Chapter 25: Milena and Joel

September 5, 1983, West Monroe, Ohio

"Now that you've had time to sleep on it, have you had any new thoughts?" Clarissa asked as we walked along the road from my house towards 'downtown' West Monroe on Monday morning.

"Should I have new thoughts?" I asked.

"Let me put it this way — if you're going to change your mind, do it NOW, today. If she shows up in McKinley expecting two passion-filled nights and you back out, it's going to be VERY ugly."

"Why would I back out? You and Liz made very good points; I thought about those, then saw how Tasha handled Janey and decided you and Liz were right. I was still seeing Tasha as the same fourteen-year-old I first noticed four years ago. She's not that girl. And I'm not the seventeen-year-old guy I was then, either."

"Have you given any thought to what Sasha might do?"

"Not really, but honestly, at this point, I don't think anything she does will have an effect on Tasha and me. I believe Deacon Vasily finally came to believe Tasha was telling the truth about our relationship. If he hadn't, he'd never have agreed to let her come for the weekend."

"Because then he'd be condoning it."

"Exactly. And really, what can Sasha do? Have sex? He already thinks she did that. Get caught in bed with a guy? That would only make things worse for her. Get pregnant? Disaster. What does that really leave? Dating someone Deacon Vasily doesn't like? That's possible but difficult because she doesn't have a car, and she's only sixteen."

"You and Maggie?"

"Exactly. And you see how well that's worked out," I groused.

"True. Do you think Janey will cause any trouble?"

I laughed, "Do YOU think she will?"

"I sure wouldn't want to go up against Tasha if she had her dander up!"

"It was Tasha's comment about Janey that finally broke through the stupid picture I've had of her for the past few years."

"I'm curious, WAS Janey's pussy that rotten?"

I chuckled, "You know I can't answer that! But you know my difficulties with Janey were basically about differing philosophies about our relationship and the future."

"Would you consider any of the sex you've had 'bad'?"

"From a physical point of view? No. Emotionally? You know how I felt after Kristin and Katy."

"But you came to terms with those, so you wouldn't say it was 'bad' now, would you?"

"I suppose the one incident that I'd call 'bad' was that single handjob from Carol. That WAS bad in just about every way. To put it crudely, I've had more fulfilling orgasms alone."

"Ouch!" Clarissa laughed. "Now THAT is a serious insult! But you wouldn't say that about Janey, would you?"

"I have to say 'no comment' because otherwise I'm on a slippery slope."

"So, no play-by-play of you and Tasha?" she asked with a smirk.

"Only if you participate!"

"Oh yes, of course," Clarissa said sarcastically, "Tasha Antonova is going to not just have sex with you but lose her virginity by engaging in a wild threesome with the two of us!"

"She did say you were VERY cute, and the emphasis was hers!"

"No way!" Clarissa laughed.

"Not only that, but she asked me what «некультурный» (nekulturny) image formed in my mind. I replied that if she knew that, then SHE was equally «некультурный» (nekulturny)!" ("inappropriate")

"Oh my God!" Clarissa exclaimed. "When was that?"

"BEFORE I spoke to you on Saturday night!"

"Which helped you see, eventually, she isn't the same innocent little girl you drooled over."

"Tasha was NEVER innocent!" I laughed. "She was already talking about what she wanted to do in the 'marriage bed' at fifteen! And Sasha appears to be of the same mind on that topic, though I'm not sure she has the same restraint Tasha had at her age."

"According to you, Tasha had ZERO restraint; that's why she had you make the promise. And that's something you failed to remember once your relationship with Tasha changed. And that all started with the confrontation with Janey."

"So acting like a complete cad turned out to be a positive thing?" I asked with a silly grin.

"That's not exactly a good life plan, Petrovich!"

"I'd like to hear your unvarnished opinion of my decision."

