Chapter 11: The Truth Will Set You Free

April 22, 2000, Chicago, Illinois

“How can they do that?!” Maria Cristina demanded, completely outraged.

“The same way they could murder the Branch Davidians,” I replied. “After burning 76 people to death, including women and children, I’d say kidnapping a child at gunpoint and forcing him to return to a totalitarian country is nothing.”

“That woman is pure evil,” Elyse said.

“I don’t call her ‘Janet Sterno’ for nothing,” I said.

“America should really reconsider its policy towards Cuba,” Eduardo said. “Spain is a bit more enlightened, as is Cuba.”

“I don’t disagree,” I replied. “Remove all the sanctions and let money flow into the Island and the Castro boys are done for. But forcing a kid to leave the US and return to a dictatorship? If the US stands for ANYTHING, something like that should never, ever happen. Ever. And if you want to know my theory for why it happened, it’s because the anti-Castro Cubans are all Republicans. If they were Democrats, this wouldn’t have happened.”

“Seriously?” Eduardo asked.

“Yes, of course!” Maria Cristina declared. “None of my friends or family would even consider voting for a Democrat! But I disagree with Steve - I think the sanctions should be tougher, and I wouldn’t object to someone removing Castro from power forcibly.”

“And you guys thought I was anti-totalitarian,” I chuckled. “Of course, I can also tell you who is responsible for the Oklahoma City bombing.”

“We know who,” Eduardo said. “Timothy McVeigh and Terry Nichols.”

“Yes, they built and exploded the bomb, but Janet Sterno is completely responsible. Without Waco, there is no Oklahoma City bombing.”

“Oh come on!” he protested.

“We don’t always foresee the chain of events, but we have to take responsibility for them when they occur. We can talk about provocative actions by FDR causing Pearl Harbor, if you want.”

“He’s messing with you, Eduardo,” Elyse smirked.

I chuckled, “I am, to a point. I do believe that Waco led directly to Oklahoma City, but McVeigh and Nichols are responsible, and they weren’t defending themselves. I think the government created the conditions, but in the end, the perpetrators are the ones who have to be held accountable in court. The government ought to be held accountable by the voters, but that never happens. I also do believe that the way FDR treated Japan forced their hand, though they had gone to war with mainland Asian countries long before the sanctions were imposed. And, it can be reasonably argued that the Lusitania was an intentional provocation. Most people don’t realize the German government took out ads warning she’d be sunk!”

“That one I didn’t know,” Eduardo replied.

“It’s true, and in fact, today is the anniversary of the German government publishing a warning in fifty American newspapers, including those in New York, that the Lusitania was sailing into a war zone and thus was liable to be sunk by a U-boat. And it appears some people listened, because her famously extravagant First Class accommodations were only about half full. Second Class was overbooked, but Third Class was less than a third full. Another fun point is that at the outbreak of the war, she was painted drab and otherwise disguised to make her harder to pick out, but after about a year, her old paint scheme was returned. And she sailed deliberately into a war zone.”

“But that doesn’t make it intentional, just negligent,” he protested.

“Until you consider that a week beforehand Winston Churchill, wrote that it was ‘most important to attract neutral shipping to our shores, in the hope especially of embroiling the United States with Germany’. Does THAT change your mind?”

“Jesus,” he replied.

“Yeah. And that doesn’t even go into the question of whether or not she was carrying contraband. And the sick part is, that war, like just about every other war in this century, was easily avoidable if people had been smart.”

“Aren’t you violating your ‘What if?’ rules?”

I shook my head, “No, I’m just saying that when you analyze what happened, every war was preventable. Russia foolishly stumbled into both the Russo-Japanese war and World War I, despite Stolypin’s advising the Tsar to do everything he could to ensure twenty years of peace. Russia was on her way to industrializing but got caught up in the morass of the Balkans. And World War II, well that was because of the idiocy at Versailles, plus the fact that everyone ignored what Churchill was saying until things got so bad they put him in charge. Korea and Vietnam were directly related to World War II. Of course, we could go back further, too, to Napoléon. or further back to Charlemagne.”

