Chapter 8: Never say never

On Tuesday, Al’s preschool class was half full. They had to hold school, though, for the parents who needed to go back to work.

The kids were jumpy. She hoped they didn’t have hangovers, but their schedules had all been askew and they were discombobulated.

By quitting time they were better, and Al went back to her own -- hopefully restored -- schedule. She had shut down her cell, and when she put it back in action, she had two texts.

| Lndd Luv U

and

| Apt Luv U

So Craig was back. When she got to the apartment, he was in bed reading. He got up when he heard the door. They met in the living room.

“Love you,” he said when they broke from the kiss. “Let me take your coat. It’s a bit chilly.”

“It’s as cold as the North Pole. And you’re not dressed for it.” He was wearing a flannel shirt and slippers -- with nothing in between.

“Well, I was in bed. I sat down forever in the plane and the car. It’s warmer in there.” He hung up her parka, and they both went into the bedroom. She saw the book on the bed.

“You’ve been reading my book,” she said. “It’s not your body.”

“Well, it was right there. I put my bookmark in the bottom.” She had finished Our Bodies, Our Selves, but she had left the bookmark in the last place she had used it before she finished the book. Craig thought moving someone else’s bookmark was terribly rude. Reading another person’s book, not so rude.

“Indian giver!”

“In my family, we always read the books we gave, sometimes before giving them.” while saying that, he was getting into bed. “Care to join me?”

“I have dinner to cook. You might get dressed and watch me.” So he put on pants, but not shoes. They told what had happened to them over the last few days. They had been in contact, but they’d let phone sex override communication.

“I now own two books,” she said while he was cleaning up. While she probably did more housework than she had at Sasha’s -- she couldn’t serve Craig the sort of meals she had often served herself -- there was something delightful about sitting after a meal and watching someone else clean up. “I sold the textbooks to a used book store -- often bought them there, too.”

“You need your own shelf.”

“There’s one empty.”

“That’s for library books.” he said. “It’s seldom empty this long, but I didn’t want to take risks over the holidays. You can have it; it’s your place, and you sure don’t use half the book shelves. But you should have any you want. That is accessible to the door. Probably you should have something which is at your eye level.”

“I own two books, the one you gave me last Christmas, and the one you gave me this Christmas.”

“Well, I didn’t learn your birthday until too late.”

“I still don’t know your birthday,” she said.

“Why don’t you ask Deb? That’s how I found out yours.” As if Deb knew his birthday!

“We’re not going back to bed,” she said suddenly. “Why don’t you put on some socks?”

“Darling,” Craig said when he came back to the kitchen a minute later carrying his Christmas gift (and still wearing his slippers).

‘He must have clean socks or shorts in his luggage, probably both,’ Al thought. ‘If he’d unpacked them, he’d be on page 100 by now. Craig is a dear man in many ways, but he is seldom neat.’

Anyway, it was nice to see him open her present. He kissed her for the book, and went back to bed to read it.

When she came in, he went out to do his bathroom time. He was shaven when he came back. The kiss was long and wet. His hand went to her breast on the outside of her nightie. Even so, it was a bit chilly. That wasn’t why her nipple stood out, though. She had missed him.

He moved his kiss from her mouth to her chin and then her neck. His face was smooth.

He pushed up her nightie, and she cooperated by raising her hips. Both hands left her for a second. Then, he was back with her Egg. It wasn’t cold, even against her breast. He was slow stroking it down to her pubic bone, then down to her thighs. This time, she couldn’t rush it. He played her, rubbing it from mid-thigh to an inch below her lips, then back, and then back up.

She was squirming by the time he lifted it from her skin altogether. An agony of waiting. Then he pressed it to her pubic hair only a millimeter from her clit. She gasped.

Then, she blew apart. He moved back, and her only contact was the vibrator pressing her against the mattress.

Everything else could fly around and did. Her arm and her leg hit him at separate times, but he didn’t move the vibrator.

Then he did, and he turned it off. She lay gasping, and then easing towards sleep.

He pushed the nightie up further, ducked under the covers, and kissed her breast. It took him eons to reach her nipple, and -- when he did -- he stroked her clit, too.