"I think you had to find a way to resolve the tension you created in your own mind and between the two of you. You kept telling yourself Tasha was your perfect girl, but your behavior didn't match what you were telling yourself. You justified your other relationships by pointing to the fact that Tasha's dad wouldn't allow her to date. She, despite wanting you as a lover and eventual husband, looked the other way until she couldn't.

"In effect, you both lied to yourselves and, to some extent, each other. She really DID object to you being with other girls despite what she said, and you led her to believe you were simply dating when you were, and I say this advisedly, banging pretty much any girl who offered. It all came to a head when she caught you kissing Janey. At that point, you and Tasha both had to admit to yourselves that you were living a lie.

"Once you both admitted it to yourselves, then it was a matter of admitting it to each other. You went first by basically confessing to fooling around and hiding it from Tasha. She didn't know the extent of it, I suspect, but ultimately, once was all that mattered. Once you admitted that and apologized for the way you treated her, she could be honest with you. And that honesty led you both to conclude the same thing — the life you thought you might have together was pure fantasy.

"Once you admitted your teenage fantasy to yourselves and each other, then it was a question of what to do. She, in effect, put the ball in your court by drawing out an admission of something I'm sure she knew to be true — that you weren't going to propose to her right after her graduation. She'd suspected that for some time, but once it was out in the open, THEN you two could think about a proper adult relationship.

"The question in Tasha's mind then came down to deciding her best course of action. I think she would still prefer to marry you, if that were possible. But there's a real chance that might not happen. I believe she sees the most likely way to that destination is to make love with you, something she's wanted to do for four years but held back because she thought that would happen no later than June of next year.

"Once that was effectively off the table, she decided that she'd been mistaken to wait. Her problem was, she'd made you promise not to let her change her mind about the timing. And she knew you were steadfast and had the willpower to keep that promise. There really was no way forward for her if you stuck to that promise, which she expected you to. Fortuitously, Janey did what Tasha was unable to do — get you to see things in a different light."

"Don't leave out you and Liz beating the crap out of me," I replied.

"Your sister knows you very well, Mike, and she's adamant that Tasha isn't the right girl for you."

"I know she believes that, but I think it's misguided."

"I think she might not be articulating it properly. But she also put you together with Maggie."

"That was, and remains, a longshot."

"True. Liz had backup plans."

I laughed, "Of COURSE she did. Do I want to know? Do YOU know?"

Clarissa laughed, "Yes. She told me. If you truly were a pig, you'd tell Liz you had no interest in Maggie."

"Oh?"

"Imagine Liz having a sleepover while you were home. With six girls from your old church. Each of whom visited you to give you a chance to sample their charms."

I laughed hard, "Right! Because THAT would happen!"

"OK, maybe not!" Clarissa replied through her own laughter. "Liz and I laughed about that, but it was never a REAL idea. But she felt Valerie or Anastasia might be good options for you. Or one of the older High School girls at your new church. I guess she knows them from some youth group outings?"

I nodded, "She does. And I wonder if she's the one who stirred the pot with Yuliana and Angelina."

"I honestly don't know. But if Maggie hadn't worked out, Liz was going to try to get you to talk with Valerie."

"Does Liz realize that despite her complete disdain for the «съборъ бабушек» (sobor babushki), she's acting EXACTLY like them?"

"She's more Russian than she thinks she is," Clarissa laughed. "And you are less Russian than Liz thinks you are. You like certain very specific traditions, and you like being able to swear in Russian, but I can't imagine you running a household anything like Deacon Vasily's."

"Never. Did Liz talk to you about her future?"

"What an unholy mess THAT is going to be," Clarissa said, shaking her head.

"Tell me about it," I replied, shaking my head. "But when it comes right down to it, no matter what the State of Ohio says, he didn't rape her. Not even close. I think my mom might eventually accept that; my dad never will."

"He sees what happened to her with those college boys and with Paul as identical?"

"Yes. And at first, I did, too. Well, and I had a severe moral issue with her being with a married guy who had a baby."

"Mike Loucks judgmental? Wow!"

