Chapter 9

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 20, 1991

I woke up long before my alarm clock was set to go off, feeling sick to my stomach.

The anguish was physical, not just emotional. The events from the night before played out in my head while I considered what to do.

I hadn’t missed a school day for being sick in years. And if I did call in sick, I couldn’t participate in any sport or activity that day. That meant missing the Homecoming game and the dance. The idea didn’t really seem so bad at first, but a larger part of me was sort of defiant. Of course, word of what had happened the night before would travel fast and there was no way I was going to back down from that short fuckwad Daryn Lang.

I had to show up. I had to be the better man. Besides, I was the one who had been wronged.

Anger overcame anguish. I was going to use it to get to school and get through the day and God help Daryn Lang if we crossed paths.

I got in the shower much earlier than usual, lathering up in soap and trying not to think about what had happened. I rolled through the emotions again, settling back on that same sadness I’d lived through for months after Mel died. I felt like that was a little melodramatic, but it was how I worked through it the year before. I wandered between sadness and anger. I got over Mel because I could always be angry with her for what she had done. It was the same that morning.

I could get over Jen if I could stay angry with her.

But could I be her friend again that way? Did it matter? It really didn’t, I decided as I toweled off, anger simmering up once again.

Attire was an easy choice. It was School Colors Day. I just wore the royal blue jersey I’d be wearing that night at the game.

Mom and Dad could tell something was off during breakfast, but seemed to avoid broaching the subject.

Dad was ready to head out to finish chores as I got ready to head to school.

“Well, that’s strange,” Dad said, looking out the front window.

“What?” I asked.

“There’s a red-haired girl standing in the driveway.”

“What?” I asked in surprise, then looked out the window with him.

Autumn was standing there shivering in a black jacket and white beanie over her long, red curls with her backpack slung over her shoulder. She knelt down to pet George.

“I’m pretty sure she’s here for you,” he grinned.

“Yeah,” I said absently, putting my shoes on and grabbing my jacket.

I practically ran outside, wondering how she’d gotten there and what was going on.

“Hey,” I said in confusion as I walked out to her.

“Good morning,” she said flatly. “We have to talk.”

I led Autumn to the small garage where I kept Sally. Dew was heavy on the grass and there was a little fog around the farm yard.

“How did you?”

“Lea dropped me off,” Autumn interrupted me coldly. “I had to talk to you before you got to school.”

Remembering the events from the night before as I opened the garage doors and pulled the car out, I knew I needed to apologize to her before anything else.

Autumn got into the idling car and sat down, shivering in the cool air.

“I’m sorry if I hurt your wrist last night,” I said in contrition.

She put her hand around her wrist absently and looked at me sadly.

“You didn’t really hurt me. I was just scared,” she admitted. “You weren’t yourself,” she shook her head.

“Would you be?” I asked bitterly.

“Jake, you can’t be mad at Jen,” she shook her head.

My eyes widened and I looked at her in surprise. “And why not?”

“Start driving,” she said coldly. “I have a lot to say.”

I considered her for a moment, then turned up the heat in the car and rolled down the long gravel driveway.

Sensing I needed to listen, I just held the wheel and nodded to her. This could go in a million directions, and I wondered which way it would go.

“Jake, you can’t be mad at her,” Autumn launched into her speech. “Morgan set the whole thing up. She brought Daryn there. She wanted them to play Truth or Dare, and she was the one who dared them to go in there for seven minutes.”

I looked over at Autumn in surprise, but I was still resigned to what I had seen.

“That doesn’t change anything,” I said flatly. “She could have said no.”

“Like you’ve ever said no,” Autumn rolled her eyes, but gave me a serious look. “And that’s certainly not all.”

“That’s not all?” I asked in confusion.”

“No, Jake, that’s not all. If I hadn’t turned you down last night we would have gone off somewhere and had sex. You know that. That’s way worse than a kiss that Jen didn’t return.”

It hit me like a hammer to the chest. She was right. As betrayed as I had felt at seeing Jen and Daryn together, I had just asked Autumn to be with me again.

“What have I done?”

“You didn’t actually do anything, thanks to me,” she reassured me with a meaningful grin, seeming rather pleased with herself. “And that wasn’t easy,” she admitted.