“Before this goes any further,” Kara interrupted, “we need to go get Jess so we can start the party!”

She and I left to walk to the hospital where we found Jessica waiting for us. We hugged, exchanged kisses, then started for home hand-in-hand-in-hand.

“Who’s at the house?” Jessica asked.

“Pretty much everyone,” Kara replied.

“Did you hear about that poor kid down in Florida? Elián González?”

Kara laughed, “Maria Cristina had a few choice words to say about that, and that let Steve go on one of his little historical complaint tours! But he was totally calm - no ranting, just his usual contrarian view of things.”

“That’s because I hold people responsible for their behavior and refuse to accept bullshit platitudes and hand-waving! And I refuse to accept conventional wisdom as actual wisdom of any kind!”

“He does run his company in a contrarian way,” Jessica said. “No outbursts?”

“No,” I replied. “I’m saving my energy for the after-birthday celebration.”

“You better!”

“Tough day, Jess?” I asked with a smirk. “You’re usually only feisty when you’ve had a frustrating day!”

“Not one, not two, but THREE ‘hold my beer and watch this’ incidents! Birgit would have been saying ‘dumb boys’ and shaking her head.”

“What happened?”

“Well, the one that takes the cake was the guy who thought he could hurdle a chain-link fence, you know, the kind where the link extends above the horizontal pole?”

“No!” I replied, shuddering at the thought of what happened.

“Yep. He lost a testicle.”

“Ouch,” I cringed.

“Then there was the guy who decided he could jump over a fire pit and landed in it. Fortunately for him, he was wearing jeans and went butt first, so ‘only’ 2nd degree burns on his butt because his friends quickly dumped water on him.”

“I’m afraid to ask the last one,” I replied.

“I actually went in reverse order. The other one was alcohol poisoning from shotgunning a bottle of Jack Daniel’s on a dare. That was a college kid. The others were in their late 20s.”

“What do you do for that?” I asked.

“Gave him glucose, thiamine, and oxygen. We also monitor for metabolic acidosis, and then you’d get dialysis. This was right on the border so we didn’t. The other risk is emesis and aspiration, but we managed that, as did the paramedics.”

“What the hell would possess anyone to do that?” I asked.

“Don’t ask me! You’re the ‘dumb boy’ with the Y chromosome! And I believe you’ve drunk too much alcohol in the past!”

“On a couple of occasions I got drunk with my Russian friends, but that’s a far cry from alcohol poisoning! Not to mention I learned early on how to pace myself and what to eat to reduce the deleterious after-effects of alcohol.”

“Does that really work?”

“I certainly didn’t have bad hangovers and my Russian friends all seem to be able to function after getting blotto! Vanya Voronin was a good teacher! I’m curious, do you ever get female patients who have done stupid things?”

“It’s pretty rare, really. A couple of years ago there was a gym rat who thought she could bench press as much as her male gym buddy. She misjudged the difference in muscle mass and strength and her arms collapsed. She only cracked a couple of ribs and her buddy got the bar off her chest pretty quickly and called 9-1-1.”

“Which university was the student from?” Kara asked.

“IIT. At one of the fraternities. I don’t remember which one.”

“Apes, Theta Xi, or Teps,” I replied. “The three party fraternities.”

“Apes?” Jessica asked.

“Alpha Epsilon Pi,” I replied. “Teps are Tau Epsilon Pi.”

“How do you know those?”

“Dave was a Sig Ep - Sigma Epsilon Pi; I knew some guys in Theta Xi and Teps as well.”

“Did you ever consider pledging a fraternity?”

“Not really,” I replied. “There didn’t seem to be a point. I did go to a couple of parties, including one at Sig Eps where Becky showed up because she was a little sister when she was at Rosary.”

“I don’t remember you telling me about that,” Kara said.

“I probably didn’t,” I replied. “Because despite Becky’s attempts to lasso me, I was singularly uninterested. But I know I wrote that in my journal.”

“I guess I don’t remember. When was that?”