She was fully awake. Then, she was aroused. Then, she started to stiffen.

“Craig.” She needed him.

And he came over her, between her legs, and into her. He spread her, stretched her, filled her. His hands cuddled her breasts.

“Alicia, so succulent. I’ve missed this.”

“Me too.”

He moved deeply into her and almost out in long, slow strokes. When she pressed against him, he sped up. Every muscle was tense again. She was so close.

“Love,” he said.

She convulsed. He drew out to her outer lips. Then he drove into her and pulsed in her depths.

He was over her -- held off her chest by his arms, but pressing her elsewhere. The air crept around the covers, but his heat helped keep her warm. He oozed out slowly.

Soon after, he moved to her side. She backed into him, and he adjusted the covers. He put what must have been the vibrator on the night stand and readjusted the covers.

“I missed you,” he said. His legs were warm against the backs of hers, and she pulled the nightie down in front to keep that side a little warmer.

“Missed you, too.”

It couldn’t get any colder, but the next week it did. Saturday, Craig left her off at Deb’s, and she called from the entranceway of the building. He drove back from where he had parked and called her back, but she had already seen his car.

“Cray!” Anne screamed. She jumped in the front door and gave him a hug. Al considered the struggle while both doors were open to the arctic air and got in the back.

“I have my books in my own back pack,” Anne said.

“I see that you do, but we have to take it off to sit in the car ... Dora the explora, eh? Now let’s buckle this tight.”

“Grandpa gave it to me.”

“And isn’t it pretty! Your seat belt is fine. Let me get mine.”

“Anne! What do you say?” Al got in.

“Thankyouforthebookyougaveme, Craig.”

“You’re quite welcome, Anne.” Al couldn’t hear him laugh, but she could see Craig’s shoulders shake. He got himself under control, and pulled out into traffic.

He drove around a block to let them off in front of the library heading south. Then he parked the car and came back to join them in the children’s section.

They fed Anne mac and cheese. When they delivered her home, Deb told her to thank Craig and wish him a happy New Year.

Craig took their laundry down to wash it and took a book with him. He’d finished the Robb and another from Denver. His family gave him mostly books. Since he wore a tie every Easter, he had enough of them. She had supper prepared by the time he got back.

“Delicious,” he said at the end. She sometimes considered fixing him a shit sandwich to see how far his liking for everything she cooked would go.

“She needs to learn common courtesy, you know,” she said. Craig knew she was talking about Anne.

“Oh, yes, and she is in the process of learning. She hasn’t perfected it yet, but her greeting was spontaneous, and that was much more important to me.” He got up, put the dishes in the dishwasher, and started the machine.

“Want a warmer apartment next winter?” he asked.

“Yeah, though snuggling is fun.”

“Great fun. Well, the lease comes due May first, but the way to judge if the place is warm enough is to look when it’s cold. Maybe not this cold. Why don’t I look around, phone around, and then we’ll get a time when the two of us can visit.”

“Well, if you pay the rent,” she pointed out, “It’s really your apartment. You can visit by yourself.”

“It’s really my apartment, but one of my criteria -- my primary criterion -- is that you be happy living there.” That was sweet of him, although what made her happy in an apartment was Craig.

She took her bathroom time, and came back to find him on her side of the bed with the space heater on. As he left for the john, she slid between fairly warm sheets. When he came back, he got between the sheets and shivered.

“You are so good,” she said. He’d had two sets of cold sheets so she didn’t have to have any. He kissed all over her face while holding one hand under his arm. Finally, he arrived at her mouth, and she sank into a deep kiss.

His tongue wrestled with hers, and his hand stroked her over her nightie. He left her mouth to kiss down her neck. His hand left her and returned with The Egg. He brushed it all over her. He found the spot on her neck which turned her hottest, and passed the vibrator from one nipple to another until they both ached.

He moved the vibrator slowly down her body and then down her left thigh. He leaned back and tucked the covers around her neck. Then he moved The Egg between her legs and under the hem of her nightie. He watched her as he moved it up higher and torturously higher. She squirmed from the arousal.

“Please Craig,” she said. She needed it directly on her.

“You gave it to me. It’s supposed to be mine!” she said, but he was not impressed.

