Chapter 6

THURSDAY, SEPTEMBER 12, 1991

“And homegrown and down-home, that makes one
Cookin’ up that old time, long lost recipe for me, woh
It’s gettin’ hard to find
Guess it ain’t hip enough now
You take an average guy, he can’t identify, uh
And there’s a short supply of her fine, fine stuff

Lemme get on, lemme get on, lemme get on some of that
Shake it up, bake it up nice, uh

Lemme get on, lemme get on, lemme get on all that
I so love my baby’s poundcake.”

Van Halen was so much better with Sammy Hagar, don’t you think? What a way to wake up.

I let the song finish and turned my alarm clock off. Jen’s pound cake was very much on my mind. The tight jeans she’d been wearing the last few days were also setting me off.

Lemme get on some of that, indeed. No one else was occupying my dirty thoughts. I thought that might be a good sign.

A plan that I’d almost forgotten about popped into my head just before I picked Mikey up on the way to school.

“Hey, you don’t have a Homecoming date, do you?” I asked as he buckled his seat belt.

“Dude, is it getting that bad that you’re asking me to go with you?”

“Hilarious,” I deadpanned, shifting into first as I drove away from his house.

“No, I don’t have a date. Will you be wearing the dress, or should I?” he smirked.

I wondered if it was going to be like this with all of the guys. I rolled my eyes and sighed in exasperation.

“I guess I can find other guys to go with these girls,” I said flatly.

“Wait, dude, what girls?

“Oh, just five hot girls from County Central that want to get into the Homecoming dance. I’m supposed to find dates to get them in.”

“Why didn’t you just say so?” he complained.

“I’m sure you wouldn’t be interested.” I teased.

“I’m in!” he said quickly. “Well, wait, what’s the catch?”

I just laughed at him and shook my head.

“There’s no catch. I even have a guarantee that you’ll get at least one dance. More if you’re smooth; for once in your life,” I snickered.

“OK, which girls? Anyone I know?”

“Does it matter?” I chuckled. “I really don’t think you’re going to be disappointed.”

“No, I guess I just wanted to know,” he shrugged.

“I have one of them in mind for you. You’ve already met her. Dress up a bit, but not over-the-top. I’ll coordinate after the game and we’ll meet them on the way in. Remember, you’re only guaranteed one dance. She doesn’t have to spend any time with you otherwise.”

“I got it,” he nodded. “I can handle it.”

“We’ll see,” I grinned.

One down, four to go.

At lunch, something big happened. The whole gang was back together once again.

Shelby must have talked her crew into joining us at the long table. She sat with Chris, of course, and unfortunately that meant Vernon was back, and he’d brought that very short and snotty new kid with him. The twins were back, as well as Rachael Hudson, who was happy to be reunited with Autumn and Lea.

Jen and I were back to flirting lightly and getting along as friends once again. At one point, Beast tracked us back and forth with his face like he was watching a tennis match. Everyone laughed at his antics.

“Should I?” Mikey asked Beast.

“I think it’s past time,” Beast nodded sagely.

“Get a room!” Mikey complained to peals of laughter from the table.

Jen blushed bright red and dug a fork into her taco salad.

I just shrugged.

“Not yet,” I quipped.

I tracked down Beast on the way out to the practice fields and clued him in on the plan as we carried our helmets out for practice.

“Remember Cora Deetz?”

“Yeah, why?”

“Molly Storz has conned me into getting five County Central girls into our Homecoming dance.”

“And you want me to get her in?” he asked.

“This is even easier than I thought it would be,” I grinned.

“How do you know I don’t have a date already?” Beast asked in mild amusement.

“I guess I don’t know. But if you don’t have a date, can you help a guy out?”

“Oh, I could be sweet-talked into it,” Beast grinned.

“It’s Cora. She’s hot,” I shrugged. “You want to get her in or not?”

“Calm down. I’ll do it,” he agreed mirthfully.

That left three.

Thursday night meant a joint practice with the varsity squad. They’d do a walk-through, then sometimes use us for the two-minute drill.

As we stood watching the varsity practice, I sidled up to Tree.

“When’s the last time you talked to Shannon DeJong?”

Tree looked at me in confusion for a moment, then it dawned on him.

