S13, E06: Abigail Williams (39), from Woking

We’re cruising along a narrow road – the only markings are the yellow no-parking lines, there’s no centre line, because the road just isn’t wide enough. It’s the kind of road Americans like our hostess, Jenna McCartney would think everyone in England lives on ... Narrow pavements on either side, then hedgerows, then old, terraced houses behind small gardens.

We watch the houses flashing by for a few seconds, then slow down before turning into the one-car deep driveway of a particularly old looking house – whitewashed walls, green window frames, a steep pitched roof with a smoking chimney.

We pull up infront of a door at the side of the house just as it opens, and a very familiar face (and body) appears ... It’s our aforementioned American host, Jenna, in another of her PVC business-suits, (this one is white and particularly shiny), the skirt barely reaches mid-thigh, the jacket pushes her pumped up fake boobs together to form a credit-card worthy cleavage (you’d love to swipe your MasterCard between them). She walks out of the house toward us with a cheery smile...

“Hello, and welcome to the show ... My name’s Jenna McCartney, and I’m your dirty little fantasy slut ... This week I’m in Woking to meet another hopeful lady who’s keen to come and join the ever-growing population of ‘The United Kingdom of Zoo’.

We cut to inside the old house, to the living room – tired furniture on the slate floor, and old pictures on the wall cracked plaster walls ... And to a middle-aged woman, perched on the edge of an old sofa. She’s wearing a summer dress that hangs close enough to her body to show she’s not exactly slim, and sheer enough for us to suspect she’s not wearing anything underneath.

Twisted and curly dark hair pulled back behind her head into a plaited pony-tail. Horn-rimmed spectacles perched on a crooked nose. A square face, thin neck, pale skin.

She introduces herself in an excited, slightly whiny tone – the end of each sentence trailing off into a hummmmmm. “My name’s Abigail ... Abigail Williams. I’m thirty-niiiiiiiine years old, and I’m from Wokingggggggg ... And Iiiiii ... I want to be sexyyyyyy-mmmmmm.”

We cut to Jenna, sitting on a chair opposite Abigail. “Everyone can be sexy, Abigail ... Could you tell us why you want to be sexy, and why you think appearing on our show will help you achieve your goal?” She sounds almost like a serious journalist.

Our guest takes a few short breaths, fighting back a nervous smile, let’s out a loud sigh, and then gets started... “I was always the girl at school that no-one was interested in. Girls thought I was too geeky to be a friend, and boys thought I was ugly, and that ‘scarred’ me, hhhmmmmm...”

She looks around the room at the crew, the cameras. “So, I’ve always had a pretty low self-esteem ... I know I’m worthless, so I’ll do anything to keep a guy ... I sort of to want them to, almost, like, abuse me – because if a guy finds out he can get away with that, maybe he won’t leave ... And even if he does leave, it won’t be so bad because it’ll mean the abuse is over ... But the more I think about abuse, the more disgusting it gets ... And the more I get turned onnnnnnnn ... And I’ve been like this since I was, about, 15 ... Just dreaming of having someone to abuse me...”

“And you think that’s because you’re not sexy?” Checks Jenna.

Abigail answers quickly, “I know I’m not sexy ... That’s why I need to do something sexy. Prove I’m sexy, to myself, and then everyone else can believe it.”

“Just as soon as you do...?” Adds Jenna.

Abigail puts one finger to her nose, points the other at Jenna. “Exactlyyyyyymmmm...”

“So...” Jenna thinks hard, trying to match her guest’s thought process, “ ... If you have sex with an animal, you think men will find you sexy...?”

Abigail half nods, half shakes her head, it’s hard to tell what she’s thinking. “If I have sex with an animal, everyone will know what I’m willing to do ... And someone will be willing to stick around...”

Jenna looks up briefly at the camera, a slightly concerned look on her face ... Then Abigail continues, “And the idea of it, the thought of doing something like that, it makes me soooooo hornnyyyyyy ... MMmmmmmmmmm.” She flashes a twisted but broad smile, then adds, “I can’t wait ... Maybe I don’t even need a mannnnnnnnnnnnmmmm...”

Abigail is clearly a couple of cans short of a six-pack – but she also definitely wants this. She’s thought it through, and she’s up for it ... So who are we to say ‘no’?

Our host confirms that we’re ready to go ahead with the show. “Okay ... Well, you asked for something extreme and disgusting, so we’ve brought along a little friend who should be able to make you feel really ... Really ... Dirty.”

The door opens and we hear the tell-tale wet grunt of our special guest star for the day – a 300lb, pink and bristly behemoth...

We see Abigail’s reaction - impressed and excited, but still a little disgusted by the beast.

“Abigail ... This is Winston...” Says Jenna from the side of the action, “What do you think?”

Abigail smiles into camera, “Oh he’s huuugggee ... And smelly ... And disgusting ... He’s perfect!! MMmmmmmmmnnn!”