It inched higher, and she wound tighter. It got almost where she needed it, she eased herself down the bed, and he moved the vibrator with her body.

She was about to plead again when he kissed her. He swept The Egg up to her mound.

She came apart and moaned into his kiss. She writhed, but he kept the stimulation directly on her.

He relented only briefly. He took her up, and then over, three more times. Then he turned off The Egg.

He turned her over facing away from him. She cooperated, but he did most of the work.

“You are so wet, so warm, so welcoming,” he said. He pushed at her entrance, opened her, spread her, filled her. His legs were warm against the backs of hers and his stomach against her rump.

“So hard,” she said, “so hot.”

“So succulent.” His hand stroked up over her stomach to cuddle her breast. “So smooth, so soft.”

He played with her nipples, and they both firmed immediately. Her arousal grew, and she tried to hold herself still around the warm invader occupying her insides.

When she could no longer do so, she shifted in the bed, moving slightly and feeling him move in and out of her.

His hand left her; almost immediately, she heard The Egg start again. He brought it to her stomach and then lower. The progress was agonizingly slow, but she knew what was coming. She felt herself tense her muscles and clasp him more closely deep inside her.

He finally reached her pubic bone, and she tensed yet more.

“God, girl,” Craig said, “I feel it, too.” He moved in, out, in more deeply. The vibration drove her over the edge.

She shouted as she convulsed. Behind her, Craig echoed her shout. She felt him pulsing within her contractions.

The vibrations shook her long after she could respond. Then they left her, and Craig turned the vibrator off. His breath and hers slowed over time, and she was almost asleep when she felt him slip out of her.

“You didn’t really say that you’re planning to renew The Agreement,” Craig said.

“Well, I am.” She had never questioned that, indeed. Nor had she questioned whether Craig would.

It was a little early, and she lay in his arms thinking about that. He hadn’t actually said that he did, but he had both said that his top criterion for a new apartment was that she like it, and asked whether she was planning to renew the Agreement. Take that literally, and the choice was hers.

Actually, while the main Agreement -- which was essentially that they would live together, try to bring the other to sexual pleasure, and would not cheat -- was in fine shape, they had added new wrinkles. She should get her copy and read the rules. She was sure that her Egg and phone sex weren’t in there.

Neither of them could object to The Egg; he’d given it to her, and she had used it. The phone sex was equally consensual, and she liked the way it had brought him to express himself verbally.

She hugged his arm. She had liked the Craig she had taken upstairs to her apartment -- her Sasha apartment -- the first time. The one in bed with her now had changed at least twice, and both those changes had been for the better.

The next day, Craig went out for several hours in the late morning. That was probably the warmest part of the day.

She went to his bedroom computer. Wouldn’t you know it? The man had several flash drives. She found one labeled “A&C” and took it to her laptop. Bingo! It contained all the drafts of their Agreement. They were numbered, and she copied the last one onto her laptop. Long before Craig got back with a list of buildings, management companies, and phone numbers, the flash drive and the laptop were both back in place.

Her period would begin Monday night, and she stopped at a drug store on her way home Monday. If Craig used hand lotion on himself, she should probably check it out.

He took her up and over with his fingers, and then again with her vibrator.

“Gimme,” she said when he put The Egg down on the night stand. He handed it to her, and she put it under her pillow. “Lie back.” It was warmer out than it had been for weeks, but the bedroom still was not warm enough for lying down without any covering. She got the bottle of hand lotion she’d put beside her side of the bed. She poured it into one hand, and it felt cool. She rubbed her hands together until they were both warm and oily. She turned in his direction and reached under the bed sheets. When she reached his cock, it firmed in her hand.

“Oh, Alicia,” he said. She wrapped her hand around it, not too tight, and started moving her hand up and down his shaft. When he pushed up with his hips, she merely left her hand on him.

When he relaxed a bit, she let her hand go all the way to the tip.

When she felt that his body was stiff enough -- the cock had been stiff for the whole exercise -- she let go long enough to turn The Egg on. He grabbed two Kleenexes and balled them up. She gripped his cock again. Then she held The Egg against the base.

