Part 73: CELTEST

The Devastator had excellent recreational facilities and offered something for almost any taste, but the most liked recreation area was called The Village. It was a small down town area complete with shops, cafés, micro breweries, night-clubs, restaurants, Virtu-show halls and theatres. The sky appeared real with moving clouds and a warm yellow sun. It would even rain or snow once in a while. The Village centered on a park with grass, trees, flower patches and narrow duro-crete walking paths. The park featured picnic areas, offered a wide variety of out-door sport facilities and had a large lake in the middle for swimming and paddling around in small boats.

We had settled down at one of the picnic areas next to a big oak tree, and close to the shore of the lake. Elfi wore a golden bathing suit that was so tight it appeared as if it was painted to her body. Wetmouth had on a pink bikini, that revealed her perfectly curved body and her top barley covered a pair of firm looking breasts. The French cut bottom of her bikini made her lissome legs appear even longer than they were.

Mao, Shaka and me wore black swimming trunks. Hans was wearing a hideous patterned shirt that would have been big enough to serve as a tent for the rest of us to a pair of tan colored shorts, revealing his massive calves to the world. The Saturnian was standing at a BBQ grill and the smoke he produced smelled deliciously of seared meat.

Krabbel only wore uniform when on duty was all his hairy self and hung from the tree on an almost invisible string of spider silk and holding four ice cream cones at the same time.

Elfi just returned from a swim was a sight to see as she took of the bathing cap, shook loose her precious shimmering hair and begun to dry her legs with a fluffy towel.

Circuit did not wear anything, but then he did not have anything that needed to be hidden. He was lying on his towel and then propped himself up and looked over the lake. “I wish I could swim. It looks like a lot of fun.”

Har Hi was the only one of us who was completely dressed and he wore his usual red Dai leathers. He grunted. “Swimming isn’t fun.”

I turned to Circuit and had to shield my eyes as his chrome metal body reflected the sun like a mirror and asked. “Why don’t you try it?”

“Because I am too dense. I don’t float, no matter how much I paddle. I usually walk along the bottom.”

Mao who had disappeared for a while came back with a colorful box and he hollered. “They made it. It’s done! Oh I love to see your face Krabbel.”

Elfi looked interested and teased the Arachnoid saying.” Krabbel does not have a face, just lots of eyes and fangs.”

“I do have a face and a very handsome one if I might add. If I wanted too, I could be on the cover of magazines.”

Elfi smiled. “Really?”

“Oh yes only last year a Terran company that makes some sort of Insect killer wanted me for their commercials. And there was this magazine called Goosebumps who offered me to appear on a title page, why they wanted me to carry a naked woman in my fangs I could not say.”

We all laughed as we all knew Krabbel’s brand of humor. He delivered his jokes with a dead serious tone in his voice, but only halfway through then he barely was able to suppress his laughter. I realized how well I was able to read the emotions of a being that by all accounts should have been terrifying.

Mao handed the box to Krabbel. “Here you go, happy Nuflug Day to you.”

Mao stripped off his shirt and revealed his tattoos that covered most of his right arm and right torso. Still talking to Krabbel he added. “And your mother told me to make sure you brush your chelicerae and not skip it as usual. She expects you to call if you can and wanted you to know that your dad and she are very proud of you.”

Krabbel took the package and started to unwrap it, while he was doing it I asked Mao.

“You know Krabbel’s mother?”

He nodded. “Oh sure, I spend some time with Krabbel on Archa before we joined the Academy together. I have been there again after the second year. I tell you those Archas do not believe in ladders or stairs anywhere.”

We laughed and Krabbel managed to tear the box open and held a strange orange plastic device with dark lenses into the sun.

“What is that?” Elfi asked.

Krabbel put it on his head and said with a happy tone. “Those are sun-gasses of course. These are the first Arachnoid sunglasses. Circuit designed them and Mao and I are going to mass-produce them and become rich one day.”

“Sun glasses?” Was all I could say.

“Have you ever seen a Terran without sunglasses? “ Mao asked. If you see sunglasses he or she is from the Sol system. If you want to be on top of what is in fashion you got to follow the Terran example.”

