Chapter 22: Make Love to Me

Andi drove from the theater to her house in silence. I was afraid to break it. My arm resting on the seatback let me softly touch her shoulder as she drove. Once at a stoplight, she pulled my fingers to her lips and kissed them, then put my hand securely back on her shoulder. Much though I wanted to, I didn’t dare put my hand on her leg beside the console. I didn’t want to seem pushy—or to cause an accident. I hadn’t felt this nervous since high school.

She pulled the van into the spot behind her duplex and as soon as we were both out of the car she grabbed my hand tightly as she went to the back door and unlocked it. She didn’t bother to ask whether I wanted to come in.

As soon as the door shut behind us, Andi’s lips were pressed against mine and we both moaned as we found each other’s warm, receptive mouth. I held her… no… I clutched her against me, willing her to simply know how much I loved her.

When Eric’s three-legged cats finally decided they liked me a few years ago—or at least that I was a fact in the building and wouldn’t suddenly disappear—they attached themselves to me at every opportunity. If I sat on the back steps to drink wine with Eric, or if a group of us gathered around a hibachi to grill steaks on the outside landing, they would twist around my ankles, rubbing and purring. If I failed to pet them in the right spot, they rubbed against me until they had satisfied themselves. Once, when I was juggling two bags of groceries that I’d carried down the hill from QFC, they slipped past me into my apartment. When I sat in my recliner they were suddenly both in my lap kneading my leg with their one front paw each and pushing every part of their bodies against me with purrs that shook the picture on my wall.

I swear that Andi was purring against my chest as she molded her body into mine.

Nor was I idle in petting her.

Whenever I took a breath to say something, she captured my mouth in another kiss. We were lost in each other. When Andi pushed me away firmly, I thought we were ready to return to cautious reality.

“Dag, Cali is spending the night at Alex’s house. Will you stay with me tonight? Please.”

“Andi…” It was what I wanted more than anything, and still I was so afraid that our relationship wasn’t ready. “Andi, are you sure? Once we do this we can’t go back. I love you desperately, but I don’t want to lose what we have.”

“Dag, my darling. We don’t have to sacrifice what we have for what we want. You’re a good man. I know you might break my heart one day, but I also know you would never be cruel or hurt me if you could avoid it. Now come with me.” She turned and headed toward her bedroom. I started to follow but stopped abruptly.

“Andi, wait.” She turned and I saw a moment of doubt and worry on her face. “I’m not prepared. I didn’t bring anything…” Damn the age of safe sex!

“Take one from the cookie jar,” she said, laughing at me. Then she stepped back into the kitchen and looked me straight in the eye. “Grab a handful.”

Once we were in Andi’s bedroom, everything slowed down. It wasn’t that we didn’t both desperately want to consummate our love, but neither of us wanted to miss anything about the experience. I looked around. In seven years of friendship I’d never seen Andi’s bedroom. Her bed was actually bigger than mine, no matter that I was nine inches taller. There simply wasn’t room in my apartment for a big bed and so I slept diagonally on a standard double.