Chapter 3 - In which I lay out my plan

In which i lay out my plan I confess I have many faults, but stupidity isn’t one of them. While I freely admit to being something of a narcissistic nihilist with very little respect for the autonomy of other sentient beings, I’m not so na•ve as to use my new-found powers in a manner that would draw too much attention. Obviously, various government agencies will be aware that NanoRep technology has been invented, and they will have some form of plan in place for detecting its use against members of the higher echelons of society. He who invents a powerful new weapon had better make plans for when his enemies gets hold of it and uses it against him.

I knew I had to keep a low profile, stay in the shadows, be inconspicuous. I must think long and hard about what I wanted, and come up with a good plan for how to get it while drawing as little attention to myself as possible.

So what do I actually want, when it comes right down to it? Have you ever asked yourself that? It’s a question with many subtle nuances. I want to eat pizza or tacos every day, yet I want to feel fit and healthy. I want to be in a consistent hypo-manic state of positive flow and creativity, but at the same time I want to keep my wits about me and be able to focus. What someone wants and what they need aren’t necessarily the same. Everything needs to be balanced. It’s just that the balance we’re biologically programmed to maintain - homeostasis - isn’t necessarily the most pleasurable state. Darwinian life doesn’t care about our well-being, only our ability to reproduce.

What do I want, when it comes right down to it? I want to maximise pleasure. My own pleasure, first and foremost, but I’m actually not a cruel person; I also want others to experience pleasure. I can get off on making someone suffer, but I often feel guilt-ridden after. As I’m writing this, the young girl who just spent hours fellating me and climaxed just as I came has fallen asleep, contentedly curled up under a blanket beside my desk. Her brain was nearly overloaded with the intensity of her whole-body orgasm, and in her quivering, blissful post-orgasmic state, she didn’t have the energy to crawl over to the sofa at the other side of the room. While I’ve robbed her of a part of her autonomy, her new life as my companion and sex-toy is certainly not without pleasure.

Quite the opposite, as a matter of fact.

I suppose I ought to comment on the fact that my sexual appetites aren’t entirely in line with mainstream morality. The girl who just spent hours giving me head is fourteen or fifteen years old.

I’ve always liked girls in their puberty. A fresh young face, a lean and petite body, a freshly shaved pussy, budding young breasts - these are my pleasures in life. Not children, mind you. I’m not a pedophile. The word to use is actually ‘hebephile’; I like teens in puberty.

So what I needed to do, now that I had proof of concept that my neural interface was going to work, was to establish that it would actually work in humans, not just on cats. Then when I knew it worked in humans, I could use it to become rich and start building a truly pleasurable life for myself. I could infect people who had financial resources, make them transfer funds to me, and then persuade them to forget all about it. Or maybe just walk into a bank one day and no, even better - I could make a banker go inside and fetch me the funds. Shut off the security cameras and alarms, and then this was going to work out just fine. The possibilities were nearly endless. I just had to keep my wits about me and be subtle. Stay under the radar. Maybe even go into stealth mode and fake my own death. Yes. That was it.

But first, I needed to establish that the interface would give me control over humans. We are, after all, a good bit more complicated than cats. Maybe it wouldn’t be possible to override the controls of human consciousness?