Chapter 67: The Dance of Isaiah

May 26, 1985, McKinley, Ohio

On Sunday morning, I decided to walk my usual route through Doctor Blahnik's neighborhood rather than run. I had nervous energy I needed to burn off, but I didn't want to burn off ALL my energy. I put on my shorts, T-shirt, and running shoes and went out the front door. I was surprised to find Clarissa sitting on the steps, waiting for me. She hopped up, and we exchanged a hug.

"What are you doing here?" I asked.

"Waiting for you! Ready?"

"For?"

She laughed, "I'd ask for cuddles, but I know the rules."

"You don't run with me," I said. "So why come now?"

Clarissa smiled, "Because you aren't going to run! I know you well, Petrovich! You planned to walk because you're nervous, and you don't want to run because you don't want to expend too much energy today."

"Did you install some kind of mind-reading device into my head while I was sleeping?"

"It comes with the engagement ring you gave me!" she teased.

She slipped the small 'promise' ring I'd given her, which she wore on a chain, from inside her blouse so I could see it, then slipped it back inside.

"I didn't realize we'd gotten engaged!"

"You gave me a diamond ring, and we had a honeymoon!"

"But no wedding," I countered and walked down the steps.

Clarissa followed me down the walk to the sidewalk, and we turned right.

"Of all the things we could have done wrong, Petrovich, that would have taken the cake. I was wrong about being 'Petrov-sexual', and we both know it. As much as I wanted to be with you, it would never have worked. On the other hand, there is nobody besides you who could have helped me come out and allowed me to be who I really am. I love you for that, Mike. And for everything else."

"I love you, too. Last night, I promised Dale and Jocelyn that the past is in the past, and we'll move forward. Not just me and Jos, but everyone."

"I think that's good."

"You, too, Lissa."

She smiled and nodded, "Deal. So, how are you feeling?"

"You hit it right on the head when you said 'nervous'," I replied.

"How did things go with Jocelyn and Dale? Other than the pact?"

"Really well. I think everything is in place for a successful future for all of us. I'm not under any delusion that our lives will be problem-free or that everything will be smooth sailing, but all the pieces are in place. Dale has a good job with Boeing, albeit on the other side of the country; Jocelyn and Gene are basically a permanent item; you and Abby are a couple, and I think she's 'Miss Right'; Sandy, you, and I got into the same medical school, and Fran will be with us, too; my sister is happily married to a man who loves her; and I'm getting married in about eight hours."

"Where do you think the trouble will arise?"

"If I knew the answer to that question, we could avoid it! But there will be something!"

"Elizaveta told us last night that the bishop said you have to wear your cassock at all times, even in medical school and when you can at the hospital."

"He said that's what he wants, yes, but there was a very large loophole — medical or safety reasons."

"I can't imagine you trying to finesse that or play 'rules lawyer'."

I chuckled, "That was a great phrase we heard from Gene. I never realized he played Dungeons & Dragons!"

"I think he kept that quiet because the rest of us aren't really into games and because of the stigma. So how do you feel about having to wear your cassock all the time?"

I shrugged, "I don't care if anyone knows I'm clergy, though you know I'm not one to advertise under normal circumstances. It'll make me stand out, and you know my feelings about THAT. But that's actually the point, I think. We're supposed to be 'set apart', and nobody should be ashamed of being clergy. Did she tell you that Tasha's dad now wears his grey cassock under his lab coat at the pharmacy?"

"No. That's new, right?"

"Yes. The bishop changed his ruling on that for clergy who have secular jobs — so long as the cassock doesn't interfere with their jobs, then they should wear it. Before, it defaulted to not wearing it; now, the default is to wear it. I'm OK with that, but even if I wasn't, I'd follow the bishop's instructions. That's part of the deal I'm signing up for.