“So, huge, smelly and disgusting ... Is that what turns you on?” Checks Jenna.

Abigail gives us another goofy smile as she stands up to welcome the pig - and nods enthusiastically as the big animal gets closer ... She certainly seems keen to get started.

“He’s very smelly...” She confirms for the viewers at home as the pig clatters around on the slate floor around her feet, brushing up against her shins hard enough to make her step backward toward her couch as the animal almost tips her coffee table over.

Her summer dress is up and over her head in a second, and she’s naked in a flash – saggy boobs and a big arse, her pussy hair trimmed short – definitely a quick hack with a pair of scissors, with a few stray pubes sticking out here and there.

He raises his wet nose as he seeks out the scent of a willing woman ... We pan the camera around as he passes us, waddling by, his huge scrotum looking as full as ever – and we follow, moving back toward where the newly naked Abigail is waiting with a wide grin on her face.

She looks up from the pink beast, toward our camera, and confirms, “Oh I’m really horny now ... I can’t wait!”

She gets increasingly excited as he gets closer. Barely able to look away from him, bringing her hands up to her saggy boobs and pinching her nipples gently.

Jenna follows Winston, ushering him a little, making sure he doesn’t turn ... She passes comment, “Oh Winston, this one wants to have a lot of fun with you!”

Winston stops just short of our guest this time, looking up at her – his snout at about the height of her roughly trimmed pussy ... Sniffing the air, his big mouth hanging a couple of inches open ... Ugly teeth showing, his breathing noisy and ragged.

Abigail stands just out of reach, looking down at him and smiling – looking to Jenna and commenting that, “He’s very biiig!” Pausing a second, then bending forward to give the big animal a nervous pat on the head ... Which turns into a flat handed rub over his head and to his thick neck/shoulder, followed by a very happy, “And rough...”

The camera angles down to look at the fat pig who walks through her hands, pushing toward her – he’s clearly very keen to get at this dirty little pale fleshed morsel.

She turns around infront of him, showing her goofy smile off to the camera and drops to the floor infront of the porcine monster, working on getting comfortable on the hard, cold floor as the big beast shuffles around behind her, one trotter raised slightly off the floor as if he’s just waiting for the word to go ... His fat head swinging around behind her arse, snout sniffing at her crotch as she begins to push it back toward him.

Jenna moves a step closer, leans in and slaps him on his hindquarters, urging him to, “Go on ... Go on...” – and the pig makes his move...

He sniffs the air behind her pussy, pushes his piggy snout between her thighs – snorts in, then out ... The hot air on her snatch making our guest gasp. “OOoooohhh!”

Abigail has her arse in the air and she’s pushing it back toward the pig, spreading her knees a little to drop her pussy closer to the floor – resting her weight on her elbows and forearms. Beginning to look nervous, but still clearly excited about what she’s doing. Pushing herself back toward him – gasping, “Come on ... Come on...”

And then, before she can react further, he steps forward and rises forward and up over her back. Trotters digging into the soft flesh of her upper back, pushing forward against her shoulder blades ... His large bulk pushing up onto her back. She almost collapses under his weight, letting out yell of surprise – almost loud enough for us to worry about the neighbours.

The fat pig ignores her yell, he’s too intent on corkscrewing his long, strange-looking cock into her pussy. Instinctively wanting to deliver a sloppy wet load into this total whore.

She holds position as he bucks and shuffles his hips against her arse, little shaking movements as that ugly, twisted cock, keeps on pushing out a couple of inches, rubbing against her arse, slipping into the crack of her arse and missing the pussy as it heads away from the dangerous zone. Twisting and turning as it tries to find its way home – like a self-aware worm looking for a hole to call home – which, in a way, he is...

“Oh bloody hell...” Gasps Abigail...

“Are you readyyyyy?” Checks Jenna from off camera, mocking her guest’s extended vowel sounds a little.

Abigail looks up toward Jenna ... A tense, thrilled look of anticipation on her face ... With her head up, this angle lets us see her chest heaving with excitement and the strain of supporting the big pig, her saggy boobs hanging down toward the slate tiles, wobbling as the pig moves behind/above her... “Yeesssssss!”

She arches her back a little, twisting her body – she’s trying to get comfortable, but she couldn’t have planned the move more effectively – because it unbalances the pig, making his trotters slip apart and slide down the sides of her body, leaving visible scrapes ... She can’t react to the scratching before his heavy body thumps down against her back ... Heavy and hard... ‘AAAHHHHWWwwwwwww!”

Now that he’s shoved up against her, his wide body pressing against her back, the pink monster finds his pupice lining up much closer to her pussy – his long, strange, twisty cock slipping out and slapping up against her labia ... Probing ... Twisting ... And quickly finding its way inside her...

She lets out a sound – it’s not a moan, or a sigh ... It doesn’t sound excited, or painful ... It’s just – a noise... “HHhaaaaahhhhhhh”