A half grin covered my smug face.

“Don’t you dare smile about it, mister!” she admonished me.

“Sorry,” I conceded.

“You should be. You hurt her terribly last night. Lea kicked everyone out and we had a long heart-to-heart with her. She sat there crying and holding the pictures of you two. She said her heart broke when you threw them out and she saw what they were. She wants so badly to be with you, but now she thinks she lost you forever.”

That was a lot to take in, but what surprised me most was that she said Jen’s heart was broken.

“Has she?” Autumn asked imperiously, an eyebrow cocked at me.

“Has she what?” I asked in confusion.

“Has she lost you forever?” Autumn demanded.

“I ... Wait, did you say heartbroken?”

“Heartbroken!” Autumn said sharply, her voice almost shrill.

“I didn’t know she felt that way,” I said in surprise.

“Well she does, or did,” Autumn rolled her eyes. “You two just need to get it all out there!” she said in exasperation.

“I did!” I said defensively. “I told her I wanted to be her boyfriend. I told her she was the only one I wasn interested in.”

“Until you weren’t,” Autumn accused.

Shamed once again, I felt awful.

“Did you tell her that?”

“No,” Autumn said quietly. “I didn’t tell her that part, but I did tell her you were already on the brink and ready to give up. I told her if she didn’t tell you how she feels in a hurry you’d be with someone else.”

“Like at the dance tonight?”

“Yes, I told her you were taking a girl to the dance,” she admitted.

I nodded in understanding. A little spark of hope caught flame inside me.

“If she wants me, I’m going to have to tell her about us, about what I asked you to do” I nodded.

“That would be wise,” Autumn agreed. “Be sure to include the part where I turned you down.”

“Yeah,” I said ruefully. “Thanks for denying me, I guess.”

“You’re welcome,” she said more warmly.

“Do you regret it?” I asked dubiously.

“Jake,” she admonished me sharply, pinching the top of her nose like I was giving her a bad headache. “Figure out this Jen thing before you ask me something like that again.”

Sensing her discomfort, I apologized again.

“I’m sorry. That wasn’t fair,” I admitted.

“No. It wasn’t,” she agreed as we pulled into the parking lot, then I made a terrible realization.

“Shit!” I swore, looking at Autumn in panic. “I forgot Mikey!”

“That’s OK, you have time,” she said, looking at her watch. “Drop me off and go get him. I just needed to make sure I was the first person to talk to you today.”

“Well, you got that done,” I congratulated her as I pulled up to the sidewalk in front of the Sophomore hallway.

She jumped out and grabbed her bag.

“Hey, wait. You don’t have a costume for today?” I asked.

“Oh I do. I have to go put it on now,” she grinned.

“Alright, I gotta go get Mikey.”

Autumn shook her head at me with a grin and headed inside.

“Sorry I’m late!” I said as Mikey got into the car.

“What’s up?” he asked quizzically.

“Uh, well, I forgot to pick you up,” I admitted.

“How far did you get?”

“Uh, all the way to school,” I shrugged with a guilty grin.

“Dude? You didn’t notice you forgot me until you got to school?”

“Well, I was distracted. Autumn was waiting in my driveway when I was leaving.”

“Autumn? How did she get out to the farm?”

I rolled my eyes and gave him the quick version of what had transpired overnight as we pulled into the parking lot at school.

“I missed a lot,” he nodded in wonder.

“Well, now you’re up to speed.”

“What are you gonna do?”

“I don’t know, but first I want to talk to Jen.”

Her Bronco was nowhere to be seen in the parking lot. It was getting late, and we had to head inside.

I should have expected the murmurs and glances as I walked down the hallway. Apparently last night’s drama was hot rumor fodder. I steeled my spine and headed to my locker.

I grabbed my Algebra book and was stunned at what I saw when I closed my locker door.

Autumn had changed into her school colors outfit, the last of the week. I’m not sure what strings she had to pull to get permission to do it, but she had found her way to a County West football uniform, complete with eye black under each eye. Long socks and black hightops finished the look. She didn’t bother with a helmet and she still looked cute with two long pigtails.