"That said, I wasn't expecting to be granted the ryassa. That's the more flowing black robes that you see Father Nicholas wear in public. Usually, that is only for priests or celibate deacons, but traditionally, it was for all clergy when they went out in public. It provided warmth and kept the «подрясник» (podryasnik), or inner cassock, clean so that when you put on your liturgical vestments, they weren't soiled by street grime. ("cassock")

"Basically, I'll wear the «подрясник» (podryasnik) at all times, though it'll be light blue, rather than black, and when I'm anyplace but school or the hospital, I'll wear the ryassa. There are lightweight Summer ones and heavier Winter ones, and, if it gets really cold, there are jackets called kontorasson which may be worn both under, or instead of, the ryassa. I'll have to ask about that before Winter." ("cassock")

"It's going to be weird seeing you in your cassock all the time. What about running?"

"Proper athletic attire is always permitted, and the bishop even mentioned going to the beach in Greece. Elizaveta almost lost it when he talked about that and when he made some jokes. And you know not to repeat this."

"I do. The price I pay, if you will, for you sharing everything is keeping my mouth shut! Another question — will you get one of those cool hats like the deacon from the Cathedral has?"

I shook my head, "That's very unlikely. In the Russian tradition, those are usually only awarded to protodeacons or archdeacons. Deacon Vasily doesn't wear one. I mean, it's possible I'd be given one, but that is a very rare honor. Father Herman wears one, but Father Nicholas hasn't been awarded one. And don't ask me why because that is up to the bishop!"

"So it's like a reward?"

"It's what we would call an 'ecclesiastical award'. Basically, the bishop can award medals to laymen or things like the hat or the ryassa to clergy. The Antiochians, for example, only award the pectoral cross to archpriests as an ecclesiastical award, whereas all our priests wear pectoral crosses by default. The same goes for some of the additions to the priest's vestments, such as the «набедренникъ» (nabedrennik) or «палица» (palitza). The first is a rectangular cloth worn on the right hip; the second is diamond-shaped and is also worn on the right hip. If you get both, you move the «набедренникъ» (nabedrennik) to the left side. For the Greeks, they only do the second one but call it an «ἐπιγονάτιον» (epigonotion), and it signifies the priest is permitted to hear confessions. For the Antiochians, all priests get one."

(набедренникъ» — A square or rectangular cloth worn at the right hip, suspended from a strap attached to the two upper corners of the vestment and drawn over the left shoulder")

("«палица» — a stiff diamond-shaped cloth that hangs on the right side of the body below the waist, suspended by one corner from a strap drawn over the left shoulder.")

"How the heck do you remember all of that?"

"I've been doing this for twenty-two years, Lissa! And in a sense, it's not all that different from military uniform regulations. It's all second nature at this point, just as it would be to someone serving in the military for a long time. And, by the way, if your goal was to distract me, you've done a very good job!"

"It was. If you were walking alone, what would you have thought about?"

"Seriously?" I chuckled.

Clarissa laughed, "OK, besides burying seven hard, thick inches in a tight, wet, willing virginal pussy!"

"You are SO bad!"

"Oh, please! You implied that!"

"I did," I agreed with a smirk. "Truthfully, I'd have been thinking about the gravity of what's happening today, along with the gravity of my ordination in August."

"Speaking of what's happening today, don't forget I need the balalaika. In fact, you don't have to be to church early today, so we have enough time to go get it and take it to my place so we can stash it in Abby's car."

"Sounds like a plan," I agreed.

We turned and walked back to Doctor Blahnik's house. I retrieved the balalaika, and then we headed towards the apartment Clarissa now shared with Abby.

"How is it living at Abby's?" I asked.

"Only having to share the bathroom with one person is a really nice benefit!"

"That was a really nice part of being RA, that's for sure. Feeling at home?"

"It'll take some time to totally sink in, I think, but yes, it's home."

"How did things go with your parents?"

"OK. I invited them to the lake, but they decided to go back to Sylvania."

"I take it Abby sat with Sophia, Robby, Lee, and the others at graduation?"

"She'd be the LAST person my parents would want to sit with. But I'm OK, Mike. I have Abby, you, and all our friends. As I said, if their little fiction keeps the peace, I'll accept that, but I'm not going to change."