“Alicia,” he groaned. He tossed the covers aside and brought the balled tissues to the tip of his cock.

That had been just in time, too. She felt the cock throb between her fingers.

When it softened, he tossed the tissues into the waste basket and grabbed another to catch the last of the drip.

“Give me two of those, will you,” she said. She used the first Kleenex to wipe off The Egg and the second to clean the lotion off her hands.

“Love you,” he said.

“That’s lust.”

At school, the kids napped in larger groups than they were in the rest of their time. That gave teachers free time. Even when they were on monitoring duty, they could do something personal if it were not noisy.

Tuesday, she cranked up her laptop and opened the Agreement. She saved it to “Old” and opened it again. It was a nice agreement, but it expired at the end of April. She wanted to renew for another year, and she was sure Craig did, too.

Knowing him, she knew he would suggest changes. That was okay, but she wanted to suggest her own changes. And, unlike the time he sprung the first draft on her, she would be prepared.

She didn’t like being nagged. “Once in every menstrual cycle, Craig may propose to Alicia that EITHER they have sex during her flow OR that they get married.” He’d probably suggest one of each, and she would reluctantly agree.

The Agreement mentioned exclusivity as well as faithfulness. That might be an editorial excess, but she wasn’t going to suggest cutting it back. Craig sure dealt with a lot of contingencies. He’d said once that when something arose that was not covered, and she couldn’t imagine what that would be, that it would be dealt with in the spirit of the Agreement. Maybe they should say so.

Take it bit by bit. Parts 1 and 2 looked fine to her. Part 3 was the term, and by its nature would have to be changed. Craig had restated part 4 as, “If I’m in a car crash and laid up in the hospital, I don’t have to bring you off. You don’t have to bring me off, either, but you have to pay the utility bills.”

Part 5 was too complicated for her to get into that mess. She did wonder, though, whether Craig’s obligation to “maintain the apartment in a state of habitability” meant that he should be cleaning the kitchen, as well. That would be quibbling, but it might be fun to spring on him.

He seemed, so far as she could tell, to be following the spirit of Part 6. Of course, she only found out about “body of a wet dream” by accident. Still, he was on notice.

Part 7 was the cruncher. She had to admit that Craig had performed the obligations he undertook admirably. “At least one orgasm a night,” was usually two. It might be three as often as it was only one. Fantastic sex once a weekend was almost always twice. She noted that she had introduced almost nothing new since the Agreement was signed. In the course of their relationship, she had brought in riding him cowgirl, blow jobs, hand jobs, and using her Egg on him. He hadn’t been much more deviant, though they often used the cuddling position when the weather was cold and the vibrator he gave her had become a mainstay.

They should probably add something about the vibrator and phone sex.

Part 8 E had to be totally rewritten, too, in light of the Egg. Maybe masturbation should be moved from “Faithfulness” to “Sex.”

Part 8 A was mostly the essence of faithfulness, but Craig was right. You didn’t meet somebody and have sex with him any more than you decided to leave your marriage. You met somebody, got friendly with him, had a date, kissed, hugged, and then went on to sex. If you didn’t take the first step, it was easier to avoid the last.

It was wake up time now, and her cell vibrated. She closed her laptop and started to wake the kids. Was it her imagination, but were the kids who had been hardest to settle down now the ones who woke the crankiest?

The next day, she sat in her car and finished her suggestion for Part 7:

| 7) Sex: It is the intent of the parties to satisfy each other
| sexually and exclusively.
| A) Craig undertakes to satisfy Alicia’s sexual desires.
|. 1) He shall give her at least one orgasm a night on nights
| when they are both present.
|. 2) He shall bring her to satisfaction with as many or as
| intense orgasms as shall satisfy them both on at least one night
| (or, when mutually agreed upon, day) a weekend.
|. 3) Weekends begin with the end of work Friday night, and end
| at sundown Sunday night.
|. 4) He may satisfy this clause with his mouth, the vibrator,
| or his fingers when he does not have an erection.
|. 5) When Craig does have an erection, he must engage in vaginal
| intercourse within an hour of Alicia’s demanding it.
| B) Alicia undertakes to satisfy a reasonable amount of Craig’s sexual
| desires.
|. 1) The parties agree that Craig’s desires regularly overmatch his
| ability to perform, that this is Craig’s problem, and it does not
| reflect on Alicia’s fulfillment of this clause.
|. 2) Alicia will make herself available for intercourse every night
| when they are both in the apartment except during her menstrual periods.
| By mutual agreement, an afternoon may be substituted for a night.
|. 3) The method and frequency of her satisfying him during her menstrual
| period is Alicia’s choice.
|. 4) What Craig does to deal with his desire when Alicia does not choose | to do so is his choice, but it will not involve a third party being present. |. 5) Once, but only once, in every menstrual cycle, Craig may propose to | Alicia that EITHER they have sex during her flow OR that they get married. | C) Variety: |. 1) When Craig wishes to institute something new into their sexual practice | he will give Alicia notice, not later than the initiation of foreplay in bed. | She may then refuse. |. 2) Alicia has the right to redefine anything previously done except for | the missionary position and cunnilingus as “new” for the purposes of this | clause. She must do so one hour before the definition takes effect. |. 3) When she wishes, Alicia may institute any new position or | activity that does not physically harm either of them. |. 4) Craig will describe new positions and activities which he finds | desirable on a reasonably frequent basis. | D) Each party will avoid masturbation when the other party is available. |. 1) Masturbation when the other party is not available or not expected | to be available is acceptable. |. 2) Except when one party engages in it in the mistaken expectation of | the other party not being available, masturbation need not be reported to the | other party. |. 3) If either party brings himself or herself to climax with the other
| party looking on or listening in, that is not
| masturbation but an act of mutual sex.
|

That looked good. Still, her curiosity was piqued.

Craig complimented her dinner the next Monday, got up, kissed the top of her head, and began to clear.

“Remember our Agreement?” she began.

“I have it on flash drive, and we both had hard copies.”

“Well, it mentioned new positions.”

“Your Egg is within the rules.” He sounded defensive. “What you did with it might have been new, but I gave it to you in a box. That was certainly effective notice.”

“That was a very nice gift. What I wondered was whether there actually are positions we haven’t tried.”

“Whether there are a dozen or a hundred is a matter of how narrowly you draw the distinctions. Remember when you got on top of me? Is ‘Woman on top’ one position, or is it a dozen? Remember when we’d been running? Well, I laid you across the bed with your legs off the mattress. Is that different from our usual? But there are others. Part of the problem is that many of them don’t work under blankets. I have a book?”

“Why am I not surprised?” she asked. He had a book about everything, and he was kinky. So, he had a book about kinkiness.

“Wait, and I’ll get it.”

“Is your book case open to me?” She suddenly wondered what other books he might have on interesting subjects. He had a shit-load on uninteresting ones.

“Sure. Don’t move bookmarks, try to leave an obvious hole, and don’t put them back. Let’s use my bedroom computer desk for the return cart.”

She spoke about looking at his bookshelves, and he planned for a reading blitz.

When he was done with the dishes, he brought her The Joy of Sex.

“A lot of stuff in that,” he said. “Some, I don’t want, but I doubt you would, either. Two sets of pictures; the ones in back are classical Oriental, and not necessarily realistic.”

So, naturally, she looked at the ones in back first. The ones in front were a nice couple. She liked that Dr. Comfort started them off with a kiss.

Craig was in the bedroom working on his computer with the heater on. She didn’t like to have the TV on when he worked, though he said it was okay. Then, too, it was cooler in the living room. She took the book to the night stand, got her nightie, robe, and slippers, and went into the bath room.

Her night chores done, she returned to the bedroom and climbed into bed. It may have been the warmest room in the apartment, but the sheets were cold. Even though the top light was on, she turned on the lamp and got her book.

“Mind if I keep this side?” she asked Craig when he came back in his robe and slippers.

“Be my guest.” As usual, he wore pajama shirt, but not pants, to bed. “We really should get another lamp and night stand,” he said.

“Sh!” Obediently, he turned on his back and placed his hands in his arm pits.

He didn’t move, but desire seemed to be radiating off him. She figured that his hands would be warm enough in another 10 pages. Then she got to the end of the chapter, put the book down, and turned off the light.