I shrugged. “Shaka doesn’t wear them and he is from Earth.”

Shaka heard his name and sat up, pointing at a pair of dark glasses he had shoved into his hair. “Because you hardly ever see me out of Uniform, I got sunglasses right here.”

Instead of lying back down, Shaka looked towards Mao and asked “How is it on Archa?”

Mao plopped himself down right next to Elfi and blinked into the sun. “They have the most amazing cities you’ll ever see. They are almost completely hidden in the trees. You don’t even know you are in a big city, while you stand in the middle of one. At least as long as you don’t look up. Their architecture is hard to describe, but their houses look basically like cocoons made of shiny metals and glass. But no stairs I tell you, no ladders. They do have elevators to ride up those gigantic trees, but not for the faint of heart. Little platforms without any railings or anything else to hold onto and then they shoot up and down at great speed some reaching a mile high.”

Krabbel raised his first leg pair. “We have plenty of limbs to hold on, so we never invented railings.”

Mao continued. “The Archas are the friendliest folks you could ever meet. Very competitive lot with lots of sports venues and they can be quite aggressive when competing; they are predators or have evolved from predators after all. What they call Prey Gardens and goes for local restaurants isn’t for the squeamish either, but they started to have normal restaurants where they serve the food already killed.”

“We are getting civilized I tell you.” Krabbel added. “We recently even decided that killing of your sac siblings is perhaps a thing we should change.”

“You kill your own kind?” Elfi asked.

Krabbel made a specific leg move that meant the same as when a human was nodding. “You see a healthy female can lay 2000 eggs or more and ever since we had our industrial revolution we don’t have any natural enemies anymore. We never had any wars among ourselves like the Terrans so if we let all eggs mature it would get crowded very fast. Besides it is an instinctive process when you are very little. I have no recollection how many sac siblings I killed while I crawled to the sac mouth. This way only one, two or sometimes three siblings survive. Mothers made sure it would not be more and ate the rest.

About five or ten years ago we started using fertility control drugs so females produce only two or three eggs in the first place and let them mature.”

We all listened quite fascinated to Krabbel’s account. It was completely different to hear something like this from a friend than absorbing it during an Exobiology lesson.

Krabbel was on a roll and he continued to tell us about Archa. He said. “It was until about hundred years when ago females often killed their male partners at the height of sexual ecstasy and for a male that was the only way to go and the one thing he lived for. Nowadays it happens very rarely and males live long enough to enter political careers.” He pointed at himself as he said. “We look very much like spiders of Terra and Arachnoids of other worlds other worlds and we do have somewhat similar behavior patterns, but we are also very different. See my four upper leg pairs developed claws and on each is an opposing claw or finger if you would, we can manipulate objects much like the human hand can, we developed a language and writing and our digestive tract has evolved so we can now consume more solid foods and not just suck liquefied prey.”

“I think I would like to see Archa one day.” I said.

“Oh I would love to show you all around. My mom would be so happy to have you for company.”

Hans came over holding a huge tray piled with steaks, burgers and hot dogs. “Go get it while their hot, there is more coming.”

“Who you cooking for, the entire ship crew?” Har-Hi asked. Hans shrugged and looked at the platter. “Mostly from me and Krabbel of course but Mao can eat a lot too. So there won’t be much left if we start eating, you better get it first.”

We ate and Krabbel said between two bites. “I really like the idea of fried food. We started cook some food now for over a thousand years but frying and roasting is completely new to us.”

Elfi nibbled at her burger. “How is your home planet Mao?”

“Actually not so very different from the planet we just came from, at least climate wise. We have swamps, lots of jungles and rivers. But we do have oceans and many islands too. When my ancestors left Earth they wanted a world as close to their native home as possible and found it on a planet we call Guayas. Native tribes from Terran regions emigrated to Guayas to be left alone and live the traditional way.”

Mao looked ashamed. “Almost everyone lives basically in stone age conditions. Almost no tech, lots of superstitions and all that.” He looked to the ground. “I grew up in a palm leaf thatched hut mad with mud walls and no doors.”

“Are you ashamed of that?” Wetty asked with surprise in her voice.