“OH! I forgot her last name!” he said in surprise. “Yeah, not since the night of the party at Stacey’s.”

“Really?” I asked. “Why not?”

“Well, she never gave me her number,” he shrugged.

“Are you still interested in her?”

“I suppose,” he shrugged without much conviction. “Why?”

“Well, I’ve been conned into getting five girls into the Homecoming Dance.”

“Five?” he asked incredulously. “FIVE?”

“Keep it down, idiot!” I swore under my breath. “Yeah, five.”

“You suck!” he complained.

“And you can help. It’s not like I can get all five in.”

“No,” he shook his head. “But if anyone could...”

“No,” I cut him off. “I need help. Are you in?”

“Shannon, huh?”

“Yeah, Shannon.”

“I’ll do it,” he agreed with a smile.

That left two.

Right out of the shower, I caught Kronk at his locker.

I was in a towel. Kronk was, as usual, just strutting around in the buff, his hair slicked back.

“Hey, I’ve got an offer for you.”

“What’s that, Jake?”

“I need to get a girl into the Homecoming Dance, can you be her date?”

“Anyone I know?”

“I don’t think so. She goes to Central.”

“What’s she look like?”

I tilted my head a little as I was thinking Kronk would have been an easy sell.

“Her name’s April. She’s short and blond and she’s stacked,” I held my hands out in front of my chest, miming a big pair of boobs.

“I like the sound of that,” he enthused. “Do I have to pay for her?”

‘Of all the questions,’ I thought.

“It’s five for singles and eight for couples. You’ll actually save a dollar if she pays her own way in,” I said, less-than-impressed with the question.

‘Is she going to be into me?”

“That, I don’t know,” I shook my head. “But she has agreed to at least one dance. Nothing more, nothing less.”

“You think she’s hot?”

“I wouldn’t kick her out of the bed for eating cookies,” I nudged him in the arm, before remembering that the guy was totally naked.

“If you think she’s hot, that’s good enough for me,” he nodded. “I’ll do it.”

“All right,” I nodded. “Dress up just a little, but don’t go overboard.”

“I’ll wear my jeans with the fewest holes,” he offered helpfully.

I knew I still had my work cut out for me. I sighed and thanked him.

That left one.

It wasn’t quite cold enough for chili, but Mom made it for supper anyway. I scarfed down three bowls loaded with cheese, Fritos and sour cream.

“Where are you putting all that?” Dad asked in amusement.

“He’s a growing boy,” Mom sighed. “Let him eat.”

“Too bad we can’t get Josh to eat like his big brother,” Dad complained.

Josh had picked his way around the beans, making a face most of the meal.

“Don’t you like chili?” I asked my little brother.

“I don’t like the beeeeanssss,” he whined.

“Buddy, that’s where farts come from,” I nodded with a grin.

“Really?” he brightened.

“Jake!” Mom denounced me harshly. “Inappropriate!”

I doubled down, giving mom a lopsided grin.

“They’re the musical fruit, buddy. Eat up!”

Josh looked at me, then his beans, then me again.

Dad chuckled lightly.

“Beans, beans, the musical fruit. The more you eat, the more you toot,” Dad sang.

“Johnathan!” Mom yelled, then stifled a giggle.

Josh was rolling with laughter, then started repeating it.

“Beans, beans! The musical fruit!” he sang, then plopped a spoonful of them in his mouth, cheerfully munching away.

“See, it works,” Dad said smugly.

Mom just laughed lightly and shrugged in defeat.

“See what you started?” she accused me.

I smiled around my spoon, taking a final bite of my own chili and shrugged at her.

“Hey Jake?” little Josh asked sagely.

“What, buddy?”

“How long do they take to work?”

The three of us burst into laughter at him.

I heard my teen line ringing just after supper, so I ran to my room and picked it up.

“Hello?”

“Hi Jake,” a sultry, and slightly raspy voice answered back.

“Hi Molly,” I said brightly.

“You’re in good spirits,” she enthused. “Is that good or bad.”

“It’s pretty good,” I admitted. “What can I do for you?”

“I was wondering if you’d made any progress on our little arrangement?”

“Our little arrangement?” I asked incredulously.

“Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten?” she asked.