"I know. It was an error, and if I had stopped to think it through at the time, I probably wouldn't have done what I did. But then those other «мудаки» (mudaki) would have gotten away with rape. I don't buy the whole 'ends justify the means' argument, but I find it hard to think that anything I did which put actual rapists in jail was wrong."

"That's a tough call, but I have to agree with you that the assholes belong in jail. Does Paul know you turned him in?"

"I have to assume so, which is going to be more than a bit awkward. I'm hoping my full support for Liz will cover that faux pas."

"Two years in jail seems a bit much to overlook."

"I know. But he can be as angry with me as he wants, so long as he takes good care of Liz."

"And you think a guy who is married, has a kid and has an affair with a fourteen-year-old girl exercises the judgment necessary to take good care of her?"

"I have no idea," I replied. "Liz loves him, and this is what she wants. If he doesn't take care of her, then I'll do my best to help her resolve the situation."

"You're torn, aren't you?"

"I think she's making a terrible mistake, but it's her choice to make it. I gave my opinion, but once she made up her mind, I committed to supporting her. I was thinking about how I'd deal with my kids, and honestly, when they get to a certain age, you have to let them go their own way."

"What age is that?"

I grinned, "Probably about one year older than they actually are at any given time!"

Clarissa laughed, "Nice!"

"If you want a serious answer, then at some point in their mid-to-late teens, I'd say. You do your best to teach and guide, but they have to make the decisions."

"Sex?"

"That's the big one. But there are career choices, marriage choices, and so on. Deacon Vasily is learning the lesson the hard way, and I'm observing and developing my thinking. I have the way my mom and dad treated me and Liz as another example."

"And the way mine treated me?"

"Let's just say that I can't imagine ANY scenario where I would reject my own child, no matter what. And that includes having a kid who is gay or lesbian. Would it cause turmoil at church? You bet. Would that stop me from loving them? Never. And along those lines, you're invited for Thanksgiving. We'll work something out for Christmas, even if it means canceling my skiing trip."

"Don't do that!"

"Lissa, if you can't go home, then I want to be with you!"

"Liz is here, and so is Tasha."

"So you and Tasha are going to become chummy?" I smirked.

"Oh, stop!" Clarissa laughed. "I do not want to have sex with every pretty girl who comes along!"

"The fact that you took my smirk to mean that says your mind is in the gutter with mine!"

"Was that EVER a question?" Clarissa asked, laughing. "I believe I enjoy sex just as much as you do! But just as there are plenty of girls you wouldn't have sex with, there are plenty of girls I wouldn't have sex with!"

"You don't mind my teasing you about it, do you?"

"You put up with me, so I suppose it's only fair that I put up with you!"

We walked into the small coffee shop next to the Town Hall and across from the fire and police station and got two bottles of Coke, then walked towards the playground where kids were playing baseball and tossing Frisbees.

"Are we still planning to go to Milena's house tonight after we get back?" Clarissa asked.

"Yes. She wants me to meet Joel. I do need to find a date for Friday, or else go stag when you have Glenda, and she has Joel."

"Ask Kimiko, you dope!" Clarissa laughed.

She took a swig from her Coke, and I smirked.

"What?" she asked suspiciously.

"I was enjoying watching you wrap your lips around that bottle, that's all!"

"You PIG!" she spat.

"At your service, Ma'am!"

Clarissa rolled her eyes, and we continued our walk around the playground and then back towards the house.

September 5, 1983, McKinley, Ohio

"Mike, Clarissa, this is Joel Greene. Joel, my friends Mike Loucks and Clarissa Saunders."

I shook hands with the sandy-haired, deeply-tanned, lanky Joel.

"Nice to meet you," I said.

"Thanks. Nice to meet you, too! I believe I owe you a major debt of gratitude."

"All I did was serve as a sounding board for Milena," I replied.

"That's not the way I hear it! And nice to meet you, too, Clarissa."

"Same here," Clarissa replied.

"I have a couple of bottles of wine," Milena said. "I take it you two are up for a couple of glasses? And Mike, can I convince you to sing with me?"