“Not among you, but others have looked down on me because of that and I am actually ashamed of my own thoughts and feelings when I returned after my first academy year, it was so small and dirty and so primitive in my eyes.”

Then he looked up and smiled. “I still would like to take you all to meet my Peppy and Mr. Roundtree my Union School teacher. Krabbel was there and he was the first non human Alien anyone alive ever saw. We did get invaded by the Nogoll, but that was long ago.They really liked Krabbel, especially the kids.”

Har-Hi used one of his razor sharp knifes to slice thins trips of his steak and he looked at Wetmouth. “Don’t answer if you don’t want too but I always wondered how a Sojonit ended up in the Navy.”

She sighed under her ever present mask.

“That is a long story.”

She looked at Mao and put her slender hand on his knee. “If anyone should be ashamed of her upbringing it should be me.”

She sighed again and said to Har Hi. “No I don’t mind and I am going to tell you the short version. I don’t know if you all know about Sin 4. It is the most lawless hellhole in the entire Galaxy. Theft, murder and any horrible crime you can imagine happen at every hour, every minute and everywhere. Criminal cartels ruled by big families’ control our world with an iron fist, but only as far as their own interests go. There is a strict caste system enforced by whoever has the most firepower. The lowest class the Skath live in filth and conditions you would not believe possible.

My mother was a Skath and very sick. She put me on a little boat and told me to make my way to the Sojonit Island. I saw her collapse on the shore and torn apart by Heghoor scavengers. I somehow made it and was found on the steps of the Sojonit temple. My mother did the best she could.”

“The best she could,” gasped Elfi,”abandoning her child?”

“You don’t understand Elfi. Sin 4 is not a nice place like your palace or any other place you’ve ever seen. Do you know what real hunger is? Being hungry for most of your life, never having enough to eat and when you eat the food is filthy and stinks. Yet you have to fight to the death to keep it. Skath have no rights, no possessions, they are slaughtered for food, sold for cheap slaves, pressed into hard labor whenever needed, kicked and beaten all day long. If there is a hell, Elfi then the Skath slums of Sin 4 are it. Mothers sell their kids for slaves and yes they sell them for meat. Nothing is sacred and naked survival on the most primitive brutal level is all there is.”

Even I could not help but looked shocked at her.

She continued with a dry voice. “Sin 4 is populated by beings from all over the Galaxy and human meat is just another commodity. So yes I think my mother did the best she could. It was a feat no less to organize the shipping crate that served me as a boat. The Sojonit temple is on an island and not easily accessible for Skath.

There, Mother Superior raised me and I never had to suffer hunger or thirst from then on. While I was trained like any other Sojonit, she saw my gift and made me wear the veil of abstinence early on and gave me all the help to study knowledge.

But the temple, Sin 4 is limited very limited, they have more bordellos and whore houses, casinos and amusement of the worst kind than anywhere else in the Galaxy but there are no schools, no universities. Sojonites travel everywhere where customers can be found that pay for sexual pleasures. Mother Superior arranged for me to leave Sin 4 and reach Union space. I had no money, I was not a citizen and found out I was too young to apply for anything.

I was very lucky then and was adopted by a very kind man and one thing led to the other and I first joined the Science Corps but I wanted to become a Science Officer aboard a ship and that means I have to complete the Academy and become an officer.” She spread her hands. “This is how I ended up in the Fleet.”

Elfi hugged her and while she did she cried and tears pearled down her cheeks. “I am so sorry Wetmouth. I promise you have a home on Saran anytime as my sister.”

Our conversation was interrupted by a voice saying. “Those burgers smell mighty good.”

I turned to see, it was Admiral Stahl and he was carrying a big cardboard box. He was out of uniform and wore the unmarked black jumpsuit, the same kind I had seen him wear the first time I met him.

I jumped up, but he said. “Relax, kids I am out of uniform and so are you. I came to keep my promise to Mr. Krabbel. I brought some real ice cream made from real milk.”Krabbel zipped to the ground and came over in his silent fast way.

Stahl grinned and said. “Why don’t you trade me this ice cream for a burger?” Krabbel took the box. “You got a deal. Hurry guys get the Admiral some meat.”

