Chapter 23: A Year of Death

2024

I was meeting with the staff at the academy in Forsyth when I got the call. It was Wednesday, January 17. We were talking about scheduling lectures on PTSD, mental illness, and use of force, and developing dates for the next few months. I had my phone on vibrate out of courtesy; my business line routed to my cell phone, and I didn’t want to be taking a call from one client while talking to another. The phone was in my shirt pocket and began vibrating. I ignored it and kept working, but it kept vibrating. Then it gave a different vibration, the type from getting a text message. I pulled my phone out with the intention of turning it off, but I glanced at the screen.

911 call me asap

The call came from Kelly’s phone, as did the missed phone calls and a voicemail. I looked at the others and said, “Excuse me, but I need to take this.” I stood and stepped into the hallway. I hit the Call Back button.

“Grim! Thank God!”

“Kelly, what’s wrong? I’m in a meeting.”

“Grim, it’s your grandfather ... he’s, he’s ... Grim, your grandfather died.” I could hear the tears in her voice.

My mind blanked. Grandpa dead? That was impossible! The man was larger than life to me. “Wha ... what...”

“Grim, your mother just called. You need to come home.”

“How?”

Kelly was still crying. “Come home, Grim. I don’t know all the details, but he died in his sleep. Come home, hun.”

“Yeah, I’m coming home.”

I ended the call and stood there for a moment before sitting on a bench in the hall. That was where Bill Geary found me, just staring at the wall and not seeing it, but seeing my grandfather. Bill was with the State Police, on the training staff and had left the meeting to come out and find me.

“Grim, what’s up? You coming in? Grim?” he asked and reached out to touch my shoulder. That brought me around. I looked up at him and he saw the tears in my eyes. “Grim, what’s wrong?”

“Uhhh ... that was my wife. My grandfather died.”

“Oh, shit. Sorry, Grim.”

“I need to go home,” I said, but I just kept staring at the wall.

“I’m sorry, Grim. You okay to drive?” he asked, but I just couldn’t answer. After a few seconds I sensed Bill moving away.

Half a minute later the rest of the people in the room came into the hallway. Everybody was expressing their regrets, but some of them thought it was my father. I stood and said, “Thanks. It’s my grandfather, my father’s father. Jesus, he must be a fucking basket case.”

“You going to be okay to drive, Grim?” asked Bill.

I dug out my handkerchief and wiped my eyes. “Yeah. Give me a minute. I need to get my briefcase.” I headed back into the meeting room and cleaned up my paperwork and schedules.

Jim Bellantoni followed me in. He was also with the Staties, and he asked, “Are you going to be able to drive? Do you need a lift home?”

I took a deep breath. “No, I should be good. Thanks, but I don’t think that’s necessary.”

“You sure? I can get a couple of guys to drive you and your car home. It’s no big deal.”

“Thanks, but I’ll be fine. It was just the shock, you know.”

“You were close, I guess.” I simply nodded. “Any idea how he died?”

“Kelly said he died in his sleep, though I would have expected to have heard about it before I left home this morning. Natural causes, I guess. He must have been in his eighties. He was in the early days of Vietnam. That’d put him in his eighties, right?” How old was he? Whenever I asked, he’d always joke he was ‘twenty-nine and holding’ and if I asked what he was holding, he’d tell me ‘holding on for dear life!’

“I guess.”

Jim followed me out to the hallway and he and Bill walked me to my car. We’d have to reschedule the meeting and I promised to call them when I could. I threw my briefcase in my back seat and started home. Somehow it just didn’t seem real.

Thank God traffic was light. It was midday so I didn’t have to fight the rush hour heading west. I probably shouldn’t have been driving, but I got home in a couple of hours. Kelly’s cars were in the driveway so she must have been home. I let myself in and she came over and wrapped herself around me. “I’m so sorry, Grim.”

I saw the kids in the living room, so she must have gone over to their schools to bring them home. Talk about a mixed blessing; you got out of school because somebody died. They both looked serious, and I could see Riley had been crying. They were unusual in that they knew their great-grandparents and saw them frequently. Riley had been alive when my mother’s parents had been alive, but they both died when she was a baby, and she had no memory of them. Seamus was born after they died so the only great-grandparents he knew were Dad’s folks. Riley came over and hugged me as well, followed by Seamus, who gave me an awkward hug. He was not quite ten and hugging wasn’t cool for a guy.

“Thank you, guys,” I told them.

“I’m sorry, Dad,” said my daughter.

I leaned down and kissed her forehead. “Thanks, sweetheart. Now, give me a chance to talk to your mother.” They headed down the hall to their rooms, leaving me with Kelly in the living room. I sat down on the couch and Kelly settled next to me and took my hand. “What happened?” I asked.

