Chapter 29: Girl Trouble

July 7, 2000, Chicago, Illinois

“Do you have everything packed for tomorrow?” Mom One asked.

“Yes. I have my clothes packed, and I’ll put my toothbrush and stuff in after breakfast tomorrow. My bag for my laptop has all the stuff I need, but I’m keeping it out until I write in my journal tonight. When will Larry and Drew arrive?”

“After you leave. They’re driving up from Cincinnati tomorrow, and then we’re heading to Lake Geneva for a few days. They’ll go home before you get back, too.”

“OK. Don’t forget I’m going to see Larisa the day after we come back from Michigan.”

“I remember. It’s on the calendar! I need a hug because it’s time to head to work!”

“Melissa is such a slave driver,” I teased.

Mom One laughed, “You know that’s not true! What are you doing today?”

“Kelly, Robby, Joe, Cynthia, Sally, and Missy are coming over. Winter knows to expect us for lunch.”

“Do you have plans for tonight?”

“Not yet. We might do something, but we’re not sure. Do you want me to call you and Mom Two?”

“Please.”

“OK. If we decide to go out, I’ll call.”

“Thanks. Hugs?”

I smirked, rolled my eyes, and sighed deeply, “I suppose.”

“You’re a turkey!” Mom One exclaimed.

I hugged her, she grabbed her bag, and left the house. I had a couple of hours before my friends would arrive, so I went to the house to hang out with Albert, Matthew, Michael, and Chelsea. My sisters were going to the park with their friends, so they wouldn’t bother us.

“Albert, can you show me your new program?” I asked.

“Yes! It’s SO cool! Dad and I figured some stuff out, and I called Aimee when I got up to ask questions.”

We spent nearly the full two hours playing, with Albert showing me how to do stuff. We crashed EVERY time we tried to land, but it was fun. I preferred strategy games like my dad did, but I knew this was important to Albert because he wanted to learn to fly. I did like flying from Meigs Field in Chicago, though the terrain detail wasn’t good enough to actually see our house. I wondered if someday they might be able to do that.

I had to stop playing when my friends arrived, and we went to the basement to play pool and hang out until lunch. At lunch we discussed what to do for the afternoon and evening.

“I can’t go out,” Kelly said. “It’s my grandma’s birthday and we’re going to River Grove to see her.”

“I checked the movie listing in the paper,” Robby said. “There isn’t anything playing I want to see except The Patriot and I need my dad to take me to see that because it’s ‘R’.”

“How much sex is in a movie about the American Revolution?” Joe asked.

“It said it was for ‘strong war violence’,” Robby said.

“I can see ‘PG-13’,” I said. “but it’s dumb we can’t go see a good movie because somebody thinks it’s too violent! It’s not like it’s a ‘slasher’ movie or something! It’s history!”

“That’s what my dad said when I asked,” Robby replied. “He didn’t object to me wanting to see it. I’m sure your dad would be cool taking you.”

“He would. Are you going to see it?”

“Tomorrow night.”

“Let me know if it’s good. I’ll ask my dad or Tom to take me.”

“Why Tom?” Joe asked.

“Dad is going to be gone a lot, and so am I, so it will depend on how it works out.”

“You’re going to see your Russian general friend, right?” Robby asked.

“When I get back from our family vacation in Iron Mountain. I’ll be there for a few days.”

“You went to Russia when it was still communist, right?” Cynthia asked.

“I was really little when I went to General Dmitri’s wedding to Tanya.”

“How did you get to know them?”

I laughed, “Dad dated Tanya when they were teenagers.”

“Is there ANY adult girl you know who your dad didn’t date?” Sally asked.

“Mom One’s boss Melissa, Doctor Gina, Doctor Al’s wife Belinda, and some others.”

“The fact that you can name them is just crazy,” Kelly said. “I don’t get how your Aunt Kara and Aunt Jessica put up with that!”