Stahl sat down just as if was one of us and took a plate from Hans. Har Hi handed him a bottle of soda and Krabbel shrieked.

“Oh by the sac of grandmother, that’s the best kind there is, my favorite, Chocolate dipped soft serve. How did you know, Sir?”

“I am immortal, my eight legged friend I am supposed to be wise beyond human understanding and know everything.” Stahl chuckled while he said that. “Truth to be told, I am not as wise as I wish to be and I am far from knowing everything, so I simply asked Mr. Mao.”

He dug into his steak and praised Hans cooking. “Oh just right, there isn’t anything much better than a flame broiled steak done just right. This is my favorite food”

“You should try the Cattle Baron in Topeka on Wichita planet.” I said.” No place serves a better steak.”

He raised one eyebrow. “Ah yes, you have been to Wichita. The planet used to have a mystery too, before you’ve been there.”

I promised the others to tell them later what he meant and the Admiral said. “You are right, Eric. There is no place that serves better steaks, I have been there. However I think Mr. Neugruber’s steaks are a close second.”

Hans looked very proud and forked another one on the plate of the Immortal.

Stahl chewed and pointed his fork at my holster. “I see you carry the old Springfield Colt.”

“That old piece saved my life and I am glad I developed this habit.”

He made me tell the incident while he finished his steak.

Har Hi took cigars out of his leg pocket, but the Admiral declined and preferred one of Shaka’s cigarettes.

Then he leaned back and gave us all a long look. “It is not just steaks an ice cream that brought me here.”

He took a sip of his soda. “I really enjoyed your company, I must confess. I feel things I haven’t felt in quite a while looking at you princess and having a legendary Sojonit sister in a bikini there as well make me realize I am still just a man and human after all, It is a good realization.”

He sighed. “I also came to tell you that you are most likely going to leave the ship tomorrow.”

Wetmouth covered her bare legs with a towel more instinctively than conscious and said. “Sir we still have six month to go before we hopefully graduate. Would you be willing to inform us where we have erred or not met expectations?”

“You did not do anything wrong and you exceeded expectations in every way, I don’t think this ship ever had such an extraordinary group as yours.

“That is why Captain Harris wants you to go to Newport and compete with other senior cadets for the Reagan trophy.”

He crushed his cigarette. “I am sure Wetmouth knows what I am taking about but let me explain anyway.

There is not just one Naval Academy; there are many branches all over Union space.

We recently opened one across the Bridge in the Andromeda Galaxy and another will open its doors for new recruits on the far end of the LMC later this year.”

He pointed at me. “Mr. Olafson and her majesty the princess were tested, evaluated and accepted at the Academy HQ on Arsenal II.

If my memory serves me right, you Mr. Hi and your Royal Highness Mr. Shaka did the same at Annapolis Earth.”

They both nodded in agreement.

The immortal Admiral continued. “This should illustrate the point I am trying to make, there are several branches, but there is one you may or may not have heard off; it is the Naval Academy College on Newport. Officially designated Advanced Officer training facility Newport, but generally referred to as Newport Academy and it is an advanced school where the best Cadets and Midshipmen are sent to complete their officers training.”

I rolled my eyes. “I have heard of it alright and met a few who studied there as well.”

“Yes you have, Commander Letsgo told me about your adventure.” Stahl nodded his head and motioned me to tell the others about my Duel I fought against the fencing instructor of Newport.

Har Hi laughed. “You really do get mixed up in situations more than others so it appears.”

Stahl lost much of his stern, immortal looks as he suddenly grinned widely and appeared very human. “That is putting it mildly and he left out the part of the story were he stripped poor Master Milieu naked in front of everyone. Frankly part of the reason I am sitting here with you is because in all my long life I have not met quite a group like yours, even though I was partially responsible for all of you ending up on the Devi and on the same team.”

He became serious again and lost most of his smile but some of it kept lingering in the corner of his grey eyes. “Anyway back to what I am trying to explain to you. Every four years there is a traditional challenge called the Newport Challenge, they invite senior teams from all over the Fleet to Newport for a competition. A test of all skills and knowledge future Officers supposed to have and the winning team gets the Reagan Trophy, an ugly metal bowl and the bragging rights to be the very best. The award is a team prize and goes to the ship or academy of the winning team.”

