Chapter 1: First Steps

Amanda’s diary:

Dear diary,

Today Fiona talked to me. Not just to say hi, either. I had nowhere to sit and she invited me to her table, with the track team. She looks so pretty. I was stammering at first, but we had a nice chat about the school and everything. She even smiled at me! Ok, it probably doesn’t mean anything other than she’s nice, but it sure felt good.

She’s invited me to go to her place for the weekend, too. She said she wants to get to know me better. Some of her teammates were snickering about that, so I wonder if she’s into girls like I am. I mean, that would just be too good, you know? Still, a girl can dream, and she’s sure dreamy...

She’s picking me up on Friday evening after her training. This week is going to pass so slowly ... But at least I have something to look forward to at the end, and through her I should be able to get to know some new people. Changing schools is hard.

Mum and dad are ok with me going. They can be so difficult sometimes, but even they realise I need to make new friends here. I think they feel a bit guilty about the move, though I know they had no real choice about it. Still, I wouldn’t mind having a bit more freedom, so it’s not all bad.

Dear diary,

Wow! Fiona’s just amazing!

Ok, she did get my name wrong at first, but that’s fine. Nobody’s perfect. I waited for her training to finish at school on Friday and she took me to her place. She lives at a pretty nice house, and we got it all to ourselves, too, because her parents were away to some sort of event. She didn’t sound too happy about it, but really, I’m glad I got to know her without having to deal with her parents, too. Though it’s gone pretty well so I’m sure I’ll meet them eventually.

She trains so hard. She was completely covered in sweat when she finished running. Oddly she didn’t immediately take a shower but she said she’d rather get home as soon as possible, so I got in her car and she drove us there. I don’t know if she pushes herself so hard every time, but I could see she badly needed a rest. When we got to her place she gave me a little tour, we left my things in her room, and then she just sat down on the living room sofa. I asked her if she needed anything and she said she would love a foot rub. I must have blushed because she started laughing, but she said she was really tired, and if I brought her a glass of water and a sandwich she’d be really grateful.

I went to the kitchen to get her water and make her a sandwich, and heard her turn the TV on. When I came back, she smiled at me, thanked me, and told me she really appreciated it. It made me feel warm inside and I just stammered about her being so tired and me being there for whatever she needed. She was very sweet and didn’t even laugh at me. I’m so silly sometimes. I wish I were cooler.

She drank the whole glass, and sent me for more while she ate her sandwich. I guess she needed to recover from sweating so much. I sat on one corner of the sofa, and when she finished the sandwich she took off her sneakers and lay down with her feet a hair’s breadth from my leg. It may have been my imagination, but I could even feel the warmth they radiated. I noticed their smell filling the room, but I was too polite to say anything, and oddly I wasn’t finding it unpleasant, somehow.

Now and then I would catch myself looking at her feet. They’re not much longer than mine, but give off this, I don’t know, aura of power. Her socks looked quite damp with sweat (drenched, to be honest) and worn out. I wish I could touch them without it being weird, but the last thing I wanted is for Fiona to learn my secret and stop being my friend. She must have noticed I was looking though, because she asked me if her feet were bothering me, and I had to reassure her that I didn’t mind. She apologised for the smell, but she said it was the price for training at her best, and I told her it wasn’t a problem, which made her giggle. Please, let her not have realised.

We watched TV for a while, and talked about everything: my old school and how hard it was to move, my difficulties getting to know people and making friends, her love of running and playing football, and a few stories about her friends. I got the feeling she doesn’t think so well of some of them. That’s when she told me that she likes girls, and I was a little surprised, both that she’d tell me so soon and that my hopes were not completely impossible. Of course, that she likes girls doesn’t mean she’s going to want to be my girlfriend, but still, that’s something, isn’t it? I wanted to tell her I like girls too, but I was afraid it would look like I was coming onto her, so I just made it clear I found that cool.

At some point she realised it was getting late and asked me if I was ok with pizza, or wanted us to cook something. I am a pretty good cook, but I love pizza, so she ordered one, and I could see her begin to get her energy back. She got up and took a shower while I waited for the delivery. She made sure to leave me some money in case it came while she was away, but she made it before the pizza did.

She looked so nice after the shower, with her long dark hair loose. She put on comfortable home clothes, and I decided it was a good idea so I got mine out and did the same. We had dinner, and went to her room. She showed me some of her track and football awards and pictures taken with her friends, and I showed her stuff from my previous school on my phone. We lay down together on her bed, chatting and giggling, but it was obvious she was tired, so we slept pretty early. I felt her cuddling me, holding me in place, and though it made me a bit uncomfortable and awkward, I didn’t want to disturb her, so I just let her do it and closed my eyes.

Fiona’s diary:

I was having lunch when I saw this lost little nerd trying to look for a place. We had a free seat and she’s new to the school, so I invited her to join, and she looked so grateful. I’d seen her around before, and I thought it could be fun to make her my project. Honestly, some people are so shy it almost seems like they’re puppies waiting to be kicked. Still, she’s alright once she unwinds a bit. She even managed to talk to us while we ate and it was fun. I’ve invited her home for the weekend, too. Shy mousy girls get to me.

She’s so small and quiet, it makes me want to take care of her, somehow. I think she needs a good friend, and I can always do with one myself. A lot of my teammates and the popular girls are just looking out for themselves. Knowing someone I can really trust would be nice for a change. There’s a lot I have to keep to myself, or write down in here, because I’ve no-one to talk to. As it is, they already make fun of me for liking girls, though they have to keep it down or I will fuck them up. I bet she wouldn’t do that. Anyway, it’s not the first stray I’ve taken home.