S01E013: Annabel Simpson (24), from Derby

She’s a slim, bubbly, young woman with long wavy strawberry blonde hair flowing down over her shoulders. Her face is dominated by an oversized pair of spectacles which make her hazel eyes look huge.

We interview her at her place of employment – a financial services provider in a quiet city center side-street. She speaks with a friendly, slightly high pitched Derbyshire accent.

“Hello, my name is Annabel Simpson, I’m 24 years old, and I’m a receptionist at [bleeped out for privacy reasons], in Derby.”

Annabel moves a lot when she talks, and she talks a lot when she moves. A pleasant, welcoming smile is never far from her face.

She tells us, at high speed – “I married John young, at 19, first guy that ever really showed a serious interest in me, but I was divorced by 22 because I found out that my ex wasn’t what he appeared to be. Let’s put it this way ... The ‘best man’ was very definitely the best man as far as John was concerned.” She says with a huge, obvious, wink.

We talk to her workmates – all men in shirts and ties, and the middle aged lady who manages the office. They all believe that Annabel is looking for love, probably in the wrong places. They say that she’s a lovely girl but perhaps a bit naïve. They think she’s being interviewed for a dating show, and they suspect that she’ll have trouble picking out the right partner.

“I suppose I can’t be too critical of him – we all keep secrets, don’t we? Mine is why I’m here today. ‘Cos I’ve never told anyone about it. No one. I talk to my mum, and I tell her just about everything, but I’ve never told her this. I’m not ashamed of it, or shy – but I do worry about what she would think of me for wanting it.”

Her mother, who is basically an older version of Annabel, around 50 years old, a little heavy-set, speaks to camera. “She’s a funny girl is my Annabel. She’s always been a bit headstrong. She gets these ideas in her head and she can’t get rid of them until it’s too late. I dread to think what she’ll come up with next.”

Annabel continues, “I think I was just surfing the internet, looking for porn, and I sort of fell onto one of those sites. Women having sex with dogs, and I was thinking that’s so wrong and it’s disgusting, but I was so turned on.”

She addresses camera directly, standing outside her place of business, with the sign above the door digitized out. “My name is Annabel Simpson, and I want to have sex with a dog.”

We cut to in car footage of Annabel being driven to Bristol by her mother! Annabel wearing the classic little-black-dress, cut low enough to show off a fair amount of cleavage. Little snippets of conversation as they appear to talk the whole way from Derby - arguing about the route:

“Why are we going to Bristol?”

“I’ve told you, that’s where they’re filming the show.”

“What’s in Bristol – the film studio?”

“The future, mum ... My future. I hope.”

“It’s a bloody long way, I hope it’s worth it!”

“Me too, mum.”

“Is it a man? You don’t have to go to Bristol to meet a man ... You’re a beautiful young lady, you can get a man anywhere.”

“Maybe I don’t want a man?” – which produces a hard sideways stare from her mother...

“Don’t make any silly decisions now, Annabel! One bad apple doesn’t spoil the bunch!”

They finally arrive in Bristol and pull up at the familiar frontage of Martin and Sue’s home*.

“This doesn’t look like a film studio...” Says Annabel’s mother.

They get out of the car and walk to the house. Annabel’s little-black-dress is figure hugging and barely reaches mid-thigh, dark stockings run down to black high heels. Her body isn’t perfect, but it’s not bad at all. Legs a little chunky, a bit of a belly, but fine.

They are greeted at the front door by Sue and invited into the home. Mother looks increasingly confused, whispering “What’s going on?”

They enter the living room and that big lovable black Labrador, Prince, is waiting for them. He immediately jumps up at Annabel, then at her mother, then at Sue when she enters. He must think he’s in heaven. Annabel makes a fuss over him, stroking and patting him, giggling that he’s a handsome puppy.

A minute later, Annabel and her mother are sitting side-by-side on the couch. Waiting for Annabel’s big reveal. She looks nervous, her mother is on the edge of her seat.

“Mum ... You’ve always been there for me. And you’ve always supported me. And I’ve always been completely honest with you about everything.” Annabel says, picking her words carefully and meaning every syllable.

“You’ve told me over and over that the right man is out there for me, and that I’ve got to go out and find him ... And I’ve always said I’ll find the right one one day. But I’ve been keeping a secret from you.”

Her mother looks nervous, hoping her girl isn’t a lesbian because she really wants grandchildren.

Annabel continues, “I haven’t been looking for a man, because men don’t really do anything for me anymore ... John being gay didn’t change anything, it just opened my eyes to ‘alternate’ lifestyles. I don’t want a man. And I don’t want to be with another woman...”

Her mother switches from nervous to confused ... Annabel takes hold of her mother’s hands.

Annabel takes a big breath, ready to tell her mother something she thought would always be her dirty little secret, her mother tenses up. “Mum ... Ever since I was at school, I’ve always wanted to have sex with a dog.”

There’s a deathly silent pause. Annabel holding her breath. Then her mother breaths out.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but that’s almost a relief ... The way you’ve been acting around me, the silences and the nervousness ... I thought for a second you were going to say you wanted to have sex with me!” She laughs a little ... As does Annabel, with a shake of her head. Then the ‘dog’ comment sinks in. “ ... but a dog ... Well ... I really don’t know what to say. I’m lost for words about that.”

Annabel cracks a bit of a smile. “This dog...” She says, pointing at Prince. Her mother gasps a little. “Today...?” She asks, and Annabel nods her response.

How do you feel about that?

“How should I feel...?” says Annabel’s mother. “I’ve just found out that my lovely little girl wants to have sex with a dog, for a television show...”

“You’ve told me over and over that the right man is out there for me, and that I’ve got to go out and find him ... And I’ve always said I’ll find the right one one day. But I’ve been keeping a secret from you.”

Her mother looks nervous, hoping her girl isn’t a lesbian because she really wants grandchildren.

Annabel continues, “I haven’t been looking for a man, because men don’t really do anything for me anymore ... John being gay didn’t change anything, it just opened my eyes to ‘alternate’ lifestyles. I don’t want a man. And I don’t want to be with another woman...”

Her mother switches from nervous to confused ... Annabel takes hold of her mother’s hands.

Annabel takes a big breath, ready to tell her mother something she thought would always be her dirty little secret, her mother tenses up. “Mum ... Ever since I was at school, I’ve always wanted to have sex with a dog.”

There’s a deathly silent pause. Annabel holding her breath. Then her mother breaths out.

“I can’t believe I’m saying this, but that’s almost a relief ... The way you’ve been acting around me, the silences and the nervousness ... I thought for a second you were going to say you wanted to have sex with me!” She laughs a little ... As does Annabel. Then the ‘dog’ comment sinks in. “ ... but a dog ... Well ... I really don’t know what to say. I’m lost for words about that.”

Annabel cracks a bit of a smile. “This dog...” She says, pointing at Prince. Her mother gasps a little. “Today...?” She asks, and Annabel nods her response.

How do you feel about that?

“How should I feel...?” says Annabel’s mother. “I’ve just found out that my lovely little girl wants to have sex with a dog, for a television show...”

Annabel has a hopeful, almost pleading look on her face. “I was hoping that you could be there for me – to make me feel ‘safe’. To help me through this.”