No one of us wanted to interrupt him, except for Krabbel who tried to manage to eat his fifth, now melting ice cream cone without dripping to much of it on Mao’s back who more or less sat right below the spider. Krabbel whispered a shy. “Sorry.” That caused Stahl to interrupt his narration to toss him a napkin and then while he tried to fight a new grin coming over his lips he went on.

“They do that more or less to proof to everyone just how good they are at Newport and for the last 30 years only Newport won the trophy. I don’t like Newport and between you and me I don’t like Admiral Dent who runs the College. Your former special friend Lt. Clusen was a graduate of Newport and that should illustrate best how they act. I don’t like this kind of elite breeding. I prefer earned excellence while doing a real job over this Ivy League, ivory tower elite attitude they indoctrinate their graduates with. I didn’t like it when I was a Cadet so long ago at Quantico and had to deal with holier than thou cadets from a place called West Point and I don’t like it now.

“But they produce results and no one seems to be able to beat them. Captain Harris was kicked out of Newport and told he would never amount to anything. So it won’t surprise you when I tell you he has an even greater dislike for that place.

It was him who basically begged me to agree to send you to Newport this year, represent the Devi.”

He raised both his hands. “Now in reflection of your recent ordeal on Quagmire Bog, I refused to order you there and your participation is voluntary. I won’t respect you any less if you refuse or if you go and not win, I want to make this perfectly clear, but I came here like this to ask you this as a personal favor and not make it an order.”

We got to our feet and I said.”Of course we go. We will be honored to represent the Devi and do our best, Sir.”

He smiled warmly and there was open affection and a little pride in his eyes as he looked at each of us.”The tests are in every field of study you have already prepared and excelled in and then culminates in a final challenge that is different every year. However this time Admiral Elligott, several Academy commandants and I will personally supervise to make sure there won’t be any Clusen shenanigans going on if you know what I mean.” He leaned forward. “What I say now is completely of the record and you must keep that for yourself, because I have a feeling Admiral Dent will do and act in similar ways and I hope you competing will draw him out and make a mistake. A mistake I can use to end his career and perhaps close that darn Academy.”

Mao had forgotten to eat. “Why don’t you simply kick Dent out, if you think that way? You are Admiral Stahl, almost as powerful as God when it comes to all things Navy.”

“I explained the same thing to Captain Harris not too long ago. It is because of exactly that reason, because of what I am. I cannot abuse my power and do things just because I can. That would make me as bad as Admiral Swybin or even worse. I must and I will live by our rules till the day I die. I do have lots of power as you say and if I let it corrupt myself, even an iota I have lost everything I worked for all my life. Like you I live by our rules and stick to them.”

Mao leaned forward.” You know Admiral you’re alright for an immortal.”

The next day we had packed our bags once more and were ready for departure. Lt. Merkus had all the other remaining Midshipmen assembled and wished us luck, then to our surprise and without being told the other Midshipmen cheered and chanted:” Go O-Team! Go kick Newport Ass!”

Captain Harris intercepted us at the shuttle deck from where we supposed to take a long range shuttle.

He shook his head. “Oh no, you are not going like this to Newport, no not like this! My team, the team of the Devi in a measly shuttle, not on my watch!”

He kept saying things like that apparently more to himself than to us and motioned us to follow him.

Captain Harris led us on a slide way and only now he actually addressed us at least that what I thought. He said. “This is personal, even after all those years I am surprised just how much this arrogant bastard and his nose in the air know-it-alls bother me, but now I am sending the Olafson Gang.”

He looked at us and grinned. “If you are only half as good as you were until now, they are in for a surprise.”

I was not sure what to say to that but I tried. “Sir, I can only promise we will do our best.”

“I know that Mr. Olafson and that is all I ask. This is the Devi, the pride of the union and you are representing it. I can’t let you go in a shuttle and looking like that.”