“He says our bed is too soft,” she said.

“‘Too soft for Comfort’? Sounds like a contradiction in terms.”

“You know, I’m really grateful for that warm robe you gave me, and you let me have your side of the bed, and you lie warming your hands against your own body.”

“What is this?” he asked. “Be nice to Craig day?”

“I’m just reminding myself that you have good points to balance the awful puns.”

He laughed. “You wanted soft.”

“But it is your bed. You paid for it. When we split, you take the bed.”

“I believe I said, IF we split. Anyway, if we split, Comfort doesn’t care how soft the bed is.”

“Well, WHEN we split,” she said, “you’ll be with another girl, and you’ll need the firmness for sex, and you don’t know if she’ll want the softness for sleeping.”

“What put you in this mood?”

“Oh, Craig! I don’t want to lose you.”

“Okay,” he said. “You don’t want to leave me. I don’t want to leave you. Let’s fight about it.”

It did sound a little silly.

“Am I being silly?”

“We both have to face a long day of work tomorrow. Let’s go for efficiency. We’ll skip the quarrel and go straight to the make up sex.”

She started to laugh. He responded by tickling her -- with, thankfully, warm hands. She was rolling all over the bed and messing up the blankets.

He cupped her. He pressed down on her pubic bone so firmly that she stopped wriggling.

“See?” he said. “I have you now.”

He had his hand an inch from where she wanted it, but the nightie was in the way. “Okay. I give up.”

“Lift up.” She lifted her butt, and he drew the nightie up just under her breasts. “Oh, love.” He nuzzled the nightie up enough to bare her breast.

He licked and kissed and sucked her. His hand went between her legs and started stroking her outer lips.

He lifted his head and drew the nightie across her nipple with his mouth. “See?” he said. “I doubt if anyone would call this a new position, but it feels entirely different from this side.”

It didn’t feel all that different to her. It did feel arousing. He led her up; she felt herself tighten. He stroked slowly, and then rapidly. He sucked hard.

She flew. Then she fell. She landed in the soft bed and Craig’s arms.

He took her up again, now licking and sucking her left breast. He moved over her and between her legs.

“Oh, love,” he said when he entered her. “So warm, so soft.”

“So hot, so hard.”

Then he was stroking regularly deep within her. His hands cuddled her breasts, and his eyes looked into hers. Her tension reached a peak. “Come for me,” he said.

She flew apart.

“Which side do you want?” he asked long after. He withdrew and held himself above her. She moved to her right, and he went down to her left. They curled into their regular spoon.

“I’ve seen cross-words which defined ‘sane’ as ‘logical,’” he said to her hair. “I work with computers. There’s nothing more logical and nothing less sane.”

“And I live with a man who is just like that.”

“My point, exactly. I am logical. You say that my intention is to do something, and then you say that I don’t act logically on the basis of that intent. If I am logical and I don’t act logically on that intent, then logic -- if you’ll pardon me -- concludes that I don’t intend to act that way.”

She said, “I don’t believe that you INTEND to leave me.”

“I would say that I intend to not leave you. It’s a subtle difference. Do you intend to leave me?”

“Not really. It would tear me apart. But I’ve known women who stayed with their man. It was a mistake.”

“Sometimes,” he said. “But not all women who stayed by their man. You’re talking about women who stayed by their man when he mistreated them. Are my puns honestly that bad?”

“Let’s skip that question.” At that response, he squeezed her breast -- not hard, she took it as a gesture of fondness.

“We have rules. Have I broken them? Have I broken one of your rules that we haven’t written down?”

“No. No to both, really, but I think they need refining.”

“They certainly do,” he said, “as to term, if nothing else. I have some suggestions, too. Anne was last Saturday. Want to skip the Planetarium and work on the Agreement on Saturday?”

“Setting a day aside? You’re taking it seriously.”

“I think we should take it seriously. You expect me to adhere to it, as I expect you to adhere to it. ‘Sure, whatever,’ doesn’t lead to that.”

The bedroom was less cold these days, but she snuggled back against him, anyway.

Saturday, Craig brought the space heater into the kitchen. They refilled their coffee cups, and he put the remains in a carafe and started the process again.