Chapter 1

“Look, I know that we’ve dated in the past, but it’s just ... over, Betty. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t go there. I’m done. You dumped me, I nearly dumped you before, and it’s just ... it was nice while it lasted, but remember what I told you. It just wouldn’t last and it hasn’t. You really like me and I really like you, but your heart is with Archie and you know it,” Jughead Jones finally fessed up.

“Archie’s dating Veronica and has for a while now! I refuse to break them up or hurt my friendship with Ronnie. We swore to each other that we wouldn’t let a guy come between us, ever again,” Betty objected fiercely, though part of her knew that Jughead was right.

“So, don’t. Just date Archie. He loves you. You love him. I think that he’s finally open to you two together. I think that Ronnie would be cool with sharing him. It works for Toni, Cheryl, and me,” Jughead let slip his situation.

“Wait, you just said that I should be with Archie, not you, like it’s a zero-sum game, but you want me to believe that you’re cool with sharing Toni with Cheryl and Ronnie would share Archie with me. What gives, what’s really going on here? It doesn’t make sense!” Betty fumed now.

“Sure, it does! Every relationship is different, Betty. You and I ... we’re too different to make it work. I’m a slacker and a cynic. That’s just who I am. I’m a Southside Serpent, babe. You ... you need Archie. So does Ronnie. You both like him and love him ... and need him, because he needs both of you in ways that I never could. You both like the way that he’s so great in many ways, so yet so ... attached to both of you.

“Archie needs both of you and that’s what both of you need. He looks out for you in ways that I can’t. He basically treats both of you as his girlfriends, like it or not. He’ll fucking drop everything for you two, both of you. Look, both of you even took him to the prom, okay? Both of you did. You said it yourself, you don’t want to fight over him or any other boy. So don’t. Share Archie like you pretended to share Chuck. Go with your heart, Betty. It tells you that Archie’s your man, and he’s Ronnie’s man, too,” Jughead waxed rather profound right then.

“You sound very deep right now, Jug. Part of me is really gonna miss being your girlfriend,” Betty told Jughead with a last peck on the lips.

“Yes, but you’d miss Archie more. Face facts, Betty. We’re good friends, we always will be, but in your heart, you know that Archie’s for you. And for Ronnie. It’s just meant to be. You’re both meant to share him,” Jughead insisted as he grabbed another bite of his favorite cheeseburger.

“Okay, then what about you ... and Toni. And Cheryl. What’s the deal there?” Betty brought up that love triangle as well.

“Look, Toni and I fool around whenever we both feel the need. It’s not a constant thing. It’s off and on, and so it has Cheryl’s blessing. I’m the palate cleanser. I really don’t have to do it that often. When I do, it ... just works better with Toni. She likes Cheryl better. It’s a weird kind of mismatch, those two, but it works for them. And ... sometimes, when Cheryl needs some dick, I give her some, too. She makes it worth my trouble,” Jughead explained his menage a trois with Toni Topaz and Cheryl Blossom.

“Worth it how? Buys you more burgers?” Betty teased Jughead, relaxing more now that she knew what she had to do.

“Something like that,” Jughead shrugged.

“Maybe I should buy you burgers, too,” Betty needled Jughead, who smiled shyly, but let it slide.

“Do what you want. I wouldn’t kick you out of bed, but we’re doomed as a couple, Betty. Archie’s your destiny, just as he’s Ronnie’s. That’s just how it is. You should both date him. That’s all I’m saying,” Jughead elaborated, right as Toni and Cheryl walked into Pop’s together and ordered a milkshake, winking at him.

“I get it. You’re a booty call for them. That’s what you prefer. You don’t even use them that way, but you’re cool with them using you, because they keep their distance. Just as you like. Hell, you’d probably be cool with Kevin or Moose using you that way, as long as you didn’t have to be too caught up in it. I ... I understand now, Juggy. You feel the need to hold everyone at arm’s length. To be aloof. I ... get it. The outsider, even in love.

“I’m gonna miss this, but I won’t force it on you. And you’re right. I do love Archie. But if I can share him with Ronnie, and you can share Toni with Cheryl, there’s no reason why he can’t share me with you. That’s ... up to you, though. It’s an open invite. Just for you, Jughead Jones. Otherwise, Ronnie and I are both faithful to Archie. Not for morals. Just because that’s how it is,” Betty stole one more kiss before leaving Jughead to his burgers and his bisexual fuckbuddies.

“So, what was Betty’s deal? Are you two an item again?” Toni slid next to Jughead in the booth, while facing Cheryl in a passionate stare.

“Betty and I are now officially done. Toast. That was a goodbye kiss. I like her, but she likes me too much ... and Archie too much, for it to work. She doesn’t need our little triad. She’s got one of her own with Archie Andrews. Betty Cooper, Archie Andrews, and Veronica Lodge. Once they went to that prom together, the three of them, I knew, in my heart of hearts, that they would all end up a throuple. That’s just how they are, and I’m happy for them.

“What we have, however, works better for us. It’s mostly a V with you as the pivot, but with a little fun on the side for Cheryl and me now and then. It’s just how it is. Nothing wrong with that, is there?” Jughead stipulated now.