"As if you could! Is Abby awake?"

"Yes. We had breakfast before I came to find you. I know you can't eat this morning."

We arrived at what I was now thinking of as Clarissa's place and went inside. I said 'Hi' to Abby, Clarissa put the balalaika on the bed in the second bedroom, then we left to walk back to Doctor Blahnik's house. When we arrived, Clarissa and I hugged and she headed back home while I went inside to shower and then dress for church. Jocelyn arrived with Gene to pick up Dale, as they'd decided to attend church with us. After a quick hug from Jocelyn, I left to pick up Elizaveta.

When I arrived at her house, she opened the door and gave me a quick kiss.

"Tomorrow morning, it'll be a MUCH better kiss!" she said dreamily.

"I promise to find a VERY interesting place to kiss, too!" I teased.

She closed her eyes, sighed, and shuddered, and said breathlessly, "Tonight, husband!"

"Are you ready to go?"

"Yes!"

We walked to my car, and after I helped Elizaveta into the passenger side, I walked around and got in. After buckling in, I started the car, put it in gear, and pulled away, heading down the driveway.

"How was your party?" Elizaveta asked as I pulled out of the driveway.

"Other than having to fend off Mr. Ipatyev and his friends to avoid getting drunk, I had a good time. Your grandfather, Valentin, did a good job of explaining things, which helped. I do have to confess one thing about last night."

"What?" she asked suspiciously.

"I can't dance Russian folk dances!"

Elizaveta giggled softly, "Did Protodeacon Seraphim try to teach you?"

"Yes, and I managed to fall on my butt enough times that he eventually gave up! Even with my karate lessons in the past, I don't have the coördination to do those dances!"

"Do you know the folk songs in Russian?"

"I heard most of them growing up. It was mostly the grandfathers who were singing and playing the balalaika."

"You never played?"

"My grandfather has one but never taught me, and you know my dad is Dutch," I replied.

That was true, but also deceptive, but I didn't want to give away the surprise. We rode the rest of the way to church in silence, and when we arrived, I donned my cassock, and we went inside. We each lit a candle before the icon of the Theotokos, venerated the icon of Augustine of Canterbury, who evangelized England and who was commemorated on May 26th, and then went to stand near the front on the right side of the nave to await the start of Matins. My family, Elizaveta's family, and our godparents arrived shortly after we did.

The bishop arrived a few minutes later and sat on his throne. He wasn't serving a hierarchical liturgy, though Protodeacon Seraphim and Subdeacon Alexi would serve with Father Nicholas. As Matins began, several of my friends came into the nave, and by the beginning of the Divine Liturgy, all of my closest friends were in the nave. When the services ended, Elizaveta left with her grandmothers, Tasha, and Alyssa, to go home and get ready for the wedding, while I went back to Doctor Blahnik's, where I was joined by Dale, José, Mark, Robby, and Lee for a pizza lunch.

"You guys would have been my groomsmen," I said. "But that's not something we usually do."

"The Greeks do," Robby said, "at least according to Sophia."

I nodded, "They've adopted some typically American traditions into their marriage ceremony, and there's nothing wrong with that. Their churches tend to be bigger, too, and are better suited to that kind of thing. You could do it at our cathedral, but it would be tough at Saint Michael and even tougher at Holy Transfiguration. There really isn't enough room to have a procession or attendants."

"One of the men told me you can't have Saturday weddings," José said.

"Typically, no. You shouldn't have them during a Fast, or on a fasting day, or on Saturdays. But those rules are somewhat laxly enforced to accommodate American society. I can't imagine the bishop approving a wedding during Great Lent except in extremis, but otherwise, he's generally accommodating."

"And it always has to be in the church?" Lee asked.