The whole outfit would have been more overwhelming if she didn’t look so concerned.

“No one has seen Jen,” she said quietly.

“Her Bronco wasn’t in the parking lot,” I shook my head.

“Well, we’ll keep an eye out for her and let you know.”

“Who’s ‘we?’” I had to ask.

“Me, Lea, Shelby,” Autumn shrugged.

Well, at least some people were on my side.

Classes were abbreviated for the pep rally, and we’d be getting out of school early. Lunch would come last, just before the pep rally, then we’d be dismissed.

I got more worried after Spanish class, when Jen didn’t show up. On a hunch, I snuck out to the parking lot for a quick peek. The Black Bronco was there, but Jen was nowhere to be seen.

At least she was at school. I just couldn’t find her anywhere.

Lea was apologetic at Study Hall. Jen still was nowhere to be found.

“I never should have let Morgan bring Daryn,” she said sadly.

“It’s not your fault,” I whispered. “You didn’t know what she was up to.”

“No, but I should have guessed,” she said ruefully.

Beast listened intently, but didn’t offer much to the conversation, until the end.

“You ever wonder why Morgan hates you so much?”

“All the time,” I whispered in frustration.

“You should probably get to the bottom of that,” he nodded sagely.

He was probably right, but for now, I had nothing but hate for her.

Classes were flying by, but I could only worry about Jen. Autumn was in the same boat in Journalism class.

“Her truck is here, but no one has seen her all day,” Autumn said in concern.

“Maybe she’ll show up at lunch?” I shrugged.

“She has to be in school if she wants to play in the game tonight,” she nodded.

“I know. School policy. No way she would miss a game unless she was actually sick, and her Bronco is here.”

“It doesn’t make any sense,” Autumn said in exasperation.

“Well, what did she say she was going to do last night?”

“She wasn’t sure. She just said it was going to be really hard to face you.”

“So she’s avoiding me?”

“She’s probably avoiding almost everyone. News travels fast.”

“Right,” I said sadly.

“But she should at least know she can come to Lea or me, or even Shelby.”

“I hope she does.”

The day seemed strange with the altered schedule, and lunch was going to be awkward.

I grabbed a tray of grilled cheese “bricks” and tomato soup and sat in my usual spot, minus Jen.

“Where’s Jen?” Morgan asked with a wicked grin.

I glared at her and thought over my best response. Autumn reached for my forearm.

“I don’t know, Morgan, but she’s probably still very upset at what you did,” I said venomously.

Silence fell over the noisy table as we squared off verbally.

“What I did?” she made a rude noise. “I didn’t do a thing. She just cheated on you before you had a chance to cheat on her.”

My face hardened further. There was no way she knew what I had asked Autumn to do. She was just being a general bitch instead of a specific one. Still, my blood was boiling.

“If you say so, Morgan. How do you feel about hurting your teammate? Do you think she’ll ever want to be friends with you after that stunt? You know what you did. She knows what you did. I know what you did.”

She rolled her eyes and scoffed at me. “You two did what you two were going to do. If I helped, so be it,” she said haughtily.

I’d had enough. More than enough.

“Morgan,” I said flatly, picking up my lunch tray. “I don’t think I could possibly eat while looking at your face. You ruin everything around you, including my appetite. Enjoy.”

With that, I got up and walked to a nearby long table that was mostly empty. Mikey didn’t hesitate, and picked up his tray behind me. Autumn followed quickly behind him, with Lea right behind her.

No one spoke to Morgan. Everyone seemed to be making a choice. I didn’t even consider asking anyone to join me.

Beast and Tree looked at each other and picked up their trays and left the table. Shelby probably couldn’t quite hear what had transpired, but she was insisting that Chris leave the table with her.

Then Mandy picked up her tray, leaned in toward Morgan and quite loudly called her a “fucking bitch!” Mitch, Kim, Allison, Woody, Wyatt Jones and Brian Thompson all picked up their trays and left Morgan stunned and alone.

We all squeezed in at the end of the table and watched as Morgan tried to keep her composure. She sobbed once, then picked up her tray, emptied it and left the lunchroom in a huff.