“I talked to your mom. She said she talked to your grandmother. Your grandfather got up normally and ate breakfast, and then sat down in his recliner for a nap. She came in an hour later and he was just gone. He simply stopped breathing.”

“Huh.”

“Grim, how old was your grandfather? He had to be up there, didn’t he?”

That stumped me a bit. I was thirty-eight, at least for a few more weeks. My parents got married right out of college and I came along less than a year later, and they were sixty-one. What about Grandpa? He served in the early days of Vietnam, back when Special Forces was a new idea. When was that? ‘60? ‘61? ‘62? When was he born, the early Forties? Couldn’t have been any later than that. The numbers wouldn’t work for me to be born in 1985. That would put him in his eighties. “Not sure, babe. He had to be in his early eighties. We’ll find out, I guess.” I shook my head. “How’s Dad taking it?”

She shrugged. “About like you. Your grandfather was just one of those guys you don’t forget.”

“What’s the plan?”

“Your mom is going to call. We’re probably meeting at your grandparents’ tonight. You’ve got time to unpack and change.”

“Yeah.” I stood and went back out to my car. I had packed my bags for a trip down to Sullivan County after leaving Forsyth. I pulled out my phone and called Dom Ballantine and explained that I had to cancel our meetings. He understood and promised to call the others. I’d need to reschedule, which would probably move things back to next week.

When I got back inside Kelly was on the phone. “Hold on ... he just came inside.” She handed me the phone and said, “It’s your mom.”

I took the phone. “Hi, Mom.”

“Oh, Grim, this is just terrible.”

“How’s Dad?”

“Oh, Grim, he’s not good. Your grandfather was so close to him and Dave.”

“Well, tell him we’re sorry. Did you call Jack and Bobbie Joe?” I asked.

“I called them after I called Kelly. They’re both flying in tomorrow. We’re going over to the house tonight.”

“We’ll come over, too.”

Mom said, “That would be good. Do me a favor. Order up a sub platter or something. I don’t think anybody is going to want to make dinner.”

“We’ll take care of it. See you in a bit.” I hung up and put the phone back in the holder. Kelly was looking at me and I said, “We need to order up some subs or something.”

“I’ll call Valentino’s. We can pick it up on the way over. You go unpack and take a shower. Tonight’s just us so we don’t need to dress up,” she replied.

“Yeah.” I headed down the hall with my bag and tossed it on the bed. I unpacked and went into the shower. When I came out, Kelly was sitting on the bed. “Whenever you get dressed, we can head over. I’ve got a sub platter and some wings ordered from Valentino’s. We’ll pick it up on the way over.”

“Okay.” I went to the dresser and pulled out some briefs.

“Just okay?”

I pulled my underwear on and went over to Kelly. “Sorry if I seem short. I appreciate it.”

She hugged me. “I understand. It’s okay.”

“I just don’t know what to say.”

“Like I said, it’s okay.” She stood and headed for the door. “Get dressed. I’ll get the kids ready.”

It was a quiet drive over to West Springs. We stopped at Valentino’s for five minutes to pick up the subs and wings, then fifteen minutes later we were in the driveway of my grandparents’ house. I guess it was my grandmother’s house now.

I had the kids carry the food into the house, and for once they didn’t give us any grief. I guess they realized that this wasn’t the time for it. Inside were my grandmother, my parents, Aunt Laurie and Uncle Dave, and a man in a black suit I had never met before. Grandma came to me, and I hugged her tightly, then hugged all the others. Well, not the stranger. He looked very solemn. Mom introduced him. “Grim, this is Mister Solomon. He’s from Holliman.”

“Ah.” I turned to the new guy and shook his hand. Holliman Memorial Home was a large funeral home in West Springs. They had obviously chosen them for the services. “Pleased to meet you.”

“I’m sorry for your loss, Mister Reaper. I knew your grandfather. He was a good man.”

“Yes, he was. Please, join us. We brought over dinner.” Kelly and Mom sorted out the food, putting it on an island in the kitchen and taking out the plates and silverware. Dad and Uncle Dave were making drinks.

Seamus and Riley were stashed in front of the television while the rest of us sat around the dining room table eating. “So, what’s the plan?” I asked. “Do we have a schedule yet or is that still up in the air.”

Solomon took over at that point. He had a notepad with some notes on it, and answered, “Yes, we have made some decisions. “Today is Wednesday. Your grandmother has requested we keep things simple, with just one night for the viewing. We can have your grandfather prepared for Friday, and the service and interment on Saturday. They have a site already selected at Shady Glen.”