"Always. I've never heard of «ekonomia» being granted for a marriage to be held anywhere else. If a married couple converts to Orthodoxy, quite often, the bishop will strongly suggest they have a crowning service, which is what you'll see today. That would be done for anyone who had a civil marriage for some reason. There was a Marine from Holy Transfiguration who married while stationed overseas. There was no Orthodox chaplain, nor was there a church close to the base, so when he came back home, he and his wife had a crowning ceremony."

"If there's a church with more complicated rules, procedures, and ceremonies than the Orthodox Church, I have no idea what it might be!" Dale said. "I've known Mike since second grade, and I still shake my head when he explains stuff."

"Do you go to church?" Mark asked.

Dale shook his head, "Not since I was little, really. I've been to Mike's church, well, both churches, and to Jocelyn's Lutheran Church, but that's about it since grade school."

"What time is your flight, Dale?" I asked.

"Last one out of Port Columbus — 10:20pm. I just have my carry-on, so I can stay until about 8:30pm, which is after dinner, the cake, and some dancing."

"Don't worry about leaving then," José said with a smirk. "Dona got the idea that Elizaveta doesn't plan to stay at the reception one minute longer than necessary. It seems she's VERY determined to start her wedding night as early as possible!"

The guys all laughed, and I joined them. That was exactly what Elizaveta had told me, and I wondered just how long we'd be at the reception. One thing was certain, and that was no matter how determined she was to begin our wedding night, we couldn't leave the reception before the bishop did.

"Mike, which girl was Mikayla?" Dale asked.

"She was standing on the left side of the nave and wearing a red blouse and grey skirt and had her long, black hair pulled back in a ponytail."

"Not to be impolite, but..."

I laughed, "Yes. Very nice 'mammalian protuberances'."

Dale laughed, "Did your mom ever find out you have those albums?"

"She knew I had the Carlin tapes, but I don't think she knew I had those Zappa albums. I kept them in my closet on the shelf, not next to the stereo, and I don't believe she was a 'snooper'."

"What albums?" Mark asked.

"Joe's Garage," José answered. "It's a two-album set by Frank Zappa, who is pretty irreverent and generally not appropriate for mixed company."

"What's that Russian word, Mike?" Dale asked.

"«Некультурный» (nekulturny)!" I chuckled. "It means rude, uncultured, or uncouth."

"Which is probably too mild to describe Zappa!" José replied. "He and George Carlin are both like that."

"Mike mentioned he had those George Carlin tapes, and he also had Steve Martin's album, the one where he talks about his cat!"

"Doesn't Mike call Elizaveta 'Kitten'?" Mark asked.

Dale laughed hard, "And that 'cat' will absolutely be the best fuck he's ever had!"

Robby, Lee, José, and I all laughed hard.

"I think I missed a few things going to a conservative Bible church," Mark said.

"Those albums aren't exactly approved by the Orthodox Church," I replied. "But they are classic American humor. If you want, I'll lend them to you, though I strongly suggest you listen to them in private. Alyssa might be offended, so I wouldn't listen to them with her until you listen first, and maybe not even then. I can lend you either tapes or LPs."

"They're pretty raw," Robby cautioned. "Be sure you want to listen to them."

"He's right," Lee confirmed, "but I think you should."

When we finished our pizza, I went upstairs, trimmed my beard, took a shower, and then dressed in my black suit with a white shirt and a royal blue tie, which Elizaveta had selected. I put on a black belt and then my black wingtips. I double-checked myself in the mirror, then headed downstairs to where the guys were waiting. Dale had changed into his suit, while the others elected to wear the dress shirts and ties they'd worn to church earlier.

I gave Dale my keys, and the six of us left the house, with Mark riding with Dale and me and the other guys getting into Robby's car. Fifteen minutes later, Dale parked in the church parking lot, and once everyone was out of their cars, we headed into the building. We were greeted by Mr. Sokolov, who led us to the parish office. Elizaveta would wait in the small meeting room next door.

Dale poured me a glass of water from a pitcher on the table and handed it to me.

"Last chance to bail," he teased.

"She'd hunt him down and kill him," José laughed. "It would be a very short reprieve!"

