Chapter 4

I’d closed up the house in Columbus for the summer, arranged for mowing and all those other annoying details and had moved into the old house for one more summer. I had been there only one day when I realized how much I was missing Maddie, and just knew that feeling wouldn’t go away until I moved back to Columbus and she and Chuck joined me.

The house seemed the same, but Granny didn’t. Auntie said she had taken Mother’s death particularly hard and it seemed to be affecting her not only emotionally but physically as well. She seemed more hunched over, very feeble in things she did and much more pale than she usually was. Auntie said she almost never left the house, ate very little and has gotten so she talked very little as well. We were both worried – she wasn’t that old yet. She just suddenly seemed much older than she was.

Thurston was still there and, when I was getting out of the car actually knocked me flat on the ground, getting in one of those big licks while I was down. So, we just sat there by the car door, getting to know each other again while Auntie stood on the porch, trying to look disgusted at the licking, but unable to keep the grin from lighting her face.

There were lots of walks and runs through the woods, runs that avoided that one path and walks that usually went down the road, away from the Anderson house. Auntie told me there was still no sign of Duane and that Auden was in Atlanta, apparently doing well, which was not a surprise at all. The Anderson’s were talking about selling the house, with both boys gone but nothing had happened yet. There were a few trips though, up the road, past the Anderson’s to the little Methodist church and its cemetery. I was amazed that Thurston seemed to be able to sense that this was a special and quiet place and he would lay beside me as I sat by Mother’s tombstone, the entire area smelling of freshly mowed grass. Each time, I remembered all the people who had gathered here, people who I would never know but who knew my mother in a way that I never had. I had been far too absorbed in Serena to see that part of her. I didn’t know how, but I hoped that finally realizing that would change me in some way.

Although the days sometimes seemed to drag, I was amazed at how quickly it was time to pack up and head to the other house. Auntie told me that would get worse as I got older, time passing so quickly. I got a huge hug from Auntie and I tried to be as delicate as I could in hugging Granny. I think I held the hug far longer than normal as I had a premonition that it might be the last one we’d share. I fought the tears until I was in the car and out of the driveway.

It was the next day that Maddie returned from Florida. I picked her up at the airport and when we got home, Chuck’s car was in front of the house. I’d left the door unlocked for him. Maddie was frantically getting out of the car when I spoke.

“I need to get some, um, errands run. Be back in one ... no two hours, okay?”

There were no tears but it was definitely a teary look of thanks that I got in return.

I stretched it to two and a half hours and returned with three blizzards from Dairy Queen.

“Thought you guys might need ice cream to cool off a little,” I joked when I was inside.

Maddie blushed but Chuck just looked at her. I was beginning to get the feeling that I’d like what they had, but I was in no hurry. I knew there had to be another Chuck somewhere but I wasn’t sure I could be the Maddie that that Chuck needed. They were each so one-of-a-kind.

We were sophomores now, totally acclimated and ready to attack the new year. Except, of course, I was now a business major and had to find my way around a new set of buildings.

It was only the second week of school when my premonition came to fruition.

Auntie called to tell me that Granny had passed in her sleep last night. I quickly told my professors what had happened and that I’d be away a few days but would make everything up as quickly as I could. Each gave me their condolences and said that was fine. Once I got there, I held Auntie as she cried, the first time I had ever seen that from her. Then, I set about making the arrangements. The Methodist church would be used again but I knew the guests would be very limited. Just a few friends and very little family.

Maddie and Chuck went with me of course. Thurston loved them both. The few handfuls of dirt this time were barely visible on the top of the casket. It was sad but Maddie reminded me that this simple woman had produced my mother who had done so much, which led to me that still had a life to live and had given her the best friend anyone could wish for. Tears seemed to come easily when I was around her.

The grave was right beside mother’s and now Thurston and I would have two places to visit during the summer. It was hard to say goodbye when I had to head back for school. Things seemed to be changing here and I wasn’t content with how they were changing. They could only change in one way but it was still hard for me to accept that. Inevitability hung over me like a bad dream that I would never awaken from.