I nodded in understanding. Shady Glen was a cemetery in West Springs. That gave them all day tomorrow to get the body from the hospital, if they hadn’t already done so, and ‘prepare’ him. Preparation would be his embalming, dressing, and loading into the casket. God, I hated how impersonal this all could be.

“I’d like to take some photos, if possible, if not tonight then tomorrow morning. We can prepare some displays and a video remembrance of him to play during the viewing. John was very popular and well known; we are expecting a large turnout to pay their respects,” he continued.

That was true. Grandpa knew everybody of importance in the county, and more than a few from outside the county. It wouldn’t surprise me to see people coming from Atlanta.

Solomon looked at me and said, “Your grandmother was wondering what your feelings were to have a military honor guard present. I understand you were also in the Army.” My eyes opened at that. I glanced at Grandma and saw her looking back curiously. It was true, too. As a veteran he had the right to military honors, including a flag on his coffin and Taps being played. Solomon took my hesitation as confusion because he continued, “We can make the arrangements. There is a system already in place, but it’s probably not as impressive as they show on television. These days it’s usually just a corporal with a flag and a DVD recording of Taps.”

Everybody was looking at me at that point. I looked at my grandmother and asked, “Would you like that, Grandma?”

She nodded. “He was so proud of you when you went into the service, and afterwards, when you came home and talked to him, he finally opened up about his time in the Army. He was proud and ashamed at the same time, if you can understand that.”

“I understand, Grandma.” I turned to Solomon. “We’ll be requesting the military service, but a corporal is simply not going to cut it. We’ll be expecting the full service. Bugles, rifle salute, flag, everything.”

He looked apologetic. “Mister Reaper, that might not be realistic. There have been cutbacks, and there are so many Vietnam veterans, well, you understand.”

“Perhaps so, but that’s what we’ll be expecting.” I pulled out my wallet and extracted the special military ID card I had. All Medal of Honor recipients get a special identification card so they can access the benefits they are entitled to. Most of those are for things like privileges at the PX or for military travel, none of which I had ever used. However, as an MOH recipient, I was entitled to full military honors at my funeral, including pallbearers, a flag, a bugler, and volley rifle fire. I handed Solomon my identification card. “Here’s the deal. I’ll trade my fancy funeral for his.”

My mother gasped at that. “Grim!”

“Mom, when the time comes for my funeral, none of you will be around, and I certainly won’t care.” I turned to Solomon. “If that doesn’t do the trick, let me know who I have to talk to.”

“You received the Medal of Honor?” he asked.

I went into my grandfather’s study and returned with a couple of pictures I knew he had. The first was of me receiving the Medal from President Obama, and the second was of the President standing with me and Grandpa.

“Sir, it’s an honor. I served in the Navy on the Stennis. Thank you.” Solomon was a mousy looking guy, but there was some strength in his grip when he shook my hand. “Not to be indelicate, but did your grandfather have a DD-214 available?”

“What’s that?” asked Grandma.

“Something that says he received an Honorable Discharge,” he explained.

“I don’t know. I know he dealt with the VA on occasion. Would they have it?” she said.

“Let me look into it. I can probably figure something out tomorrow. Don’t worry about it. I’ll sort something out.”

We helped him collect some photos from picture frames and scrapbooks and he took them with a promise to return them after the funeral. Then we talked some more and took off. Mom and Dad decided to stay with Grandma for the night.

When we got home, Kelly asked, “Can you really trade your funeral like that?”

I gave her a sad smile. “Probably not, but it’s worth a try. It’s disgusting that they are cutting back on military honors like that. It can’t be that expensive. What happens when it really is my turn to go? I get a kazoo band and a red, white, and blue piñata?” She gave me a sad smile but didn’t argue.

Bobbie Joe and his family flew down from Philadelphia, which was just a bit over two hours flying time. At least they were in the same time zone. We put them up in the apartment at our grandparents’ house. Jack and his crew were flying in from San Francisco, which was almost five hours, and they picked up three time zones; we wouldn’t see them until late afternoon.

Bobbie Joe, Joanne, and their boys left Philly a little before ten and landed in Atlanta a little after noon. They got to Matucket around one-thirty and immediately went to the farmhouse. After saying hello to Grandma, they moved into the apartment and then went back down to see Grandma. Our grandmother was just puttering around the place trying to decide what to do, and not coming up with any answers. I tried to imagine life without Kelly, and I didn’t have any answers either.

The world turned impossibly horrid at four-seventeen. A minivan pulled into the driveway, and I noticed Teresa was driving. That seemed unusual, but what was really unusual was when Diego came in and said, “Mom needs some help, Tio Grim.” Then he went back outside.