Mandy broke the silence and told me how sorry she felt about what had happened. Many of the rest nodded or offered the same. Mikey clapped me on the shoulder. Autumn squeezed my hand. Shelby gave me a look of concern. I was grateful for such support. I nodded sadly back and let them know I hoped it would turn out OK.

The mood was entirely different at the pep rally at the gymnasium. Still no sign of Jen, the festivities were underway, with a packed set of bleachers.

The mood was set as the lights dimmed. Recorded wolf howls were repeated by the ravenous student section.

“AROOOOOOOOO!”

The pep band played a couple of songs. The cheerleaders put on a show that was borderline scandalous. I would have enjoyed it immensely on a different day. But, I could only worry about Jen and where she might be.

A little skit was put on with our head coach, who was ready to give a big speech before Homecoming King and Queen Mark Carter and Cindy Davis came out to much applause, then announced the spirit award.

“This year’s spirit award was unanimous. The homecoming court all voted, and we select,” Cindy said, looking at Mark.

“Drumroll please!” Mark asked loudly.

The pep band started up a drumroll and both king and queen called out at once.

“AUTUMN KENT!” they shouted in unison.

The crowd went nuts, we looked around for her, only to see her near the stage wearing the football uniform with the camera around her neck. She was already taking photos when her name was called. She covered her mouth with her hand, then our Journalism teacher pulled the camera strap over her shoulders and practically pushed the redhead toward the stage.

As the crowd quieted, Cindy spoke again.

“No one has put as much effort into it as Autumn this week. She has dressed up like no one else every day, and she’s still the one taking all the pictures for the yearbook. So let’s get a few pictures of our Spirit Award winner!”

“AROOOOOOOO!”

Autumn walked up on the stage and Mark put a ribbon and medal over the blushing redhead’s neck. She grinned as the school royalty stood side-by-side with her for a couple of photos.

I was nearly happy enough to forget all about Jen, but still that uneasy feeling wouldn’t go away. I was really proud of Autumn. She’d come such a long way in such a short time. Her shyness and awkwardness was a thing of the past, mostly. Again, I couldn’t help but feel proud for being a part of it.

The pep band played her off again, and Coach Harvey grabbed the microphone to give his best stirring speech, getting the crowd into a frenzy to beat and embarrass County Central tonight.

“AROOOOOOOO!”

I almost felt normal.

There was plenty of time to go home. I dropped Mikey off at his place, then headed to the farm. I knew that I needed to get something to eat, but I just had to try to call Jen first. I pulled her card out of my wallet and dialed her number from my teen line. I fidgeted while the line kept ringing until the machine picked up.

“You’ve reached Fox Upholstery. No one is available to take your call right now. Please leave a message and we’ll get back to you as soon as we can. Thank you!” Jen’s mom’s cheerful voice gave me no relief.

I didn’t leave a message, and I know immediately how much that would irritate me to get no message on a missed call. I briefly considered calling again, then second-guessed myself.

She has a game too, I thought. She might not even be home.

It did no good to sit around and worry, so I made a couple of turkey sandwiches and a couple of peanut butter cookie sandwiches and gobbled that all down.

The empty feeling in my gut still didn’t go away.

“I tried calling, but no one picked up,” I told Mikey on the way back to school.

“She’ll show up eventually, dude. She has to,” he nodded.

Many scenarios played out in my head over where she was and what she was thinking, few of them positive. Fortunately, tonight was a varsity game, so I would only have to worry about playing if the score got out of hand. Our rivalry with County Central was lengthy, and both teams had been fairly balanced over the years, with Central taking more wins than they were due. Mercy might not be in Coach’s plans.

We got dressed in the silence that the upperclassmen preferred. Our sophomore team liked a raucous locker room before a game. We played music, and we played it loud. We liked to be loose and free. The upperclassmen liked to be focused and intense. For now, we’d play by their rules, but we knew our time would come.

We had just a little time before we had to head out for warmups, so I snuck out to peek in at the volleyball game. My heart soared and felt darkened all at once with my first glimpse of Jen. She’d somehow figured out a way to be at the game. She was sitting on the sidelines with her sophomore teammates, cheering on her team. She looked intense, but a little distracted. I wasn’t able to make eye contact with her before I had to leave what looked like a pretty close match.