“I haven’t forgotten,” I said slyly. “In fact, I’ve laid the groundwork for almost all of you.”

“Almost?” she asked airily.

“Everyone but you is accounted for,” I said flatly.

“Saving the best for last?” she cooed.

“I suppose I am,” I admitted.

“I’m your Plan B, aren’t I?” she asked smugly. “You still don’t have a date.”

“I don’t,” I admitted.

“I already knew,” she teased. “I’m ALL-knowing,” she said mysteriously.

“You hear everything from Stacey, who hears it from Mandy,” I said flatly.

“Why do you have to take all the fun out of it?” she complained with a laugh.

“Say ‘hi’ to Stacey for me,” I joked.

“Speaking of Stacey, who’s she going in with?”

“Does it matter?” I asked in exasperation.

“Well, sort of,” she admitted. “You only get one chance to make an entrance,” she added theatrically.

“You’ll find out next Friday night,” I teased. “Not so, ALL-knowing now, are you?”

“OH, you’re such a tease,” she complained.

“Beggars can’t be choosers,” I said flatly. “I’m getting you girls in. That’s all that matters.”

“True,” she admitted. “Still, you don’t have a date for me.”

“I told you. If I don’t have a date, I’m taking you in.”

“What if something changes?” she asked dubiously.

“I’ll figure it out,” I chuckled.

“Who’s this girl you’re waiting on?”

“You don’t already know?” I teased.

“Yes, yes. Tall, athletic blond. Booooring,” she tutted.

I laughed at her obvious jealousy. “Sorry, I like her.”

“Don’t you like me?”

“I hardly know you,” I hedged. “But sure.”

“Well, when you’re tired of waiting on ‘Barbie,’ you know where you can find me.”

“Yeah, I guess,” I said flatly.

“Is it such a horrible thought?” she teased.

“No, no. I’m sorry. There’s nothing wrong with you.”

“High praise,” she said flatly.

“I’m sorry. I don’t mean it that way. Look, you’re gorgeous. You know that. It’s just that I have my heart set on Jen and I really want to date her.”

“Date? Oh, I see,” she suddenly understood. “It’s serious then.”

“Yeah?” I wondered out loud to her. “Did you think it wasn’t?”

“You have a certain, uh, reputation, Jake,” she said warmly. “You’re kind of a sure thing.”

“Every guy is a sure thing,” I laughed.

“You’d think so,” she said in exasperation. “But it’s not the case.”

“Maybe you intimidate them a bit?” I offered.

“You’re not intimidated, are you, Jake?” she asked breathily.

“Why would I be intimidated?”

“You’ve never been with a girl like me,” she said boldly.

I chuckled thinking back to Mel and every wild thing she would want us to try.

“Molly, you’re definitely one of a kind, but there isn’t much you could surprise me with,” I said confidently.

“We’ll have to see,” she purred.

“You may just get your chance,” I agreed.

“Mmmm, I can’t wait,” she said softly. “G-night, Jake.”

“Good night Molly.”

There was that discomfort all over again.

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 13, 1991

“I’m a cold heartbreaker Fit ta burn and I’ll rip your heart in two And I’ll leave you lyin’ on the bed I’ll be out the door before you wake It’s nuthin’ new to you ‘Cause I think we’ve seen that movie too

‘Cause you could be mine But you’re way out of line With your bitch slap rappin’ And your cocaine tongue You get nuthin’ done I said you could be mine”

What a brutal way to wake up. I slept very poorly. At least at first. Once I finally took matters into my own hands and found relief, I slept much better.

Of course, I felt bad thinking about a lap dance from Molly to a climax.

“Tell me about this girl?” Mikey inquired moments after he closed the car door.

“What girl?” I asked coyly.

“Dude, you know what I’m talking about,” he complained.

“What do you want to know?”

“Who is she?”

“Why do you need to know?” I grinned.

“I just do. Tell me!”

“Why is this so important to you?”

“Dude, I’m asking the questions,” he complained.

“And I’m not answering. It’s a week away, so quit stressing about it,” I shrugged. “You’re just going to get too worked up over it, so I’m going to let it be a surprise.”

“Is it one of the girls we met at the pizza place?”

“Yep,” I confirmed, looking straight forward as I kept driving.

“Which one?”