“They don’t,” I replied. “They don’t ‘put up’ with it, it’s simply how they all choose to live their lives. Dad likes girls, a lot, and my aunts are OK with him having lots of girlfriends.”

“I see that look, Joe!” Sally exclaimed. “We talked about that! If you want ANYTHING from me, you’ll get that dumb idea out of your head RIGHT NOW!”

Joe answered her very carefully, “I understand.”

“Somebody is possessive!” Cynthia teased.

“Why would I want to share my boyfriend with anyone? No way! Would YOU share your boyfriend?”

“No, but I’m not ready to have a steady boyfriend, either. So the guys can do what they want.”

“And that’s OK?” Kelly asked.

“If they do something I don’t like I just won’t do anything with them. Honestly, it’s no big deal if they kiss someone else because I do the same thing. You and Joe are a couple, so the rules are different. It was like with Jesse and Francesca - he would never have done anything with another girl. But they aren’t a couple now, so he’s free to do what he wants. Well, unless Kelly is claiming him!”

“We’re, uhm, not a couple,” Kelly said.

“Then he’s fair game!” Cynthia declared with a silly smile. “And I still think you’re just a bit too possessive, Sally.”

“How? Either he’s my boyfriend or he isn’t. If he is, then he’s mine and that means you and everyone else have to keep your paws off him!”

“Chill!” Cynthia declared.

“Don’t you think cheating is wrong?” Kelly asked.

“Duh! But Sally is acting like every other girl on the planet wants Joe! Sally, is it OK for Joe to talk to another girl when you aren’t around?”

“I guess.”

“And to have a female friend?”

“I’m not sure. I guess it depends.”

“I have lots of female friends,” I said. “And that never bothered Francesca because she trusted me.”

Of course there was the issue of April, but Francesca hadn’t been upset when she found out I’d done it with another girl. That said, I knew once I started having sex with Francesca, that other girls were off limits. And I thought that was the right thing to do.

“It was her mom who was the total bitch!” Cynthia said. “It’s like Heather’s mom. All she and Paul ever did was kiss, and there is no way she was going to give him a blowjob!”

“Ewww!!!” Sally and Kelly both squealed.

“Oh, please!” Cynthia exclaimed. “Grow up!”

“But it’s so gross!” Sally protested. “Would YOU do that?”

“Do you French kiss?”

“Uhm, no,” she stammered, “that’s kind of gross, too.”

I felt the conversation was getting into an area that neither Sally nor Kelly were really ready to handle.

“I think we should change the subject,” I said quickly. “Where is everyone going on vacation?”

That subject set aside, we talked about everyone’s vacation plans while we ate, then decided to watch The Princess Bride on our DVD player. I was glad it had finally come out on DVD because we were wearing out the VHS tapes we had because everyone in the family loved the movie, as did all of our friends.

“What are those red envelopes by the TV?” Joe asked when the movie ended.

“They’re from Netflix,” I replied. “You can go on the internet and select movies and they send discs to you, you watch them, and send them back. It’s totally cool because you can get three at a time and take as long as you want to watch them.”

“What if you don’t send them back? I mean, couldn’t you just keep them?”

“They charge you if you don’t send them back, and I think they’d cancel your membership if you did that too often. It’s like not returning videos to the video store. But this is awesome because I can just go on my dad’s account and add movies I want to see. He arranges it so everyone gets a chance to pick movies. It works better during the summer because we can watch our movies during the day and send them back right away to get new ones, and he can watch his at night or on the weekends.”

“That’s totally cool. I wish my parents would get a DVD player, but they say we have too many movies on VHS.”

“We have both,” I said. “Dad is only buying new stuff on DVDs. He thinks at some point you’ll be able to watch movies over the internet, but right now it’s not fast enough.”

“Like any movie?” Robby asked.

“Yeah, and at any time. You know, you can’t sleep, it’s 2:00am, and you’re bored so you can watch something you don’t even own. Dad thinks that’s what Netflix is going to do.”