I padded back to the locker room and laced up my cleats, then headed out to the field with the rest of the team for warmups. Already, a crowd was assembling on our side of the field to get the best seats. Blankets were lashed to some choice bleachers to save spots.

The air was a little crisp, and we knew it would only get colder as the sun went down. I kept a T-shirt under my pads and jersey, but wondered if a long sleeve might be a better idea at halftime.

We stretched, ran through some drills and did a little light hitting before Coach called us back to the locker room for his last minute instructions.

The mood was quiet again inside, some of us rolling our eyes at how our upperclassmen demanded this zen state. Coach Harvey gave one last inspired speech about giving it to Central on our Homecoming. “On our turf” he said as we headed out onto the field with a bit more inspiration.

We gathered behind the bleachers and we could see it was a full house, with many people ringing the fence around the track surrounding our football field, plus the visiting bleachers were jam-packed. There had to be four-to-five thousand people there, an impressive number in our small farm communities.

The cheerleaders manned a big paper wall with a wolf logo, and our captains burst through it with a run onto the field. The band played, the crowd went nuts and sophomores like me went through what was left of the paper wall last.

A little more running and stretching happened before we lined up on the sideline for the National Anthem, played by the band. I made eye contact with Autumn and Lea in the stands. Autumn knew my question without words and gave an exaggerated shrug and a shake of her head.

Then it was kickoff time.

We won the toss and still chose to kick, letting our defense set the tone. I took a position along the sideline next to Beast and Mikey. We watched as our varsity defense allowed a long run on the first play, then buckled down and forced them to punt.

We let the punt bounce into the endzone and took it at the 20 yard line. Mark Carter led the offense onto the field, and he started the game with a fake handoff boot and tucked the ball for a nifty 23-yard run to the delight of the home crowd.

Next play, he handed off to Troy Bartz on a counter and Bartz scampered to the sideline for another first down.

Things were looking really good, as Troy took the next handoff up the middle for another good gain, but not quite a first down. On second and short, Mitch faked a handoff and dropped to pass, hitting a wide open receiver for a 37-yard touchdown.

We rarely passed the ball, and this was like watching an NFL offense go to work. Our crowd went insane. Howls rang out and the band played our fight song. The cheerleaders kicked, danced and waved their pom poms. Mark faked another handoff and sprinted out to complete the two-point conversion, and just like that we were up 8-0. It was good to be a part of the Wolfpack.

I scanned the crowd again, making eye contact with Autumn. Still nothing. We kicked off, and it sailed wide and bounced out of bounds. That set Central up at the 35.

We watched as they got something going with a couple of quick passes, their quarterback gaining confidence. It was much like their plan of attack with the JV team on Monday. They were going to try to pass the ball.

On a third and long, their quarterback went back to pass, scanned the field and found nothing to his liking. He tucked the ball under pressure and scooted up the middle for more than 20 yards. It was bitterly disappointing as we had them in our sights. Now deep in our territory, a sweep toss gave them nine yards and a penalty for a late hit out of bounds gave them first and goal at the two.

They tried to run their fullback up the middle, but he was stoned at the line of scrimmage for no gain. Our crowd was making a lot of noise. Second down was a pass attempt that went over the receivers hands at the back of the end zone.

Another pass attempt on third down bounced off the tight end’s hands, but Central got new life on a holding penalty on our cornerback.

It was first and goal inside the one. They went double tight and tried to punch it in again, only to have their fullback lose a yard this time, as he bounced off the center and tried to spin. He was stopped in the backfield.

Second and goal was another pass attempt. Their quarterback rolled right and fired at an open receiver who jumped to catch the pass but got knocked out of bounds before he could put a foot down.

The crowd went quiet as the refs gathered for a conference in the end zone. A lengthy discussion took place before the umpire gave the signal. Two hands in the air signaled a touchdown for Central. Their crowd went nuts as ours yelled in anger. Coach Harvey was livid over the call, demanding an explanation from our sideline. A side judge explained the call to him, and he didn’t take it well.

