Eighteen

“READY-DOWN. HUT!” Five very large linemen stepped forward as if to crush me when I walked through the door at Bree and Sam’s house. Before they could take another step, five extraordinarily beautiful young women stepped in front of me. The football players came to such an abrupt halt that one actually fell over backward.

“Now that’s what I call an impenetrable line,” Sam laughed from nearby. “Welcome to Seattle Cascades University, Tony!” The line scrambled back to their feet and stepped forward to offer their arms and escort the ladies to the welcome table. Obviously, Bree had set up the guys for exactly this purpose. She and Sonia approached and each grabbed an arm and led me into the main room of the house where music was playing and people were dancing. There must have been 100 people there. As we were walking in, I saw that each girl had a card with a number on it and they made a big show of displaying it to everyone we passed.

“What’s with the numbers?” I asked.

“All the girls have numbers. That’s how the boys will vote to determine who Tony’s girlfriend is. We’re just walking through and campaigning. The guys took your dates to get their numbers. I’m betting none of them get a single vote.”

“That’s not fair,” I said. “No one here knows them.”

“Don’t worry,” Sonia added, “as soon as they are seen with you, someone will put two and two together and they’ll figure out the girls they don’t know are the ones that came with you.”

“By the way, you already know I’m an all-natural redhead because you saw the evidence in Tempe. But did you notice the halo tattoo I’ve got on the inside of my left thigh? I just love it when you kiss it.”

“Bree!” I was a little surprised at hearing this little detail.

“Take notes, honey,” she said. “You need to remember what every girl says or you’ll give away the truth.”

“You know how I love it from behind,” joined in Sonia. “But there’s one place only my boyfriend gets to go.” I was shocked. I’d never done any of that before. I didn’t know what to say. “You’d better remember what we tell you,” Sonia whispered in my ear. Then she licked it!

“Oh Tony, you’re here!” A perky Asian girl about as big as my left thumb jumped up and kissed my cheek, deftly shouldering Bree out of the way. “I was so worried you wouldn’t get here,” she continued, holding her card up for people to see. At about that time, Sonia was dislodged from my other arm and a drop-dead gorgeous black girl who towered over me took my arm and planted a wet kiss on my left cheek.

“Oh baby! Thank god you finally got here. These jocks have been hitting on me all night. Let’s hit the dance floor and show them how you please your baby.” I noticed they were both holding their cards up as we walked toward the dance floor.

“If I’m your boyfriend, I should at least know your names,” I said quietly.

“I’m Rachel,” said the little Asian girl. “I’m a gymnast, but since we don’t have a gymnastics squad at SCU, I play with the cheerleaders. I can bend over backward and look out between my own legs. I’m so flexible you can put me in just about any position you want.” She giggled. I was beginning to get the message. This was going to be a fun night.

“My name’s almost the same as yours,” said the girl on my left. “I’m Tonya, women’s basketball. I’m tall enough that I don’t have to stand on a phone book to do you standing up.” I laughed as all three of us made it to the dance floor. We started rocking out, but it didn’t take long before two more girls cut in on Rachel and Tonya who both kissed me again soundly before they parted. Inside of an hour, I’d danced with at least twenty girls. I was thankful that there was no alcohol at this party because I’d never have remembered half of what they told me. Each girl carefully gave me only one important “fact” about herself, usually having a sexual innuendo or promise attached to it.

My five dates each got a minute with me, too, and they each included one sexual innuendo. “You’re a country boy, Tony. Don’t you love riding horses? For me, going bareback is the only way to do it.” Kate said the line so casually and straight that I turned and stared at her. Then she blushed and kissed me quickly on the lips. I noticed she didn’t stop holding her card out, no matter how embarrassed she got.

“Only one thing I can tell you, honey,” Sandra said. “Remember how big my nipples are? I’ve got something between my legs that’s about the same size.” Sandra moved my hand down onto her butt with the same hand that her number was held in. The girl was amazing.

“I can lick my nose with my tongue,” Amy said to me. “You know what that’s good for, don’t you?” I choked on the coke I was drinking.

“You know, Amy, I hope you win, tonight. I think you are the only girl here I feel safe with.”

“Hey! I’m a lesbian; I’m not dead. I’d swallow your cock whole if it meant I could get into Melody’s panties.”

I was with Amy and Lissa together—a situation I think they contrived—when Lissa leaned in and whispered in my ear, “Just tell them you know how to melt the Ice Queen.” I laughed to hear her use the nickname that people called her on the circuit. “Besides,” she continued, “it’s true.”

A few minutes later, Melody bit my ear and then said, “Just remember, I posed naked for you and it’s my ass that decorates the admin building hall.” She kissed me hard on the lips. She grinned and winked at me while she held her card up for people to see.

I’d noticed that the guys at the party hardly ever spoke to me, but everywhere I looked, several were watching me as they moved from girl to girl. It was around 10:30 p.m. when I was herded into Coach Jacobson’s office. All the guys who could fit in the room were in there and I was pushed down into the desk chair. Then Tim Kost, the basketball captain, started with the questions.

“So Tony, about your girlfriend, uh ... what’s her name?” He made like he was going to tell me something significant, but it was obvious that he wanted me to give a name.

“Which one?” I asked back. All the guys groaned.

“So, I saw her out back with Deke,” one of the football line said. “I wasn’t that close, but she was leaning over the porch railing and he looked like he was having some kind of seizure.” The guy who spoke made an obscene movement with his hips. I laughed.