"Him?" Robby laughed. "She'll kill Dale simply for suggesting it!"

"She's a pussy cat," I replied with a grin.

"Oh, right," Robby laughed. "I forgot that Russian girls are so meek and mild! You know, just like Greek girls!"

There was a knock at the door, and when it opened, Subdeacon Alexi stuck his head in.

"Vladyka would like to pray with you before the crowning," he said.

"We'll leave," José said.

"Vladyka said that you're welcome to stay."

"Mike?"

I nodded, and the guys stayed. A minute later, Vladyka ARKADY came into the church office. I asked for his blessing, and Mark followed suit.

"Good afternoon to all of you," Vladyka said. "We're going to pray a litany and then the first prayer from the betrothal service. If you wish, respond along with Subdeacon Michael and Mark with 'Lord, have mercy!' to each petition."

Vladyka said the prayers, and the six of us replied to each petition in unison and said 'Amen' at the conclusion of the prayer.

"I'm going to pray with Elizaveta now," he said. "I'll see you at the doors to the nave at 2:00pm sharp."

He blessed us, then left, with Subdeacon Alexi closing the door behind him. I sat down on the couch and did my best to relax, but as I'd predicted, my nerves were reminding me of just how momentous this day was. About ten minutes later, Mr. Sokolov came into the office with a lit candle. I got up, and he handed it to me, then all of us left the office and went to the narthex. Elizaveta came out of the meeting room wearing her beautiful white dress, her hair tied back with a royal blue ribbon which matched my tie, and carrying a taper. She was followed by Tasha, Alyssa, Mrs. Sokolov, her grandmothers, Oksana, and Serafima.

Elizaveta and I moved to the doors of the nave where Vladyka ARKADY was waiting with Father Nicholas, Father Herman, Protodeacon Seraphim, Deacon Vasily, and Subdeacon Alexi. Elizaveta stood just to my left, and our godparents took their positions behind us. Protodeacon Seraphim handed the censer to the bishop, who held it high. I took a couple of deep breaths and slowly let them out, willing myself to relax, which, thankfully, I did, at least somewhat, just as the service began.

"Glory to Thee, our God; glory to Thee!" the bishop sang out, with the choir responding with the same refrain.

The bishop led us forward, towards the table which had been prepared in front of the solea, singing Psalm 127 with the refrain 'Glory to Thee, our God; glory to Thee!' following each verse. When the Psalm was finished, the bishop turned to face the assembled congregation.

"Brothers and sisters in Christ, we come today to join Michael and Elizaveta in the bonds of holy matrimony. This is no small undertaking, and while it is Michael and Elizaveta who are joined, it is the entire congregation who is bound by vows to assist them in their marriage in every way, to aid them in establishing a faithful, healthy, happy home which one day shall be filled with faithful Orthodox children. You must pray for them each day that they live their lives in accordance with God's will and that no scandal or reproach is brought upon them.

"Now, as Elizaveta is not yet eighteen, I must, according to the State of Ohio, confirm her parents' blessing on this union. Viktor Nikolay'ich, do you give your blessing that Elizaveta should be wed to Michael?"

"Yes, Vladyka," Viktor replied emphatically.

"And Yulia Valentinovna, do you give your blessing that Elizaveta should be wed to Michael?"

"Yes, Vladyka," Yulia replied firmly.

He nodded, then handed the censer to Protodeacon Seraphim.

"Do you, Michael, have a good, free, and unconstrained will and a firm intention to take as your wife this woman, Elizaveta, whom you see here before you?"

"I have, Vladyka," I replied.

"Have you promised yourself to any other bride?"

"No, Vladyka, I have not promised myself to any other."

"Do you, Elizaveta, have a good, free, and unconstrained will and a firm intention to take as your husband this man, Michael, whom you see here before you?"

"I have, Vladyka," she replied with a huge smile.

"Have you promised yourself to any other man?"

"No, Vladyka, I have not promised myself to any other."