s5e19: Tiffany Black (36)

Series 5, Episode 19 - Tiffany Black (36)

We open with our beautiful shot of the United Kingdom – from space ... Pause for a moment – just long enough to notice that this week the shot includes lines of longitude and latitude ... Then we fall toward the planet at hyper-sonic speed, dropping from a low-Earth orbit toward the country, staying on the zero-degree line of latitude ... Dropping toward the south, toward the huge urban spread of London ... Staying on that imaginary line – right into the middle of the city ... Then toward a park on the south side of the Thames ... Reaching ground level in that park in seconds.

Once on the ground we are into live-action ... We spin around, seeing people walking in the park, sunbathing on the grass, reading quietly ... Then we’re looking at a middle-aged woman – sensibly dressed, long straight dark hair. We hear toward her...

With her big warm sweater, knee length skirt, and sensible black boots, she looks very conservative. Very much the yummy mummy type – not sensational, but likely to get plenty of attention if she wanted it. It’s a lot easier to imagine her picking the kids up from school, or reading a bedtime story, than it is to believe that she really wants to be on this show...

Once we are up close, we can see her soft, round features and twinkling eyes. When she smiles the bottom half of her face changes from round to triangular.

She speaks with a cheery and - considering the location - surprisingly Irish tone, “Hello there, and welcome to The United Kingdom of Zoo ... My name is Tiffany Black, I’m a 36 year old housewife and mother-of-two, and it’s my fantasy to have sex with a dog...”

We don’t do a montage this week ... Instead we just track backwards as our guest walks towards us through the elegant parklands. Very slow and relaxed, enjoying the scenic stroll. She tells us her story as we go.

“I was born and raised in Malone, on the south side of Belfast – and I had a very good childhood, great parents, always happy. My best friend – I won’t name her because that wouldn’t be fair to her ... She had a dog – he was big and strong, and very protective – he’d growl if anyone came near us in the park ... My friend, she used to joke about him being her boyfriend ... When we were about 14 or 15, and all curious about sex, but staying away from boys – we used to talk about what it would be like to have sex with him ... Like we were testing each other out ... Would you? I wouldn’t, but would you? Maybe I would, would you? It was all very exciting just talking about it ... Then one time, she starts playing with him and gets him hard, she pulls his sheath back and I’m staring at his cock ... And she’s asking if I want to play with it ... I was turned on, but I was terrified. No way was I going to touch it ... But she did ... She was daring me – would I suck it if she did? Would I let him fuck me if she fucked him first? I didn’t ... And she said she was just joking ... And she never asked me again ... I actually forgot all about it.”

She walks on in silence for a few seconds.

“We grew apart when I went to university, lost contact with her, got on with life ... I moved to England, met Steve, my husband, had kids ... When your show started and everyone started talking about dogsex and bestiality, it all came back to me ... But I didn’t actually watch the show. It didn’t appeal to me at all ... One night I was flicking through the channels and there it was – some young thing just pulling the sheath back to show off a dog’s cock ... And the memory came back to me, and out of nowhere I suddenly felt stupid for turning down my chance when I had it. I told Steve about it and he seemed more interested in my girlfriend and the fact that we were so young at the time ... He’s never watched the show, no interest in that – but teenage girls experimenting, THAT turned him on!!”

Someone behind the camera asks her if she ever ‘experimented’ with her friend other than that time with the dog. Tiffany smiles and nods a little, “She was my first kiss...” She pauses. “But that’s all ... A kiss and a cuddle ... And a few more kisses ... We used to practice kissing a lot ... I think that’s maybe why she wanted to share the dog with me – take our ‘friendship’ all the way ... Steve would have liked that...”

Again, she’s asked a question from off-camera, we don’t hear it, but we hear her answer.

“We’ve been together for 17 years, married for 14 ... Parents together for 12. It’s a little bit boring. I’m happy with him, and he’s happy with me ... But it’s not exciting. I suppose part of the reason I’m here today is because I want to get some excitement into my life – but also I want to see what I missed out on years ago ... Steve doesn’t know I’m here. I’ll tell him once I’ve recorded it. He won’t be happy ... But he might be turned on ... And if I enjoy it, and if he’s turned on ... Maybe we can get a dog...”

She’s asked, “What about your children? What if they see this and ask about it?”

“They’re 12 and 10, and they’re already all over the internet, so I’m sure they’ll find out about it ... I’ve no idea what I’ll tell them ... Mummy just wanted to have fun... ? Mary will be a teenager soon – maybe I can introduce her to the dog if she’s really curious...” She smiles and brings her hand up to her face, “Oh God, did I say that out loud!” She laughs, and we cut to...

Our studio in Manchester ... As usual, the corner of our set is made up to look a bedroom – a double bed with crisp white sheets spread neatly over it – not a wrinkle or crease in sight. Lights and microphones are positioned around the bed, and the floor infront.

We cut to the street outside and see a very new looking, yellow BMW X5 turning into our car park ... Inside, behind tinted windows, we can just make-out Tiffany behind the wheel, smiling broadly and giving us a little wave as she crawls it past the camera and spins the steering wheel to slot into a vacant parking space. She turns the rear-view mirror toward herself and checks that he make-up and hair are okay, and then opens the door to get out.

With the tinted glass out of the way we can see her clearly again. As before, she’s dressed conservatively (a figure-hugging sweater than confirms her large chest and narrow waste, sensible skirt confirming narrow thighs, and knee length boots), and her make-up is functional – she’s stayed classy. She still looks like a mother ready to collect her kids from school, rather than a slut ready to fuck a dog on camera. She shuts the door and strides away, giving us another little wave – remembering to turn and peep-peep her remote central locking, before heading into the studios.