Central lined up for the extra point. They had a tall, gangly kicker who tried for one. The kick was low and to the left. That made it 8-6 with two minutes left in the first quarter.

The sun was setting as we took the kickoff. Troy Bartz handled it and set the crowd on fire with a runback to their 33, the kicker saving Central from disaster.

Troy was a bit winded after the kick, and took a play off. No matter, Mark took the snap, faked another handoff and spun left for another 15-yard gain. Central was biting hard on our counters and fakes and we were taking advantage. Tory came back into the huddle, and we went into double tight formation. Mark faked a handoff to the fullback, then raced to his left, before connecting with Troy on a short screen right. Troy had nothing but blockers in front of him and he rumbled behind them for an easy score.

Our crowd erupted in cheers and Central’s head coach slammed his clipboard onto the ground in anger.

“AROOOOOOOOO!” our crowd exalted as the band played the Wolfpack fight song.

We lined up for the two-point conversion. Mark took the snap and ran an option to the right. He pitched it to Troy, who mishandled the pitch and had to fall on it for no gain. That made it 14-6 as the first quarter expired.

We switched endzones, and kicked off, this one sailing to the 15. They ran it back just a few yards and we had them pinned just inside the 20. Two pass attempts failed, then on third and 10, another incomplete pass turned into a first down on a roughing the passer call, that seemed very iffy from our sideline. The crowd was letting the zebras have it as they lined up at the 33. On the next play, their quarterback went back to pass, firing at his flanker on a short out pattern. Our outside linebacker, Jeff Roberts, had seen it enough times to react, and he stepped in front of the pass and caught it at thigh level.

“OSKY!” we could hear our defense yelling out.

The junior sprinted uncontested to the end zone for a Wolfpack touchdown that seemed like it would turn this game on its head.

Our crowd went wild. I’d never heard our home crowd louder as our defense gathered for high fives and ran off the field as our offense came out for the two-point conversion.

Mark made a quick pitch left to Troy, who got tackled at the sideline, the pylon knocked over in the effort. Another short conference of officials set the crowd into a lather as they broke up and the umpire signaled the failed conversion. That made it 20-6, but even a good lead didn’t mean our crowd was going to let up on these officials.

I peeked into the stands again, only to get a sad look from Autumn. I felt a little bad that our Spirit Week award winner wasn’t enjoying the Homecoming game to her fullest due to what had happened the night before. Still, it was good to know she was in my corner.

Our kick stayed in bounds again, but was gathered up just inside the 30. That made for a 17-yard return to near mid-field. Central went back to the run, using their own sweep for a 12-yard pickup. Their quarterback went back for a pass, avoided a sure sack and rolled right before finding an open man for another big gain. Their crowd was at full throat now, and ours less so, even with the early lead.

Inside our 30, they tried to go up the middle for no gain yet again. On the next play, a fake handoff led to another first down pass, with a quick shot to the tight end over the middle. I couldn’t help but wonder if I could stuffed that play, or come up with the ball. On third and two, a run to the right was stuffed short of the first down.

Central called a timeout to consider their options. With their offense on the sideline, they ran back out after the timeout and lined up to kick it.

“WATCH THE FAKE!” Coach Harvey screamed out.

It wasn’t a fake. Their tall kicker booted it through and that made it 20-9 with less than five minutes left in the half.

Central smartly squib kicked on the kickoff, leaving Troy no chance to return it as the ball bounced around instead of sailing through the air. Ryan Meeder picked it up and ran it for seven yards, and I was pleased to see my baseball teammate get some recognition.

From our own 33, Mark handed off to Troy on a draw play that went nowhere. Then Mark kept the ball on an option to the right for three yards. On third and seven, He dumped off the ball to Troy on a screen that left us a yard short of a first down.

Coach Harvey called his own timeout and gathered the offense at the sideline. Mark and Troy were lobbying for Coach to go for it. Cooler heads prevailed, and we punted it, but the punt was shanked pretty short, giving Central the ball just on our side of the 50 as it sailed out of bounds. Coach was livid with the spot as well.

Central had 3:27 to work with, and set out to fling the ball around. On first down, their quarterback went back to pass, but found himself quickly taken down for a sack. Our crowd erupted once again, as the band played loud.