Babe however, as he had had the same feelings about his own mother, so there was no worry on that end.

“You don’t mind if we join you, do you?”

“Oh! Of course not. The more the merrier.”

The sound of several sneaker-clad feet soon followed and James inwardly smiled as the group started clucking like a group of hens. “Oh my goodness, it’s all of you! You didn’t need to bring anything!” Babe/Mrs. Smith protested.

“Don’t worry, we all know how special James is.” Sugar/Lisa disarmingly replied.

“-And we’re just as sure that he’ll pull through,” interrupted Whisper. “Most of these are for you to use, but we also pooled together and bought a few educational books on tape.”

“-These are the most recommended ones on high school mathematics and science,” Happy jumped in. “My sister-in-law used them to help keep her kids ahead in school.”

“I don’t have any kids, I mean, that my husband wants us to wait,” Lips added, awkwardly, “But we also thought that it might help James when you’re not here, or if -- I mean when -- he wakes up. He’ll have to undergo a lot of physical therapy before he’ll be able to get out of bed unassisted.”

“Thank you all for your help and best wishes. All of this depends on whether or not he actually wakes up,” she sighed and placed her hand on the rail. “I hope he does, I pray every day for his recovery.”

“As do we all,” Lips said with a smile.

Babe went around and thanked everyone.

He could hear something being opened, “I’m opening some of your presents, Mr. and Mrs. Smith sent you a nice present. Oh look, a custom belt buckle and belt.”

‘Nice, ‘ he thought with a chuckle.

“And my parents got you something as well.” James mentally nodded as he heard her tearing open the wrapping. “It looks like my mother and father gave you some nice presents. A nice leather wallet, and a fifty dollar gift voucher inside.”

‘Dollars? Oh, right, American money.’

James lost the rest of the conversation in the babble of nurses. He heard someone inhale deeply and then blow steadily, followed by the acrid smoke from what must have been candles.

‘It must have been a birthday cake. Well, happy birthday to me, I guess.’

“Happy fifteenth birthday, James,” Mrs. Smith serenely, if a bit sadly, proclaimed. “I blew out the candles and made a wish for you.”

James heard her ask Lisa if she could bring some plates, and then pulled out something metallic, or so it sounded, from whatever she had put on his bed. She then said, “I’ll save some for you, James. If you wake up this week, you can have some.”

‘Deal.’

One by one, James heard the nurses give their best wishes to Babe, or Rebecca to use her real name, and depart. As each one departed they gave him a kiss on the cheeks and hoped he would wake up.

Happy was the first to leave. “Thank you for allowing us to share in this special day for James, Rebecca,” she warmly thanked Babe. “No, thank you for coming, Josephine. It would have been lonely for me to celebrate James’ birthday by myself.” Rebecca sounded genuinely sincere in her response.

“Please, it’s a day off. All of us were glad to drop by to see the both of you. Now I’m going home to feed my cat, but I’ll see you on Monday,” Josephine reassured her. She gave her farewells to the other nurses and then left; the door’s opening and closing signaled her departure. After a few minutes, Lips was the next person to leave.

“I should probably head off as well. My husband’s planning to have his friends over to watch college basketball, and that means I’ll have to get some snacks ready for them,” Lips complained.

“I’m sorry that you couldn’t stay longer, Carolyn. I really appreciate all of the help and support you and the rest of girls have given me,” Rebecca responded.

Once everyone was gone, Rebecca went out for a break. He could hear angry comments, from both her and someone else and he could make an angry exchange between them.

He swore he heard something along the lines of, ‘he should just be allowed to die with dignity.’

‘What an asshole, ‘ James thought.

James heard her heels come rushing back to him. There were sobbing sounds, the creaking of metal, and a slight movement in the bed, as if she was leaning on his bed for support. He felt someone grab his hand. The hands felt smaller than his, more delicate, but they possessed a lot of strength. After a few seconds of hearing someone (was it Babe?) sobbing, he felt drops of something warm and wet fall onto his hand. Were they teardrops? Was Babe crying?

James sighed. Babe’s grip on his hand tightened.

He wondered, was that an internal sigh? No, he clearly heard himself sigh and apparently, so did Babe.

“James?”

James tried to answer, but his mouth didn’t respond. He tried to squeeze her hand instead. Nothing. He tried much harder. His finger twitched.

“James?”

He tried again and again. Another finger twitched, and then another, until he finally gripped her hand. He tried to open his eyes to see her. They felt heavy, like lead, but eventually his eyes fluttered and opened just a crack before he looked at her -- if that’s who the blur was.

“Oh my God.”

He tried to speak but found he couldn’t.

Rebecca could hardly believe it. She had hoped and prayed for this, now was almost paralyzed when it did. Finally, she shook herself and, forcing herself not to scream from joy, dashed out of the room to get a nurse.

“Nurse!” she called. “Nurse! James is awake! Come quickly, please!” Rebecca was doing her best not to scream but her voice was still excited and a bit loud.

The nurse looked at the excited woman and, rounding the counter of the nursing station, grabbed her shoulders to calm her down and said, “Slow down, get ahold of yourself. How do you know? Are you sure? What makes you think he’s awake?”

Rebecca took a deep breath and forced herself calm. “His hand moved!” she said, starting to cry from the emotion she was feeling but keeping her voice low. “He tried to talk to me!”

It had been so long the nurse was a bit sceptical, but she headed Rebecca back to her son’s room so she could see for herself before calling a doctor.

When they got there, James was obviously awake and lucid. His eyes followed them as they moved and he was trying to talk. The nurse immediately grabbed the phone in the room and called for the on-duty doctor. She then went to the bed.

“Don’t try to talk,” she told James. “You have a feeding tube installed and you won’t be able to speak until it’s removed. You could damage your vocal cords trying to speak. The doctor is on his way and he’ll take care of you very quickly.”

As she said this, the door opened and a doctor appeared. He took a quick look at James, then some of the instruments, and began talking. “James, it’s nice of you to join us,” he quipped with a small smile. “Please don’t try to speak until we get the feeding tube removed. You won’t be able to anyway, and you may bruise your vocal cords. For now, relax as best you can. I imagine you may be tired, it can be a lot of work to wake up as you have so don’t fight it if you feel yourself falling asleep, just let yourself go.”

James wanted to stay awake, despite what the doctor said, but found he couldn’t resist and was soon sound asleep.

Time passed, but he didn’t know how much. He was so tired all of the time, but, now he was awake again. He had been awake briefly several times, enough so the feeding tube was gone and some of the other connections had also been removed. There were still a lot of tubes and wires that were connected, but progress had been made. It was nice to be able to talk and eat normally. His voice was still raspy, but he guessed it was a start.

“James?”

Now that he was more aware, he knew that he couldn’t speak, as his throat was still sore, raw and unused, but he was able to nod.

“You’re awake,” she let out a strangled sob.

Her eyes shone.

He nodded again.

“We can talk afterwards, thank God in Heaven that you are alive.”

All of the effort to do just a few things seemed to exhaust James. His eyes closed and he sighed again, falling asleep. As he fell asleep, he heard more people enter the room and heard the excited chatter that started up around him, his lips curled into a smile as he fell asleep. Time passed, but he didn’t know how much. He was so tired all of the time, but, now he was awake again. He had been awake briefly several times, enough so they removed the feeding tube to allow him to start to eat normally, if the stuff they were serving him was normal, and speak. He guessed it was a start.

Better than nothing, he mused.

His blue eyes fluttered open, looking groggily up at the now familiar, but generic, ceiling. He groaned and looked around although he could not move much.