“The hot one,” I answered mirthfully.

“Dude! They’re both smokin’ hot.”

“Right, so why are you worried about it?”

“I just want to know.”

“You’ll find out in a week,” I said flatly, hoping to end the line of questioning.

Mikey groaned in exasperation and seemed to give up.

I just grinned and kept driving to school.

Friday was an obvious reminder that Homecoming was a week away. The cheerleaders were in full gear, handing out flyers again. Even verbally reminding us of the fundraiser on Tuesday. The cheerleaders had togas ready for a cash rental. It had become a tradition and a cool way to raise money for the team.

“You’re going to wear a toga Tuesday, right Jacob?”

Lexie had taken a quick step to intercept me from in front of Mikey, shoving a flyer into my chest.

“Wouldn’t miss it,” I said half-heartedly.

“Where’s your school spirit?” she tutted me. “It’s for the best cause.”

“I’ll do it,” I complained lightly, hoping to get past her.

Things had been tough enough without Lexie meddling in my life. Her relationship with Troy Bartz had largely kept her busy enough with the senior crowd that she was practically absent from our social circles. I didn’t mind one bit.

“Hey. I’ll take one of those,” Mikey asked brazenly.

“Of course you will,” Lexie said dismissively, handing him a flyer without making eye contact with him.

“Dude, she’s such a bitch,” Mikey complained under his breath as we resumed our walk to our lockers. Of course, he didn’t say it loud enough for anyone else to hear.

“She can be cold,” I agreed. “She can be manipulative,” I added. “But I’ve always wondered why.”

“Who knows?” Mikey shrugged, popping his locker open.

I left him to it and headed up the hallway to my locker.

Kim Nguyen was rifling through her locker as I approached mine. She caught my eye and visibly stiffened as I our eyes locked, turning her gaze back to her locker.

I felt bad about the situation and wondered if trying to talk to her might help.

“Hi, Kim,” I took a chance, giving her a warm smile.

She stood stiffly at her locker for a moment, locking eyes with me before turning her head quickly in shame. She clutched her Algebra book to her chest and took a few quick steps to get well around me, then walked briskly up the hallway without looking back.

I guess that wasn’t the right thing to do. I wondered once again if I would ever understand girls.

It was Chicken Nugget Friday. It was one of my favorite school lunches. This one would come with mashed potatoes and the usual half slices of buttered bread sandwiches. We’d ingeniously create nugget and mashed potato sandwiches and wolf them down greedily. It was one of the quieter meals at the table.

But Jen and I still had time to chat and, of course, flirt lightly.

She raised an eyebrow at our odd sandwich making but shrugged and assembled one of her own. She admitted it was pretty good too.

The dynamic had changed a little as more people crowded around the table. It was good to see Shelby back and interacting with everyone.

She and Chris seemed to be happy, and I didn’t mind at all.

Study Hall found us a little busier with homework. No one wants to bring any home on a weekend. Still, Jen and I found a little time to talk quietly. Beast, of course, tried to look busy as he listened in. He wasn’t alone, as Lea would pretend to read her book and smile at little jokes I’d make just to Jen.

My cousin Natalie and Julie Anders intercepted me on my way to P.E.

“Hey cuz,” Natalie teased, bumping into me.

“Hi,” I said, rolling my eyes with a smirk.

“Hi, Jake,” Julie chimed in, her smile nearly pinching her pretty eyes closed.

“Sooooo,” Natalie drew it out. “I hear you don’t have a date for Homecoming?”

I could tell just where this was going, but decided to be as kind as I possibly could.

“Nope,” I sighed. “Gonna have to go stag.”

“Well, you don’t have to do that,” Natalie shook her head.

“No?” I smiled.

“Take Julie here,” Natalie waved theatrically at the girl wearing a red V-neck sweater.

Julie took a step forward and gave me a hopeful smile.

“I asked Jennifer,” the short, cute blond summoned the courage to say. “She said it was OK.”

“Did she now?”

I took a step closer to the short girl and took both of her little hands in mine.

“I still have my heart set on going with Jen, but if she doesn’t go, I promise I’ll save you a dance.”

I watched Julie’s gorgeous face go through a couple of emotions rather quickly, before settling on a big smile. If nothing else, I did promise her a dance.