“Kara,” Jessica interrupted, “I remember him telling us about her being a little sister before we married.”

“She’s right,” I added. “That would have been 1982 or 1983. I’d have to go back and look at my journals to be sure.”

“It’s OK,” Kara said. “I probably just blocked out any ‘Becky’ stories. And she’s totally irrelevant at this point. Did I tell you Abbie called and suggested a birthday present?”

“Do I even want to know?” I chuckled.

“Thirty-seven girls for your thirty seventh birthday!”

“Even with Viagra, that’s just not humanly possible!” Jessica declared.

“She didn’t say he’d cum thirty-seven times!” Kara corrected.

“I’ll settle for the two of you,” I teased.

“Settle?!” Kara screeched with mock outrage. “I’ll show YOU ‘settle’ tonight!”

I smirked, “I don’t WANT to be rescued!”

“Forget it Kara, there is nothing we’d actually do to him that he’d be upset about.”

We arrived at the house for a combined Guys’ and Girls’ Night to celebrate my birthday, and Penny’s. We had a great evening with food, friends, and lots of dancing, and I had an even better night with my wives doing their best to ensure I slept on the plane on the way to Colorado Springs.

April 23, 2000, en route from Chicago, Illinois to Denver, Colorado

My flight left the gate in Chicago on-time, about an hour before Stephanie’s. The rules which Bob and Deborah had put in place, with the Board’s approval, meant we couldn’t fly together, which was more than a little annoying, given that the plane crashing was statistically unlikely. That said, there had been a plane crash four days previously - an Air Philippines 737 had slammed into a mountain while circling in low clouds, killing 131. And earlier in the year an Alaska Airlines MD-83 had crashed into the Pacific Ocean due to a jammed stabilizer. And in Kenya, an Airbus 310 crashed just after takeoff.

On the plus side, in the aisle seat next to me in First Class was a pretty blonde who I guessed was sixteen or seventeen. When she smiled at me I took the opportunity to talk to her.

“Heading home?” I asked.

“Yes. My dad lives in Chicago and I came to see him for Spring Break. Mom and I live in Denver. Do you live in Chicago?”

“Yes. My company has offices in Colorado Springs and I’m heading there.”

“Your company? As in you own it?”

“I’m the majority shareholder, yes. I’m Steve Adams.”

“Suzanne Aavik. Nice to meet you Mr. Adams.”

“Call me Steve, please.”

She smiled again, “What does your company do?”

“Computer programming and consulting. I take it you’re in High School?”

“I’m a Junior.”

“Do you mind if I ask what your dad does?”

We were interrupted by the ‘safety video’ which always made me want to laugh. The idea that someone had no idea how to fasten a seatbelt always made me chuckle, but I realized it was remotely possible. The even bigger laugh was the ‘your seat cushion may be used as a flotation device’. I wondered, in the history of airline crashes, if that had EVER worked.

“He works for a management consulting firm in Chicago.”

“Which one?” I asked.

“Egon Zehnder. It’s a Swiss company.”

“They’re one of our clients,” I replied. “In fact, at some point later this year, I’ll be flying to Bogotá, Buenos Aires, and São Paulo to do some work. One of my staff took care of all of their US offices, plus Canada and Mexico. And a good friend of mine is dating Eduardo Colón, one of their consultants.”

“I know him,” she said. “his girlfriend is a pretty blonde with a couple of really cute kids.”

I wondered how much people at Egon Zehnder knew. It was a very conservative firm, even more conservative than the law firms and medical practices we served, and that led me to believe Eduardo had been very circumspect about my relationship with Elyse. I decided to just leave that alone rather than cause any potential problems for him.

“Dad flies you first class?” I asked.

“Upgrades. He flies so many miles for the company that he could never use them all.”

“I know the feeling,” I replied. “I did a Sydney, Singapore, Tokyo trip a few years ago, and I used to fly a lot more. I’ve cut down in recent years, but it’s picking up again.”

“How long will you be in Colorado?”

“I head to San Francisco on Tuesday evening. It’s a whirlwind tour visiting all our offices as well as our staff who work alone.”