“Why?”

“He said calling it ‘Netflix’ implies movies on the net, not just using the internet to order them.”

“How much does it cost?”

“I think it’s about $15 a month,” I said. “It’s like $1.00 per disc if you do the math for how many movies we get. That’s better than the video store and the movies just show up in Dad’s mailbox!”

“What should we watch next?” Cynthia asked.

“I need to leave soon,” Kelly said. “So it doesn’t matter to me.”

“Could we watch Pulp Fiction?” Joe asked.

“I’m not watching that movie!” Sally declared. “I heard it’s totally disgusting!”

Given Sally thought French kissing was gross, I wasn’t surprised she’d think Pulp Fiction was disgusting. I loved the movie, along with the other Quentin Tarantino movies Dad had - Jackie Brown and Reservoir Dogs.

“Dad says I have to be careful about watching R-rated movies with my friends,” I said, “because he doesn’t want parents to complain. Tarantino is pretty intense.”

“I don’t mind,” Cynthia said. “I’m sure not going to tell my parents! They don’t need to know every little thing I do! But if Sally is going to leave, we should watch something else.”

“I agree,” Robby said.

We debated what to watch for ten minutes and ultimately decided to just listen to music. When Kelly had to go I walked her to the door, we hugged, and she said she’d see me in three weeks because she’d be gone when I got back from DC. Around 4:00pm, Sally and Joe decided to go home, so we decided to call it an afternoon. We all left the house through the back door and my friends all said ‘goodbye’. I went into the coach house and got a drink and was about to go upstairs when someone knocked at the back door. I went to answer it.

“Hi,” Cynthia said.

“Hi,” I said. “What’s up?”

“I thought maybe we could hang out a bit. Nobody’s home at my house and Joe and Sally are going to her house.”

“Sure. We can hang out here or go back and do something in my dad’s house.”

“I’ll kick your butt at Super Smash Bros.!” she declared.

I laughed, “Riiiiggghhhhttt!”

“Afraid you’ll lose to a girl?”

“Girl or boy, Human, Vulcan, or Klingon doesn’t matter! You know I don’t care about stuff like that. Nicole was the best skater and scorer on our team, and I didn’t care that she had to pee sitting down!”

Cynthia laughed, “Changing boy baby diapers is WAY more challenging than changing girl baby diapers! Are we playing?”

“Sure. Just be prepared to be disappointed!”

“Is that what you told Francesca?” Cynthia giggled.

“Hey!” I protested. “Why insult me?”

“I was teasing! Are we going to play?”

“Sure.”

We went to the living room and I turned on the TV and the Nintendo and put in the cartridge. I handed Cynthia a controller and went into multiplayer.

“We select characters, then switch characters,” she said. “That way we each play the same characters. We keep score until we’re done, but at least three rounds.”

“So six games?” I asked.

“Yes.”

“Bring it!” I grinned.

We started out with Mario and Luigi and I quickly discovered Cynthia was GOOD at the game.

“Do you have a Nintendo at home?” I asked.

“A 64,” she replied. “And I play this ALL the time! Worried?”

“No!” I declared, but I actually was a bit worried because I was struggling to stay ahead.

I barely won the first match and we switched players so that I had Luigi and she had Mario and we started again.

“What do you think about Sally and Joe?” Cynthia asked as the game started.

“I don’t,” I chuckled.

“She’s seriously uptight and he’s seriously horny,” Cynthia said.

I realized she was trying to distract me so I had to be careful to pay attention to the game, but not seem like I was trying to ignore her.

“I think that covers just about every relationship at school!” I replied. “Guys want to but girls mostly don’t.”

“True. But you and Francesca...”

“I can’t say anything about that,” I replied firmly.

“I can put two and two together, you dope! You aren’t a virgin, right?”

“I never said that.”

“But it’s true, isn’t it?”

“Yes,” I allowed.