Of course, in a way that I had come to expect, Maddie reminded me when we were home again that, despite my losses, I still had so much and, at my age, had so much ahead of me. I hated to be negative after that so I didn’t comment about the thoughts I’d been having.

As the school year progressed, I found opportunities to leave them alone in the house while I made fantasy trips for errands that didn’t exist. Sometimes I just pulled around the corner and would study for an hour or however long I’d told them I’d be gone. I think they probably guessed some of that but they didn’t say anything. They needed time to themselves where they could be as uninhibited as they chose. I sometimes secretly wished I had recordings, so I could listen in on their ecstasy but I wasn’t going to do that. I guess it was just an unconscious and submerged yearning for some of the same.

Before we knew it, summer was approaching. Maddie and I had talked and, of course, I’d agreed to what she wanted if she could work it out. She’d found a summer job in Columbus and had convinced her father to let her stay over, in my house of course. Chuck had scrounged and located a job as well so it would be both of them there. Her father had insisted she at least come home for a week and I had given her money so that Chuck could go too and meet her father. That was a match that I’d do whatever I could to be sure it survived. It worked, and Maddie texted me that her father had immediately fallen in love with Chuck. I texted back that that sounded a little kinky but I was bubbling with joy over the news.

The old house was a bit lonely without Granny there, even though she had barely been there the year before. Auntie was Auntie, a year older but still doing reasonably well. I had arranged for a cleaning lady to come once a week and help her keep things under control, despite her insistence that she didn’t need that and that I shouldn’t spend my money so foolishly. Thurston was still Thurston, although nine years old now with a few gray whiskers around his muzzle.

The house was still wonderful and I did my annual inspection of the back staircase to see if my careful choosing of which foot to put on which tread was making a difference. Nothing I could feel yet but I’d keep up the routine. All the corners were as smooth as ever, they clearly weren’t going to change back to being sharp which somehow reassured me. It was still hard to grasp that this would be mine one day and I’d have to choose whether to live here year-round or keep it as a summer place. Thinking about that always made me sigh.

Our junior years passed with no huge drama. Maddie and Chuck were looking forward to their senior years as, immediately after graduation, there would be a wedding. I told them I’d loan them money to buy a house but they’d have to pay me back. It would be interest-free of course, so that would help in either lowering their payments or allowing them to get a larger house. That decision was theirs to make as they reluctantly agreed to my offer. I would have happily just given them the money but I knew they’d reject that offer outright and I certainly wasn’t about to offend Chuck.

Another summer of seeing things that I denied, as much as reality would allow and senior year was upon me, and upon Maddie and Chuck and about 5,000 others as well.

It was finally over.

The graduation itself was hot and tedious. It was actually very boring, as expected, except for those 10 second segments when each of us received our diplomas. Auntie particularly wanted to be there and I had hired someone to shepherd her from the house and back. I did see her afterward and she was beaming, something that seemed to fill my heart to overflowing. I wished my mother could be there as well. I’m sure she was watching from somewhere.

The following weekend was the wedding. It was in Florida and I was the maid of honor. Maddie’s father, who still looked like an Ohio State football player, was so nice to me and kept telling me how much I meant to Maddie. It was obvious he couldn’t be happier about Maddie’s choice of Chuck as a mate either, and I did all I could to reinforce that, even though it didn’t seem necessary. Maddie had a nursing job with the Mt. Carmel Health System in Columbus and Chuck had gotten a job with Nationwide Insurance there as well. I kept nudging them to find a house and they accused me of just wanting to get rid of them so their ‘squealing and moaning”, as Maddie emphasized, didn’t keep me awake. I was going to miss them but I had gotten a job offer from a real estate company and was anxious to get started at that. Not surprisingly, Maddie and Chuck were my first customers.

It was three years later that I got the call, mid-winter, that something was wrong with Thurston and could I come and see what I could do. I couldn’t get there fast enough and when I arrived, he was laying in his bed and, despite a frantically wagging tail, wasn’t able to get up to greet me. With the strength of desperation, I was able to lift him and carry him to the car and into town to the vet. After an extensive examination, the look on her face told me what I didn’t want to know.