Chapter 21

Before I could even make it to the door I felt a hand around my arm. It was a very familiar touch. I wanted to be wrapped in the arms that belonged to that hand. But I wanted to get away even more so I said, “Dad, let me go to my room.” I paused and the hand was still there. “Please.”

I was now free. Nobody followed me to my room. I looked outside and saw my new car and then noticed that everyone was still out there. They were acting as if nothing had happened. I watched as Bree looked over the car.

After looking over the back seat I heard Bree say, “Will a baby seat really fit in this car? Will two fit?”

What was that thing about two baby seats about? Was she planning on bringing Erin’s baby on rides with us? I thought about that and I kind of liked that idea. Or was she wanting to impregnate me again after this baby was born, just in case this wasn’t hers. I could live with that. In fact, I wouldn’t mind having many babies with her. And as crazy as it sounds I’d still like to have babies with my Dad.

“Sure it can. This car only resembles the car it was modeled after. I only want the best for my daughter and her family,” Dad said.

The voices got quieter after that but I could still hear noises. I believe I heard my name from time to time. And I think I even heard something about my condition thrown in there too. Then my Mom looked up and saw me in the window. She smiled and waved.

I opened my window even farther and called from my second-story room, “Finally found my cell phone. Would anyone mind if I order pizza? I’m craving one of their pasta bread bowls.” All three of them said they’d like a pizza. “I’ll be down after I make the call.” I went to my bed and pulled my phone out from under my pillow and made the call. After I made the call I internally chewed myself out, “Did I say I found my cell phone? Nobody says that anymore. They just say phone. That’s so outdated.”

While we were waiting for the pizza my Mom and Bree went inside to prepare things and to talk about stuff. I admired my car. The seats were so comfortable. I could drive this car all day and not be sore.

My daydream of taking Bree and my child out somewhere was interrupted when my Dad said, “I hope what Bree said about thinking what I was going to ask for didn’t offend you.”

I kept my eyes on my steering wheel and said, “It didn’t. I was just surprised she’d say that in front of you that’s all. I hope it didn’t offend you.”

“To be honest I had actually thought about asking if you’d like to have sex with me again. Your Mother is okay with the idea,” he said.

I tensed, “For just the one time, or would she let you have sex with me as much as we’d like?”

“We? Hmm. She’s said often that she’d want us to have sex as much as we’d like. I think part of her reasoning is that she’s not sure if pregnancy really cures your condition or not,” Dad told me.

I finally looked away from the steering wheel and at my Dad, “You’re the first person I ever pictured myself doing it with. In fact, that’s the main reason I made the vow to not have sex until marriage. I thought that If I could hold to that I would be able to talk myself out of asking you for it in the first place. I figured you’d either go along with it out of some sense of responsibility. Or you’d laugh it off and stop giving me treatments after you found a different treatment for me. But when I started having sex with you I never wanted to stop, I just wish that I hadn’t been so out of my mind when we did it.” I gathered my thoughts for a moment. I was happy that he didn’t interrupt that process. “I’m afraid if we do it as often as I’d like to it would hurt Bree. And I can’t do that. I love her too much to hurt her. She says she’d like us to do it at least once. But that may have just been her trying to humor me or something.”

I saw a weird smile cross my Dad’s face. Not pervy weird but it was in a way I couldn’t figure out if he was happy, sad, confused, just putting on a brave face, or something else entirely.

He reached over and caressed my cheek and kissed my forehead before saying, “Bree loves you very much. Back when she asked me for permission to propose to you she told me that she had a feeling that you wanted to make love to me. And she told me that if you and I really did want to do that after you were married she’d want us to continue with it. And today she reassured me that truly does accept us having sex. She even said that she’d be fine if you and Steven had sex from time to time. But only on your safe days. You know the crazy thing about all of this? I actually do want to have sex with you. As much as I love Kim and how great she is in bed I’d really like to continue having sex with you.”