I smiled, "You know the answer to that question at this point! And I'm OK with a couple of glasses of wine if Clarissa is?"

"Count me in for violating Ohio law!" Clarissa laughed.

"They can pass all the laws they want," Milena laughed, "but nobody, and I mean NOBODY, is going to stop college kids from drinking!"

"Tell that to Dean Parker," I said, shaking my head.

"Our local version of the KGB," Milena groused to Joel. "She's taken it upon herself to ensure everyone follows the party 'diktats'."

"One of those, huh?" he asked.

"If you look up 'bitch' in the dictionary, her picture is there," Clarissa said.

"Pretty much," I agreed.

"So basically, the opposite of Lena's mom, then."

"Doctor Blahnik is pretty cool," I said.

"Only pretty cool, Mister Loucks?" I heard Doctor Blahnik ask from behind me.

"Uh, no, of course not!" I exclaimed. "The coolest of the cool! Cooler than Fonzie!"

Everyone laughed.

"Better!" Doctor Blahnik said. "Go have fun, kids."

"Let's go into the music room!" Milena said, still laughing.

"I need to talk to your mom for a moment," I said.

"Sure."

Milena, Joel, and Clarissa went towards the music room, and I walked over to Doctor Blahnik.

"Starting the Friday after next, I'd like to use the guest room for the weekend."

"Of course," she agreed. "You don't have to ask!"

I smiled, "A friend of mine will be staying. And her dad is probably going to call to confirm she's staying here."

Doctor Blahnik smiled knowingly, "And he's not to know about the assignation which will take place, is that it?"

"I'd appreciate it. I don't think he'll ask any questions which would require you to lie. If he does, then answer the way you'll know he wants and I'll figure something out."

"I think I can manage," Doctor Blahnik laughed. "And then there is the favor you'll owe me!"

"Why do I feel like one of Don Corleone's friends right now?"

"I promise no horse's heads in your bed!" she laughed. "But something will come up, I'm sure."

I could have sworn I heard just the slightest emphasis on 'up', but I wondered if my mind was playing tricks on me from the bit of teasing that had gone on before.

"Thanks. Just ask for that favor when you need it."

"You can be sure I will!" she said, tilting her head slightly and smiling.

I nodded and then went to the music room to join Milena, Joel, and Clarissa. Milena handed me a glass of red wine, and I sat down on the loveseat next to Clarissa.

"I've heard a lot about you," Joel said to me.

"And I've heard a lot about you," I replied.

"I'm sorry, but Milena wasn't totally clear about your relationship. I mean, you and Clarissa."

"We're best friends," I replied.

"I'm lesbian!" Clarissa laughed. "I can't believe she didn't tell you!"

"I didn't think it was my place," Milena replied.

"I'm completely out! I told my parents, and you know what happened. I don't hide it anymore. And besides, I'm bringing Glenda as my date to dinner on Friday!"

"Are you bringing someone, Mike?" Milena asked. "If not, I can invite Deb, or you can play the roulette wheel and see who I invite!"

"He's bringing Kimiko!" Clarissa declared.

"Lissa!" I protested. "I haven't even agreed to ask her, let alone ask her!"

"He's going to ask her. Plan on it."

"The boss has spoken," I said acidly.

"Oh, cut it out!" Clarissa demanded. "She's interested, and you're interested. You're going to ask her."

"Obviously," I said flatly.

"Ignore him," Clarissa said. "He's just being his usual «глупец» (glupys) self!"

"His what self?" Joel asked.

"Blockhead! Mike is half-Russian by genetics, fully Russian in his thinking. And just as stubborn as any Russian man, from what I can tell about them!"

"And she's as domineering as any Russian «бабушка» (babushka) I've ever encountered!" I declared.

"That word, I know," Joel laughed. "I'm obviously missing something here."

"Mike is between girlfriends," Milena said. "And it appears his best friend believes he should ask a cute Japanese girl from his dorm on a date."