“Then it’s obvious even if you won’t admit it. It’s why Francesca’s mom moved right in the middle of the school year. She freaked out just like Heather’s mom, only all Heather did was kiss Paul. She agreed with Sally and Kelly about blowjobs!”

Maybe two could play the same game I thought.

“But you like to do that?” I teased. “And you’ve done it? A lot?”

“No!” she exclaimed. “I mean, wait!”

She had lost her concentration for just a split second which was all I needed to get an advantage which would let me win the round, which I did a minute later.

“That was a dirty trick!” Cynthia declared.

“You started it!” I grinned. “So, you were saying?”

“I don’t think it’s gross, but I haven’t done it.”

“Next round?” I asked.

We started again, with Cynthia selecting Pikachu and me taking Donkey Kong. I was SO tempted to use Paul’s line when Cynthia got enough of an advantage that it was clear she would win, but I decided that would cross a line I shouldn’t cross.

“Hah!” she declared when she won.

“It’s still 2-1,” I replied. “Let’s keep going.”

The fourth match was super close, but I managed to win, making it 3-1.

“Take a break for a drink?” I asked.

“Sure.”

We went to the kitchen and I poured a glass of lemonade for each of us.

“When you were winning, I thought about saying something to mess you up,” I said.

“What Paul said, right?” she asked with a smirk.

“Yeah, but I realized just how much trouble that could cause.”

“Because I got angry or because I said I would?” she asked with a silly smile.

I laughed, “Which would have messed ME up, not you!”

“You know I’m not touchy about stuff like that the way Sally is, or Kelly, I guess. My dad would freak out, but he’s as uptight as they are about sex! Your moms are totally cool, right?”

“Yes. And my dad, too.”

“Lots of girls seem to think so.”

I shrugged, “Dad lives his life the way he wants to.”

“You don’t agree?”

“I think my moms have it right - two people together for life.”

“But before then?”

“You date to find the person you want to be with.”

“And you thought it would be Francesca, didn’t you?”

“Yes. And who knows, maybe when we’re both eighteen we can get together, but until then?”

“Have you thought about sneaking to see her?”

“Yeah, but her mom could call the cops if I did that. She told my dad I wasn’t allowed to see Francesca.”

“What a bitch! So what are you going to do? Date?”

“I’m not sure. Kelly and I hang out, and she’s nice, but I’m not sure.”

“How old is your Russian friend?”

“She’ll be twelve in September.”

“Do you like her?”

“Sure, but not that way. She’s still a kid.”

“We’re fourteen!” Cynthia protested.

“You look like a girl, if you know what I mean!”

“You mean I have at least the start of a figure?”

“Yes. And it’s more than a start!”

“That’s nice of you to say, but they’re still tiny!”

“But you’ve gone through puberty, which is kind of the minimum. And size isn’t the issue.”

Cynthia laughed, “Right, which is why the guys drool over Ellie!”

“If you can see them or touch them, you have NO right to complain!” I teased.

“Smart boy! Ready to get your butt kicked?”

We sat our empty glasses on the counter.

“You’re down 3-1,” I replied. “How much more punishment do you need?”

“Let’s go!”

We went back to the living room and selected characters and started playing again.

“When you get back from vacation, would you want to hang out sometimes?” Cynthia asked.

“Sure. Playing Nintendo?”

“Or whatever. I think we like a lot of the same stuff and I’m not uptight like the other girls.”

“No, you aren’t. Are you talking about just like we’re doing now, or going on a date?”

“If you ask, I’ll say ‘yes’.”

“To anything?” I teased.

“You’ll have to ask to find out!” she teased back.

“You like to live dangerously?” I asked.

“I know how to say ‘no’ if you ask me something I don’t want to do!”

I remembered Mom One telling me about playing chess with Dad and wondered if ‘Strip Nintendo’ would work! I laughed silently at the silly idea, which I was sure was something Dad would have done if he’d had a chance. Of course, Mom One was really to blame because she’d invented the game to put players from the other team off their game.