Harris didn’t say much more and led us into a quiet almost deserted area of the 25th deck which was the largest deck and housed most of the Devastators larger auxiliary ships, such as destroyers, corvettes and the Thor Gun boats.

We ended our little odyssey before a massive door and he had to use his Captain Authority code to open it. A big red sign flashed the words.”Restricted Area.”

After we passed through that door into a featureless ante room, he pointed at an Auto-dresser in the corner. “All of you step in that thing and then follow through that airlock and meet me in the hangar behind. The Auto Dresser is already dialed in.”

The Auto Dresser changed our standard uniforms into sleek black belted combinations complete with the latest SI Hypra Suntorch blasters in low sling hip holsters, black leather jackets sporting the Devastator flag ship logo on the right arm. Har-Hi and my jacket also had the Wolfcraft squadron patches.

Black duckbill caps with the words USS Devastator embroidered in golden thread on its front. Those caps were usually issued only to long serving officers and were the envy of all military and many civilians alike. They were an ancient traditional head gear hailing back to the seagoing navy of planet Earth over 3000 years ago. I knew that because Wetmouth explained the significance to us.

The boots where polished pseudo leather with the latest all terrain soles also normally only allowed to be worn by officers of Full lieutenant or higher.

I checked for the .45 and made sure it was where it belonged. Har Hi did the same with his knifes and swords.

Wetmouth tugged on her wig and mask as she left the dresser and adjusted the duck bill cap. Decked out like that we all went through the air lock.

Harris stood next to a brand new Barracuda Class destroyer; it still sported the NX hull designation for an experimental craft. He made us stand in attention and personally checked each of us, adjusted little things on our new uniforms and finally stepped back with an approving nod. “I want them to know that you come from the Devastator and you won’t arrive in a lame D12 shuttle. Rank has its privileges and I use it to authorize that ADCAP-Barracuda Destroyer for you, it is the newest and fastest of its class and only a few have been issued so far. It will show them at Newport that I trust my senior midshipmen with a ship of their own.”

He gestured to the lowered boarding ramp underneath the belly of the sleek and fast looking ship. “Mr. Olafson at least temporary this is your first real command. Please bring her back in one piece if you can.”

The prospect of my own ship even for a brief time was like a rush to me. “Bring her back in one piece, Aye Sir!”

“She is fully stocked and armed and coded to you. Her stores are packed with munitions and supplies; the tanks are full. You have an excellent navigator in your little crew, so find your way to Newport and be there in ten days.”

Krabbel shrieked. “I just realized he means me. I am a good Navigator. Please Eric let me be the Navigator.”

Captain Harris pointed his flat hand to the Barracuda. “Get your show on the road Mr. Olafson and your ship out of my hangar.”

This Barracuda had an elongated flattened cylinder with four oversized ISAH pods attached to its aft. The hull tapered to a flat chisel bow just below the bridge section. It was 154 meters long and 44 meters wide at the back and only twelve meters wide at its nose. Even sitting on its landing gear it looked fast. It had accommodations for a crew of 200 plus it had room for 60 marines; was heavily armed and shielded all in all a prime example of the latest Union Fleet Mil-tech.

The small bridge had all the usual duty stations but much closer together.

I stood there for a long moment brushed my hand over the Command seat and a melodic voice chirped. “This is ADCAP Barracuda in Type IV configuration. Command officer Olafson, Eric recognized. Welcome aboard Captain, all systems are in standby mode and fully operational.”

I did not want to be vane, but I could not help myself wishing the machine would say that just one more time. I cleared my throat and said. “Take your stations and Mr. Shaka would you mind to take her out?”

“The only thing I would mind right now is dying and miss the chance to do just that, Captain.” He sat down behind the control with a deep sigh of pleasure.

“Mr. Krabbel plot us a course to Newport.”

He scurried to his seat and his arms flew over the controls. “Plotted and on the board.”

“Mr. Circuit, Engine status?”

Circuit stood by the engineering console and it was as if he had managed to grow a few inches. “My engines are primed on full standby and ready.”

“Ms. Elfiatra request launch permission.”

“Completing communications right now, Sir, we are cleared for launch. Hangar evacuated and hangar doors are opening.”