We cut to inside as Tiffany signs in at our reception desk and is waved through to the rear of the building – where the studio is located...

Walking down the corridor, past the pictures of the ladies who’ve appeared on previous shows, and up to the familiar figure of Charley Ozvik, wearing one of her skin-tight white mini-dresses, her tanned arms and legs, and that big fake, tattooed and tanned chest, all in contrast to the white material. She waits with her hands behind her back and her chest pushed out, a welcoming friendly smile on her face.

“Hi there, I’m Charley Ozvik – and you must be ... Tiffany...” She says – once again stating the obvious. If she wasn’t so hot, and if we didn’t all associate her with disgusting acts of bestiality, her repetitive performances would be almost annoying.

“Hi, I’m Tiffany Black – nice to meet you...” Replies our guest in that soft Irish accent, as she leans in to give Charley a friendly one-armed hug.

Charley steps back and looks Tiffany up and down. “You seem to be the model of respectability ... So, what brings a nice lady like you to a place like this?”

Tiffany smiles broadly as she answers, “Well, looks can be deceiving ... I’m a little bit shy, and I’m a little bit conservative, but inside, I’m a really really dirty girl ... And I’m desperate to let that out...”

“So, would you like to tell the viewers at home why you’re here...” Continues Charley.

Tiffany turns a little toward camera and confirms what we already know, “I’ve come here today – to have sex with a dog!”

Charley steps back and takes hold of the door to the set, pulls it open and waves Tiffany through with her other hand... “If you’re looking to have sex with a dog, you’ve come to the right place ... Tiffany Black – welcome to the United Kingdom of Zoo...”

Tiffany smiles and steps forward, look Charley in the eye with a touch of “here we go” in her eyes, then looking around toward the camera and pulling a cringe-face as if to say “what am I getting into?”

In our studio – we look at Tiffany as she stands in the middle of the ‘bedroom’, looking around, checking out her surroundings.

Charley’s voice sounds out from behind the camera. “If you’d like to strip off and get comfortable, we can introduce you to your lover...”

“My dog you mean...” Smirks Tiffany.

“Of course...” Confirms Charley.

Tiffany waists no time in peeling her sweater up and off her body – exposing a belly that is narrow and slim without being flat, and a big pair of boobs that is trying fairly hard to escape from an impressively strong looking white bra.

She twists to the side and unzips her skirt, bending to push it down over her hips and thighs, wriggling a little to help it off. White g-string panties just about cover her pussy, the string disappearing up the crack of her mummy-arse...

She pauses, her hands held over her belly just above her g-string, taking deep breaths ... Pausing to let us have a good look at her – or more likely to calm her nerves before fully exposing herself.

After a few seconds she reaches up behind her back and unfastens that bra – as soon as the hooks are detached the whole thing pops forward an inch as her boobs push out. She slips the bra-straps off her shoulders and lets it fall forward down her arms and off, revealing a large (but not huge) pair of boobs, round and heavy, D-cups, that sag down a little but stay quite firm ... Her nipples are big and hard, brown against pale boobs. She smiles at the crew’s reaction (all thumbs up). G-string next – grabbing the sides, then slipping it down, the string catching between her arse-cheeks and pulling them inside out as she pulls them off – down her thighs, over her knees, down her calves, over feet and off ... We follow them all the way down her legs, before cutting back to a wide shot and getting out first view of her fully naked ... Slim, big boobs, clean-shaved pussy. There’s just a little sag in her belly, and Tiffany is clearly conscious about it, resting her hand on it.

“That’s it,” She says with a little smile, “That’s everything I’ve got!!” She sounds like she wants to give us more, but she has nothing to feel insecure disappointed about. Then she steps back toward the bed and sits herself down on the edge of the mattress ... Looks around ... Smiles a little nervously, then asks with a slightly joking tone, “Where’s the beast?”

And we cut to the large loading door of the dock as it cracks open and begins to roll to the side ... There’s a pause...

We see Tiffany looking nervous again ... Waiting...

Then back to the door – another second ... Then a huge, hairy beast bounds into the studio. A dark St Bernard, heavy and wide, his big mouth hanging open, tongue out flopping around as he runs toward the set. A long arcing run, seeking out his new play pal ... It’s Goliath – and he’s looking primed and set for sex!

Tiffany watches as he approaches, her mouth dropping open. Gulping as she looks sideways to the camera, a scared, incredulous smile on her face, then looking back at the beast ... Then up at the camera again ... A look of mock horror on her face, and says, “He’s a monster!”, but there’s a giveaway giggle in the way she says it. She’s not scared – she’s excited! She stands to meet him...

The huge beast doesn’t waste any time in stepping right up to her – pushing his big head up against her thigh (aiming for her crotch but she turns sideways to block him, and giggles).

She reaches down, bending forward slightly but keeping her head high – evidently wanting to look into camera rather than at the beast. “Yeah ... He’s a monster alright...” She says, almost to herself, as she rubs the top of his giant head.

She strokes his head as she builds up her confidence, then slowly lowers herself down until she is squatting beside him, her knees together and her bottom just off the floor – making sure he doesn’t try to stick his nose where she doesn’t want it – yet!

He’s standing there, looking a little frustrated, his tongue smacking out and up over his nose, then back into his mouth. Hungry ... Keen to get started ... Frustrated that this pink bitch is not presenting herself to him the way most sluts do!

She turns her head toward the camera, then angles it over toward him – giving him her cheek ... Her eyes scrunched up shut and her lips tight together. He takes the hint and starts to lick her – a couple of curious half-licks first, then when he’s sure he’s allowed, really letting loose with long, wet slopping licks. His tongue so big that each lick pretty much soaks half of her face.