The pilot announced we were next for takeoff and a minute later fire-walled the engines and the MD-80 hurtled down the runway and clawed its way into the air.

“Do you plan to go to college?” I asked.

“My dad would kill me if I didn’t!” she replied. “I’m going to apply to Loyola and Northwestern.”

“What do you plan to study?”

“Political science as pre-law.”

“Loki help me, another lawyer!”

“Loki?”

“The Norse god of chaos. I don’t worship him, but I have an affinity for him because of how very interesting my life has been.”

“And what’s wrong with lawyers?”

“Oh,” I smirked, “nothing except when they’re coming after me, or worse, ganging up and charging me $2000 an hour to protect me from OTHER lawyers!”

“You’ve been sued?”

“More times than I want to think about,” I replied. “Not to mention run-ins with the government starting when I was in college. What kind of law do you want to practice?”

“I’m not sure just yet; I have four years or so to figure it out.”

“By the way, I don’t totally hate lawyers; my company provides the most popular software available to run law offices.”

“So it’s a ‘love-hate’ relationship?”

“That sums it up quite nicely. I love them when they’re my clients or protecting me from government overreach. Otherwise? Not so much.”

We reached cruising altitude, and the stewardess served us drinks and a bowl of mixed nuts which had been warmed in the microwave.

“Did you live in Chicago before?” I asked. “Or did your dad move here?”

“We lived in Chicago until I was ten. Then Mom and Dad broke up. He remarried, and Mom has a boyfriend. They all get along pretty well; the divorce wasn’t ugly.”

“That’s good. I’ve seen a few ugly ones in my life. Brothers or sisters?”

“A younger brother who’s fourteen. Do you have kids?”

“I do. Want to see pictures?”

“Sure! I love kids.”

I took out the small picture wallet I’d started carrying which had individual pictures of each of the kids, plus a group picture, and pictures of each of the moms individually, and with their kids. Carla took new photos every year for us right before school started, though I wondered if she’d continue to do so. She hadn’t kept Rachel away from Jesse, but she also hadn’t spoken to me since our phone call.

I realized that I was going to have to reveal Eduardo’s secret because Suzanne had met Elyse, but there wasn’t much I could do about it given I’d offered to show her pictures. I handed her the wallet and she flipped through, stopping at Elyse and her kids, which was what I’d expected.

“Married a couple of times and divorced?” she asked.

I chuckled, “No. It’s WAY more complicated than that. I believe you recognize Elyse and her boys.”

“Obviously.”

She flipped through the pictures a few times as I told the story.

“Let me explain. First of all, the two strawberry blondes are, in their eyes, married. The boy with them is Jesse, my eldest. The woman on the left, Jennifer, was a girl I dated in High School who was a lesbian, but struggled with that concept until about halfway through college. When she graduated, we decided to have a kid together, something we’d talked about in Junior High and High School. The three of them - Jesse, Jennifer, and Josie, live on the same property, but in a separate house.

“Please keep this next part to yourself. Elyse and I were friends in High School, but we never really dated. We met at her aunt’s wedding, and kept in touch. We both came to Chicago for college, and when my roommate plans fell through, she and I rented a two-bedroom apartment together. It’s a long and complicated story, but we decided not to marry, though we did have two boys together, Matthew and Michael. Elyse had met Eduardo by then, but he’d gone back to Spain. When he moved back here, they got together again.”

“So you just had kids but were never a couple?”

“As I said, it’s complicated, as are most of my relationships. You see that picture with four kids and two women? Those are my wives and their kids.”

“Which one are you currently married to?”

“Both,” I replied. “One of them legally, but all three of us consider ourselves married to each other. The one on the left, Kara, is a Chemistry professor at UofC and Assistant Department Chair. Her two girls are Birgit and Stephie. The one on the right is Jessica, and she’s a trauma surgeon and professor of medicine at UofC, and her kids are Ashley and Albert.”

“Whoa!” she gasped.

“I did say it was complicated!”

“But it looks like these kids are all mixed in age. You were...”